Talk About Your Relationships Here

Sherifu

Ah, teenage hormones. Good times. Of course you need to like their personality nikki 122 but you also need to be attracted to them physically in my humble opinion. As for txting the guy you saw holding his exs hand, well that's the world of hurt option.

aye

nikki 122 wrote: »

ha must be!! don't know what you look like though. i said it before and i'll say it again why can't more lads be as nice as you! although you could be one of those who is a great mate but a terrible boyfriend... ah just kidding!!!

nah i'm great at that too!!

aye

nikki 122 wrote: »

i did not take it as a compliment it made me very conscious . Hope you're right !

i am!
his insecurites lead him to say that.

as for texting that guy back, you shut the door, do you really wanna open it again!
no one holds hands with their ex, in fact if i was walking down the street with an ex i'd be very conscious that my hand was nowhere near hers.

jellie

nikki 122 wrote: »

i'm probanly looking too hard!

probably. as big of a cliche as it is, a whole lot of people find someone when theyre not really looking. i know its hard to not look, and if youre thinking about not looking then youre really putting too much effort into it (am i even making sense?). but try relax about it & concentrate on things other than boys

oh & yeah sounds v dodgy about holding the ex's hand. cant really think of an innocent explanation..

Reader001

hi all, I have been going out with my boyfriend for almost 6 years - I am 28 he is 30. I have my house he has his. We spend most nights together, I go to his he comes to mine. I really love him and I know he loves me. He works with lots of young girls and I get so insecure and paranoid when he has to work away with a team and there is one girl in particular that I get worried about. I have asked him about her and he gets really mad at me for thinking he would cheat and that they are just mates. he does have allot of female friends from college. 3 in particular that he is very close too. at the begining I found this really hard but now I am good friends with these girls and 2 of them are in serious relationships. What brought me to write this is. I was away for a few days and came back tonight I had to drive for 4 hours and I did not get one call from him to see how I was getting on. MY DAD CALLED ME TWICE. But this is the kind of thing he would do, I have been away for a few nights and he has no interest in seeing me. when he is away I make such an effort to make sure I am in his have food for him and the place is warm, Then I get a phone call from him at 9 to say he is just leaving work and a big story as to why he is late leaving work, I am finding it really hard to believe him. Am I being stupid.

nikki 122

You're not being stupid at all you have every right to be suspicious but in fairness to him don't automatically think that he is up to something and the best thing you can do right now is talk about it with him. As for the girls as friends I would not worry because so many lads have girls as friends and nothing happens

just want to thank everyone for their advice for me it worked wonders. I t reached the tip of the ice-berg last night when himself told me he did not go out saturday, I found out from one of my mates that he was at his ex's party, so thats it!

mollybird

ladies,
how do ye feel about long distance relationships? are they worth it at all?

id say im kinda in one at teh moment. we are only an hour away from each other and the first year was great it was comepletly 50/50. i was down in dub one half of the week and he came up to me the other half. this year though it's feels like im doing most of the work. but i feel so secure in the relationship that i don't feel i need to do all the running lately. if he can't come up to me either way after me coming down a good bit i stop making the effort. im not going down twice a week. i'm a student and dont' have the money to be making all the trips.

Crumble Froo

mollybird wrote: »

ladies,
how do ye feel about long distance relationships? are they worth it at all?

depends on the man.

id say im kinda in one at teh moment. we are only an hour away from each other and the first year was great it was comepletly 50/50. i was down in dub one half of the week and he came up to me the other half. this year though it's feels like im doing most of the work. but i feel so secure in the relationship that i don't feel i need to do all the running lately. if he can't come up to me either way after me coming down a good bit i stop making the effort. im not going down twice a week. i'm a student and dont' have the money to be making all the trips.[/QUOTE]

you have no idea how lucky you are. if you have a problem, for hte love of god, TALK ABOUT IT WITH HIM! some guys just dont think of these things.

