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Those 'Oh God, I'm an Idiot' moments.

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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 804 ✭✭✭yerayeah


    I'm 35 years old and i have never once, before today, seen the connection between the words new and news!
    So, eh...I know exactly how you felt:)

    Glad to know I'm not the only one!!:pac: It's the simple things that always fly miles over my head!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 804 ✭✭✭yerayeah


    jellybeans wrote: »
    I still dont get it :(

    The way that I looked at it is that that the "news" was the "new" stories or happenings of the day.

    The news!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,228 ✭✭✭epgc3fyqirnbsx


    Ann22 should have her own thread :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 144 ✭✭northern lights


    Standing at cash machine (hole in the wall or whatever it's called) in a world of my own with a large queue behind me, I did my business, withdrew my money, and said 'that's great, thanks very much' as I walked away :o with the sniggering of those behind me ringing in my ears


  • Registered Users Posts: 320 ✭✭CorsetIsTight


    I was on the train with a friend and went to use the toilet. (I realise that that's already a candidate for an "Oh God, I'm an idiot" moment).

    The toilet wasn't at the end of the carriage we were in, so I had to go all the way down to the end of the next carriage.

    Finished doing what I needed to do, exited the toilet, and realised I had absolutely no idea whether I needed to go left or right to get back to my seat. Decided on right, and wandered along hoping to see some signs that I was going in the right direction. At some point, something made me think I had chosen wrong, so I turned around and went back, realising that I looked like an idiot to anyone who might have noticed.

    Then I saw a girl I'd been to school with, and whom I hadn't seen for years. Went up to her and said "Barbara...!", and she just looked at me and said "No" with such a sneery face that I wanted to disappear.

    I was so thrown by that, that I turned around again, and started walking back in what I had previously decided was the wrong direction.

    At which point, I heard my friend calling my name from behind me.

    So I had to turn around AGAIN, walk past not-Barbara, with (it felt like) the entire carriage looking at me, to my seat where my friend was breaking her heart laughing at me.


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  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,397 ✭✭✭✭Degsy


    Got up one morning,shaved,cleaned my teeth,got dressed,had some grub and jumped in my car.
    I was halfway to work before i realised it was a sunday and i wasnt working.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,971 ✭✭✭we'llallhavetea_old


    if thanks were sex, i'd be fairly raw after this thread.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,397 ✭✭✭✭Degsy


    if thanks were sex, i'd be fairly raw after this thread.


    Jaysus!


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,004 ✭✭✭Ann22


    When I was about 7yrs old, I was in my friend's back garden. I asked her if she loved her mam or dad the most...she said she loved her dad more...I found that surprising, her mam was really nice and her dad was very sour and had mad bloodshot eyes and greasy hair:confused:. Next time her mam came out to hang clothes on the line...like a gobsh*te I told her. Fcuk sake would you credit it??? I actually said to her ....'Carol says she loves her dad more than you'....I still remember the hurt expression on that woman's face.:(..


  • Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 8,572 Mod ✭✭✭✭Canard


    Aww that one is sad. :(


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 228 ✭✭Woow_Aqualung


    When I was 13 I was going out to a birthday party of one of my mams friends with my family. It was nearly time to go so my mam told me to go get changed. So I went up to my room. It was dark outside and the blinds were drawn. So I got undressed and then, out of reflex, proceeded to get into bed and fall asleep.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,004 ✭✭✭Ann22


    When I was 13 I was going out to a birthday party of one of my mams friends with my family. It was nearly time to go so my mam told me to go get changed. So I went up to my room. It was dark outside and the blinds were drawn. So I got undressed and then, out of reflex, proceeded to get into bed and fall asleep.

    Did you actually go to sleep and miss the party???:(:(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 228 ✭✭Woow_Aqualung


    Ann22 wrote: »
    Did you actually go to sleep and miss the party???:(:(
    No my ma woke me up. She couldn't belive it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,004 ✭✭✭Ann22


    Patchy~ wrote: »
    Aww that one is sad. :(

    I know, it's not even funny:(. I met that girl last year in Dunnes. I asked her if she remembered this incident and she did. Imagine! I can't believe my stupidity:confused:. Her mam worked full time and her dad minded her and her brother all day. When her poor exhausted mum got home from work, her dad went out on the p*ss every evening (I only found this out in later years). One of my earliest memories is of her and her brother stark naked flying' down the street on one those wee toy tractors (one peddling and one pushing) round the street and the dad bootin' it after them:D:D:D...


