One-Liner Jokes

Cozpyro · 01-08-2003 02:31PM

Originally posted by Capt'n Midnight

PS. anyone know Teresa Green ?

Nah, but I do know Logs Burn

Capt'n Midnight · 01-08-2003 02:39PM

Vic

Shell · 01-08-2003 04:16PM

3 blondes walk in2 a building
.
.
.
.
u think one of them wud o' seen it!!!

____________________________________________

There's a 'Mark' on my page ->

joseph brand · 04-08-2003 01:40PM

Two goldfish in a tank,
one turns to other . . . . . . . . . .

Three goldfish in a tank,
One turns to the others and says,
"Wheres MY seat belt"

This joke goes up to 11 goldfish!!!

penguinbloke · 04-08-2003 09:25PM

Patient: Doctor, doctor I can't feel my legs.

Doctor: Thats because I amputated your arms.

JackKelly · 05-08-2003 09:57AM

sound, this became a sticky while i was gone. They are some of the funniest jokes ive ever seen.

I can't remember if i said this.

Who is the leaded of the hankies?
The hankerchief

hohohohoho

Havelock · 05-08-2003 10:20AM

volentiarly edited, grumble

Sleipnir · 05-08-2003 10:32AM

I do believe dead baby jokes are banned. It's for one-liners, not sick jokes. Where's the Mod?

AL][EN · 05-08-2003 05:36PM

two fish swimming along one hits a conceate wall it turns to the other fish and says.................

DAMN!!!!

Michael Collins · 05-08-2003 06:05PM

Ha actually funny jokes for a change! Not mine now, everyone elses I mean...

Did you heard about the constipated mathematician?

He worked it out with logs...

Did you heard about the constipated mathematician?

He worked it out with a pencil...

Oriel · 06-08-2003 01:38PM

Alternatively...
Did you heard about the constipated mathematician?

He worked it out with a pencil, but it came out in logs...

irishman_abroad · 07-08-2003 02:09PM

A dyslexic man walked into a bra.....

Whats pink and hard?

A pig with a flick-knife

bozzie · 07-08-2003 07:27PM

dyslexia rules ko!!!

did ya hear about the red sauce chasing the brown sauce?
it couldnt ketchup

why did the one armed man cross the road
to get to the second hand shop

why did the rooster cross the road
to prove he wasnt a chicken

Sangre · 10-08-2003 02:10PM

What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud

What do you call a deaf man?
Anything you want, he can't hear you

Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Right where you left him

seveer · 10-08-2003 10:37PM

what do you say to a zen buddhist hot dog vendor ??

make me one with everything

loftus · 11-08-2003 06:43PM

What’s the difference between 365 condoms and a car tyre?

Ones a Good year the others a great year.

TeenStar · 12-08-2003 06:49PM

Why do prostitutes wear furry knickers?
Too keep their ankles warm

Whats brown and sticky?
A Stick

How do dinosaurs pay their bills?
With Tyrannosaurus checks.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
Because they have big fingers

What do u call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho Cheese

SHOOT ME QUICK

EricM · 14-08-2003 04:01AM

What did one coconut tree say to the other coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, there's a big blow job coming!

Kwizatz Anorak · 14-08-2003 02:21PM

The tower of Piza leans over to Big Ben and says "Have you got the time", big ben smiles and says back "I don't know, have you got the inclination"...

Pencapchew · 15-08-2003 05:45PM

Good move makin' this a sticky.

Did you ever hear about the magic tractor?

It went down a lane and turned into a field.

I'll get my coat.

WexCan · 17-08-2003 02:11PM

What do a blonde and a turtle have in common?

If they fall on their backs, they're ****ed.

avatar · 18-08-2003 10:45PM

Two blondes walk into a building.

Think about it.....

Shiminay · 19-08-2003 08:33AM

Folks - these are supposed to be ONE LINERS! A one liner does not take the format of Q & A...

mydarkstar · 20-08-2003 10:05PM

whats cold & white and falls from the sky?
.
.
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a fridge falling from an aeroplane

Vader · 20-08-2003 11:20PM

what does DNA stand for?

National Dyslexic Association

AL][EN · 21-08-2003 10:24AM

ooooooh one liners!!

like:

A Smith & Wesson ALWAYS beats four aces!!

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing

Drink 'till she's cute, but stop before the wedding

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines

I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film

Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them

I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy

Vader · 21-08-2003 07:24PM

whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff
whats red and fluffy? red fluff
whats blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath
whats white and fluffy? a cloud

The Beer Baron · 23-08-2003 11:40AM

Ok...
saddest joke of all time.

Two peanuts walking down a dark ally and one was a salted.

bwaaaahahahahahaha!!!

(wurst episode ever!)

littleninja · 23-08-2003 02:03PM

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms
Who pushed Johnny off the cliff? Not Sally

What's yellow and dangerous? Shark infested custard

NEWSFLASH: dyslexic troups have raided British Home Stores.... they heard bed linen was on the third floor.

The Beer Baron · 23-08-2003 05:20PM

Hands up who got these jokes from the Zig&Zag joke books. C'mon...admit it.

(Why did the lobster blush- because the sea weed- deary me)

One-Liner Jokes

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