Stupid deli workers, annoying as fucκ

Olishi4

Worked on a deli when I was a teenager for a couple of months and I found it really boring. You'd be delighted when finally a good song came on the radio in the shop and then a customer would turn up and ruin it. :pac:

Some people would want mountains of filling on their roll. It would barely hold together. I'd say they'd need a plate and a knife and fork to eat it.

somesoldiers

suicide_circus wrote: »

Those deli chicken fillets are so ropey, the only way theyre palatable is if you get the spicy kind and have plenty of other fillings.

And they are about 0% breast too, in fact there is more breast in **Insert name of person with very small breasts**'s bra

XLR 8

dfeo wrote: »

When I ask for a white roll, don't just assume want butter and just put a glob on the knife.

Don't look so shocked at me ask me if "I'm sure" when I tell you I want neither butter nor mayonnaise.

Don't cut my roll open with a butter-laden knife after I clearly stated that I don't want butter, thus leaving butter residue in my roll.

When I ask for meat, salad and stuffing, don't jam in the salad and put the meat on top then drizzle the stuffing on top, thus causing it to fall out.

When you cut my roll in half GO ALL THE WAY BASTARDING THROUGH, don't just cut half way thrugh it leaving me to tare the rest.

And please don't bake the roll till its so hard it literally splinters into my gums. And does everything have to have a twinge of fu(K1n ketchup off it. You look it'll be on the bag or the wrapper it'll be there or on the edge of the roll. Ketchup should be applied outside the shop at the fuel pump. Rant over..

milehip

dfeo wrote: »

.

When I ask for meat, salad and stuffing, don't jam in the salad and put the meat on top then drizzle the stuffing on top, thus causing it to fall out.

Ah rookie mistake young lad, you gotta give them the fillings on the instalment plan,
if you want stuffing on the bottom meat in the centre and salad on top.
just say stuffing when asked Ist,then they'll ask you anything else?
You say meat,cue eye roll.
is that all they say through gritted teeth to which you respond salad and presto
you're the annoying one in the transaction.

EICVD

Relax to f***!

mikeym

Any Delis open tomorrow?

lawred2

mikeym wrote: »

Any Delis open tomorrow?

Was walking out of local filling station after getting diesel this afternoon... Some fat mess strode in and to his dismay saw that the deli had shut early for Christmas Eve..

Shouts 'de fooken deli's shut for fook sake' over his shoulder to the equally fat mess of a girlfriend that was following a little behind..

I immediately thought of this thread..

RobbingBandit

mikeym wrote: »

Any Delis open tomorrow?

Sure there is a few open but they might spit in your role or wrap.

9935452

Grandeeod wrote: »

Ah FFS! This is getting rediculous! Virtually every roll/sambo is cut in half.

.

They only started cutting the damn things in half about 2 or 3 years ago.
Personally i prefer it not to be cut in half but some do it automatically , they might even ask you do you want it cut in half , you say no and they still do it.

A pet peeve i have is when they cut open the roll , some cut it open so far it splits in two , top half and bottom half and when you start to eat it it goes everywhere.

XLR 8 wrote: »

And please don't bake the roll till its so hard it literally splinters into my gums. And does everything have to have a twinge of fu(K1n ketchup off it. You look it'll be on the bag or the wrapper it'll be there or on the edge of the roll. Ketchup should be applied outside the shop at the fuel pump. Rant over..

Agree , i lovea good soft roll but believe tomato sauce should be put in before anything else. . Otherwise it goes all over the place

_Jamie_

Olishi4 wrote: »

Worked on a deli when I was a teenager for a couple of months and I found it really boring. You'd be delighted when finally a good song came on the radio in the shop and then a customer would turn up and ruin it. :pac:

Some people would want mountains of filling on their roll. It would barely hold together. I'd say they'd need a plate and a knife and fork to eat it.

I did too. Yeah, some people were shamelessly greedy, asking you to add more and more.

the_pen_turner

9935452 wrote: »

They only started cutting the damn things in half about 2 or 3 years ago.
Personally i prefer it not to be cut in half but some do it automatically , they might even ask you do you want it cut in half , you say no and they still do it.

A pet peeve i have is when they cut open the roll , some cut it open so far it splits in two , top half and bottom half and when you start to eat it it goes everywhere.



Agree , i lovea good soft roll but believe tomato sauce should be put in before anything else. . Otherwise it goes all over the place

100% nail on the head.

Joe Hill

Frosty McGiggleShaft wrote: »

I saw a guy order a chicken fillet sandwich in a deli....

.....with one slice of bread. He didnt want 2 slices.

Deli dude was confused as fcuk.

Pissing myself laughing at this
It was me!!!

