Men No Longer Want to Date, Why?

Anita22

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119429750#Comment_119429750

Anyone who has to state that. You've probably never been with a woman.

Drop kick a woman in the ovaries. Wasn't that the expression you used on the FairCity thread? One fella should do to a female character. Sicko

Yeah people absolutely do mean well - I used to think the same: anyone can find someone if they work on themselves... but then I realised that there are, very sadly, some people who just don't have much of a chance, or in some cases, no chance. I don't think A Man of Constant Craic seems like someone who has NO chance though, but there are people in very sad situations (e.g. severe disfigurement). I know a guy who's a small person/dwarf, and takes it awfully bad when it comes to finding someone.

You don't have to be gorgeous though - hardly anyone is gorgeous. You don't even need to be all right looking - plenty of people who aren't exactly lookers are in relationships (hardly anyone is ugly) but if your confidence is shattered by your looks, then that in and of itself is a further barrier.

WJL

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119429786#Comment_119429786

We had an arrangement we wouldn't buy presents..she wanted a Christmas present but there was no codding me I wasn't going to buy her the Christmas present 🤣🤣🤣

You must be from fucken Cavan🤣 Did ye sign a sort of pre nup, pre relationship contract? You should have had your solicitor there..probably represent yourself 😂

You're comedy gold Pussy.

WJL

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119164343#Comment_119164343

Well said Sir. Sums up this thread.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119429864#Comment_119429864

Agreed, looks can be subjective but I mind myself, stay in shape with hourglass figure, have straight teeth etc and dress nicely.

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119429916#Comment_119429916

True.

If you're attracted to somebody you're attracted.

Physical attraction is important. But! Everyone is different.

Confidence in yourself can be a turn on. A cute raise of the left side of your lip can make me weak at the knees.

We're all different.

bucketybuck

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430200#Comment_119430200

Worse, a mickey measuring contest with the worlds most obvious Walter Mitty.

I'm genuinely surprised that somebody believed a single word he said.

Pussyhands

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430200#Comment_119430200

I won't be engaging with him and his 5 other accounts anymore on this thread. 😊

AbusesToilets

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119429003#Comment_119429003

That's an obvious lie, since you had a nice little whinge at being called out for your support of Russia's murderous actions in Ukraine.

Pussyhands

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430252#Comment_119430252

OK

Pussyhands

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430241#Comment_119430241

Who me?

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430252#Comment_119430252

I just don't understand that. What are the grounds for supporting such an invasion other than "Donald Trump praised Putin" or just to be contrarian. The "nazi" thing is about as convincing as the tooth fairy, seeing as there's no concern expressed by the same people over neo nazis in Russia, Poland, Britain, the U.S. And Ukraine's 40-odd million population is hardly comprised entirely of nazis. The president is Jewish ffs.

WJL

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430244#Comment_119430244

You're not well. And you don't have the ability to 'engage' with me. I'm wiping the floor with you😅

Your posts speak for themselves, a negative, boring, misogynist who's too mean to buy a Christmas present. Books a slapper to bring home each weekend and is too mean to pay for a meal out. All by your own admission. Good riddance. Myself and my wife are heading out for a meal.

Gussie Scrotch

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119425767#Comment_119425767

This post is right on the money.

Western women are the most pampered section of society globally.

Today, in the western world, marriage is a terrible deal for a man.

Ten of Swords

@WJL and @Pussyhands your off topic bickering has been deleted. Just drop it, or put each other on ignore if you have to

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119429949#Comment_119429949

Yup, a lovely friend of a friend asked me out on a date last week, he's perfectly nice, has a good sense of humour, good job etc. But I was not at all physically attracted to him so I politely declined. More women don't care about a guys looks though compared to the shoe being on the foot. Women generally prefer kindness and reliability in a guy than his looks where men then to prioritise looks in a woman over other features.

Potential-Monke

I'm a... Volcel? I don't go looking for it, voluntary celibate. Don't know if that's a thing, but that's me. I stopped trying. I got sick of trying. I mainly got sick of rejection. Some lads seem to take rejection in their stride, but not everyone. I've on occasion asked for feedback, and it was always different but the general "don't like you that way", or "just friends" craic. I'll admit to not being the most confident, so that probably didn't help. I've zero confidence now, but I don't care anymore. I'm just not what these women were after, and I can't see myself being "attractive" with my current lifestyle.

Everyone says it's simple, just get this, just be that, just, just, just... It's not that simple for some people, but it's human nature to not think of the non-standard. I can't see why I wasn't attractive. At the time had the good job, my own house, no real issues to speak of, so I can only put it down to being a gamer and not into sport, so different. And as the years have passed, I've embraced that more and given up on trying. Doesn't help that I don't want kids, and most women in my age range would be looking for that soon, so even less of a reason to try right now. Maybe I'll have luck in my 50s, only 10 years to go!

