Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Shortest jokes ever!

«13456

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 53,835 ✭✭✭✭tayto lover


    Are people who jump into the river in Paris insane ? (in seine)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    The leper went to the gun dealer to buy some arms.


    The dyslexic dog? He barked, "Krab! Krab! Fur! Fur!"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 34 jackdock88


    Man walks into a bar and says ouch


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    The cross-eyed dog? He kept barking up the wrong tree.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,120 ✭✭✭fungun


    yore ma


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Half the people you know are below average.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,630 ✭✭✭Koloman


    A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says, "Why the long face?"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 656 ✭✭✭Bearhunter


    Dyslexic bloke walks into a bra...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 53,835 ✭✭✭✭tayto lover


    The dyslexic protest march to the Dail ended in chaos when they all arrived at Aldi.


  • Posts: 50,630 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Six out of seven dwarves aren't happy


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 220 ✭✭tonedef


    Dwarf shortage


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,629 ✭✭✭Hunchback


    .


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Headquarters: The room where enlisted women blow the officers.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 40,230 ✭✭✭✭Mellor


    Stationary shop moves


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 420 ✭✭Paulie Gualtieri


    Old McDonald was dyslexic a,e,p,m,x


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 420 ✭✭Paulie Gualtieri


    Enda Kenny


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Headquarters: The room where enlisted women blow the officers.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,268 ✭✭✭BunShopVoyeur


    Bono


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,122 ✭✭✭saintsaltynuts


    How do ye cook a monkey?
    Gorilla.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Contrary to popular belief, Grape Nuts is not a venereal disease.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 949 ✭✭✭LoanShark


    D'ya hear about the missing Romanian? Well, there will be no Big Issue..


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Another name for pickled bread is Dill-dough.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,037 ✭✭✭Nothingbetter2d


    what do you call a confused chinese man? Hu Yu


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,037 ✭✭✭Nothingbetter2d


    what do you call a chinese man that was arrested by mistake? Won Gai


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    That cow joke is a load of Bull!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Taxidermist: A man who mounts animals.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 42 PhantomShrimp


    RTE


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Trust: Two cannibals giving each other a blowjob


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,119 ✭✭✭Mongarra


    Conversation between 2 gay cowboys - "Yup?". "Yep".


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Optics researchers have lots of light reading.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 112 ✭✭Plumpynuter


    Leaper says to hooker,

    Keep the tip


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 112 ✭✭Plumpynuter


    Went to the zoo with only one dog in it

    It was a shiatsu


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 112 ✭✭Plumpynuter


    Ahern


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    There’s a repair shop for baroque musical instruments.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    A pyromaniac was quite disappointed when he checked out Match.com


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,346 ✭✭✭blindpilot


    Velcro. What a rip off!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    The wise never marry, and when they marry they become otherwise.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    A nurse is a pan handler.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    do they get virgin wool from Ugly sheep.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,317 ✭✭✭TheIrishGrover


    Yore knob


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    The leper lost the poker game when he threw in his hand.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Dammit i'm mad is Dammit i'm mad spelled backwards


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 949 ✭✭✭LoanShark


    I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,135 ✭✭✭POINTBREAK




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    When women enter middle age, it gives men a pause.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,743 ✭✭✭blatantrereg


    Hemingway was famed for his "For sale: baby shoes, never worn."
    Bit of a sick bastard really; that's not funny at all.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 386 ✭✭lmao


    N B G A..... That's bang out of order.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Curiosity Killed the Cat: that's the dog's story, and he's sticking to it


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,036 ✭✭✭theoneeyedman


    shortest joke in history.....Irish rugby's record of grand-slam wins over the last 70 odd years!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 541 ✭✭✭rgmmg


    3 testicled russian - whodyounik abollickov


  • Advertisement
Advertisement