Sharing a table with a stranger

Prominent_Dawg · 09-11-2018 5:43pm #1

I’ve notice this seems to be the norm in other countries, It’s not something I’ve witnessed much here, but I’m not sure, maybe it’s normal in larger cities like Dublin, whereby strangers would just sit at your table without the slightest hesitancy, I mean off course I haven’t paid for the use of the table, but I’ve sat there with the intention of the comfort of the space to myself, maybe I’m just hypersensitive, but I find It so uncomfortable and invasive and will usually just leave as I like my space, would love to know others thoughts

o1s1n · 09-11-2018 5:44pm

Us Irish like our space. Don't dare sit beside me on a bus when there are other seats free, you freak! :pac:

kneemos · 09-11-2018 5:45pm

This at home or out?

.red. · 09-11-2018 5:46pm

Don't p!ss in the p!sser next to me either unless it place is full.

09-11-2018 5:46pm

Why not? Watching a sports event down at the local, I would have no hesitation in asking a stranger if said seat was vacant.

maxwell smart · 09-11-2018 5:46pm

kneemos wrote: »

This at home or out?

I'll be honest I find it more acceptable when I'm out than when I'm at home

helimachoptor · 09-11-2018 5:47pm

yeah irish people dont like sharing tables tbh, far more common on the continent and the US

brevity · 09-11-2018 5:48pm

Once they don’t want to talk to me I don’t see the problem.

messrs · 09-11-2018 5:48pm

Prominent_Dawg wrote: »

I’ve notice this seems to be the norm in other countries, It’s not something I’ve witnessed much here, but I’m not sure, maybe it’s normal in larger cities like Dublin, whereby strangers would just sit at your table without the slightest hesitancy, I mean off course I haven’t paid for the use of the table, but I’ve sat there with the intention of the comfort of the space to myself, maybe I’m just hypersensitive, but I find It so uncomfortable and invasive and will usually just leave as I like my space, would love to know others thoughts

I wouldn't mind if someone sat at at table I was already sitting but I wouldn't go and ask someone if I could sit at their table - that's just me been awkward though

Commanchie · 09-11-2018 5:50pm

I was in 37 Dawson street with the partner having a drink and 2 guys just moved in sat directly facing us on our table. I actually just gave them a nod and cracked a joke.

Why not share your table.

lawred2 · 09-11-2018 5:50pm

Prominent_Dawg wrote: »

I’ve notice this seems to be the norm in other countries, It’s not something I’ve witnessed much here, but I’m not sure, maybe it’s normal in larger cities like Dublin, whereby strangers would just sit at your table without the slightest hesitancy, I mean off course I haven’t paid for the use of the table, but I’ve sat there with the intention of the comfort of the space to myself, maybe I’m just hypersensitive, but I find It so uncomfortable and invasive and will usually just leave as I like my space, would love to know others thoughts

this entirely depends on the context

a busy pub - sit away
on busy public transport - sit away
anywhere with benches - sit away

however I wouldn't expect someone to join me were I sitting at a small table in a restaurant

Ronaldinho · 09-11-2018 5:52pm

Prominent_Dawg wrote: »

I’ve notice this seems to be the norm in other countries, It’s not something I’ve witnessed much here, but I’m not sure, maybe it’s normal in larger cities like Dublin, whereby strangers would just sit at your table without the slightest hesitancy, I mean off course I haven’t paid for the use of the table, but I’ve sat there with the intention of the comfort of the space to myself, maybe I’m just hypersensitive, but I find It so uncomfortable and invasive and will usually just leave as I like my space, would love to know others thoughts

Presume we're talking about cafes or similar. Wouldn't have a problem with someone sitting at my table if place was busy and I was by myself.

So long as they have decent table manners

Mint Sauce · 09-11-2018 5:55pm

Busy Pub, Cafe/Fast Food Joint, is this seat/spot free. Dont see an issue.

Prominent_Dawg · 09-11-2018 6:23pm

lawred2 wrote: »

this entirely depends on the context

a busy pub - sit away
on busy public transport - sit away
anywhere with benches - sit away

however I wouldn't expect someone to join me were I sitting at a small table in a restaurant

I'm talking small intimate cafes

OldMrBrennan83 · 09-11-2018 6:24pm

I don't mind so long as they don't talk to me or don't take offence if I tell them not to talk to me.

railer201 · 09-11-2018 6:28pm

No problem, just ask the waiter/waitress for a long spoon.

buried · 09-11-2018 6:33pm

Happens all the time out the country here in the old timer eating houses, places where they serve boiled cabbage and shpare ribs and spuds and that sorta stuff for lunch. No problem, sit down next to anybody and stuff yer face. I go to a few places like this for lunch on work, always filled with old widowers and pensioners where they go for their grub. Good social outlet for them too, get a well cooked old fashioned meal and can chat to people at the tables. Lots of them out in the countryside here. They be goldmines

Prominent_Dawg · 09-11-2018 7:16pm

buried wrote: »

Happens all the time out the country here

I wouldn't up and leave if an elderly person sat next to me and showed interest in engaging with me, I’m not that cold, I think it’s more the idea of sharing personal space with a complete stranger for their comfort, at your inconvenience, than being spoken to that annoys me, like If I wanted to sit next to a stranger I would have chosen to

kerry37 · 09-11-2018 7:21pm

Only happened to me once. Popped into Quinlans fish and chip place in Killarney. Place was packed with a Q out the door. I was sat at a 2 person table alone and the guy working asked if I'd mind sharing with another guy who was solo.

