Why do men do it?

OutlawPete

southsiderosie wrote: »

Read the original post. She deliberately changed her wardrobe so as not to attract undue attention..

Thaedydal wrote: »

They don't care.

Your confusing AH with the Cuckoo's Nest.

Thaedydal wrote: »

Your not playing along and being the type of "game gal" the ah posters prefer so you go from being perved on / flirted with to being defective.

Yeah, be a good 'gal' OP and go get me a beer :rolleyes:

Thaedydal wrote: »

Ah is not s serious forum expect when it suits the poster to want to discuss things here rather then going to another forum,

So the OP is NOT a 'poster'? Or do you mean a regular?

Thaedydal wrote: »

those types of comments would not be allowed in the ladies lounge, personal issues

No, and you wanna know why? Cause those two places pander to people like some of the women that have posted comments on this thread and just for the record I am not refering to the OP when I say that.

Your post says nothing about the sexist disgracful comments that have been left by the girls here, why?

I have never posted on PI or TLL but I have lurked and women get away with saying the most outrageous bullcrap over there and if any man so much as dare suggest a woman is wrong then he gets reprimanded.

Thaedydal wrote: »

But read the first post they knew well it was AH and the tone of the post about sure he's a nice lad we get on well all convey that she's not a frigid wagon ( who uses the quare notion of professional conduct in the work place to make life miserable for men cos she's too ugly to get any )

Chip on shoulder, much?

Thaedydal wrote: »

Que all the posts about how most guys like boobs, hurrah fun bags,
despite trying to reach out to the posters this thread has just turned into
utter titalation

Your lumping everyone that posted on this thread in one ball cause it it suits your argument. Sure, there have some comments that been a little childish, but it is AH as you so graciously pointed out, and so can't you just filter those posts out and try and make comments on the serious points that have been made here - or is that too much to ask?

Thaedydal wrote: »

or try and tell the poster she should consider it a compliment despite the fact it is unprofessional, can be considered sexual harrashment in the work place and she has already gone to efforts to change her manner of dress in the work place.

I see what you are doing here. Your trying to give the impression that all the comments made have been directed at the OP when they were NOT!! Good try though.

Thaedydal wrote: »

Sure their bweebs reflect the mentality that it's a mans world and why should they make an effort to stop looking and restrain themself and deny themsleves that bit of perky pleasure in the office despite the fact it is
having a negative impact on thier co worker.

So men think it's a 'Man's World' do we? That's our mentality?

No, that's what YOU think.

Thaedydal wrote: »

Is it a man's world? Damn right it is if you can get to stare at enough boobage and get paid for it.

Yes, just got a cheque today for staring at boobs all last week. I love Planet Earth.

Thaedydal wrote: »

This is the expected carry on in AH, all you can do is ignore the forum

Yeah, good for you.

The thing that pisses you off is that the nonsesnsical comments that were posted here by the women got called out for being a load of self pitying bulls*it (and again I am NOT refering to the OP).

Thaedydal wrote: »

or report posts ( which had mods and cat mod go /shrug it's AH ),

The only posts I have seen on this thread that NEEDED reporting (but WERE NOT - as far as I know at least) were posts by WOMEN!

I was called an "Idiot", "Sweetie" and told that 'I deserved to have my daughters leered at as they walked to school.

Would THAT have been allowed in PI or TLL??
it
Just for the record, I would prefer if the mods here DIDN'T step in and I hinted as much in the thread as I like it when we really see the nasty side of people, as it reveals them to be the charmless personality deficient pieces of work that they really are.

Thaedydal wrote: »

or try and posted in a limited fashion and ignore the reek such sexism cos apprently it's fun.

I hope your addressing the women with that comment. Especially the 'men are perverts' and 'sleazy' sexist comments etc etc

Thaedydal wrote: »

Yeah I am going back to the more serious forums now,

The 'serious forums' were women like you (sadly there are more) get away with spouting crap about men all day and don't get called for it.

Forums where you can wallow in your self pity self and pretend that it's so much harder to be a woman in today's society because of the big bad man bastards.

Thaedydal wrote: »

like I was told last week cos apprently I am a buzzwrecker

It's not my buzz your wrecking.

Thaedydal wrote: »

lads should cop on in work and not stare at them and make co workers feel uncomfy.

