What are your funniest Irish sayings?

mk2

i'm that hungry i could eat a scabby wayne(child in donegal lol)

WallysWorld

"Ah sure a sniper wouldn't take her out"

"An arse on her like two melons in a floursack" (this can work for tits too)

"I'd ate chips out of her knickers and drink tae out of her bellybutton"

And the perennial favorite on asking someone what they will have to drink "You'd drink it out of the hollow of a cowsh1te..."

Aglomerado

Fánny like a welly top

I'm breaking my shíte laughing at this thread...

neil_hosey

i wouldnt ride her into battle..

i wouldnt get up on her to get over a wall..

cournioni

Not a saying as such but I was talking to a local lad who had seven shades of ****e beaten out of him St. Stephens day two years ago by some bouncers. I asked him how he got the shiner on his eye... He replied "I battered the ****e out of 10 lads and walked into a door!"

sensibleken

Go raibh grainneóg a chead chac eile agat - may your next sh1te be a hedgehog

Standard Toaster

"Spit on me Dickie"

moonpurple

a lot done .... more to do

MitchKoobski

Shure he's as mad as a month of sundays!

cournioni

"Thats me arse of a crack"

Jonty

"I wouldn't ride her even if she had pedals"

veXual

"You'd be better off throwin stones at a jacket"

Personal favourite of mine

Standard Toaster

"She's a head like a bag of burnt Lego"

Live4Ever

Whiskey when ur sick makes you well, whiskey when your well makes you sick!

Funky G

that would be an ecumenical matter, father.

Funky G

how are ye Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuud

storeeeee buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuud

jaysus

fcuk sake

ask me boll ox

Kent Brockman

It could be worse, "shur the ass could be dead and the turf still in the bog"

Kent Brockman

When a cracking girl is going out with a fat/ugly tosser....

"He must have a chocolate cock!"

Rubberlegs

When someone loves themselves: If she was a bar of chocolate she'd eat herself. Or as my friend's Mam says " She thinks she's Calvita cheese. She's not even the cow on the box!"

rrbm

One my dad says when I criticise his driving is 'I was driving before your arse was the size of a shirtbutton'......

_sparkie_

she's only a bleedin' slu

pipelaser

"I will in me week"

AskMyChocolate

"My arse and Pady Flaherty's"

Footnote: I think this may have been the phrase that gave birth to Paddy Whiskey's popularity. Although I have no limks and would be interested. I'm pretty sure it had to do with a revolt by publicans against overpriced established whiskey brands.

I'm still a traitor and a Jameson man.:(

Edit: The lads in the bar who trained me still say it was about a salesman who could sell you a case of anything, and his name happened to be Paddy.

christina_x

The-Rigger wrote: »

Up me arse, pickin daisys

Person 1: Do you know where (name of person/object) is?
Person 2: Is my face red?
Person 1: Nope
Person 2: Well then, theyr/its not up my arse picking daisys

christina_x

Michaelrsh wrote: »

F*#~ me pink and call me pony!

**** me pink and call me rosie

i seen a few variations of this one!

StereoLove

You've got Bob hope and no hope:) This one always cracks me up!

delaad

This may have been mentioned before, but the Germans, seemingly, reckon that one of our funniest sayings - in a country where things, in their eyes, could not possibly be more desperate - is....."Ah, sure, there's nothing bad, but could be worse."

FarmerGreen

delaad wrote: »

This may have been mentioned before, but the Germans, seemingly, reckon that one of our funniest sayings - in a country where things, in their eyes, could not possibly be more desperate - is....."Ah, sure, there's nothing bad, but could be worse."

I heard it as.
Enjoy the war while you can.
When its over there will be nothing for us.
Could be wrong.

puffdragon

"Ah sure that'n has no arse , just a hole in her back!"

"As sure as there's ****e in a dog!"

"Fit as a butcher's dog"

Bad hangover; "I've a heed like a football and a mouth like a boxers armpit"

some_dose

Your so cool you'd **** icecream