HellSquirrel

As an ex-deli worker, when there's a whole damn queue of you at lunchtime, all wanting x, y and z, tell me what the hell you want starting off and then I can make the thing so it doesn't fall apart. But if you uhm and ah for five minutes while the people behind you are getting annoyed because this is half their break (and they will take it out on me rather than you, asshole) and decide that you want salad and then chicken and sure bung a bit of ham in there and then mayo, don't blame me when the daft concoction falls apart and mayo goes all over the place.

Oh, and if you order a load of things that is not covered by "a breakfast roll" to be in there*, you will get charged more and shouting and screaming and throwing the thing at me will gain you no sympathy. Especially when I've told you during the process that extra food in it will cost more. And I don't give a flying if you're related to the store manager, the deli manager, all my bosses, my mother and everyone who would ever hire me in the future. Asshat.

I hope I never have to work in another deli.

*"Only two sausages? Put another one in there. And another piece of bacon. Not that piece of bacon, that piece over there. And oh my god, why isn't there more hash browns? Didn't you realise people would want them? Ugh, you put in BLACK pudding! I want WHITE pudding. Obviously. And mayo. Lots of mayo. Oh, and some mushrooms. Ugh, why is this so full? OH MY GOD, YOU'RE ACTUALLY CHARGING ME EXTRA?!"

*I hope you choke on a frog.* /gritted smile

Hammer89

From the Things That Annoy You thread:

Hammer89 wrote: »

I'm stood at a deli this afternoon. It's taken about 15 minutes to get served because the queue is honestly about five meters long. They hired two new people and their roll and wrap-making skills are piss poor I'm afraid, which is to be expected, but why have two of them working at the same time? That didn't seem efficient to me.

But I get to the top finally and I'm thinking, 'Please just don't **** this up'. I ask for a white roll and he gets a white roll. We're off to a good start, but I complicate things massively by asking for spicy chicken and sliced cheddar cheese. He points to that yellow cartoon cheese with holes in it and goes, 'This?'. I'm there, 'No bud. Cheddar please.' He reaches into the tub of grated cheedar and grabs a handful. 'No bud. SLICED...please'. He gives me a look as if to say, 'Sorry it's my first day'. First day on earth? Who doesn't know what sliced cheddar is?

I'm willing to let bygones be bygones providing there's no more catastrophes along the way, but of course there is. He cuts up the chicken fillet and puts that in the roll first. I'm thinking, 'Good jesus there's going to be 80% of the cheese slices sticking out of the roll because there's no f*cking room now'. He realises this as well, after the damage is done mind you, and starts cutting the cheese into tiny little squares. At this point I'm tempted to pinch the bit in between my eyes with my thumb and index finger and just shake my head in annoyance.

I have one last request that I know he'll get right - or so I thought. I complicate things further by asking him to cut it in half, but he must've thought I said, 'Divide it 70:30 please mate' because that's what he did. Then I had to wait about two minutes for the sticker because soppy presumably couldn't find my ingredients, but in his defence, the roll was nice so there's a happy ending to this trivial saga.

I feel sorry for him now looking back.

Melisandre121

Myself and my OH were getting rolls the other day, she put so much butter on I felt ill watching and had to say "oh that's plenty thanks". Then my OH asked for mayo and taco sauce on his, she used a big knife to put mayo on his roll and then dipped the same knife straight into a big bottle of taco sauce rather than wipe it or use a different one .. vile

Mister Vain

I stopped off at a small petrol station in Castledermot yesterday and I got a chicken roll. When she asked me if I wanted it cut in half, I immediately thought of this thread. I watched carefully as she cut it all the through - ALL THE WAY THROUGH I TELLS YA. They don't do anything by halves in Castledermot... ohh wait.

sdanseo

The cutting in half thing is part of the realtively new phenomenon where people eat rolls at tables and other civilised ways.

In my day - it's nearly a decade since the deli now - there was none of that. Having the roll cut in half was a special request. This was in the boom so 90% of those in line were builders - they ate their roll out of the damn tinfoil (no one uses tinfoil any more, bless their meagre profit margins) like a normal person.

9935452

sdanseo wrote: »

The cutting in half thing is part of the realtively new phenomenon where people eat rolls at tables and other civilised ways.

In my day - it's nearly a decade since the deli now - there was none of that. Having the roll cut in half was a special request. This was in the boom so 90% of those in line were builders - they ate their roll out of the damn tinfoil (no one uses tinfoil any more, bless their meagre profit margins) like a normal person.

Dunnes stores still uses tin foil

Atari Jaguar

9935452 wrote: »

Dunnes stores still uses tin foil

Not any dunnes I've been to recently.