Eh yeah, most guys here agree with thatm but you keep telling yourself that we don't, if that's what makes you happy.

norrie rugger

tbh wrote: »

also, even if he is staring, bear in mind the concept of default hot

Like the plain female teacher, in an all boy school becomes the image of womanhood

norrie rugger

Fratton Fred wrote: »

i still laugh like a schoolboy when i tye 80085 or 55378008 into a calculator

i prefer 81680085

orourkeda

I Love tits

Porkpie

Where's the OP and her boobies gone? This thread has gone t!ts up.

Liam Byrne

southsiderosie wrote: »

Wow, so being told over 200 posts that women should just accept that men will stare at their breasts - oh, excuse me, tits - even though it makes them uncomfortable is not incorrect and/or patronizing? Take a look at the posts I was responding to - they were unbelievably crude and sexist.

I'd actually be 100% behind you in relation to some of the juvenile posts WERE IT NOT FOR THE FACT that the title of the thread is 100% sexist in itself!!!!!

I've already asked the OP why they chose to bundle all men together (100% sexist) and I can guarantee that if someone posted a thread title "Why are women bitches ?" that someone of the comments would be a combination of seriously barbed and OTT tongue-in-cheek.

Now, if the OP had said "why does he do it ?", there probably would have been a different discussion entirely; but we'll never know.

So basically, the gauntlet was thrown by the original sexist phrasing of the title; if you read back I don't agree with this approach, but if that's the approach that the OP chose to take, then it's understandable that people would react accordingly.

j1974

Orlaithc9 wrote: »

This is probably in the wrong section but I figured if I need answers the good people in After Hours are the ones to ask.

So...theres a guy in work I get on with very well. We are both in our mid - late 20s. We work very well together and have a laugh. Hes married by the way so anything more than that is a no no plus Im in a very loving committed relationship myself.

However, he stares at my chest alot...Its not all the time but its quite frequently. It goes to the point where I know hes doing it and I look up and catch him and he knows I catch him and he quickly removes his eyes and looks away and theres like a milli-moment of silence before we start talking again. But its really embarrassing for both me and him.

Ive noted not to wearing clingy tops and low cut stuff and he still does it.

Seriously, what do I do? I mean do I just say it to him or make a joke outta it or ask him nicely to stop?
Ok its nice to be admired or feel a suggestion that someone might like the shape of my body or my looks but this is a bit...i dunno...uncomfortable.

Can you tell me whats going on in his head, I mean he has a wife with a pair of her own? Why look at mine? Why put us both in the situation of being really embarrassed?

ah come on, iare you fishing for compliments or just quite young and naive. we love breasts, simple as. men have no boundries in this area, we will stare at our cousins boobs, our sisters boobs, anyones actually. it's a built in instinctive thing our bodies natuarally do. so dont ever feel offended here by this. the real question here is one of tact!!! I quote jerry seinfeld on free cleavage, "checking out free cleavage, is like staring directly at the sun!! you just glance every now and again at it but beware, if you stare, then you could get burned"!!! just ask'em next time "do you have a fascination with my shirts?? I can only assume you do, since you regularly check mine out??? or is it what's behind them I wonder, you dirty perve!! say this whilst laughing but let him know just the same. you said you get on well enough, so either you say something or you continue to go on feeling icky!!!!:o

and I'm sure I speak for all the lads on this thread when I ask with utmost sincerity and a total respect to you as an equal, please send us a BLOODY PIC fo yer boobs!!

jimmyw

When I am talking to a lady I look her straight in the eye and dont even notice anything from that down.................










:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:

























Sorry dont know what happened there !!;)

j1974

To_be_confirmed wrote: »

Meh. Men can and do glance at chests on a frequent basis. Now, that doesn't mean that he has to look at it while talking to you either. That's indiscreet.

Then again, sometimes my eyes would look downwards simply so that I was not staring into someone's face for several minutes non stop. Not to catch a glimpse of what bra a girl's wearing etc!

I think some women fail to get that men can admire attributes about women e.g. their figure, their chest, and they will look briefly but it's not exactly suggesting burning desire or in your words, "sexual intent".

I also think your reason for being uncomfortable is not fully truthful as I expect you'd feel the same outside of work etc. Besides, why the hell would being in work make your breasts less attractive?! I think you'll have to become a bit more comfortable with the way that men, while not even fancying you, may still you look at you like that for a moment. How do you find being around men in general? Are many of your friends male?

