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What are your funniest Irish sayings?



  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,693 ✭✭✭✭ OutlawPete

    Anyone ever hear this bad boy?

    "Get the name of early rising and you can sleep till dinner time."

  • Registered Users Posts: 887 suitseir

    "You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear!"

  • Registered Users Posts: 96 ✭✭✭ Germag

    Tá sé mahogany gas pipe.

  • Registered Users Posts: 527 ✭✭✭ EI111

    I'd eat a horse between two bread vans

  • Registered Users Posts: 945 steve_

    "I wouldnt get up on her to get over a wall"

    "sure go on, its the last friday of the week"

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  • Registered Users Posts: 308 ✭✭ Azhrei

    Something you'll often hear in Cork -

    "Look at tha' there, 'la."


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,492 Thomas828

    I've thought of one more: "Yer beat out all roads!" (beat rhymes with 8) You're stymied. There's nothing you can do.

  • Registered Users Posts: 8,204 ✭✭✭ partyguinness

    On shagging a 'loose' girl....

    "It was like a dog wagging it's tail in a bucket of water."

    Still cracks me up...:D

  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,077 Rebelheart

    Look at the head on that fella and the price of turnips.

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,325 ItsAWindUp

    When someone is wearing fairly summery clothes :"I hope we get the weather your looking for!". Always gets me haha!

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  • Registered Users Posts: 142 ✭✭ RustyBeanTin

    You're an awful eeijet, d'ya know that

    My ma is some geebag

    Bollocks! The car is banjaxed

    Be right out. I'm just taking a ****e

    Alright, loosebit. Any chance of a ride

    Wha do ya mean do I love ya? aren't I riding ya!

    that guiness is cuttin the hole of me

  • Registered Users Posts: 10 ✭✭✭ scrappycoco

    Describing women:
    -I wouldn't ride her if she had peddles
    -She's as raw as bacon

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,971 ✭✭✭ we'llallhavetea_old

    "help the wear" - my da says this everytime ye get new clothes.... ?

    he is from cavan though....

  • Registered Users Posts: 3,767 ✭✭✭ civis_liberalis

    I started a sentence the other day among friends by saying "muise" (muh-shah).

    They thought it was a right culch thing to say. My first language is Irish so I sometimes slip in the odd word unbeknownst to myself.

    Them lads off the RTÉ Storyland thing, "Hardy Bucks" are a goldmine for Hiberno-Anglicisms.

  • Registered Users Posts: 22,333 ✭✭✭✭ Dyr

    dere's currants for cakes but dere's raysons for many things

  • Registered Users Posts: 724 shapez

    Apologies if they were mentioned and if you find them offensive. I've heard of the following......

    "So hungry, I'd eat the ar*e off a low flying duck!"

    "So hungry, I'd eat a farmers ar*e through a hedge!"

    "Sick as 10 episodes of ER!"

    "She's goin' like a wh*re on rails!"

    "I'd leave a face on her like a painters radio!"

    "I'd whitewash her bowels!"

    "Leave a load in her the size of a cowsh*te!"

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,512 BigDuffman

    Yer wan was kissing me like a horse eating an apple through a letter box.

    *watching girls trying to walk in heels* "she's like a newborn girraffe on roller skates"

    *Bouncer to a short chap in a suit acting the muppet* "Here listen shorty, f*ck off back on top of that wedding cake*

    *Chinese lad gives a chinese girl a jockey back out of club* Bouncer goes "here look a chinese take away"

    Scaldy Balls
    Short arms long pockets - Tight
    He'd line his pockets with rubber to steal soup - Tight / Light fingered
    "Here mate you dropped a triangle" - To a chap thats shaping / strutting
    "have you ever picked up teeth with broken fingers...?"
    Pick a window your leaving
    Good Jaysus- (Colm Meaney does it best!)
    How'd you get the black eye....? "Yer owl one man, she poked me in the eye with her cock"

  • Registered Users Posts: 146 ✭✭ Optimum

    Shaking like a ****ting dog

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,919 ✭✭✭✭ orourkeda

    Go on ourrrrra dat

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 16,137 ✭✭✭✭ admiralofthefleet

    stick/work it up the eye of your prick

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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,512 BigDuffman

    Or the little bow wow was leppin' up at me!
    Leppin about the place like a mad whoer

  • Registered Users Posts: 353 ✭✭ bradyle

    awh bless your cotten socks....for when someone does somrthin cute or sweet

  • Registered Users Posts: 111 ✭✭ Stevokenevo

    The head on ya - like two mile o' bad road

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,674 ✭✭✭✭ Hagar

    Bad cess to ye. That has to be the most evil curse ever. :D

  • Registered Users Posts: 20 MHDesigns

    "he wudnt drink soup"

    "she had a f***y like a clowns pocket"

    "cudnt organise a p**s up in a brewery"

    "and Bobs your uncle" as in job done

    "you're your fathers son"

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 485 ✭✭ Elenxor

    We'll just have one more before we go!!!

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 884 ya-ba-da-ba-doo

    How's your mother for duckeggs?

    How's yer pit for silage?

    How's yer ma's arse for maggots?

    She had a face like a pig lickin' piss off a nettle.

  • Registered Users Posts: 3,699 bamboozle

    'that was horribly nice'

  • Registered Users Posts: 102 ✭✭✭ unit88

    A old man who used to drink in a pub i worked in used to say "never let anyone tell your mother she reared a gibber" which apparently means your not a gobbsh*te made me laugh each time

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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,812 Precious flower

    '[Insert name here] got fair thick with me!' :p