My beautiful racist girlfriend

Long story short, I've started seeing a girl who has recently come out with some pretty racist remarks.

She's a well educated, otherwise intelligent, fun and interesting person. Strangely for a racist, she's fairly well travelled and has lots of interesting opinions. But she is openly racist towards one particular foreign nationality.

Her attitude stinks, and I've tried talking to her but she is unapologetic.

What would you guys do? Is this a deal breaker for most people? It's a deal breaker for me in terms of any kind of on going relationships but most of my male friends think it's an overreaction.

I'm not going to post details of her specific bigotry because would turn into an ugly debate on that nationality and probably a defence of her opinion.

I'm just curious as to whether a racist attitude would cause AHers to break up with someone

KERSPLAT!

Absolutely. Dropped like a hot spud.

clairewithani

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

Long story short, I've started seeing a girl who has recently come out with some pretty racist remarks.

She's a well educated, otherwise intelligent, fun and interesting person. Strangely for a racist, she's fairly well travelled and has lots of interesting opinions. But she is openly racist towards one particular foreign nationality.

Her attitude stinks, and I've tried talking to her but she is unapologetic.

What would you guys do? Is this a deal breaker for most people? It's a deal breaker for me in terms of any kind of on going relationships but most of my male friends think it's an overreaction.

I'm not going to post details of her specific bigotry because would turn into an ugly debate on that nationality and probably a defence of her opinion.

I'm just curious as to whether a racist attitude would cause AHers to break up with someone

Beauty fades. Bigotry/racism makes a person ugly in my view. Definitely a deal breaker for me.

hairyprincess

Are her reasons justified? Has she experience of this race?

Lackey

You will have to define what you mean by racist, the word has lost all meaning lately.

scudzilla

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RovF1zsDoeM

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Get away from this relationship pronto.

MadDog76

I'd need to see a photo of the racist in question before I could offer a relevant opinion.

buried

Drop the hate.

neonsofa

hairyprincess wrote: »

Are her reasons justified? Has she experience of this race?

Well unless she's had experience of the whole entire race that's irrelevant. Racism is never justified.

hairyprincess

hairyprincess wrote: »

Are her reasons justified? Has she experience of this race?

she cites plenty of bad experiences but nothing outstanding. Getting ripped off by a few Euro etc.

To thw person who asked what I mean by racist, I'm not naming the nationality but yes it's clearly racism. We're not talking a qualified opinion on "some people from x", etc. She wants none of these people in the country

Manic Moran

But she is openly racist towards one particular foreign nationality.

Sounds like nationalism more than racism. You won't hear my Greek parent (or ex Greek Air force uncle) say a single nice thing about a Turk, (I suspect Armenians are the same way), Koreans have...issues.. with Japanese simply because they are Japanese, plenty of folks from Ireland have had issues with the English, not many Arabs will say good things about Israelis...
These aren't racist opinions, they are based on national history. Racism is an opinion of superiority or better worth than someone because of skin color or ethnicity. Nationalism doesn't care about race, but definitely cares about the society that they come from.

The Raptor

Sounds like a hypocrite for someone that has traveled. Did she think she was loved wherever she went. But she thinks it's OK to be racist.

BBDBB

How beautiful exactly?





Come on, we're all thinking it

Can a person be a good person and have a prejudice?

I think they can, plenty of people I grew up with were racist or homophobic, it was simply the norm 20 years ago. I wouldn't share their views but it wouldn't make me write them off as people either.

Ferrari3600

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

I'm just curious as to whether a racist attitude would cause AHers to break up with someone

Absolutely not, within certain limits.

beertons

Would ya put up with it for the ride?

HenryHill

My girlfriend has views like this about Africans and I don't blame her to be honest.

