Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Help Keep Boards Alive. Support us by going ad free today. See here: https://subscriptions.boards.ie/.
If we do not hit our goal we will be forced to close the site.

Current status: https://keepboardsalive.com/

Annual subs are best for most impact. If you are still undecided on going Ad Free - you can also donate using the Paypal Donate option. All contribution helps. Thank you.

Why are our Gardai "soft" looking?

  • 19-05-2017 12:06PM
    #1
    seachto7
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,863 ✭✭✭


    Well, I'm not saying all Gardai are soft looking, but there's a fair whack of them who could do with keeping away from the table and going to a gym.

    You look at them, and they don't look in any way threatening, or authoritative.

    I don't know if it's the uniform or what. They seem to wear these oversized reflective jackets which are horrible.

    I saw the police in action last week in Spain, and they don't f*ck about, and they actually look like they'd turn you over as well.

    In Italy, they prefer to look good, but will equally f*ck you up.

    I have seen Gardai in action, well able to handle themselves but not a whole lot.

    Too many stories in the news of Gardai getting assaulted.

    I have seen bangardai with arses the size of houses. (No good in a foot pursuit, let's be honest).

    Lots of pudgy youngfellas on the beat.

    I'm no oil painting myself.


«1345678

Comments

  • #2
    Dr. Kenneth Noisewater
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,234 ✭✭✭Dr. Kenneth Noisewater


    Give them free access to gyms and take them out from behind desks dealing with bullsh**t paperwork. They're being paid rubbish money and being made to work long hours on top of many of them having to commute, ending up with many subsisting on convenience foods. They don't lead anything like a healthy lifestyle.

    Also, give them a bloody uniform that is fit for purpose.

    I'm not a Garda btw.


  • #3
    gramar
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,045 ✭✭✭✭gramar


    Guards should be seven feet tall, with arms like tree trunks, eyes like steel, cold, hard and a shock of hair, red like the fires of hell.

    Failing that if you're not close to 6 feet and 14stone and look after yourself physically then you shouldn't be in the guards.


  • #4
    Caliden
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,981 ✭✭✭Caliden


    gramar wrote: »
    If you're not close to 6 feet and 14stone and look after yourself physically then you shouldn't be in the guards.

    Ever since they got rid of the height requirement most new recruits aren't intimidating enough to be taken seriously.


  • #5
    dashoonage
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,094 ✭✭✭dashoonage


    I blame Topaz....


  • #6
    Tangatagamadda Chaddabinga Bonga Bungo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,009 ✭✭✭Tangatagamadda Chaddabinga Bonga Bungo


    That Guard in that porno was "hard" looking. :)

    Seriously though (I think), they got rid of the mandatory strength test a number of years ago in the interest of equality and that. So a 5 foot 2, 8 stone person can join, and is expected to 'keep the peace'. :confused:


  • Advertisement
  • #7
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 25,909 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    The answer to the question is because they can get away with it.
    Go to Holland or Germany. Some cops are armed, some aren't. However there were none of them I'd think I'd have a good chance in a fight against.
    People like to idealise about having harmony and not having a physical "threat" as part of the police's powers but it's an ideal that doesn't bear out. Despite looking like they could destroy just about anyone I know I found the police there helpful and sometimes in Amsterdam they just stop for a chat.
    Compare that to here or England. Here we have Gardai a tad over 5 foot but looking about 12 stone. England last time I was there had heavily armed police in some areas. One of which was on her own, struggling to put lip-balm on for about 15 seconds with the end of the barrel of her rifle rubbing against her chin.


  • #8
    topper75
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,942 ✭✭✭topper75


    gramar wrote: »
    ... if you're not close to 6 feet and 14stone and look after yourself physically then you shouldn't be in the guards.

    But, but, but, ...human rights and equality?! how dare you!


  • #9
    seachto7
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,863 ✭✭✭seachto7


    I don't see the point of sending some bangardai out on the beat either. Call it equality if you like, but the ones I've seen woudln't be much use up against the likes of the Dundons and the likes, unless it's a case you need a female Garda to tackle a female scumbag?