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,004 ✭✭✭Ann22


    No my ma woke me up. She couldn't belive it.

    Ah that's grand..now I can laugh at your brainlessness:D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 228 ✭✭Woow_Aqualung


    Ann22 wrote: »
    Ah that's grand..now I can laugh at your brainlessness:D

    Like the rest of my family.


  • Registered Users Posts: 369 ✭✭jellybeans


    I like this thread, anyone got anymore? :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    I was practicing feeling the liver on someone for a college exam. She was already lying down and I was only able to stand on her left side due to the right of her bed being against the wall. So I decided to be nice and feel on her left hand side, for her "left" liver.




    It took me a while to realise there's no left liver.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,300 ✭✭✭Indubitable


    Fishie wrote: »
    I've done absent-minded baking before... Like the time I decided to make my Dad a birthday cake, I looked at the ingredients and just put them all in a bowl and cooked it, I didn't even stir it like... I don't know what the hell I was thinking, believe it or not I'm usually quite good at baking, I was probably hungover or something. Anyway, the cake didn't turn out very well. I blamed my friend Clare for giving me a crap recipe :o

    I made pankcakes without flour one day. I was mesmerized thinking about this girl living next door.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭4zn76tysfajdxp


    Piste wrote: »
    I was practicing feeling the liver on someone for a college exam. She was already lying down and I was only able to stand on her left side due to the right of her bed being against the wall. So I decided to be nice and feel on her left hand side, for her "left" liver.




    It took me a while to realise there's no left liver.

    Well, I guess it's a good job you're doing medicine, eh? :)

    *Strolls away, whistling*


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  • Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    You'd think after a year I'd know where a liver was. I was very tired though (which doesn't bode well for my time as a sleepless intern in the future)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭4zn76tysfajdxp


    Piste wrote: »
    You'd think after a year I'd know where a liver was. I was very tired though (which doesn't bode well for my time as a sleepless intern in the future)

    Were you hungover as well?*






    *For the added irony.**






    **I'm not sure what "irony" means.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    It was a pretty ironic scenario tbh, I was a little rusty.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 804 ✭✭✭yerayeah


    Piste wrote: »
    I was practicing feeling the liver on someone for a college exam. She was already lying down and I was only able to stand on her left side due to the right of her bed being against the wall. So I decided to be nice and feel on her left hand side, for her "left" liver.




    It took me a while to realise there's no left liver.

    I've heard rumours of a clinical years student being asked to assess the tone of a patient's lower limb, and whipping out the stethoscope!:D


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,810 ✭✭✭phill106


    Piste wrote: »
    It was a pretty ironic scenario tbh, I was a little rusty.

    Hold on, you were tired, AND MADE OF METAL?!


  • Registered Users Posts: 17,736 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    I once poured tea all over my cornflakes.

    My ex mixed up farenheit and celcius when he was cooking and turned honey-roast chicken into a charcoal briquette. My housemate dug out the chicken, soaked it in water for 2 days, then ate it. Manky backstard.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,272 ✭✭✭✭Max Power1


    phill106 wrote: »
    Hold on, you were tired, AND MADE OF METAL?!
    http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055922224


  • Registered Users Posts: 59 ✭✭ForceOfNature


    i woke up and looked out the window and realised that my van was gone. called the coppers and reported it stolen. then i realised the previous evening i had driven to the chemist and walked back home. my father in-law jim and his mate twiggy had a right laugh............:rolleyes:


  • Registered Users Posts: 217 ✭✭Lynnsie


    I couldn't find my phone the other day so I rang it from the landline, when it started ringing on the other side of the room I hung up and ran to answer it, then wondered why it stopped ringing...

    A few years ago I thought I saw my sister in a shop and was about to go over and talk to her when I realised it was a mirror :o


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  • Registered Users Posts: 7,073 ✭✭✭Rubberlegs


    One morning I awoke to the sound of " Mam, Mam!". I was all groggy n shouted back " wha:mad:??". No answer. This went on several more times, till i realised it was a feckin great crow cawing outside on a wire! Nearly s**t meself laughin:D. If that wasn't bad enough the very same thing happened the next morning and I'm still screechin "WHA??" at the crow......


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