How do you feel about T-Girls?

Rozie

damien.m wrote:

Ever licked a dog's balls?

I'm highly, and deeply insulted, at that comment.

Basically, I'm as disgusting compared to "Normal" people as a slimey, bloated, sweaty, poop covered Dog's bollocks is to Cheese.

I'll remember that one. And sure, "that's not what i meant it was just an example", but you still chose to use that one. A normal foodstuff that is widely accepted and eaten is not comparable to something that everyone stays away from, and with good hygenic reason, too, at any rate.

And okay, so one person MIGHT under limited circumstances... sort of... maybe might go out with one. But still compared to the number of people that have posted here, it's hardly "Some", now is it? A teeny bit more on near "Nearly all", don't you think?

damien

Rozie whatever. You are choosing to play the victim card but you really have the wrong audience. Get off your cross will ya?

Rozie

damien.m wrote:

Rozie whatever. You are choosing to play the victim card but you really have the wrong audience. Get off your cross will ya?

Sorry, I'm just more than a little peaved thay my dating pool is almost non existant and everyone is acting like that's the way it's meant to be.

fortysixand2

Rozie wrote:

everyone is acting like that's the way it's meant to be

Jesus H, Rozie. You seem to put in a full-on EFFORT at misinterpreting what's said to you.

Stark

Rozie wrote:

If not one person in this forum would go out with a T-Girl, what do you think my chances are like? Honestly.

Honestly? The vast majority of people who tend to post here are gay men whereas you consider yourself a woman.

PhantomBeaker has already said in one of his posts that he knows a few people who have gone out with T-girls. I know a lesbian girl who has gone out with a pre-op T-girl. There are people out there who dig transsexual people, they're just not posting here right now.

Also you can never know if you'll be attracted to someone based on a hypothetical scenario. Sure I can look at a guy and say "he's hot" or whatever, but I'll only develop a strong attraction if I get to know a person. And I like a previous poster said, once that happens, you start to notice features you find physically attractive that you didn't before.

Rev Hellfire

I think Rosie wants everyone to tell them that it’s all going to be ok. The simple fact is society’s perception of your particular situation is against you.
I can only speak from the heterosexual perspective but very very few people will accept you as a woman, I for one certainly don’t. It doesn’t me a bad person for thinking that or make you a bad one either for wishing it wasn’t the case, but that’s the cards you’ve been dealt, so deal with it.
Although people are not obliged to be accept you as a ‘woman’, but they should at least be civil.
But that’s not to say there aren’t people out there who share the same perspective, but if you approach people with a self obsessed negative outlook, people will shy away regardless of their opinion on this particular matter.

Anyway I honestly think if you're getting this depressed about it you should at least seek professional consoling.

ixoy

Indeed Rozie, you can't ask questions of people and then give out when they're not the answers you want. Most pointedly here is the fact that we are, in the majority, gay men so of course we're not going to date a woman - transsexual or otherwise.

Part of the problem also is that it's a topic not covered all that much. Indeed I can only recall it being covered in "Nip/Tuck" (currently dealing with the topic in its new third season) with any proper degree of seriousness (it actually comes up in quite a few episodes and, I think, it's handled with a fair degree of sensitivty).

Rozie

If you're gay men, then why are you replying...? Not that you're not entitled to your view, but it's not as if I'd expect you to be - I'd be quite glad if gay men weren't attracted to me because that would mean I would be somewhere near being a woman.

The majority of the people that have been responding to this though, seem to be straight or female.

damien

ixoy is only straight acting dear. The only straight thing about him is his ruler that he uses every morning.

Boston

Rozie wrote:

The majority of the people that have been responding to this though, seem to be straight or female.

2 straights, 2 Bisexuals, 1 female, and the rest gay, to the best of my knowledge.

Rozie

LiouVille wrote:

2 straights, 2 Bisexuals, 1 female, and the rest gay, to the best of my knowledge.

Hmm...

Wibbs

Rozie wrote:

If you're gay men, then why are you replying...?

Well the name of the forum might just give the game away, in fairness. If you didn't want gay men to respond why post here? Just looking for attention and validation perhaps. You seem to want everyone to be against you. Fine you're going the right way about it. People have tried to be supportive, yet when they are you don't want to listen. You've already made your mind up. Great that's really working out for you, isn't it?

The majority of the people that have been responding to this though, seem to be straight or female.

Tourists like myself no doubt. In any case as you've pointed out it's those categories you want to think that t girls are attractive. It seems most have a problem with going out with someone like you. Whoop de doo, get over it. Hell I have a face like a bulldog lickin pi*ss off a nettle when compared to George Clooney. I don't lose sleep over the fact my "dating" opportunities are less than his.