im currently living in new zealand, 11,000 miles away as the crow flies, 13,000 something by planes. probably the best thing i've ever done in my life, a huge leap, a huge change, i miss so much about home, but hell i have such an amazing thing goin on here, and the long distance was so incredibly worth it. we had to communicate so much via email/msn, so much more talking about what was actually going on, so much more honesty than i've experienced in any relationship before... and yep.. i say, if you think the guy is worth it..then go for it. full stop.

nikki 122

to be honest i don't think they work you need to phisically be with someone but i guess it does differ from person to person

Crumble Froo

well, having only spent just over 8 weeks with my fella, we have only recently celebrated our 2 year anniversary.

nikki 122

fair play to you i could not do it then again i've never been with someone that i really liked so i can't say much

Crumble Froo

well forget about the long distance/ short distance thign. look at the big picture. is this a person you are bothered with? could/would either of you make genuine sacrifices for each other? how much are ye really into each other?how much od ye really know each toehr.

mollybird

after our weekend away in galway i have found that we are on such a different level. you know the one where you know your guy more than his friends do. didn't think it was possible with the distance thing but guess i was wrong. yes i know i should tell him that he is slipping again on his part but then i don't want to be nagging him. he knows im not impressed with him not doing his part by me not coming down all the time and the fact that im missing watching the rugby thing is well htis weekend is put in to. he knows where i am if he needs me.

jellie

mollybird wrote: »

ladies,
how do ye feel about long distance relationships? are they worth it at all?

id say im kinda in one at teh moment. we are only an hour away from each other and the first year was great it was comepletly 50/50. i was down in dub one half of the week and he came up to me the other half. this year though it's feels like im doing most of the work. but i feel so secure in the relationship that i don't feel i need to do all the running lately. if he can't come up to me either way after me coming down a good bit i stop making the effort. im not going down twice a week. i'm a student and dont' have the money to be making all the trips.

no 2 relationships are the same. what works for some people might not work for others. long distance can be extremely difficult, especially when youve to go without seeing each other a long time.

having said that, i wouldnt really class your relationship as long distance. it takes me longer to get to work. you could see him whenever you wanted to with a small bit of effort. not really possible in long distance, it takes me 6 hours to get to my bf

Grinderman

Sometimes my strange thoughts really worry me late at night.

So you are going out with someone and you meet or see a picture of an ex or more than 1 ex. And you just go EFFIN HELL, did you really go out with that person. I think it is more a guy thing, as i think a lot of guys go for a similar type, whereas women tend to go out with different types.
Im not just talking looks, its also personality.
You meet the ex and think, i am absolutely nothing like the ex.
Garry

Cathmandooo

Grinderman wrote: »

Sometimes my strange thoughts really worry me late at night.

So you are going out with someone and you meet or see a picture of an ex or more than 1 ex. And you just go EFFIN HELL, did you really go out with that person. I think it is more a guy thing, as i think a lot of guys go for a similar type, whereas women tend to go out with different types.
Im not just talking looks, its also personality.
You meet the ex and think, i am absolutely nothing like the ex.
Garry

Was there a question in that? why do you have to be like an ex of your OH's? surely everyones different anyway

Silverfish

I think with every person you go out with, you learn a bit more about what you want and don't want in a person.

So, the next person you go out with is (usually) a bit better in one way or another than the last. So, it depends on how many steps there was between that ex and you.

Nightwish

I've only had one other serious relationship other than the one I'm in and it ended amicably. As I'm not in love with him, I do kinda cringe at the thought of say ever kissing him or sleeping with him again, but I could never fault the guy. He was a real sweetheart.

Crumble Froo

only one ex do i think of and shudder. dear heavens, that was a bad one.

Jackz

love and crazy are such close friends.

spinandscribble

is it normal to feel literally sick thinking of ex's? like when you remember things and you want to puke?

Crumble Froo

yep.