    Gardai here should be made do self defence or boxing classes or the likes. Regular fitness tests. They'll be able to "keep the peace" then.

    Do you really think a bunch of scumbags brawling will be bothered about a 5ft Garda trying to break it up.....?


  • #10
    Parchment
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,203 ✭✭✭Parchment


    I often wonder about their capability to run after someone or tackle someone. I was in Greece recently and the police there were not to be messed with. Same in Poland - really fit and able police force.

    As a woman - i do think it was wrong for the height restriction to be removed unless youre some kind of powerhouse if your small youre not as useful in a fight/restraint situation as a taller person.


  • #11
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 17,925 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    The fitness test for entry is awful....... a 70 ear old could pass. There is no ongoing assessment.......... they are encouraged to keep it up or some such bull****.
    Deleted User wrote: »
    The answer to the question is because they can get away with it.......
    indeed, 100% agree, it's almost the culture to be a porky Garda, no pig pun intended

    Long hours etc no time to train is bollocks, many of them have other interests/occupations that take up time.

    A few months in templemore doesn't make them handy with the batton either.

    They are a joke for the most part, any AGS that think otherwise post a pic hiding your face to back up your point :)

    The males AGS are as good/bad as the females now and a porkey ban Garda with an appetite for a bag of crisps with the BLT and marsbar isn't rare judging by what you'd see strolling about the streets.


  • Advertisement
  • #12
    lazybones32
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,647 ✭✭✭lazybones32


    Our new garda station cost 3,000,000, has a gym and showers, has big tv (that someone was watching soccer all Thursday afternoon on - which means they have a satellite or chromecast) and they have lovely cells that cannot be used because the beds are 2 inches higher than they are supposed to be and it would violate H+S to put someone in there.
    Nothing soft about our crowd...


  • #13
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    The ones I know wouldn't be soft looking. I'm good friends with one who does a lot of boxing and kickboxing and goes for runs every day. I certainly wouldn't like to take him on on a Saturday night after the nightclub.


  • #14
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I haven't been home for a year has law and order has broken down in that time??


  • #15
    Tombo2001
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,860 ✭✭✭Tombo2001


    why do I read after hours.......its like the Daily Mail for 9 year olds.....


  • #16
    seachto7
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,863 ✭✭✭seachto7


    I wouldn't be too bothered about the height. Plenty of tough small people out there.

    But most I've seen are either too fat or too small, male and female. It's only a small few I've seen who look like they'd break you in half.

    I do think the old school Garda is starting to change though (no sense of humour, a Garda even when they're off duty, jobs on ths side etc) or am I wrong?


  • #17
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 17,925 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    The ones I know wouldn't be soft looking.................

    Well we aren't on about their c0cks now to be fair
    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=103554887


  • #18
    Gravelly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,094 ✭✭✭Gravelly


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    The ones I know wouldn't be soft looking. I'm good friends with one who does a lot of boxing and kickboxing and goes for runs every day. I certainly wouldn't like to take him on on a Saturday night after the nightclub.

    I'd have to agree - I know 4 guards fairly well, and I wouldn't fancy tangling with any of them (including one who's a woman).

    On a sort of related note, I passed a young guard on the street during the week and he had one of those ridiculous haircuts where the back and sides are shaved, but the top is long and greased back - was amazed he is allowed get away with it.


  • #19
    Your Face
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,275 ✭✭✭Your Face


    What would be 'hard-looking'?
    I'd rather a Garda be a short fat badass than a 6foot + bodybuilder who can't fight for poop.


  • #20
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 17,925 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Gravelly wrote: »
    I'd have to agree - I know 4 guards fairly well, and I wouldn't fancy tangling with any of them (including one who's a woman). ................