Manic Moran

Manic Moran wrote: »

Sounds like nationalism more than racism. You won't hear my Greek parent (or ex Greek Air force uncle) say a single nice thing about a Turk, (I suspect Armenians are the same way), Koreans have...issues.. with Japanese simply because they are Japanese, plenty of folks from Ireland have had issues with the English, not many Arabs will say good things about Israelis...
These aren't racist opinions, they are based on national history. Racism is an opinion of superiority or better worth than someone because of skin color or ethnicity. Nationalism doesn't care about race, but definitely cares about the society that they come from.

That's not really what nationalism is
I'm not going to get into semantics but if you're characterizing an entire people, be they a nationality or a skin tone, as having identical and uniformly negative characteristics, that's racism
Or at least, it's ethically and morally equivalent to racism.

Dr Crayfish

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

She wants none of these people in the country

If it's the people I'm thinking of, none of us want them here!

whoopsadoodles

HenryHill wrote: »

My girlfriend has views like this about Africans and I don't blame her to be honest.

The whole continent like?

Robsweezie

Contact BBC or channel 4 and try get a documentary out of it

HenryHill

whoopsadoodles wrote: »

The whole continent like?

No it's the black ones.

The Raptor

HenryHill wrote: »

My girlfriend has views like this about Africans and I don't blame her to be honest.

Is it black Africans or white Africans or just all Africans?

JamboMac

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

Long story short, I've started seeing a girl who has recently come out with some pretty racist remarks.

She's a well educated, otherwise intelligent, fun and interesting person. Strangely for a racist, she's fairly well travelled and has lots of interesting opinions. But she is openly racist towards one particular foreign nationality.

Her attitude stinks, and I've tried talking to her but she is unapologetic.

What would you guys do? Is this a deal breaker for most people? It's a deal breaker for me in terms of any kind of on going relationships but most of my male friends think it's an overreaction.

I'm not going to post details of her specific bigotry because would turn into an ugly debate on that nationality and probably a defence of her opinion.

I'm just curious as to whether a racist attitude would cause AHers to break up with someone

Why are you asking a question, when you've already decided for yourself. If you can't put up with it then leave, none of us can define whether she's really racist or not as all we have is your opinion.

EIREDriver

MadDog76 wrote: »

I'd need to see a photo of the racist in question before I could offer a relevant opinion.

Need more info from OP.

1) Photo of racist
2) Nationality she doesn't like
3) Contact details / Phone number of racist

Seriously though if it bugs you a lot and her thoughts aren't valid at all probably best to end it.

The Raptor

HenryHill wrote: »

No it's the black ones.

You should give her a black eye.

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

hannible the cannible

It wouldn't bother me unless she was out in the middle of the night burning crosses in someone's garden , I mean I'm kinda racist myself but I'd draw the line at getting up in the middle of the night

nostro

Is intolerance towards racists not in and of itself racist. What you're really saying OP is that we are intolerant of her views because you do not agree with them.

hannible the cannible

The Raptor wrote: »

You should give her a black eye.

Did you just advocate domestic violence ?

Turtyturd

JamboMac wrote: »

Why are you asking a question, when you've already decided for yourself. If you can't put up with it then leave, none of us can define whether she's really racist or not as all we have is your opinion.

Spot on, she clearly deserves better.

Permabear

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

I'm aware of that

I'm not asking for personal advice. I had a conversation with some male colleagues who felt that racist attitude wasn't a sufficient reason to end a new relationship.

I'm curious as to whether that's a common view to hold

BBDBB

I've learned that eventually time makes us all prejudice

foxatron

If you said who she dislikes you might get a better picture of other peoples opinions on them as well. You never know she might be in the majority and not the minority....but I doubt it though.

Four Phucs Ache

If she was an employee in an organisation and dealt with the public and a colleague overheard her views and reported her she would be spoken to.

Not acceptable and by posting your issue it screams that your uncomfortable.

A for dropping her , she is allowed her views and opinions as is everyone but if it's a deal breaker for you than let go.

Yourself isit

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

I'm aware of that

I'm not asking for personal advice. I had a conversation with some male collwagues who thought a racist attitude wasn't a sufficientreason to end a new relationship.