But this forum really has far more men than women on it. I might ask a couple of my female friends what they think of men making sneaky glances as them or their bits, so to speak.

very well said To be confirmed. youre very frank and honest, I think It would be quite something to know you in private

j1974

To_be_confirmed wrote: »

Meh. Men can and do glance at chests on a frequent basis. Now, that doesn't mean that he has to look at it while talking to you either. That's indiscreet.

Then again, sometimes my eyes would look downwards simply so that I was not staring into someone's face for several minutes non stop. Not to catch a glimpse of what bra a girl's wearing etc!

I think some women fail to get that men can admire attributes about women e.g. their figure, their chest, and they will look briefly but it's not exactly suggesting burning desire or in your words, "sexual intent".

I also think your reason for being uncomfortable is not fully truthful as I expect you'd feel the same outside of work etc. Besides, why the hell would being in work make your breasts less attractive?! I think you'll have to become a bit more comfortable with the way that men, while not even fancying you, may still you look at you like that for a moment. How do you find being around men in general? Are many of your friends male?

But this forum really has far more men than women on it. I might ask a couple of my female friends what they think of men making sneaky glances as them or their bits, so to speak.

very well put "to be confirmed". It's nice to hear a womans perspective for a change and a very intelligent one might I add!!!

You're very frank you know that?? I think it would be quite something to know you in private life. you fly now agent starling, fly fly!!!!!! all the wayyyy tooo the FFFFFFFF.BBBBBBBBBBB.IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIi:D

NothingMan

j1974 wrote: »

we love breasts, simple as. men have no boundries in this area, we will stare at our cousins boobs, our sisters boobs, anyones actually. it's a built in instinctive thing our bodies natuarally do.

:eek: Speak for yourself J, I love my sisters and all but obviously not in the same way you love your sisters.

brumbrum

I sometimes look at this girl in work because she is beautiful(as a person too). I tend to look at her belly more but I am belly guy. Now it probabley makes her feel a bit uncomfortable but she is beautiful as I said. I will stop looking but it will be hard (no jokes please! since I said that everyone will joke about it!) because of what you said.

Just say it to him if you're friends in a joking kind of way, like others have suggested and he will get a bit embarressed and stop. Or try highlight it to him by saying I dont like the way X(some other randomer) stares at my boobs and I notice it or something less obvious.

j1974

j1974 wrote: »

ah come on, iare you fishing for compliments or just quite young and naive. we love breasts, simple as. men have no boundries in this area, we will stare at our cousins boobs, our sisters boobs, anyones actually. it's a built in instinctive thing our bodies natuarally do. so dont ever feel offended here by this. the real question here is one of tact!!! I quote jerry seinfeld on free cleavage, "checking out free cleavage, is like staring directly at the sun!! you just glance every now and again at it but beware, if you stare, then you could get burned"!!! just ask'em next time "do you have a fascination with my shirts?? I can only assume you do, since you regularly check mine out??? or is it what's behind them I wonder, you dirty perve!! say this whilst laughing but let him know just the same. you said you get on well enough, so either you say something or you continue to go on feeling icky!!!!:o

and I'm sure I speak for all the lads on this thread when I ask with utmost sincerity and a total respect to you as an equal, please send us a BLOODY PIC fo yer boobs!!

FYI, we have all at some stage caught sight of even our sisters boobs unfortunatley and said, eh up!! where'd they come from!! ah ha ha

thats as far as it goes on the sister thing ok, im being honest not garry glitter!!! any man who denies stuff like that is a liar so dont bother posting, cause we wont believe you!! same goes for mothes friends, aunties, friends mothers, sisters and yes cousins!!! this is nothing any stand up comic wont freely admit!!!:D

WindSock

My god there really are a lot of socially retarded people in this thread. I hope it's not representative of the country.

To recap what I said earlier;

-Glancing is NOT the same as staring. Or looking constantly. Practise some self control.

-The workplace is not somewhere where people like to go to feel sexualised.

-How can you tell someone that you are not making them uncomfortable? How arrogant!

j1974

NothingMan wrote: »

:eek: Speak for yourself J, I love my sisters and all but obviously not in the same way you love your sisters.

relax nothing man, see my response on below post. And i dont have sisters, I have a sister!! sadly she was taken by social services, something about sexual deviance and canbalistic tendencies!! at least that's what the docs chart on me read!!

have a sense of humour nowhere man!! or you'll end up on the socail fringe, in the middle of "nowwhere mannnn";)

NothingMan

j1974 wrote: »

we will stare at our cousins boobs, our sisters boobs, anyones actually.

