Bipolar Disorder ask a question/discussion thread

nesf

nesf wrote: »

Have had 2 hours sleep in the last 48. No longer feel high but everyone around me tells me that I still am. Thursday can't come soon enough!

What's on Thursday? If others are saying you are high, then you deffo are. How long do your highs normally last and have you ever put together a plan of how to deal with it?

nesf

Deleted User wrote: »

What's on Thursday? If others are saying you are high, then you deffo are. How long do your highs normally last and have you ever put together a plan of how to deal with it?

Thursday is my appointment with my psychiatrist.

Plan is to last it out til then and try to keep a lid on the grandiose thinking. I haven't been this high in 9 years. Last time I got this bad I stayed this way for a good long while, went into a dysphoric mania and became very paranoid. Thus why I'm happy about Thursday.

Although honestly the physical exhaustion is beginning to sink in. This may be an unpleasant few days from this point on. Still feel great though despite this, wired but tired as they say.

Edit: Oh and the elation has returned. I'd forgotten how much I loved this early part of the highs.

Edit 2: Unpleasant high now, I'm praying the sedating drugs work on me tonight even for just a short while. No sleep just makes things so much worse for me!

nesf

6 hours sleep, yah! It makes a nice change to the 18 hours of pacing yesterday.

nesf

It's a mixed episode. On Rivotril and Zimovane now short term to try and bring me down. If that doesn't work it's off to hospital for me. Right now am just in a high so I'm giggling about it all. :P

nesf

This Rivotril might as well be Tic Tacs for all the calming effect it's having on me. It might be taking the edge of slightly but I'm spending my time either pacing or sitting in a chair with my legs twitching constantly, mostly the former.

Hopefully it takes a few days to build up a therapeutic dose in the blood or something. All I know it that over 2 hours after taking it my wife is commenting that I'm pacing/twitching constantly and talking fast. I feel in great form though, so it could be a lot worse I suppose!

sam34

ironmaiden, no diagnosing please.

nesf

Have gone from high and twitchy this morning to low and sluggish this evening. Have I ever mentioned how much I hate mixed episodes?

nesf

The damn Zopiclone isn't kicking in tonight, 2 hours of lying in bed restless and unable to sleep. I've a psych evaluation about whether I need to go into hospital tomorrow, I'm not going to be in a good state for it.

nesf

nesf wrote: »

The damn Zopiclone isn't kicking in tonight, 2 hours of lying in bed restless and unable to sleep. I've a psych evaluation about whether I need to go into hospital tomorrow, I'm not going to be in a good state for it.

Good luck with the evaluation. What hospital would you be going to? I hope you have Health Insurance cos there are some hospitals that make your stay a lot more comfortable...

nesf

Deleted User wrote: »

Good luck with the evaluation. What hospital would you be going to? I hope you have Health Insurance cos there are some hospitals that make your stay a lot more comfortable...

It'd be St. Pats. I've been there before and it's fine. The evaluation went fine, I've improved over the last week, now they're going to try and stabilise me over the next 2-3 weeks and if that doesn't work then I'll be going into hospital for a while to get this episode sorted. I'm happy enough with this plan.

nesf

Pretty bad agitation there for a nice while, caught it early though and 1mg of Rivotril took the edge off and I'm able to sit down now and not pace so hard that my back and legs start to hurt. Had a bit of a crash there after the "high" so now feeling hopeless and worthless etc. Every day is a rollercoaster at the moment mood/energy/agitation wise.

Hopefully the increase to 15mg of Abilify will help settle things down a bit.

Odysseus

nesf wrote: »

Pretty bad agitation there for a nice while, caught it early though and 1mg of Rivotril took the edge off and I'm able to sit down now and not pace so hard that my back and legs start to hurt. Had a bit of a crash there after the "high" so now feeling hopeless and worthless etc. Every day is a rollercoaster at the moment mood/energy/agitation wise.

Hopefully the increase to 15mg of Abilify will help settle things down a bit.