Grinderman

Cathooo wrote: »

Was there a question in that? why do you have to be like an ex of your OH's? surely everyones different anyway

Obviously Not, it was posted somewhere else and moved to the rants page (the mods obviously think im bitter, so lets throw it in the RANTS)
Just forget i was here.

Cathmandooo

Grinderman wrote: »

Obviously Not, it was posted somewhere else and moved to the rants page (the mods obviously think im bitter, so lets throw it in the RANTS)
Just forget i was here.

The mods are just trying to keep this place from becoming a relationship forum, so they put all things about relationships into one thread, don't take it to heart and feel free to post, the more the merrier

Profiler

Well, let me tell you as a Man, some of the more shi**y things you girls have been put through and described on here, I've been responsible for with my Ex's, much to my shame.

I've had two girls tell me how much they cared about me, heard it, felt panic and terror and then run as far and fast as I could.

I've acted like a total tool, but only so she would end it as I hate having "that" conversation.

I've done a lot of bad things (but I've never cheated on anyone)

I know I did these things because I was immature, because I hated the thought of needing someone because I feared they would leave me, because I've been pretty selfish.

I've also lost the one true love of my life because of the way I've behaved.

Karma - yep, What goes around come around - I have that tsh*rt too.

Potential-Monke

Won't go into too much detail, but need yeir advice.

Right, not the best looking fella, never was or will be, so i make up for it with old fashioned romance, manners, and gentlemanliness. Which seems to work fine. So, going out with someone for over 1 1/2 years, and all's excellent.

Now, was in a previous 6 year relationship, which ended when i was two timed (something i've never done, and never will do). It wasn't even 2timing sex, it was a kiss, but thats enough for me. We tried to stay together, but as far as i was concerned, that night was the end of it. But, this has had a knock on effect, i get crazy jealous.

Long story short(er), my love, for want of a better word, is going to be going travelling for a year or so at some stage in the next, well, year. I don;t want to break up, as i believe no matter the distance, once you love someone you can wait. She's not giving me a straight answer as to what she wants to do. This was apparently a plan she had with her (bitch) friend, who is intent that she breaks up with me for this "holiday", and i know she only wants this because she doesn't want to be the only slut sleeping around with someone from every country.

Because of my past experiences getting women, and with women, i've basically said that i can wait, i will wait, and i'd even meet up with her for a few months if thats what she wants/it takes. But, and here's where i'm probably wrong in saying, if she breaks up with me, thats the end of it. No getting back together once she's back. Take me now, or leave me forever.

I can't share someone i love. People have said to me that i'm being selfish, and making it impossible for her to make a decision, but is it that much to ask that if you love someone that you would wait? Maybe thats the old-fashioned romance coming out in me.

Help please!!! And, ah, sorry this isn't as short as i had intended...

Far from being unreasonable.
I think your 100% in the right, asking her to let you know where you stand before you spend a year waiting around for her.
However dreading the trouble it takes to find a new relationship is a poor reason to stay in the old one.
And I don't know anyone who when it came down to it, chose OZ over a loving relationship with a future.

Potential-Monke

Moonbaby wrote: »

And I don't know anyone who when it came down to it, chose OZ over a loving relationship with a future.

Thats bloody typical. I bust my balls being the best i possibly can be, and yet still women today seems to hav the sense and logic part of thier brain hidden. But i know who's to blame! Trendy boys.

Trendy boys, the majority of the time, only care about themselves and no-one else, and mostly are only with a woman for the sex. This leads women to think that all men are the same. So i reckon anyway. Correct me if my generalisation is wrong.

I don't want to break up with her, and there's no point in talking about it now as she doesn't know what she'll do if and when it comes to it. But it drives me insane sometimes.

cregser

As I'm no wimmin and this is a wimmins board, I'll keep my response succinct:

Take a hint.

Potential-Monke

cregser wrote: »

Take a hint.

Not helping, and keep your smart comments to yourself thank you very much.