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Shortest jokes ever!

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Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 112 ✭✭Plumpynuter


    Leaper says to hooker,

    Keep the tip


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 112 ✭✭Plumpynuter


    Went to the zoo with only one dog in it

    It was a shiatsu


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 112 ✭✭Plumpynuter


    Ahern


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    There’s a repair shop for baroque musical instruments.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    A pyromaniac was quite disappointed when he checked out Match.com


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,346 ✭✭✭blindpilot


    Velcro. What a rip off!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    The wise never marry, and when they marry they become otherwise.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    A nurse is a pan handler.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    do they get virgin wool from Ugly sheep.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,418 ✭✭✭TheIrishGrover


    Yore knob


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    The leper lost the poker game when he threw in his hand.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Dammit i'm mad is Dammit i'm mad spelled backwards


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 949 ✭✭✭LoanShark


    I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,135 ✭✭✭POINTBREAK




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    When women enter middle age, it gives men a pause.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,743 ✭✭✭blatantrereg


    Hemingway was famed for his "For sale: baby shoes, never worn."
    Bit of a sick bastard really; that's not funny at all.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 386 ✭✭lmao


    N B G A..... That's bang out of order.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Curiosity Killed the Cat: that's the dog's story, and he's sticking to it


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,142 ✭✭✭theoneeyedman


    shortest joke in history.....Irish rugby's record of grand-slam wins over the last 70 odd years!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 542 ✭✭✭rgmmg


    3 testicled russian - whodyounik abollickov


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    If you think 7 years bad luck for breaking a mirror is to much try,breaking a condom!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,115 ✭✭✭Pal


    What do you call a deer with one eye ?
    No idea

    What do you call a deer with one eye and one leg ?
    Still no idea


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,393 ✭✭✭MonkieSocks


    Manchester United's Europa clash versus Athletic Bilbao reminds me of a night out I had when I got Diarrhoea.






    Sh!t over both legs.

    =(:-) Me? I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude (-:)=



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    Bought some 'rocket salad' yesterday but it went off before I could eat it!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 656 ✭✭✭Bearhunter


    How do you catch a unique rabbit?
    Unique up on it...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 947 ✭✭✭Enright


    how do you catch a tame unique rabbit?


    TAME way, you nique up behind it!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 104 ✭✭C0SM0


    EXIT signs, they're on the way out aren't they!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,792 ✭✭✭Ded_Zebra


    Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    I've just blocked my toilet.I don't know why I added it on Skype in the first place.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,912 ✭✭✭Bootup


    I spent some time in the Ukraine last year, and had a chick in Kiev.


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