Mankiest thing you've seen at throwing out time? [No pics!]

TeletextPear · 13-09-2008 10:49am

Captain Slow IRL wrote: »

Camera phone?!?!?!

ah that'd be a bit mean, we've all been there haha

but i saw the other day that he was quoted in one paper about how kids shouldnt drink on junior cert results night - wish i had a pic then!!!

ewj1978 · 13-09-2008 1:25pm

A guy walks out of the pub, goes to the wall at the left of the door, Pulls down his pants, squats, does a dump, while puking between his legs....:(

m@cc@ · 13-09-2008 3:27pm

R0ot wrote: »

Saw a guy down a pint, then puke back in the glass then he left it on the bar counter, I let one of the other bar staff lift it kthk! :pac:

I've seen that too, filthy bastards. Plus why would you down a pint anyway, gone are the days of actually enjoying beer.

Captain Slow IRL · 13-09-2008 4:58pm

TeletextPear wrote: »

ah that'd be a bit mean, we've all been there haha but i saw the other day that he was quoted in one paper about how kids shouldnt drink on junior cert results night - wish i had a pic then!!!

Ahh ffs - you coulda sent it into the star and made a bit of money off it:D

keane2097 · 14-09-2008 2:08am

Captain Slow IRL wrote: »

Ahh ffs - you coulda sent it into the star and made a bit of money off it:D

Sure Hasselhoff's kids posted worse of him... Then again he is probably the world's biggest tard...

flyingoutside · 14-09-2008 2:57am

TeletextPear wrote: »

ah that'd be a bit mean, we've all been there haha but i saw the other day that he was quoted in one paper about how kids shouldnt drink on junior cert results night - wish i had a pic then!!!

Do we even get a clue of who it was???

who007 · 14-09-2008 3:11am

I'd just like to say thanks to all the posters on this topic fo rreally helping me have a great laugh on nightshift. All except person who posted this:

kickoutthejams wrote: »

The sweaty overhang of the muffin top provides an excellent and well lubricated spot with easy access for sex.

That image really made me feel sick!!:(

keane2097 · 14-09-2008 3:11am

flyingoutside wrote: »

Do we even get a clue of who it was???

That ****in eejit off the cafe for sure imo.

reggiethefirst · 14-09-2008 3:17am

That was my first thought too. Would be a laugh though if it was Ray Darcy.

flyingoutside · 14-09-2008 3:26am

keane2097 wrote: »

That ****in eejit off the cafe for sure imo.

Was thinking that dark hair feck too?

keane2097 · 14-09-2008 3:41am

flyingoutside wrote: »

Was thinking that dark hair feck too?

I have literally no idea what this question means...

flyingoutside · 14-09-2008 3:45am

keane2097 wrote: »

I have literally no idea what this question means...

Me neither. meant to say i was thinking it was the lad with dark hair from the cafe.

Lockstep · 14-09-2008 11:01am

who007 wrote: »

That image really made me feel sick!!:(

YOu were turned on.
Admit it.

shoelaceface · 14-09-2008 2:19pm

people talk about girls peeing in the street! iv never seen a girl just pee in the street... maybe behind a car or down a sidestreet......but we'v all had the desperate need to go

what about the MEN who just pee against the wall beside where your standing and let it run right past your feet! and then come along and stick their mingey urine filled hands into your bag of chips..... :mad: :mad: :mad:

oohhhhhhhhhhh you have touched a nerve!

ewj1978 · 14-09-2008 2:21pm

the urine washes the dirt off the hands to be sure!

MJOR · 14-09-2008 9:38pm

I worked in a bar and one night one of the lads came down stairs and said i am going over to Gorbys and am gonna find the ba$tard wearing one sock... i swear to fu€k!!! I was like whoa what happened? Turns out someone got the squits and wiped his ass with the sock and it blocked the loo!!