I'm curious as to whether that's a common view to hold

It depends.

nostro

nostro wrote: »

Is intolerance towards racists not in and of itself racist

No.

EIREDriver

Photograph of "beautiful girlfriend" and one of her mates.

MadDog76

EIREDriver wrote: »

Need more info from OP.

1) Photo of racist
2) Nationality she doesn't like
3) Contact details / Phone number of racist

Seriously though if it bugs you a lot and her thoughts aren't valid at all probably best to end it.

The OP needs to test his resolve on this issue fully ........... I'd suggest that, the next time he's having intercourse with the racist, he pulls out around 30-20 second mark before the point of orgasm and say "We need to talk........" .......... if he can do that then he should break up with her as it's obviously something he can't ignore and/or get over, if he can't then he's weak and deserves a life of sexual bliss with this monster!

The Raptor

hannible the cannible wrote: »

Did you just advocate domestic violence ?

Was that a bit too much?

A Tyrant Named Miltiades!

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

Long story short, I've started seeing a girl who has recently come out with some pretty racist remarks.

She's a well educated, otherwise intelligent, fun and interesting person. Strangely for a racist, she's fairly well travelled and has lots of interesting opinions. But she is openly racist towards one particular foreign nationality.

Her attitude stinks, and I've tried talking to her but she is unapologetic.

What would you guys do? Is this a deal breaker for most people? It's a deal breaker for me in terms of any kind of on going relationships but most of my male friends think it's an overreaction.

I'm not going to post details of her specific bigotry because would turn into an ugly debate on that nationality and probably a defence of her opinion.

I'm just curious as to whether a racist attitude would cause AHers to break up with someone

Something tells me we'll see you in this thread soon :pac:

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057686488&page=39

Fleawuss

Relationship? You already know it's going nowhere by posting a question on a public forum. So you're really asking how long do the benefits outweigh the fact that you find this person repellent? Depends on you and how needy you are for the benefits.

pablo128

My missus wasn't particularly racist. Then about 5 years ago she started driving. Now, with plenty of near misses and incidents, she is very racist!:pac:

MadDog76

EIREDriver wrote: »

Photograph of "beautiful girlfriend" and one of her mates.

I'd drop those two racist scum in a heartbeat!!!

This one however ............... http://www.thefrisky.com/2013-12-10/tila-tequila-is-now-a-nazi-sympathizer-who-calls-herself-hitila/

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

B.A._Baracus

Hey op,
I know you don't want to go into all the details. But is there anything more you can say?

I ask that because your friends say it isn't a big deal. But you say it is. So any example you can give?
It's hard to take a side when most of the details aren't said.

hannible the cannible

The Raptor wrote: »

Was that a bit too much?

I didn't realise there was an acceptable amount of it , my apologies

MadDog76

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

Her boyfriend is an idiot ........... and so is she!

Grayson

Manic Moran wrote: »

Sounds like nationalism more than racism. You won't hear my Greek parent (or ex Greek Air force uncle) say a single nice thing about a Turk, (I suspect Armenians are the same way), Koreans have...issues.. with Japanese simply because they are Japanese, plenty of folks from Ireland have had issues with the English, not many Arabs will say good things about Israelis...
These aren't racist opinions, they are based on national history. Racism is an opinion of superiority or better worth than someone because of skin color or ethnicity. Nationalism doesn't care about race, but definitely cares about the society that they come from.

It's still racism of a sort. There's a clearer/historical reason for it but it's racism. If you dislike one person, not based on the person they are but because of their country/ethnicity/race then you're a bigot/racist.

Yourself isit

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

Hey op,
I know you don't want to go into all the details. But is there anything more you can say?

I ask that because your friends say it isn't a big deal. But you say it is. So any example you can give?
It's hard to take a side when most of the details aren't said.

He's trying a social experiment here. Eventually he will post a picture of an extremely hot Russian chick, and say he dumped her because she hates on Georgians.

And we'll all go: " no, that's not what we meant!"