Those 'Oh God, I'm an Idiot' moments.

jester77

You would need to know Galway for this one, but I was getting a bus up from Limerick for a job interview, interview was due to take place in the Great Southern, I wasn't very familiar with the city at the time. I was half asleep on the way into the city, when I spotted the Corrib Great Southern on the way in and thought grand, that's where I have to go.

So the bus pulls into Eyre Square and I see the taxi rank at the top near Supermacs. I walk up and hop into the first taxi and get asked "where to?"

"Great Southern please". The look I got from him was priceless!

Ms. Captain M

elekid wrote: »

A couple of stories from junior infants, which make think what an idiot I was, even though it was kind of excusable at the time:

Someone in my class told me he saw the body of a whale washed up on a beach while on holidays. It took me years to figure out why he "only" saw its body and not its head as well.

That puzzled me for years as a child. I'd hear on the news "a body was found..." I couldn't understand why the arms, legs and head were always cut off.

Idjit

I remember once I was in an off license and I was feeling really arrogant because I had only recently turned 18 at that time and had just gotten my new ID. I swaggered up to the counter.bursting with confidence(I was completely sober by the way)and asked to buy a nagan of vodka. When yer man asked for my ID I handed him a card from the bunch in my wallet and waited. He took the card, squinted at it, looked back up at me(I was grinning like a madwoman) and said very slowly(as if I might be too stupid to understand): "This is your library card."

I was so embarrassed as I got out my actual ID while the people behind me waited. Never felt so stupid before or since!

AfterDusk

I know someone who was defrosting the freezer part of their fridge-freezer once - it was still plugged in so the fridge would work. It was going a bit slowly so she decides to speed up the process by boiling the kettle and putting it in. At this stage it was getting late though and before she went to bed, she closed the freezer door "to keep the heat in"................

Same girl came half way into a conversation that ended with "Keith Duffy? Isn't he the one who had the kid with Autism?" She asked who Autism was :pac:

Ericka89

I remember my friends were talking and one guy says "I got this cool torch in the 2 euro shop the other day." and the other says "Oh really? How much?"

I broke into tears of laughter.

The same guy asked. "Why does Hitman have a barcode on the back of his forehead? What is he a melon?"

and "How much is a 3.50 meal?"

fella is so absent minded sometimes, but it's hilarious.

Rubberlegs

When I first registered on Boards I never bothered with AH as I thought you were only allowed look at it late at night.....

stateofflux

applesock wrote: »

forgot to put a bra on one morning before work:mad:lol

trust me you are not an idiot...there is nothing idiotic about a braless day in work:pac:

Bob Z

Ericka89 wrote: »

I remember my friends were talking and one guy says "I got this cool torch in the 2 euro shop the other day." and the other says "Oh really? How much?"

I broke into tears of laughter.

The same guy asked. "Why does Hitman have a barcode on the back of his forehead? What is he a melon?"

and "How much is a 3.50 meal?"

fella is so absent minded sometimes, but it's hilarious.

But not everything in them shops are 2 euro

starlit

tripping on stairs/steps :eek:

Posy

snuggles285 wrote: »

tripping on stairs/steps :eek:

I hate that, especially if there's a witness. I could fall down a stairs/get hit by a bus/trip in the street and have numerous bruises/shattered spleen/broken bones and the only thing bothering me would be "oh, my God, did someone see that? I am MORTIFIED!" Especially those moments where you trip over nothing.

Hank Scorpio

I was fapping away to some high quality porn in my rented house today.

Had the earphones on and knowbody was at home, or so i thought!

Heard a knock on my door so it was absolute panic stations.

"Just a second" (Grab closest piece of clothing and wipe my hand)

Opened the door and got introducted to a new bloke staying here from france who stuck out his hand.

I just stuck out my left hand and kinda pulled his finger or something, it was really lol.

Then the land lord comes into the room and starts chatting to me with the beams of obvious **** sweat rolling down my embarassed face.

Ahhhhhhh bliss :mad:

starlit

Posy wrote: »

I hate that, especially if there's a witness. I could fall down a stairs/get hit by a bus/trip in the street and have numerous bruises/shattered spleen/broken bones and the only thing bothering me would be "oh, my God, did someone see that? I am MORTIFIED!" Especially those moments where you trip over nothing.

so true! but often burst out laughing if no body sees me!:o

Balfie

my mate one day in a restraunt, got asked how would he like his steak, his da had replied medium when asked, when it was my mates turn he replied extra large please

WIZE

Ms. Captain M wrote: »

That puzzled me for years as a child. I'd hear on the news "a body was found..." I couldn't understand why the arms, legs and head were always cut off.