Jesus mate, you really are having a few bad weeks. Not a lot I can say, but as I always find your post insightful I just feel the need to say something. I really hope the meds kick in soon for mate. At least you know how to look after yourself when your unwell this. Hope it gets better soon.

nesf

Odysseus wrote: »

Jesus mate, you really are having a few bad weeks. Not a lot I can say, but as I always find your post insightful I just feel the need to say something. I really hope the meds kick in soon for mate. At least you know how to look after yourself when your unwell this. Hope it gets better soon.

Thanks, the Rivotril has kicked in fully now so I'm somewhat zoned out. Legs still twitching but I'm not bothered by it. My son is having his birthday party this evening at a play centre but there's no way I could face the public like this at the moment. I can barely stand to see family see me like this etc.

Odysseus

nesf wrote: »

Thanks, the Rivotril has kicked in fully now so I'm somewhat zoned out. Legs still twitching but I'm not bothered by it. My son is having his birthday party this evening at a play centre but there's no way I could face the public like this at the moment. I can barely stand to see family see me like this etc.

You can make it up to your son when your better, you need to focus on you now, but you know that and you are doing it.

nesf

Odysseus wrote: »

You can make it up to your son when your better, you need to focus on you now, but you know that and you are doing it.

Yeah, I know, it still sucks though. :P

nesf

Ritovil wears off, bad agitation returns, more Ritovil taken, now in an unpleasant high.

Just can't catch a break today at all.

Humans eh!

Hello S, been following this thread from the start, I will ring you before the weekend is out.
-M

nesf

Humans eh! wrote: »

Hello S, been following this thread from the start, I will ring you before the weekend is out.
-M

You think I'm someone else.

nesf

Bad agitated patch there, my hands were drumming out random patterns compulsively on the table (what is this?) and I couldn't type properly. Lasted about a half hour. A side effect of the increased Abilify dose or just manic related agitation? I'm very confused.

nesf

Damn insomnia despite the sleeping tablet. I'm going to give the zopiclone another half hour to kick in (it's had an hour so far) before I resort to taking some Rivotril for extra sedation. If I don't get sleep tonight I''ll be in a very high and bad state tomorrow.

Gremlinertia

@ nesf; how did yesterday go? As for the mixed moods and sleeplessness i'm having a week of it too. Just waiting and waiting for things to return to a more 'even keel' hope it does soon, can't keep up the candle burning at both ends. Recently tried on low dose of serequel, have adapted scarily quickly to it though, so waiting on whenever next hospital appointment is, though if i up dosage much it'll interfere with work, and i have to work. Hope things level for you soon.

Grem

nesf

Got to sleep thankfully at 5am. More changes to drugs now, more sedatives to try and get me a good night's sleep each night etc.

Gremlinertia

Just got a letter for my next psych app, not until end of august. Back to doc i go i suppose. Surely there should be more monitoring when on these drugs? Ah well..

nesf

That sucks Grem.


Apparently 1mg of Rivotril + 7.5 mg Zopiclone = 2 hours of sleep for me at the moment. o_O

bob50

nesf wrote: »

That sucks Grem.


Apparently 1mg of Rivotril + 7.5 mg Zopiclone = 2 hours of sleep for me at the moment. o_O

Hi Nesf ive been down the road your experincing at the moment

its terrible trying trying too sleep and hoping you will Can your doc change what your on ?


Best of luck with the meds & hopefully you will get some sleep

nesf

bob50 wrote: »

Hi Nesf ive been down the road your experincing at the moment

its terrible trying trying too sleep and hoping you will Can your doc change what your on ?


Best of luck with the meds & hopefully you will get some sleep

Thanks Bob. It was just changed today to try and get me to sleep tonight.

flyswatter

What keeps you up nesf? Is it your mind racing with negative thoughts?

nesf

flyswatter wrote: »

What keeps you up nesf? Is it your mind racing with negative thoughts?

Just a really active mind. A need to do be doing *something* and so on. Whether the thoughts are negative or not varies from day to day.

nesf

Music feels like it was written especially for me.

(Yes, I know this isn't true )

What are you listening to?