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Talk About Your Relationships Here
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The same guy (probably) recently asked me if I'd started the college course that I applied for when we were going out, and when I said yes I had, he said "Oh good, I'd feel so bad if you were so upset over breaking up with me that you gave up on college".
oh god please say that was a joke?
i feel much better reading this thread. being told they dont consider me a ex gf even though we spent more time together then his only other ex did (and got up to come then kissing) stung alot and made me feel like a piece of meat. but he's still single after nearly two years and im in a loving relationship for a year and a half so yay.
oh yeah and a month after being together he rings me to recite a poem he had just written about a girl 4 years before he loved from afar (ie. a love poem) but he said before he read it it was for a competition and he never wrote about anything else before and thats why he stuck to THAT theme. :rolleyes: i should have dumped him then. first bf though, low self esteem ect0 -
Oh good for you Spin! Am delighted you found happiness! My ex constantly went on about his exes. They were all wonderful and he adored them all and yet he was still single at 40. I wasn't wonderful though. He used to show me photos of them and deliberately wind me up about them and other women. I should have dumped him then.
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yikes! :O
jaysus, kazobel, you really have had it rough, haven't you?!
damn, im so sorry about that, it's one thing losing a lover, a whole other losing a kid
I'm learning how people think tbh, my girlfriend now has two kids, one has Down syndrome and their dad left the day she was born because he seen her as a flaw. She doesn't recognise him at all because she has limited face recognition abilities (she can hold 5 people in at a time) but sees me as her other parent and I'm happy to be that person for her so I like to think that maybe all the **** was to lead me to her where she'd have someone that really does love her as opposed to the fake **** her dad gives, he's even asked for my girlfriends 5 year old on her own and not have to take the baby on the days he has access 0 -
spinandscribble wrote: »oh god please say that was a joke?
It'd be nice to think it was a joke... Other things he used to do would suggest otherwise though.. including, when we were going out, going on and on (and on and on and on) about how much he had loved his ex and how much he was never going to be in love with me... It's a mystery why I put up with him for as long as I did. In my defence, he was a great ride. But not much else
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Oh good for you Spin! Am delighted you found happiness! My ex constantly went on about his exes. They were all wonderful and he adored them all and yet he was still single at 40. I wasn't wonderful though. He used to show me photos of them and deliberately wind me up about them and other women. I should have dumped him then.
i bet you became wonderful after though :rolleyes: thats how these guys are. they never want someone when they can have them. that ex only ever feels for women that dont want him. the sad bit is he still trys to make me jealous by going on and on about girls. we're friends so i expect him to talk about that but the extent to which he goes on is a bit OTT or maybe thats just his way.0 -
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I'm learning how people think tbh, my girlfriend now has two kids, one has Down syndrome and their dad left the day she was born because he seen her as a flaw. She doesn't recognise him at all because she has limited face recognition abilities (she can hold 5 people in at a time) but sees me as her other parent and I'm happy to be that person for her so I like to think that maybe all the **** was to lead me to her where she'd have someone that really does love her as opposed to the fake **** her dad gives, he's even asked for my girlfriends 5 year old on her own and not have to take the baby on the days he has access
ha, i do recall when i was younger and going through a lot of really really bad ****, an adult who took an interest in my case used to say a lot that she believes everything happens for a reason. and i used to think that was pure bull****... and now... looking at where i am and how happy i am, and where i was , and how i could never have gotten here if it wasnt for the bad ****...
i think she was right. life is a strange piece of fish.0 -
ours was about me feeling paranoid about his flirting and his throw away jokey comments *i hate you lol* ect. eventually i realised he didnt care for me and i was going throught a bad time at home so going stand it. i was coming from dublin and i met a guy on a train who was nice to me and made me realise i deserved more. i talked to him as a unbiased opinion on the way back home on the train. it cleared my mind and i decided to dump my bf. it wasnt going anywhere and was making us both miserable.
i accidently bumped into the train fella then next day and while we spent some time together after the break up, it didnt work out but thats another story. 0 -
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Clare Bear wrote: »A FOOKING EEJIT!!!!!!!!!
Agreed!
Hope you two girlies are doing ok today, men who needs em 0 -
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We cut all contact when we were both invited to a mutual friend's wedding (more my friend than his, hence him being surprised he got an invite). He text me, referring to the wedding invite, saying 'guess what I got?'. I replied 'several STIs?' and that was pretty much that.
oh oh *bows*
yeah nothing hurts a scumbag more then STI jokes, but thats usually because deep down they're scared too. otherwise they'd laugh it off 0 -
woke up to a text saying he was breakin up with me
blamed me for the break up
got engaged
begged me to get back with him
got married and got the lady pregnent
all within the space of 3 months.
likes to spread nice rumours about me still.... (this was 2 years ago now!!)
she was my best friend.......
The flippin fools - her and him... Are they still together? Was she so stupid to think if he did it to you he wouldnt do it to her????
They deserve each other.. 0 -
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Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,074 Mod ✭✭✭✭
Join Date:Posts: 59003
People do all the time. Lust or love usually screws with your vision thoughAs Oprah would say: these guys give you signs! Simple one's to watch for and I've seen this with women mates of mine.
Look at how they treat women who aren't family and whom they're not sexually attracted too. That's his default setting in how he looks at women and how you'll be treated after the honeymoon's over. Not just the obvious stuff either. Does he think of women as separate creatures that are either loved, screwed or to be dismissed as a bit daft? A them and us attitude is not a good sign.
Avoid guys who come out with I love you way too early. Under 4 months I would say. They'll fall out of love just as quick. Emotionally immature types can't express themselves well so either go over the top or act cold.
Bad temper. Not good, especially if it's directed at you. Leave and quick.
Paranoia not good.
Putting you down a lot, is another one. Usually passed off as joking at first.
What worries or annoys you in the early stages will cause problems later on and will be most likely the reason for a split.
if you're making excuses for them, for stuff they're doing and blaming yourself, that's a bad sign.
Pretty much the same for guys looking at women really.
Classic example, he was telling you exactly what was what.before my lad told me to ease off being public about us because he was seeing someone else he used to say 'I keep waiting for the day you realise I'm not as great as you think I am'. Think less 'modest' and more 'cheating $hitbag'. lol.
Didn't stop you though did it?Also, when we first met, we got a little tipsy and did the whole 'ask me any question you like' thing. Usually it would be something a bit cheeky but insightful, his was 'do you wax your bits?'. And they say romance is dead. That would be the lust...He text me, referring to the wedding invite, saying 'guess what I got?'. I replied 'several STIs?' and that was pretty much that. Sweet. Will file that away for future ref. Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.
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SarahSassy wrote: »Well girls, I have to say, despite the fact I should be on hols visiting him this week I am doing very well. I think it was a blessing in disguise that he treated me so badly... Its making it easier. Have not contacted him and have heard nothing from him (the spineless %$&£)...
Hope the calm continues.....
woo hoo! Go girl! 0 -
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