But yeah, I mainly stopped because I got sick of rejection. Can't lose if you don't take part!

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119429806#Comment_119429806

Change your environment. It's not hard to understand. Certain cultures place importance on particular physical attributes. If it's important to you that you meet someone for relationships, then interact with those not of your culture. I'd recommend Asian women because they simply find different physical (and personality) characteristics to be more attractive than others.

I'm tall, very skinny, and throughout my time in Ireland, I had dreadful success with women.. whereas when I lived abroad in Europe for a while, I had far more success. Moving to Asia compounded that success even further because being tall and skinny was desired there.. whereas the typical desired appearance in the west was less popular.

The point being that if it's not working for you, change your environment (or those you're hanging out with). It's not difficult once you get over the initial negative internal speech.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430531#Comment_119430531

Women generally prefer kindness and reliability in a guy than his looks where men then to prioritise looks in a woman over other features.

Everyone judges their initial impressions of others based on their appearance. That initial appearance tends to form the basis for the next few interactions.. and while women might value kindness or reliability, in most cases, they're looking for someone attractive first. Unless of course, we're talking about women in their mid-30s/40s and have already had their series of dodgy relationships with attractive people, and so, place greater importance on other attributes? (As have most men at the same age, and still single). However, even then, though, physical appearance still forms the basis for that first impression above all other things.

Men are initially focused on the physical appearance of women, but that's as much social conditioning as anything else. Although, it's worth considering how many relationships continue after the woman has gained a lot of weight or has stopped taking care of her appearance (yup, the men look awful too). It's not as if all these relationships are ending.. so there must be a lot more than physical attractiveness involved, and not just on the female side of the relationship.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430850#Comment_119430850

I'm basing my info off surveys, many find it's men who prioritise physical attractiveness in a partner whereby women prioritise kindness and helpfulness/reliablity

aligator_am

I'm definitely not saying that Irish men (myself included) are anywhere near perfect, but I think more and more men here and in the West in general if they have no commitments like marriage or kids, if their situation permits them then they will be upping sticks and moving to places like Asia and South America to escape Western women (not all of them in fairness) and the insanity they seem to permeate.

I'll be visiting the Philippines for the first time post covid in the coming months and came across this video, the attitude disparity between women there and some of the women here is a bit of an eye opener to be honest.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vgm6_ETMZes

chuchuchu

In general women dont need men anymore in western countries. Thats the problem. We have made it too easy. Think of the type of politicians we elect, think of the policies they pass, think of the amout we pay in tax, think about where that tax money is going, think about the technologies we have created. The individual man has made himself useless, unless he happens to be very wealthy or very good looking or vey popular.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430910#Comment_119430910

Whereas research in the fields of interpersonal relationships, both in the social sciences and mainstream science, point to the recognition of the importance of physical appearance, particularly at the first meet, but also during subsequent meetings. It's simple biology, which affects the wiring in our brains. Society itself has reinforced that natural process through the use of literature, movies, tv, advertising/marketing etc.

Surveys are remarkably prone to bias, especially that of "response bias", being influenced by what people think should be said, rather than what they truly believe on the matter involved. It is a traditional stereotype that women are more interested in feelings over the physical and that men are more interested in the physical over feelings.

It's an outdated stereotype, especially considering how much society has changed over the last fifty years.

aligator_am

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119431015#Comment_119431015

I'm certainly not disagreeing with you, but I do find it both funny and worrying that more and more of the same ilk of women who would have been previously doing cartwheels that the "patriarchy" (in this case, just normal dudes, not some crazy extremist sect) was being dismantled and put out to pasture.

These same women are now wondering why men won't approach them or why they can't find relationships. In the West at least, I can't see this new dynamic ending well.

gary550

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119430910#Comment_119430910

if you think women prioritise kindness and helpfulness you live a sheltered life

try being a kind helpful loser - you ain't getting any off any women that's for sure 😂

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119431060#Comment_119431060

Looked up a recent survey of 14000 people and women prioritised security...💶💶💶

YellowLead

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119431143#Comment_119431143

Totally true, not sure why the focus has been on looks for men in this thread. Men are the ones who are far more biased when it comes to looks in the opposite sex.

BUT that only means that well off men and good looking women have an advantage when it comes to dating - not that they are the only ones who can date! ‘Average’ people do just fine.

For those who are complaining - as somebody said just be doing something with yourself: have a job, have some hobbies, make a bit of effort appearance wise - clothes neat grooming and weight; and don’t be aiming for the cream of the crop looks or money wise as those that have those will choose accordingly. In other words, stay in your lane.

kowloon

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119431143#Comment_119431143

I have a monitored alarm system and women never want to hear about it.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119431337#Comment_119431337

What, the one around your ankle?! :)

kowloon

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119431891#Comment_119431891

Correction: I have two monitored alarm systems.