I didn't say I never saw my sisters breasts (My sisters have breasts, other girls have boobs) But I certainly never stared at them.

thats as far as it goes on the sister thing ok, im being honest not garry glitter!!! any man who denies stuff like that is a liar so dont bother posting, cause we wont believe you!! same goes for mothes friends, aunties, friends mothers, sisters and yes cousins!!! this is nothing any stand up comic wont freely admit!!!:D

I didn't realise all stand up comics were incestuous sister lovers, but I always had my suspicion about Brendan Grace, there's something seedy about that man.

I have a sister!! sadly she was taken by social services, something about sexual deviance and canbalistic tendencies!! at least that's what the docs chart on me read!!

I think there should be a bigger line drawn through sexually deviant and cannaballistic. Doctors never really got the meaning of the phrase eating out.

j1974

NothingMan wrote: »

I didn't say I never saw my sisters breasts (My sisters have breasts, other girls have boobs) But I certainly never stared at them.



I didn't realise all stand up comics were incestuous sister lovers, but I always had my suspicion about Brendan Grace, there's something seedy about that man.



I think there should be a bigger line drawn through sexually deviant and cannaballistic. Doctors never really got the meaning of the phrase eating out.

ahhhh finally the humourous side is seen. Ive never ment this girl but maybe she's making mountains out of her molehills!!!! ha ha ha ha h ha

c'mon now that was damn :)funny!!!!

NothingMan

j1974 wrote: »

ahhhh finally the humourous side is seen. Ive never ment this girl but maybe she's making mountains out of her molehills!!!! ha ha ha ha h ha

c'mon now that was damn :)funny!!!!

Sorry J, unfortunately saying how funny your own joke is makes it immediately not funny.

JimmyJoyce

maddogcollins wrote: »

Tell him to "take a picture, it will last longer"..that will embarass him and get your point across

or maybe you should take a picture of your bare boobs and hand it to him - he gets to see what he wants and probably will also get your point - everyone wins!:D

norrie rugger

JimmyJoyce wrote: »

or maybe you should take a picture of your bare boobs and hand it to him - he gets to see what he wants and probably will also get your point - everyone wins!:D

what about us huh? what.about.us?

Nevyn

OutlawPete wrote: »

Your confusing AH with the Cuckoo's Nest.

Nope

OutlawPete wrote: »

Yeah, be a good 'gal' OP and go get me a beer :rolleyes:

If ever you are in the bar thread in BGRH I will be glad to.

OutlawPete wrote: »

No, and you wanna know why? Cause those two places pander to people like some of the women that have posted comments on this thread and just for the record I am not refering to the OP when I say that.

Your post says nothing about the sexist disgracful comments that have been left by the girls here, why?

Cos I haven't' gotten around to them cos I left the house, if you find those posts so objectionable did you report them?

OutlawPete wrote: »

I have never posted on PI or TLL but I have lurked and women get away with saying the most outrageous bullcrap over there and if any man so much as dare suggest a woman is wrong then he gets reprimanded.

I have stood up for guys then things get to polarized over and and in various other forum but there are two sides to every story.

OutlawPete wrote: »

Chip on shoulder, much?

Nope, but sure I would have to have wouldn't I cos I can't be a happy reasonable person and have such views.

OutlawPete wrote: »

Your lumping everyone that posted on this thread in one ball cause it it suits your argument. Sure, there have some comments that been a little childish, but it is AH as you so graciously pointed out, and so can't you just filter those posts out and try and make comments on the serious points that have been made here - or is that too much to ask?

My post was in response to the person I quoted and was explain how things tend to run in this forum and pointing out other places which do not suffer from the types of posts she found objectionable.

OutlawPete wrote: »

So men think it's a 'Man's World' do we? That's our mentality?

Nope they don't, if men did then even some of the time think that then it would be a lot easier to point out some of the discrimination and double standards, they exist for men as well and both genders need to look at them
so we can all progress and have better lives, but that starts with questioning behavior and standards.

OutlawPete wrote: »

No, that's what YOU think.

Darling you don't know what I think on a range of things so please don't presume.

OutlawPete wrote: »

Yes, just got a cheque today for staring at boobs all last week. I love Planet Earth.

Cool whats your job, cos I would not mind being a boob inspector myself.

OutlawPete wrote: »

The thing that pisses you off is that the nonsesnsical comments that were posted here by the women got called out for being a load of self pitying bulls*it (and again I am NOT refering to the OP).