The fact is most straight guys want a "natural" woman. Most not all. No amount of surgery is going to change that(if most gynacologists can't tell the diff, may I suggest a change in doctors). Somebody out there won't care. You may have to look hard to find them, but it's very possible. It won't be possible if you act like the way you write however. Your immature attitude would try the patience of a saint. I hate to have to use the immature card at any stage, but if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck.......

As I pointed out(twice IIRC), I know someone who was in exactly the same boat as you who has done very well for herself, yet again you chose to ignore anything that goes against your own very self destructive world view. Sure she had problems, but now she's fine. Mainly because she refused to let wether she had balls or not to define who she was. Precisely the opposite of what you're doing.

I'm with the Rev on everything he wrote. Quite honestly Rozie, what's between your ears is the problem far more than what's between your legs, willy or no.

chump

Rozie... here's how I see it...

You had a gender identity issue.
You had two choices:
You could continue to live with the body you were born with and reach a compromise between what body you had, and what you felt you should have.

The alternative option was to attempt to change your body to match your perceived gender identity and become a t-girl. (note become a t-girl, not a girl)

The rub with the latter is that you were not going to become a "girl", you were always going to become a t-girl.

Now with both there are problems.
For the internal strife of the first option, there is the social stigma of the second. And of course a range of other issues.

Now it seems having made your decision you can't accept the consequences?

Straight men (I'm not going to say by-and-large, because any deviation is an "exception", and there are exceptions for everything) are not likely to go out with other men, or women who used to be men.

This is just a human nature. Men want to nicest freshest woman they can get their hands on & get on with as well...

So I don't really understand how you ever thought otherwise.
Did you think you were actually going to become a "girl" after the transition?
I don't know what definition there is for being a "girl" - but surely there is a distinction between a person born as a girl and a person born as a man, but who altered their body shape and mechanics to become a girl.

Now while I feel your pain at not being born "right", and of having it tough - I feel it no more than a person born with a medical/physical issue that will affect them in their lives.

And if everyone of them was to have a go at the world and have as much anger as you ...

Ya'know it wouldn't be good

You made a call in life, deal with it, I'm sure the boys&grrls on here would help you out if you wanted to get back on a positive track.

Annasopra

First off I think some people have been a bit offensive towards Rozie

But it's not some! It's nearly all. There a VERY important difference there. If it was "some", the things everyone is saying would make perfect sense. But there are so few people who will. Not ONE person in this topic has said they will. Am I a bad person for thinking there might be a deeper reason to that?

Rozie - most of the replies in here have been gay men so you can't use that as a basis - you say nearly all people would refuse to go out with a T-Girl - that tells me that some people would but your negative mindset can't see that. I don't think you are a bad person for thinking there are deeper reasons - I just think that dwelling on the reasons too much is holding you back reinforcing many negative thoughts.

For example I could think like this - only 10% of the population is gay therefore it's going to be impossible for me to find someone who likes me because I'm gay and fat and bald and don't have the same interests as people my age - Nobodie's ever going to like me - I'm going to end up alone - and I do think that way way a lot of times but then I remind myself that there can be someone there for me - that some people do find me attractive.

What I'm trying to say is I can understand to an extent where you are coming from but your mindset in thinking is set that you can only think negatively - lot's of people hear said they accept MTF trans-sexuals for who they are but you seem to think that we're not accepting

BTW I like cheese - I like cheddar, brie, parmesan, feta, mozzarella and lots of others

Boston

Some people have been offensive towards rozie, while others have been offensive towards transexuals. I don't mind the first but the second is uncalled for, posts should be edited and people warned.

Stark

JohnnyMcG wrote:

BTW I like cheese - I like cheddar, brie, parmesan, feta, mozzarella and lots of others

Swiss, gouda, edam, goats cheese, cream cheese, mmm cheese.

I think many people have an idea of what a post-op transsexual might look like as well, people tend to have an image more of this:



than of this:



You really can't judge what someone's reaction to a T-girl is going to be, until they're actually faced with a T-girl and attraction decides to take its course or not.

PhantomBeaker

Stark wrote:

PhantomBeaker has already said in one of his posts that he knows

*cough* *makes glare-ish faces at Stark, offers him a red bull and goes back to staring and glaring*

But yeah, cheese - Mature Cheddar is something I cannot resist. Feta can be good. I like some of it on a cracker along with some dog balls... they have a certain cheese associated with them doncha know. :P

Seriously though, on the cheese analogy, I didn't like mushrooms until about 2 years ago (before any comments are made it's the common household Agaricus bisporous) - eventually I decided to try some raw, after studying fungi in college (for the record, it was the chitin that sold me - I don't know why, but once I could imagine the crunch of the chitin I was ok). I still can't stand 'em cooked in any way, but raw is fine.

