Dental plan!

krudler

Hey its that kid! its the "i didnt do it" boy!
He's mine! I own him! and all the subsidiary rights!

bonerm

Why Marge , look at all those flys buzzing round youre head! you're a mess woman!

Sam Vimes

Stupid gravity

-Leelo-

- You're gay for Moleman
- No you're gay for Moleman


- Nobodies gay for Moleman

krudler

Ms Hoover, was president Lincoln ok?
He was fine Ralph, go home.

Live4Ever

Auctioneer: Next on the lot, Krusty's plane, Im on a-rolla gay!

Krusty: No! You can't sell my plane? I remember a night when me and Dean Martin flew to Vegas in night. The moon hit his eyes like a big pizza pie! We wrote a song about it.... but it infringed on a song he'd wrote years before.

Live4Ever

Wossack wrote: »

Bart: [whining] Mom, my slingshot doesn't fit in these pockets. And these shorts leave nothing to the imagination. These uniforms suck!
Marge: Bart! Where do you pick up words like that?
Homer: [on phone] Yeah, that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.
Marge: Homer! Watch your mouth!
Homer: Aw Moe I gotta go, my damn weiner kids are listening.

Quality line.

krudler

Live4Ever wrote: »

Auctioneer: Next on the lot, Krusty's plane, Im on a-rolla gay!

Krusty: No! You can't sell my plane? I remember a night when me and Dean Martin flew to Vegas in night. The moon hit his eyes like a big pizza pie! We wrote a song about it.... but it infringed on a song he'd wrote years before.

I love that episode

32 cartons of pornography!
awwww, all I brought was a nickel, I didnt think there'd be pornography

The_g-man

Ahoy, have you seen this man?

Y'ar, that's Handsome Pete, he dances for nickels.


Arr! A quarter! He'll be dancin' for hours!





Titanya: But Duffman, you said if I slept with you I wouldn't have to touch the drunk!

Duffman... says a lot of things! Oh, yeah!

Busi_Girl08

"You could close down Moe's or the Kwiki-Mart,
And nobody would caaaare!
But the heart and soul of Springfield is...
It's Maison Derrieeeeeere!!"

SeaFields

Homer - "three simple words....I am gay"

IvyTheTerrible

Hey baby, welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You.

Wossack

Mr. Burns: Oh, did I say 'corpse hatch?' I meant 'innocence tube!'



Disco Stu: Did you know that disco record sales were up 400% for the year ending 1976? If these trends continue.. ayyyyy!
Homer: Uh.. your fish are dead.
Disco Stu: Yeah, I know.. I, eh, can't get them out of there.

Busi_Girl08

"I had a cat named Snowball, SHE DIED, SHE DIED.
Mum said she was just sleeping, SHE LIED, SHE LIED.
Why oh why is my cat dead?
Why couldn't that Chrysler have hit me instead?"

Busi_Girl08

"Lisa. Do you find something funny about the word "tromboner?"
"Hehe, sorry sir. I was just laughing at something funny outside"
"She was looking at Nelson!"
"LISA LIKES NELSON!!"
"She does not!"
"MILHOUSE LIKES LISA!!"
"He does not!"
"JENNY LIKES MILHOUSE!"
"She does not!"
"ÚDER LIKES MILHOUSE!"
"NOONE LIKES MILHOUSE!!"

Creature

Mr. Burns your plant violates every labour law in the book, we found a missing Brazilian soccer team working in your reactor.

That plane crashed on MY property!

Sykk

What the hell is going on in here?!

Carroller16

“(Lisa) “I’m going to become a vegetarian” (Homer) “Does that mean you’re not going to eat any pork?” “Yes” “Bacon?” “Yes Dad” Ham?” “Dad all those meats come from the same animal” “Right Lisa, some wonderful, magical animal!”"

Homer falling down mountain
"Stupid Gravity. You used to be cool"

8-10

Mr. Burns: Well, did you meet Larry?
Yale Official 1: Oh, yes. He made light of my weight problem, then suggested my motto should be "semper fudge." At that point, he told me to "relax".
Mr. Burns: How were his test scores?
Yale Official 2: Let's just say this -- he spelled "Yale" with a "6."

Love this episode. Also:

Homer: (Speaking through a kazoo) Hello, Mr. Burns. This is the kidnapper. Do you miss your son?
Mr. Burns: Yes, I'm missing one son. Return it immediately!

xoxyx

KeithM89 wrote: »

Milhouse: I can’t go to juvie. They use guys like me as currency!

Yeah, they'll pass you around like... like currency, like you said.

IvyTheTerrible

Pepe: You are so learn-ed, Papa Homer

Homer: It's LEARNED, pepe, LEARNED.

cherryghost

Barney: Hello, my name is Barney Gumble, and I'm an alcoholic.

Lisa: Mr Gumble, this is a girl scouts meeting.

Barney: Is it, or is it you girls can't admit that you have a problem?

krudler

I love you Pepsi.
Pepi..
I love you Pepi.

funny moments that arent quotes:

Homer fighting Bart's new big brother in the aquarium, the sound of him cracking his back over the fire hydrant makes me wince and laugh every time I hear it

Ned pushing Homer out of the burning house onto the matress below, then the subsequent noise Homer makes as he's catapulted back into the house, simple, subtle, hilarious.

laurashambles

Lisa: Friends? These are my only friends! Grown-up nerds like Gore Vidal, and even he's kissed more boys than I ever will.
Marge: Girls, Lisa! Boys kiss girls!

cherryghost

Actually I like this one and it's from last season

Bart: So Dean Martin would show up at the last minute and do everything in just one take?

Homer: That's right.

Bart: But Wikipedia said he was "passionate about rehearsal".

Homer: Don't you worry about Wikipedia. We'll change it when we get home. We'll change a lot of things.

Sam Vimes

krudler wrote: »

Homer fighting Bart's new big brother in the aquarium, the sound of him cracking his back over the fire hydrant makes me wince and laugh every time I hear it

Followed by "this is even more painful than it looks"

krudler

Sam Vimes wrote: »

Followed by "this is even more painful than it looks"

*seeing Pepi out in the rain*

"sniff, i'll take him....do you have him in blonde?"

KnifeWRENCH

"Hello, my name is Mr. Snrub...and I come from......some place far away.....yes, that'll do....anyway, I say we invest that money back in the nuclear plant."

"I like the way Snrub thinks."

krudler

KnifeWRENCH wrote: »

"Hello, my name is Mr. Snrub...and I come from......some place far away.....yes, that'll do....anyway, I say we invest that money back in the nuclear plant."

"I like the way Snrub thinks."

I'm part of that facebook group

krudler

Garnish my celery?! what does that mean?!
Please Krusty, this is no time for jokes.
Whos joking?! awwwww I dont know what you're saying!