Nope, what pisses me off is that a lot of the posts in this thread are permissive of the troubling behaviour and dismissive of how it impacts on people in the work place.

People are expected to be professional in work and not sexualise the workplace be it a guy who needs to cop on and not stare at boobs or a woman who passes needless and out of order remarks about guys bums.

Threads like these stop people from coming forward when this happens to them as it's seen as a non issue when it it.

OutlawPete wrote: »

The only posts I have seen on this thread that NEEDED reporting (but WERE NOT - as far as I know at least) were posts by WOMEN!

Did you report them?
If the mods didn't act on the reported posts did you pm the catmod?

I was called an "Idiot", "Sweetie" and told that 'I deserved to have my daughters leered at as they walked to school.

OutlawPete wrote: »

Would THAT have been allowed in PI or TLL??

nope

OutlawPete wrote: »

Just for the record, I would prefer if the mods here DIDN'T step in and I hinted as much in the thread as I like it when we really see the nasty side of people, as it reveals them to be the charmless personality deficient pieces of work that they really are.

So you think those posts are out of line and not acceptable and sexist but you don't want to do anything about them, cos they make you feel superior to those people? charming.

OutlawPete wrote: »

I hope your addressing the women with that comment. Especially the 'men are perverts' and 'sleazy' sexist comments etc etc

I always refute the rubbish that all men are perverts or sleazy or potential rapists, it's bull **** and as ever a few idiots who are out of order but when other men don't stand up and tell them to cop on it's like they are silently backing up for endorsing that behaviour.

I don't agree with sexism from either gender.

OutlawPete wrote: »

The 'serious forums' were women like you (sadly there are more) get away with spouting crap about men all day and don't get called for it.

My that is a very large brush you are taring people with, there are not many if any women like me, you go from roaring wide sweeping sterotyping of men and then turn around and do the same about a across section of women,
hypercritical much?

OutlawPete wrote: »

Forums where you can wallow in your self pity self and pretend that it's so much harder to be a woman in today's society because of the big bad man bastards.

Actually I think it's harder to be who I am and the type of women I want to be in today's society due to other women rather then the mythical oppressing man.

OutlawPete wrote: »

Eh yeah, most guys here agree with thatm but you keep telling yourself that we don't, if that's what makes you happy.

Thatch wonderful but you'd not know that by the amount of them posting that, but it's nice that you are concerned with my happiness that's very caring of you.

Dempsey

You have a nice rack. Dont be upset by that fact :pac:

Have you ever been not hungry or no intention of eating and looked at a menu at the entrance of a restaurant and not go in?

DOC09UNAM

You're sexist.

j1974

NothingMan wrote: »

Sorry J, unfortunately saying how funny your own joke is makes it immediately not funny.

nothing man, you should change that to "I laff at nothingman". "Acknowledging that ones own punchline is bordering on the outermost edge of humourous, is in my eyes somewhat conceited and thus defeats the purpose of said proverbial rib tickler!!! tut tut tut. go back to playing scrabble and dungeons and dragons. itsssss christmaaaaaasssssssss

opinion guy

OutlawPete wrote: »

No, and you wanna know why? Cause those two places pander to people like some of the women that have posted comments on this thread and just for the record I am not refering to the OP when I say that.
........
I have never posted on PI or TLL but I have lurked and women get away with saying the most outrageous bullcrap over there and if any man so much as dare suggest a woman is wrong then he gets reprimanded.

I've post alot in PI/RI and I have to say that this is not true. It is in general very fair and balanced over there and people are trying to help the thread starters in general. It might have been a better place for this thread. I've posted a little on tLL - I tend not to post too much since it is the ladies lounge after all, but when I do post its usually to provide a male perspective on something or to counterbalance comments I feel are biased against men and I have found that usually the ladies welcome a thoughtful male opinion and take it constructively

Dempsey

DOC09UNAM wrote: »

You're sexist.

Me?

DOC09UNAM

Dempsey wrote: »

Me?

Nah i was aiming for the woman before me, but you snuck in like a ninja just before me.

Liam Byrne

opinion guy wrote: »

posted a little on tLL - I tend not to post too much since it is the ladies lounge after all

Actually, a thought has just struck me - isn't the whole concept of TLL a bit sexist in itself ?

Is there TML in existence ?

EDIT : just spotted this for the first time.

aaronjumper

A lot of anger in here.

*Cautiously steps away from thread*

Nevyn

There is The Gentleman's Club which you will find here
http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=1136