To be honest, I think Stark's right about the conceptions of trans-girls. People expect something out of the League of Gentlemen... and while some people do look that way there are occasionally people who don't and can look bloody marvelous. For example there's a documentary on in the US called Trans Generation which gives a fairly accurate account of trans youth - one mtf fits the general stereotype of a young male to female tranny: passes quite well, nerd, computer science major, anime nerd, and has a thing for DDR. Ok, I don't have a thing for DDR, but the rest, sadly yes (well, I don't know how well I pass, but I'm in an interesting situation in that regard).

That's a stereotype that hasn't gone public yet because people still see the older generation of blonde-wig wearing people with strong jawline and orange foundation that's applied with a trowel.

As a rambling aside: As medical therapy becomes more available, and as more information becomes available over the internet about such things, the people who feel they're TS or in some way TG have opportunities that the older generation just didn't have available to them at that age, so you are dealing with what is pretty much a different breed (not trying to sound superior or anything, just different) to what the public has seen to date. So that'll probably challenge people's ideas of what a tranny looks like. Drawing on my own life, I know that some people have actually *said* that I don't look like the typical kinda T-girl that they'd expect. Yet, I know a lot of t-girls my age who look better than me.

Of course, they'd probably not be as open with being trans so the old idea of what a tranny looks like will persist - it's a useful decoy, if people think that's what a tranny looks like, people won't wonder about them.

Anyway, I ramble, so I'll stop.

Take care,
Aoife - *still glaring at Stark*

Annasopra

Some people have been offensive towards rozie, while others have been offensive towards transexuals. I don't mind the first but the second is uncalled for, posts should be edited and people warned.

I personally think both being offensive towards Rozie or making offensive comments about trans sexuals, transgendered people are uncalled for

Annasopra

Lesbian/Gay/Bisexual sweetie. I don't see a T in there. Funny, I don't see an S in there either, I guess we both shouldn't be posting here

1. Straight posters are not banned here
2. As per the charter This board relates to LGBTQ (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgendered, Questioning) issues

Rev Hellfire

I don’t think anyone has been offensive to transsexuals; the question was 'How do you feel about T-Girls'.
As for people been offensive to rosie, well I can see how the comments about their attitude could have been misconstrued, I certainly didn’t intend offence if it was taken, but I do honestly believe what you give out is reflected back to you and this is certainly true when meeting people.

Boston

Comments such as "Should have thought of that before getting your balls chopped off" are more then a little ignorant of the issues. As for being offensive to rozie, sure why not, she's being pretty bloody offensive, and seems to like it in return.

Hmm_Messiah

I really think the "objective" aspects of this issue have been covered now from all angless, and its deteriorated into something un-useful, in fact it seems to me to be only feeding a person's un healthy "mindset".

I think Damien is right in that there is some degree of "being the victim" going on here; but I also think its important to realise those people are often, to some extent at least, in fact vicitms, and people with less clouded perception might limit adding to that.

Boston

Are you subscribing to the notion that people are born victims messiah? I've read posts and replies to Rozie on more then this forum. Some of the replies have been truly hurtful, and fairly sickening. However, each time there would seem to be an invitation, or at the very least an expectation, of abuse. It's almost a self fulfilling circle. I would not wish to add to anybodies suffering, but I fear that lies and patronising her would only result in greater suffering in the long run.

Rozie

The fact is most straight guys want a "natural" woman. Most not all. No amount of surgery is going to change that(if most gynacologists can't tell the diff, may I suggest a change in doctors).

I actually find this extremely arrogant. How much do you actually know of SRS, yet you think you know more about it than someone who's been planning it for quite some time?

The only real reason I can think of is that you're scared to think that a transsexual could pass in front of an expert. You want there to be some hook, some tag that says "I wasn't born a guy."

There isn't. There are surgeons who can make a passable vagina, quite a few of them, deal with it.

As I pointed out(twice IIRC), I know someone who was in exactly the same boat as you who has done very well for herself, yet again you chose to ignore anything that goes against your own very self destructive world view.

I have a different world view. It happens in, you know, a word that has different kinds of people. It doesn't mean it's destructive or bad, it's just a different means to an end.

I'm with the Rev on everything he wrote. Quite honestly Rozie, what's between your ears is the problem far more than what's between your legs, willy or no.

I didn't come here to be recommended professional help.

chump wrote:

The alternative option was to attempt to change your body to match your perceived gender identity and become a t-girl. (note become a t-girl, not a girl)

I rather think that at best that's a matter of opinion. The fact that you made a point of it by "Noting" it, as if to rub it in my face, annoys me no end.

Did you think you were actually going to become a "girl" after the transition?

No, I thought I was a girl before it.