God I did the same thing

except On the Radio you would hear on the news

Arms found in so and so ( Mostly in the 80s with the IRA & UVF) and I was always thinking Loads of people missing their arms

I took me a long time to figure out they wear talking about Guns

danniemcq

WIZE wrote: »

God I did the same thing

except On the Radio you would hear on the news

Arms found in so and so ( Mostly in the 80s with the IRA & UVF) and I was always thinking Loads of people missing their arms

I took me a long time to figure out they wear talking about Guns

I always found it funny that the reports from back in the trouble days that someone would be found in a back road with their hands tied behind their backa single gunshot to the head that the cops would treat it as suspicious

coolabula

When I was younger we were looking through the xmas TV guide to see what films were on, I noticed that the film "To Be Announced" was on quite a lot and mentioned this to my family, they all laughed for about 15 mins, took me ages to get it

Also when I used to bring my little boy out for a walk in his pram I used to forget we were walking and try to turn the indicators on whenever we were turning

Balfie

I have a couple, but 2 of the best ones are :

A friend 2 years ago at christmas was watching the late late toy show, and Pat Kenny had said "We have reports of an unidentified flying object being reported around Dublin at the moment, as far as we can tell, it is long and has a red light at the very top of it", so my mate ran out into the garden looking all over the place for this "UFO" then copped on that he was telling everyone it was Santa and his reindear......

another was, my mate walking thru town, and was stopped by one of these concern people, he was walking wearing a big red Spain Jacket, and he is tall and really tanned, pure Dub, so he said "me speaka no englasio" the woman then asked, "where are u from?" to which he said "me eeeehh from ehh Espana" pointing at the jacket, she then starts talking to him in fluent spanish, he hasnt a clue and has to leg it off,....:D


another was in McDonalds wit a guy i knew, der was a "foreign" person serving behind the counter, had asked the bloke, "have here or take away" his reply was "coke please" :D

fatherted1969

When I was younger we were looking through the xmas TV guide to see what films were on, I noticed that the film "To Be Announced" was on quite a lot and mentioned this to my family, they all laughed for about 15 mins, took me ages to get it



I used to think something lie that at that at football games as well. Who the hell is AN other and what club does he play for

Balfie

sitting in a pub in Dublin, a mate pipes out of no where "can we get the plane to Waterford??"

NothingMan

Balfie wrote: »

sitting in a pub in Dublin, a mate pipes out of no where "can we get the plane to Waterford??"

So you being more intelligent replied, yes, of course you can.

http://www.aerarann.com/

Edit: Nevermind, only if you're coming from the UK.

danniemcq

I just made a cup of tea in the canteen and thought the flask in front of the milk was milk it was coffee. Now i have tea that tastes of coffee

Balfie

NothingMan wrote: »

So you being more intelligent replied, yes, of course you can.

http://www.aerarann.com/

Edit: Nevermind, only if you're coming from the UK.

dont ya really just hate when something like that backfires on ya!!, thats a post in its self just for u, congratulations,

NothingMan

Balfie wrote: »

dont ya really just hate when something like that backfires on ya!!, thats a post in its self just for u, congratulations,

Well I knew Waterford had an airport, that gets me some points right?.......right....:o

Balfie

NothingMan wrote: »

Well I knew Waterford had an airport, that gets me some points right?.......right....:o

haha yeh that can get ya some points since it made me chuckle haha! :D

sealgaire

MrStuffins wrote: »

As if Drink Driving was safer in the 70s or something!

"It was only around the corner" is of no consolation to the people mown down and killed by people who have been killed by idiots using this very excuse.

Sorry for being all serious in AH, but this comment kinda riled me!

Ah come off it. Drink driving was common as muck back then. He is not condoning it, just saying how it was

ChallengerDeep

I put a teabag into my mug and went to pour hot water over it, but I poured tea from the teapot into it instead. I was wondering why it tasted so strong.

Rubberlegs

My daughter had an idiotic moment yesterday:). Listening to radio in car and the newsreader said that some celebrity had announced the birth of their baby via twitter. She turns to me and says " Jesus what kind of a name is that??". She's her mother's daughter:D

OutlawPete

Waiting weeks to see The Matrix which was on tonight.

In the queue, five minutes before screen time, I realise I left my wallet at home.

/I hate my idiot self

Duddy

Taxi Firm: Hello XX Cabs?
Me: Hello can I order for delivery please?
Taxi Firm: .....
Me *Hangs up in panic*

we'llallhavetea_old

fell on me arse in the snow today, the dog thought it was a game and starting leapin up on top of me. i don't think anyone saw...