(Sorry)

homerjay2005 · 14-09-2008 10:11pm

work in me mates nightclub behind the bar now and then when he is short staffed. f*ckin love it, being 100% sober and watching people off their face at 3 in the morning is class i have to say. the only thing that i dont like is the scraps, some of them do be crazy. had to break up a girl fight before, it was class :P.

generally find that the womans toilets have, as already said a few posts up, got messier and messier over the course of the last 5 years. the lads toilets dont be too bad in all fairness bar the odd bit of bad aiming here and there.

as regards manky, nothing too much, having to throw a couple of 100 drinks down the sink at the end of each nite can be bad, especilly if there rally old ones.lots of sick especially around the bar counter. things are much easier and cleaner since the smoking ban came in.

have to say however, most of the funniest/mankiest things ive seen have been from me own mates on nights out. puking/pissing on themselves etc.

heard a story off one of the lads from worl - there is a pub (apparantly) in tipperary somewhere, where there s no toilet paper in the jacks as the clients there are very backward and dont use it. they basically just sh*t and use their hands to clean themselves and rub it into the walls. :eek: it supposed to be disgusting.

Slidey · 14-09-2008 10:38pm

MJOR wrote: »

I worked in a bar and one night one of the lads came down stairs and said i am going over to Gorbys and am gonna find the ba$tard wearing one sock... i swear to fu€k!!! I was like whoa what happened? Turns out someone got the squits and wiped his ass with the sock and it blocked the loo!!

(Sorry)

Ha ha.. fcuking deadly!

14-09-2008 11:42pm

this thread is :O

Raskolnikov · 15-09-2008 12:16am

Was in the toilets of a club one night. Heard some shenanigans going on in the disabled cubicle. Next thing, the door slowly opens outwards and I see a chap with pants around the ankles and a young wan with skirt hoisted up riding him. The worst thing was that she was servicing another chap who was standing, facing her, with big pimply arse grinding against her face.

I honestly thought that sort of thing never happened.

brendansmith · 15-09-2008 12:25am

Cuddlesworth wrote: »

About 2 years ago just down the road from Porterhouse Templebar saw a massive barfight. Two groups of lads about 10 lads each going at it hammer and thongs. No idea what started it.

At the end of it when the police were streaming in and those that could ran. One lad carries another over to the curb and sits him down. Chap on the curb was in absolute bits, covered in blood. Anyway, mate produces a bottle of beer and hands it to him. Must have been some nice way of saying, "Glad I don't look like you"

Guy in a daze, picks up bottle and starts to drink it. A large portion of the beer then spills back down the front of his shirt. Confused he does it again. And again it spills down the front of he shirt. Clearly concerned at this stage he puts down the bottle and reaches up towards his face.

His beer bottle producing mate is at this stage taking notice of the clear panic on the mates face. The cop thats now walking towards them also notices. But in fairness they both react different when he proceeds to pul away most of the skin above his chin exposing the gums and bottom of his teeth behind a big flap of bloody skin.

The mate goes green and faints. The copper stands still and says loudly, "****". A couple of the usual gawkers start screaming. Cops start running left right and centre trying to find out what is going on.

Guy on ground goes back to drinking his beer.

My kebab ends up in the bin and I can count the amount of times I now drink in town per year on one hand.

My god! Too early for this, way too early!

blue-army · 15-09-2008 12:29am

I remember in 5th class in Primary school during the middle of Maths...
One guy raised his hand and suddenly shouted out "Teacher, I need to go to the bathroom, I'm gonna be (Sick)" ...and with that he threw up all over the boy in front of him.
The boy in front carefully took off his jumper and when he saw the green vomit all over it he immediately threw up all over the boy in front of him!

It was like a Mexican wave of vomit!

Slidey · 15-09-2008 2:59am

I was at a house party in Ballygar in Galway and 2 lads had a competition to see who could drink the large bottles of WKD blue the quickest.

One of them whips the other fella and thel loser looks like he'llbe shouting for ralph at any min.

