The try harder if ye want to keep a second joke thread thread

Far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean, two prawns were

swimming around in the sea, one called Justin, the other called

Christian. The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by

sharks that inhabited the area. Finally one day Justin said to Christian, "I'm fed-up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shark, then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten."

A large and mysterious cod appeared and said "Your wish is granted" and lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark. Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time passed and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely. All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin didn't realise that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight. While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn. He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and lo and behold, found himself turned back into a prawn.

With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam back to his friends. Looking around the gathering at the reef he realised he couldn't see his old pal. "Where's Christian?" he asked. "He's at home, still distraught that his best

friend changed sides to the enemy and became a shark," came the reply.

Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture,

Justin set off to Christian's abode. As he opened the coral gates

memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "It's

me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again!" Christian

replied, "No way man, you'll eat me. You're a shark, the enemy, and

I'll not be tricked into being your dinner." Justin cried back " No, I'm

not.That was the old me. I've changed, I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again

Christian."

I deleted all my Mexican friends numbers from my phone, now i have no Juan

I can count on both hands how many times that has happened to me. Twice.

for the day that's in it....

our good friend's Paddy & Mick were looking through a catalogue

Paddy says:

Begob! would you look at the women in this they're gorgeous and their prices are reasonable to!

Mick agrees with Paddy and says

"Right i’m ordering one right now!"

A few days later Paddy says to Mick

"Has your woman showed up yet?"

“No” says Mick

"But it shouldn’t be long now her clothes arrived yesterday"😋

my last Paddy joke for the day that's in it....

Mary says to Paddy if you were stranded on a desert island who would you like most to be with you?”

“My uncle Mick” replies Paddy.

“What’s so special about him?” asks a disappointed Mary

“He’s got a boat,” says Paddy😋

Be careful when trying to gently squeeze the pump at the petrol station to stop it at €30.

I've just missed it and it went to €43.62.

I’m entering the worlds tightest hat competition.

Just hope I can pull it off.

Mostly air in the packets.