Mister Vain

Ahh yes, back in the day when we used to eat chips out of a newspaper.

exaisle

dfeo wrote: »

When I ask for a white roll, don't just assume want butter and just put a glob on the knife.

Don't look so shocked at me ask me if "I'm sure" when I tell you I want neither butter nor mayonnaise.

Don't cut my roll open with a butter-laden knife after I clearly stated that I don't want butter, thus leaving butter residue in my roll.

When I ask for meat, salad and stuffing, don't jam in the salad and put the meat on top then drizzle the stuffing on top, thus causing it to fall out.

When you cut my roll in half GO ALL THE WAY BASTARDING THROUGH, don't just cut half way thrugh it leaving me to tare the rest.

Maybe you should buy a large bottle of Kopthefukon to put on your roll.

Put yourself in the server's position....working in a job for minimum wage and as a bonus having to put up with an a$$hole like you.

Try being a bit polite in future....you could make it your New Year's Resolution. If you want your roll made a particular way, just try explaining politely and clearly exactly what you want and thank the server (bonus points if you do so with a smile) instead of ranting on the internet about it.

Sue Pa Key Pa

Melisandre121 wrote: »

Myself and my OH were getting rolls the other day, she put so much butter on I felt ill watching and had to say "oh that's plenty thanks". Then my OH asked for mayo and taco sauce on his, she used a big knife to put mayo on his roll and then dipped the same knife straight into a big bottle of taco sauce rather than wipe it or use a different one .. vile

Seriously, is this where proud Irish men & women face up to the challenges of 2017?

Commotion Ocean

I've ordered my roll, I told you what I want. DON'T ask me 'do you want butter or mayo?'. If I wanted it, I would have asked. Stop behaving as if it's not normal to not have either.

Guffy

Commotion Ocean wrote: »

I've ordered my roll, I told you what I want. DON'T ask me 'do you want butter or mayo?'. If I wanted it, I would have asked. Stop behaving as if it's not normal to not have either.

Its not. 1 in 25, more, maybe

Sam Kade

Melisandre121 wrote: »

Myself and my OH were getting rolls the other day, she put so much butter on I felt ill watching and had to say "oh that's plenty thanks". Then my OH asked for mayo and taco sauce on his, she used a big knife to put mayo on his roll and then dipped the same knife straight into a big bottle of taco sauce rather than wipe it or use a different one .. vile

Oh dear your troubles are truly small :rolleyes:

DoozerT6

Also, after probably making a hundred damn rolls already, it's probably just an automatic reflex for deli staff to ask that question. Part of the process.

Ben Gadot

HellSquirrel wrote: »

As an ex-deli worker, when there's a whole damn queue of you at lunchtime, all wanting x, y and z, tell me what the hell you want starting off and then I can make the thing so it doesn't fall apart. But if you uhm and ah for five minutes while the people behind you are getting annoyed because this is half their break (and they will take it out on me rather than you, asshole) and decide that you want salad and then chicken and sure bung a bit of ham in there and then mayo, don't blame me when the daft concoction falls apart and mayo goes all over the place.

Oh, and if you order a load of things that is not covered by "a breakfast roll" to be in there*, you will get charged more and shouting and screaming and throwing the thing at me will gain you no sympathy. Especially when I've told you during the process that extra food in it will cost more. And I don't give a flying if you're related to the store manager, the deli manager, all my bosses, my mother and everyone who would ever hire me in the future. Asshat.

I hope I never have to work in another deli.

*"Only two sausages? Put another one in there. And another piece of bacon. Not that piece of bacon, that piece over there. And oh my god, why isn't there more hash browns? Didn't you realise people would want them? Ugh, you put in BLACK pudding! I want WHITE pudding. Obviously. And mayo. Lots of mayo. Oh, and some mushrooms. Ugh, why is this so full? OH MY GOD, YOU'RE ACTUALLY CHARGING ME EXTRA?!"

*I hope you choke on a frog.* /gritted smile

What a post! You've inspired me to seek out R&R again.

biko

Commotion Ocean wrote: »

Stop behaving as if it's not normal to not have either.

It isn't.
How do you otherwise get the stuffs to stick to the bread.

Ferm001

When cutting my sandwich in half, cut it diagonally and not rectangular. Everyone knows triangle sandwich's taste nicer.

Pac1Man

Most of you sound like the kind of people that would return your asparagus in a restaurant because it retained too much water.

"...butter residue..."

"... dipping the taco knife into the mayonnaise..." even though you asked for both, therefore making no fkcuking difference.

It's a five quid role. The workers are on minimum wage or close to it and quite rightly don't give a sh1t about your butter residue. If you are that particular, bring your own.