Winner than picks up a bottle of heinz and fills his mouth completly with it.

Now I like ketchup as much as any man, but this started to churn my stomach and set the other lad off straight away. Yer man swallows the mouth full of ketchup and goes back to drinkin...

Captain Ginger · 15-09-2008 3:34am

Well the toher day I was in a verey popular bar for younger folk in Bray and I wanted to roll up a smoke, but it was really packed inside and too windy outside, so I decided to go to the bathroom.

I walked in and this horrible smell almost killed me, looked safe though, walked into the only non out of order cubical and low and behold it was filled to the very top of the bowl with crap, tissue and piss and vomit dripping over everywhere, I almost got sick myself, was really gross.

CountryWise · 15-09-2008 8:04am

Bar i used to work in, well my mates still work there and told me a funny story.

A young fella at the end of the night after a 21st was trying to score his Aunty no joking, they were all trying to get him to cop on to himself and to stop so he got a bit rowdy with his family!

Overflow · 15-09-2008 12:56pm

On the bus (Bus Eireann) coming home from Killarney after a nice holiday in a rented house. We stop somewhere near limerick and some knacker family gets on with their two little girls. We were sitting near the back of the bus and they came and sat down across from us, right beside the rear fire exit on the bus. Anyway about 30 mins after they get on one of their little girls starts whinging to her mam that she needs to go for a pee. There was no toilet on this bus, so her mother made her go for a p*ss down at the bottom of the rear fire exit, I felt so sorry for the little girl because the bus was jammers and she didnt want to go toilet there. So we had to sit with the lovely stench of urine all the way to dublin.

So then we arrive at Busáras, we get off the bus and walk outside the bus station only to be greeted by a homeless old lady squating outside taking a big steaming dump and p*ss infront of us and tons of other people, not a bother on her.

zoemax · 16-09-2008 2:22pm

Jesus, this is the funniest thing I've read in years.

Not as bad as some of the others....

Many years ago we were coming back to school from an open day in an RTC in a hiace van with no seats in the back - sitting on the spare wheel and our bags. Suddenly one of the lads starts to groan and next thing pukes all over the van. Teacher refuses to stop the van and drives the 100 or so miles back to school with the watery vomit rolling around the back of the van and about ten lads dancing around trying to avoid it. The smell was unreal and as it got worst a couple more of the lads puked. Jesus, I was never as glad to get back to school. My shoes stank of puke all the way home on the bus.

Met this bird in Howl At The Moon one night (nuff said) and on the way back to her gaff she says she has to go for a slash. Walks over to a wall and in full view proceeds to have a piss that I swear, if she had stood on her head, she woukld have cleared the roof of the building with the force of the flow. All I could think was I'm not putting my mouth, finger or kn*b near that so I made my excuses and left.

Last one...used to occasionaly work as a bouncer in a Temple Bar night club years ago and one night after closing was checking the gents toilets and found a guy in a cubicle on his knees with his jocks around his ankles. Toilet was full of puke and **** and between his knees on the floor was a huge turd still connected to his ass by a lone brown rope. I nearly puked on him.

Wagon · 16-09-2008 2:30pm

zoemax wrote: »

Met this bird in Howl At The Moon one night (nuff said) and on the way back to her gaff she says she has to go for a slash. Walks over to a wall and in full view proceeds to have a piss that I swear, if she had stood on her head, she woukld have cleared the roof of the building with the force of the flow. All I could think was I'm not putting my mouth, finger or kn*b near that so I made my excuses and left.

Would you not just ask her to clean it when yis got home?

zoemax · 16-09-2008 3:07pm

Would you not just ask her to clean it when yis got home?

When you have a girlfriend waiting at home you can afford to be proud about these things.

Wagon · 16-09-2008 4:11pm

zoemax wrote: »

When you have a girlfriend waiting at home you can afford to be proud about these things.

Why did that get a "thanks"?

Mankiest thing you've seen at throwing out time? [No pics!]

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