    But you are quite likely a law abiding citizen who wouldn't fancy tangling with anyone :)


  • #21
    silverharp
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,853 ✭✭✭✭silverharp


    they got rid of the height requirement and replaced it with a fitness test , I want my guards to be good ol' South Tipperary farmers sons, hulks of men. I mean if some 6'4 rugby player out of his head of drink and cocaine has you by the neck, who do you want coming to your rescue? also there is not much a female cop can do if someone doesn't want to cooperate

    Sweden looks worse if this is anything to go by

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKcYmIG-Uj0

    A belief in gender identity involves a level of faith as there is nothing tangible to prove its existence which, as something divorced from the physical body, is similar to the idea of a soul. - Colette Colfer



  • Advertisement
  • #22
    jester77
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,264 ✭✭✭✭jester77


    As laughable as it is, they have a very strict "dress code" that they must follow which means their hair has to be a certain length and facial hair is a no no. Otherwise they probably would not be able to do their job. This look then tends to lend towards a more soft look compared to police in other countries.


  • #23
    Dr Crayfish
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,960 ✭✭✭Dr Crayfish


    They really are pathetic looking. Their uniforms are absolutely ridiculous looking, not intimidating at all. I have seen knackers get the better of them a few times in town, rookies out on the streets. Maybe that's why you never seen them any more on the beat.

    Compare to German or Spanish cops. You just wouldn't f*ck around with them. They look so cool standing their with their shades, maybe even chewing on a cocktail stick.

    I think it's the more military style of their uniforms that makes them look hard, and you don't seem to see as many cherub faced ones.


  • #24
    seachto7
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,863 ✭✭✭seachto7


    Dr Crayfish wrote: »
    T

    Compare to German or Spanish cops. You just wouldn't f*ck around with them. They look so cool standing their with their shades, maybe even chewing on a cocktail stick.

    I think you're on about the George Michael video...


  • #25
    Gravelly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,094 ✭✭✭Gravelly


    Augeo wrote: »
    But you are quite likely a law abiding citizen who wouldn't fancy tangling with anyone :)

    True enough!


  • #26
    retro:electro
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 21,039 ✭✭✭✭retro:electro


    The police in Poland are very intimidating. As soon as you land in the airport they're there armed and scattered about the place. Arrive in Ireland and it's howya missus shockin weather. They wouldn't beat eggs


  • #27
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 25,909 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    silverharp wrote: »
    they got rid of the height requirement and replaced it with a fitness test , I want my guards to be good ol' South Tipperary farmers sons, hulks of men. I mean if some 6'4 rugby player out of his head of drink and cocaine has you by the neck, who do you want coming to your rescue? also there is not much a female cop can do if someone doesn't want to cooperate

    Sweden looks worse if this is anything to go by

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKcYmIG-Uj0
    I love that it was a non-cop (another migrant possibly) that was able to take him down.


  • #28
    gramar
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,045 ✭✭✭✭gramar


    anna080 wrote: »
    The police in Poland are very intimidating. As soon as you land in the airport they're there armed and scattered about the place. Arrive in Ireland and it's howya missus shockin weather. They wouldn't beat eggs


    Everytime in Dublin airport passport control I get a warm smile and 'Thanks Gramar'...never fails. They'll be passing me out a mug of tea with the passport next.


  • #29
    Parchment
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,203 ✭✭✭Parchment


    anna080 wrote: »
    The police in Poland are very intimidating. As soon as you land in the airport they're there armed and scattered about the place. Arrive in Ireland and it's howya missus shockin weather. They wouldn't beat eggs

    We got stopped in Poland at a checkpoint - just a regular checkpoint. They were armed to the teeth.


  • #30
    positron
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,451 ✭✭✭positron


    OP suggesting we should recruit from outside Ireland? Follow Ryanair's lead?

    Not a bad idea... Okay it is a bad idea.


  • Advertisement
  • #31
    seachto7
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,863 ✭✭✭seachto7


    positron wrote: »
    OP suggesting we should recruit from outside Ireland? Follow Ryanair's lead?

    Not a bad idea... Okay it is a bad idea.

    Isn't there a recruitment ad on the radio at the moment? Get the Polish lads on board.... :)


Advertisement