Had a good chat with him. He was on holiday from America alone. Came to Ireland from Iceland and had crashed and wrote off a rental car over there. Spent 2 days in hospital and carried on his trip.

Seemed like a sound chap and wasn't awkward at all. Wouldn't have a problem asking someone to share a table if a place is crazy busy and would be more than happy to share if someone asked me

buried · 09-11-2018 7:22pm

Prominent_Dawg wrote: »

I wouldn't up and leave if an elderly person sat next to me and showed interest in interact with me, am not that cold, I think its more the idea of sharing personal space with a complete stranger for their comfort, at your inconvenience, than be spoken to that annoys me, like If I wanted to sit next to a stranger I would have chosen to

Yeah I hear ya, not saying its being cold or whatever to not want to share a table with someone, a lot of the time I need my space too! But out here, in the towns and villages I go through with work, you don't really have a choice but to sit next down to someone and get some grub, I only have the half hour so its find a space somewhere and eat a proper meal or else eat a three day old sandwich from a petrol station instead! Lots of these places the tables are set for four, so you'd have three or two strangers you have to sit next to, but nobody minds, you get chatting away and it's all good!

ZX7R · 09-11-2018 7:27pm

Prominent_Dawg wrote: »

I wouldn't up and leave if an elderly person sat next to me and showed interest in interacting with me, am not that cold, I think its more the idea of sharing personal space with a complete stranger for their comfort, at your inconvenience, than be spoken to that annoys me, like If I wanted to sit next to a stranger I would have chosen to

There is your problem, once you walk out your front door there is no more personal space to speak of.
Things are so busy nowadays you be lucky to find somewhere to eat at a table on your own

Rubberchikken · 09-11-2018 7:31pm

I couldnt care less. Have often done it. Never bothers me.

Alun · 09-11-2018 7:34pm

I wouldn't mind at all, but I'm a fairly gregarious kind of person who likes talking to strangers, if they want to talk to me that is. Have met some fascinating people over the years including an old fella on the bus the other day who, it turned out, used to fly flying boats!

In a previous life I used to travel a lot for work, and trust me, there's nothing worse than a dining room full of business people, each one sitting at their own table for two staring into middle distance looking as bored as hell. Some hotels I visited had special communal tables for that purpose, if you sat there you basically agreed to be sociable and chat with the others on the table. Seemed to work OK.

alchemist33 · 09-11-2018 7:45pm

This was common in Munich when we were there last December. Once we adjusted to speaking to each other a bit more quietly, it actually added to the atmosphere

ToddyDoody · 09-11-2018 7:54pm

I remember a Chinese in London that was just one big table which everyone sat around. I think there's a Japanese like that on O'Connell Street.

Not too long ago someone sat at our drinks table whereby mammy just froze in the position she was currently in and didn't move again until the bad lady was gone.

Ireland.

Edgware · 09-11-2018 8:03pm

As long as I am not expected to entertain some loser Johnny no mates

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 09-11-2018 8:05pm

I used to go to a cafe in Dublin with very few tables and chairs, and I would never mind if someone shared the table with me but if I was in a big place and there was lots of free seats I’d be a bit like no sit somewhere else

The Legend Of Kira · 09-11-2018 8:18pm

Last winter in supermacs I was after ordering my food & sitting down at a table eating it on a saturday afternoon, I was sitting down about 5 minutes some fellow comes to my table with his teenage daughter & sits down at the other side of the table, just after he sits down he looks over at me & " says you don,t mind us sitting here ? " I said " its not much point asking me that now that you ve sat down there, " there was an awkward silence for the next few minutes-once I finished my food I left. I don,t care how busy somewhere might be or if all the tables are full just wait for a table before ordering whatever you re ordering, its ignorant to sit down at a table next to someone you don,t know uninvited - they might be waiting for a friend to come join them or they might want their own space.

Wibbs · 09-11-2018 8:21pm

brevity wrote: »

Once they don’t want to talk to me I don’t see the problem.

Patww79 wrote: »

I don't mind so long as they don't talk to me or don't take offence if I tell them not to talk to me.

Jaysus, a bit misanthropic, no?

Alun wrote: »

I wouldn't mind at all, but I'm a fairly gregarious kind of person who likes talking to strangers, if they want to talk to me that is. Have met some fascinating people over the years including an old fella on the bus the other day who, it turned out, used to fly flying boats!

In a previous life I used to travel a lot for work, and trust me, there's nothing worse than a dining room full of business people, each one sitting at their own table for two staring into middle distance looking as bored as hell. Some hotels I visited had special communal tables for that purpose, if you sat there you basically agreed to be sociable and chat with the others on the table. Seemed to work OK.

This. I don't care if people sit down or if we get chatting. You can meet some cool people this way. Sure you get the odd weirdo, but sometimes even they're interesting enough. The only ones other than complete loons that would irritate me would be misanthropes. Life is too short to deal with self involved dour people.

Roger Hassenforder · 09-11-2018 8:22pm

maxwell smart wrote: »

I'll be honest I find it more acceptable when I'm out than when I'm at home

I find it very awkward when a stranger joins me at my table at home too.

uck51js9zml2yt · 09-11-2018 8:22pm

What's a table ??

Sharing a table with a stranger

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