Anyone else like me? Shampoo and Toilet Paper

BraziliaNZ · 08-12-2010 10:53PM

kjl wrote: »

Maybe page 16 isn't the best place to say this, but I do have an immaculate diet. I eat a strict healthy from my 5 a day no sugars, refined carb or saturated fats. I don't eat red meat and would only every eat fish, chicken or turkey and I don't drink alcohol.

I have no problem with my bowel movement, in fact they are never particularly dirty or messy. The cleaning process begins with hot water being jetted into my anus which clean out the excess, then I have a little bar of soap to clean it with. It's not like I scoop it out with my hands and start playing with it. My hand rarely comes into contact with faeces, and if it does I clean it with extra vigour.

I don't think it's unhygienic at all, but this is a bit too much info, imfo!!!

hsanz114clayton · 08-12-2010 10:53PM

Dude.
No.

amdublin · 08-12-2010 10:54PM

kjl wrote: »

I have no problem with my bowel movement, in fact they are never particularly dirty or messy. The cleaning process begins with hot water being jetted into my anus which clean out the excess, then I have a little bar of soap to clean it with. It's not like I scoop it out with my hands and start playing with it. My hand rarely comes into contact with faeces, and if it does I clean it with extra vigour.

Again:

amdublin wrote: »

This is the vilest thread ever.

easyeason3 · 08-12-2010 10:57PM

kjl wrote: »

Maybe page 16 isn't the best place to say this, but I do have an immaculate diet. I eat a strict healthy from my 5 a day no sugars, refined carb or saturated fats. I don't eat red meat and would only every eat fish, chicken or turkey and I don't drink alcohol.

I have no problem with my bowel movement, in fact they are never particularly dirty or messy. The cleaning process begins with hot water being jetted into my anus which clean out the excess, then I have a little bar of soap to clean it with. It's not like I scoop it out with my hands and start playing with it. My hand rarely comes into contact with faeces, and if it does I clean it with extra vigour.

WTF???
Why do you think we need to know what you jet into your anus?
Seriously, this is way too much information.

Captain_Generic · 08-12-2010 10:58PM

kjl wrote: »

The cleaning process begins with hot water being jetted into my anus .

Pics?

2 stroke · 08-12-2010 11:07PM

kjl wrote: »

I read somewhere that 27000 trees are cut down everyday to make toilet paper for the world.Thoughts?

27000 trees cut down daily means 27000 trees planted. Without a demand for paper, less trees would be planted. If you like seeing trees use more paper.

kjl wrote: »

When I am done, I clean my hand completely with hot water and soap.

Thank God for that. Proof that you don't work in food preparation.

Little Mickey · 08-12-2010 11:18PM

kjl wrote: »

The cleaning process begins with hot water being jetted into my anus

Using what?

If it's the shower then would not the shower head spray water over some of your clothes too? Then, as for what is removed, into the bath or the shower cubicle floor? :eek:

kjl · 08-12-2010 11:21PM

2 stroke wrote: »

27000 trees cut down daily means 27000 trees planted. Without a demand for paper, less trees would be planted. If you like seeing trees use more paper.

Thank God for that. Proof that you don't work in food preparation.

This has already been addresses, see page 8

kjl · 08-12-2010 11:21PM

Little Mickey wrote: »

Using what?

If it's the shower then would not the shower head spray water over some of your clothes too? Then, as for what is removed, into the bath or the shower cubicle floor? :eek:

this has been discussed too, I use a bidet

TPD · 08-12-2010 11:31PM

I've a feeling OP regrets this thread. Many lols though

Little Mickey · 08-12-2010 11:33PM

kjl wrote: »

this has been discussed too, I use a bidet

Sorry kjl, didn't go through all the thread.
You can only do that at home so? EDIT: Baby wipes, OK..............

Cú Giobach · 08-12-2010 11:40PM

kjl wrote: »

It's not like I scoop it out with my hands and start playing with it. My hand rarely comes into contact with faeces, and if it does I clean it with extra vigour.

Thanks for that, still wiping * as I type.
+1 on shampoo, vile stuff haven't used it in 15 years, a good daily scrubbing in warm water is all thats needed.
A friend once mentioned the word "smearing" regarding paper after he came back from a long stay in India and I think of his words every morning.
Still using the stuff though.
Fair play to ya, great thread.

* Tears of laughter.

bronte · 08-12-2010 11:40PM

kjl wrote: »

Maybe page 16 isn't the best place to say this, but I do have an immaculate diet. I eat a strict healthy from my 5 a day no sugars, refined carb or saturated fats. I don't eat red meat and would only every eat fish, chicken or turkey and I don't drink alcohol.

I hear Dunnes have a special on Guinness and Kitten Soft this week.

