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Shortest jokes ever!

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12357…10

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    #122
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?


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    #123
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!


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    #124
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak.


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    #125
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Why do women have two holes so close together? In case you miss.


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    #126
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    What do you call an adolescent rabbit? A pubic hair.


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    #127
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Alimony: The billing without the cooing.


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    #128
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    What's the difference between parsley and puss? Nobody eats parsley.


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    #129
    hungrypig
    Registered Users Posts: 311 ✭✭hungrypig


    ruaidhri quinn


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    #130
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    How do you know you're really ugly? Dogs close their eyes when they're humping your leg.


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    #131
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    What did the Leper say to the Prostitute? Keep the tip.


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    #132
    im invisible
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,373 ✭✭✭im invisible


    civil servant


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    #133
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    What should you do if your boyfriend starts smoking? Slow down.


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    #134
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    What's sticky, white and falls from the sky? The cumming of the Lord


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    #135
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.


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    #136
    youtheman
    Registered Users Posts: 1,269 ✭✭✭youtheman


    Q : how do you confuse a homosexual
    A : six


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    #137
    tayto lover
    Registered Users Posts: 51,508 ✭✭✭✭tayto lover


    A squirrel went on the beer one day and lost his keys.

    He was locked out of his tree.



    I'll get my coat.


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    #138
    shootermacg
    Registered Users Posts: 4,833 ✭✭✭shootermacg


    Confucius say: Man who have hand in pocket, feel cocky all day.
    He also say: man who go to bed with itchy ass, wake up with smelly finger!


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    #139
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    When chemists die, they barium.


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    #140
    barleybooley
    Registered Users Posts: 1,241 ✭✭✭barleybooley


    Confucius say "Man walking sideways through Airport door going to Bangkok"


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    #141
    shootermacg
    Registered Users Posts: 4,833 ✭✭✭shootermacg


    he also say:

    Man who take sleeping pill and laxative on the same night will wake up in deep sh*t.

    Man who jizz in cash register come into money.


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    #142
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.


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    #143
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    How can you tell a tough lesbian bar? Even the pool table has no balls.


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    #144
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.


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    #145
    Supermensch
    Registered Users Posts: 270 ✭✭Supermensch


    What do you call a convent full of nuns? A Virgin Megastore.


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    #146
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    What do mountains talk about? A range of topics.


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    #147
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.


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    #148
    bdoo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 574 ✭✭✭bdoo


    I heard a dyslexic lesbian singing tony christies 'Show me the way to ramadildo'


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    #149
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    It takes many nails to build a crib but one screw to fill it.


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    #150
    Bootup
    Registered Users Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    I've been to the dentist several times so I know the drill.


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    #151
    little swift
    Closed Accounts Posts: 90 ✭✭little swift


    whats black white and blue and flys through the sky................
    ........................................................................................
    ........................................................................................
    a magpie with a wrangler jacket on........................................


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