I don't know what definition there is for being a "girl" - but surely there is a distinction between a person born as a girl and a person born as a man, but who altered their body shape and mechanics to become a girl.

And, unfortunately for you, it's not something we like to be contained with the "girl" part. Anything else is extra.

Now while I feel your pain at not being born "right"

No you bloody well don't. Maybe some other people here do, but you've insulted me and/or transsexuality at least 3 times in your post so far, and possibly more was editted out.

Who are the people making the REALLY nasty comments though?

Rev Hammer wrote:

I don’t think anyone has been offensive to transsexuals;

That says a lot about your view on the matter, unfortunately...

Rev Hellfire

Troll-tastic !

You sir are a trolling genius.

Crucifix

Rozie wrote:

as if to rub it in my face

I would have said he was just emphasising the linchpin of his point.

Hmm_Messiah

LiouVille wrote:

Are you subscribing to the notion that people are born victims messiah? I've read posts and replies to Rozie on more then this forum. Some of the replies have been truly hurtful, and fairly sickening. However, each time there would seem to be an invitation, or at the very least an expectation, of abuse. It's almost a self fulfilling circle. I would not wish to add to anybodies suffering, but I fear that lies and patronising her would only result in greater suffering in the long run.

I don't understand you; I didn't advocate lies or patronising any-one; I suggested saying your piece (as you say she invited comment) but then discontinuing form something that, again as you say, she seems to expect, and in my opinion some negative part thrives on it.

I didn't suggest she was born a victim, but god yea course people are!! in 3rd world countries, totalitarian regimes etc. What i was suggesting is that even if she is playing a "negative role" out there is no doubt something very difficult/painful about physically being a different gender that she see's herself as. Why add to it, or play that game?

I know she seeems happy to continue some invitation to abuse, or at least negativity; my thoughts are that she is not in a place where she can be more "objective" and maybe those who can should .

Wibbs

Rev Hellfire wrote:

You sir are a trolling genius.

True, but I'll bite.

Rozie wrote:

I actually find this extremely arrogant. How much do you actually know of SRS, yet you think you know more about it than someone who's been planning it for quite some time?

Actually more than most, given somebody I know went through the procedure.

The only real reason I can think of is that you're scared to think that a transsexual could pass in front of an expert. You want there to be some hook, some tag that says "I wasn't born a guy."

TBH I don't really want nor care either way. Whatever floats yer boat really. What you want on the other hand is complete acceptance of your situation. Heads up for you, you won't get it.

There isn't. There are surgeons who can make a passable vagina, quite a few of them, deal with it.

I'm sure there are. Making a passable vulva however would be a good trick. "making" one of the most complicated externally visible structures in the human body would be a good trick indeed. While a very cursory glance might prove inconclusive, the suggestion that a medical expert in such things wouldn't immediately spot it is a bit of a stretch. Hell, I reckon I'd spot it, but than again maybe I've made too close a study of the matter....

I have a different world view. It happens in, you know, a word that has different kinds of people. It doesn't mean it's destructive or bad, it's just a different means to an end.

Well you might find a quicker end by that means. Your world view is very self destructive. Are you happy because of it? Is your life better for it? By your posts it seems not. It appears you would rather be right than happy.

I didn't come here to be recommended professional help.

Then why did you come in the guise of someone who by your posts clearly needs it? If you are for real and not a troll, then I would be concerned for you as your responses to posts by me and others suggests a unhealthy view of things. You jump on the bad while completely ignoring any good advice offered. In fact you never make a comment about the good stuff at all(PhantomBeakers posts spring to mind). You seem to need to be told it's all bad just so you can reinforce your original viewpoint. Good luck with that. As I said before you would rather be right than happy.

Hmm_Messiah

Jesus Christ!

Rozie: which question are you really asking, will peopple accept T-Girls as partners (In your OP even you conclude they won't and some how want some prince to prove otherwise) or would people accept you, Rozie?

Well the first has been answered , over and over, to be followed by truly inadequate and flawed responses from yourself.

As for the second, reread your own contribution here, and ask yourself who would want to take that on. Notice the reaction people have (in general) to you and ask why is that ?

You talk of just having a "different world view". Well I think even you somewhere realise thats not the full truth. But taking it as it is, and acknowledging you're allowed any view you wish, let me be as clear as i can be - if you do not change it, on your own, with reflection, or therapy, you will not be accepted , not because of your anatomy or gender, or any surgery, but because of what you call your different world view.


What others see as a possible troll, I see as some one who clearly needs some professional guidance. If you deny the need as you have, then I can only conclude you are indeed a troll, or just maybe your average crazy dude(tte)

Wibbs

^ Very well put Messiah. A more concise distillation of my ramblings I won't find.