Juwwi · 08-12-2010 11:41PM

Does kjl stand for

know jacks looroll

tricks · 08-12-2010 11:45PM

2 stroke wrote: »

27000 trees cut down daily means 27000 trees planted.

Really? That is absolute bullsh*t. Read something on rates of deforestation please. They do replant tree's in some places but it is nowhere near the amount needed and it takes a long long time for a tree to grow, within which millions more will have been cut down. Yes eventually the trees will grow, but by then there will be only a fraction remaining.

No I'm not an arse-washing recycling obsessed eco maniac, I'm just stating your facts are wrong

Big Game · 08-12-2010 11:48PM

To the OP, has anyone asked you how you feel about washing the hair in your hole with detergent yet???

Or do you get a back, sack and crack wax job perchance?

kjl · 08-12-2010 11:51PM

tricks wrote: »

Really? That is absolute bullsh*t. Read something on rates of deforestation please. They do replant tree's in some places but it is nowhere near the amount needed and it takes a long long time for a tree to grow, within which millions more will have been cut down. Yes eventually the trees will grow, but by then there will be only a fraction remaining.

No I'm not an arse-washing recycling obsessed eco maniac, I'm just stating your facts are wrong

Again Page 8 of this thread. There is an environmental effect from toilet paper production

kjl · 08-12-2010 11:52PM

Big Game wrote: »

To the OP, has anyone asked you how you feel about washing the hair in your hole with detergent yet???

Or do you get a back, sack and crack wax job perchance?

I don't think I have even seen hair growing inside someone's anus before, just on the cheeks outside it.

Cú Giobach · 08-12-2010 11:53PM

tricks wrote: »

No I'm not an arse-washing recycling obsessed eco maniac,

:eek:

tricks · 08-12-2010 11:56PM

Cú Giobach wrote: »

:eek:

I meant instead of toilet paper :P

tricks · 08-12-2010 11:59PM

kjl wrote: »

Again Page 8 of this thread. There is an environmental effect from toilet paper production

I know there is, I agree with you on this part

Big Game · 09-12-2010 12:05AM

kjl wrote: »

I don't think I have even seen hair growing inside someone's anus before, just on the cheeks outside it.

Have you looked inside many anuses? :eek:

I was using 'hole' as the generic expression for one's entire ass hence my reference to the 'crack' part of the wax......

kylith · 09-12-2010 12:17AM

lil_lisa wrote: »

Why has the human race become so "unimmune" to itself?

Next, we'll see people here wrapped in big glass bubbles instructing someone to type threads on boards for them because they don't want to touch something a fly might have landed on.

I'm not saying we should all go rolling around in mud or anything but we seem to be heading to an extreme!

I guess you're talking about the 'poo on your hands' thing. No, we haven't become unimmune to ourselves, but neither have we become immune to E Coli, salmonella or cryptosporidium.

Fizman · 09-12-2010 12:22AM

kylith wrote: »

I guess you're talking about the 'poo on your hands' thing. No, we haven't become unimmune to ourselves, but neither have we become immune to E Coli, salmonella or cryptosporidium.

Sure some of that stuff you mentioned there even fcuks Superman up.

kylith · 09-12-2010 12:25AM

Fizman wrote: »

Sure some of that stuff you mentioned there even fcuks Superman up.

You shíte Kryptonite?

parker kent · 09-12-2010 12:38AM

kylith wrote: »

You shíte Kryptonite?

I've heard of curries that would make you shíte green, but that would take the biscuit :pac:

kjl · 09-12-2010 12:40AM

kylith wrote: »

I guess you're talking about the 'poo on your hands' thing. No, we haven't become unimmune to ourselves, but neither have we become immune to E Coli, salmonella or cryptosporidium.

yeah, I don't eat the ****.

kjl · 09-12-2010 12:42AM

tricks wrote: »

I know there is, I agree with you on this part

Sorry, mis read your post. Just so used to people telling my how wrong I am

starbelgrade · 09-12-2010 12:47AM

kjl wrote: »

Sorry, mis read your post. Just so used to people telling my how wrong I am

Ironic, seeing as you usually are.

parker kent · 09-12-2010 12:49AM

OP, I agree with you on the basic principle of using a bidet after going to the toilet. Washing is 100 times cleaner than rubbing some crappy paper (pun entirely intended) around your ass. Some futurologists predict that toilet paper will not be used within the next 100 years. The Japanese are already using some pretty advanced toilets to eliminate the need for paper.

But since we are in Ireland, I still think the need for paper exists, when not at home anyway. There are no real alternatives to using paper at work, restaurants etc. Using baby wipes is much the same as normal paper in an environmental sense. Plus they block up toilets frequently. But using them to "polish" post wipe is good practice!

Not sure why people feel the need to laugh at somebody who is a bit cleaner than most people!

Anyone else like me? Shampoo and Toilet Paper

Comments