Men No Longer Want to Date, Why?

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119166830#Comment_119166830

Ah yeah there's a difference between eating healthier and moving more vs people taking pics of their biceps/ass in the gym 🙄 those ppl wreck me. If you're going to gym, work out, it's not a photoshoot🙈

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167325#Comment_119167325

Hmmm. I think you misinterpreted me. I didn't mean it's easy, more like why do you care so much?

Is it notches on the bed post or a loving relationship you want?

Hego Damask

seriously ?

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167346#Comment_119167346

Are you an athletic super model?

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167379#Comment_119167379

Nope, but I'm a good looking woman. Anyway obvs theres more to men than looks.

Potential-Monke

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167374#Comment_119167374

I mistook you so, my apologies!

At the moment, not looking for anything, and if I could have my way, I'd find a partner with their own life who just wants someone else to spend a bit of time with every now and again. Having lived with 2 of my previous relationships (both 7 years long), living with someone is a sure fire way to kill any spark! Maybe it's just me, but I get sick of seeing the same people every day, and this extends to a partner (albeit not as quickly).

What I want is unrealistic. So I don't expect it. Nor do I go looking for it. I've basically given up because my interests are so different to most people, that the already tiny portion of available women that may be suitable with me is now even smaller. I don't have anything to offer as per modern expected standards, aside from monogamy, which also appears to be something that is on the way out.

I've tried it all, so either I'm not tall enough (most likely), not good looking enough (also a good contender, but I can't judge myself impartially), don't earn enough, don't have my own house... I'll probably die single, but later than most because of less stress!

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119166996#Comment_119166996

I see that argument a lot from people "People only have kids for selfish reasons". I had kids because I love my wife and I wanted to start a family with her. I get to mold my kids and watch them grow up. Having kids is the most fulfilling thing in the world but at times it can be so tough and you have to make a lot of sacrifices. I could probably afford a fecking Porsche if I didn't have kids 🤣

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167361#Comment_119167361

Got ya. And I quoted your later post with the super model quip. So apologies.

People are attracted to they want. My attraction, obviously initially its physical, but what I find physically attractive is different to other mates.. whatever floats your boat.

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167400#Comment_119167400

I had a little giggle at part of your post there. It's pretty much my relationship!

Are you fecking off to your dad's this weekend...I guess I am so darling! She wanted the gaff and bed to herself.

Guess what...that's cool. I don't love her, I absolutely adore her. It's our personalities. They just fit.

Right so. Tell me three things you are proud of in your life. You're focusing on the negative, or seem to.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167408#Comment_119167408

All g 😊

I get ya, attraction can be subjective, like what I find physically attractive in a man, my sister wouldn't. But no matter how 'hot' someone can be, if they have a very selfish/shady/unkind personality to go with it, im not interested. But again, rubbish to one person can be gold to someone else.

techman1

At some point, a man may take a pragmatic approach or stop giving a fcuk which ironically may draw some women onto him. Especially at age 35+ when men who were previously cast aside for being not good enough are now seemingly good enough. Problem is, at this age, men are not thinking with their cock as much as they did when younger and many available women have baggage i.e. another man's children.

I can vouch for that, very true. Getting much more attention from women now in my 40s than I ever did in my 20s. I used to fall for girls too easily then, its like female sexuality is over powering for young men. When you are older you don't have the same drive and women are actually more keen . Im still single yes but could easily be in a relationship now, obviously Covid wasn't much fun with dating opportunities and fun things all stopped.

Women having baggage ie children also comes with the territory, a woman with mixed race children would be a big no no though, you can't pass them off as your own

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167441#Comment_119167441

Exactly!

The thing is I apparently had an unusual taste in women, I didn't think so.

While the lads liked Pamela Anderson (who is pretty and ridiculous intelligent), I preferred Gillian Anderson, sigourney weaver (she fecked up an alien queen) and Carol vordarmann. Meh. My thing.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167470#Comment_119167470

All 4 women you just named there are hot.

Pamela was very hot in her day, Gillian Anderson is still a looker, Sigourney Weaver is in her 70s now but was a looker in her day and Carol Vodarmann... who hasn't had a crush on her? Your taste isn't that unusual mate 😅

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167470#Comment_119167470

Looks like you may have a thing for red heads 🤔 I love sigourney in the movie heart breakers! I think a lot of men fancy the women you listed too so don't think it's that unusual.

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167488#Comment_119167488

I suppose in essence what I found attractive was strong intelligent women (I know they were characters).

Still stihl waters 3

Too much easy sex, contrary to modern beliefs about forgetting about the past etc if a woman puts out on the first night especially after meeting on a dating site then very few men will have the need or want to see her again, that was my attitude anyway, if you organise a meetup through an app then don't be surprised if he doesn't bother contacting you after

Pubs I usually find are different as you may spend a few hours getting to know each other and build a rapport before getting balls deep, I've had several relationships from 1 night stands because you spend some time talking beforehand, but any lady that puts out after meeting through a dating app is bound for disappointment, "A key that opens many locks is a master key, a lock that's opened by many keys is just a shītty lock".

There's plenty men out there to that want relationships but the lure of easy sex is just too tempting and if she's putting out so easily to him even though he may wish to wait then he's probably thinking she's not worth the hassle and a pump and dump is better than nothing

Potential-Monke

I 100% focus on the negative, because that's all the feedback I ever get. All my life, from primary school onwards through my adult working life, people love putting you down. It eventually has an effect. Now, my choice of employment for 10 years didn't help, seeing the worst of society and how the bleeding hearts prevent people from actually answering for their crimes in any meaningful way, seeing the depth people would go to. I've a very negative view on life, which has led to me becoming more or less a hermit.

I have good qualities, but they're not immediately obvious, and without the looks and/or money, you're starting off on the wrong foot straight away. I'm not angry about it (anymore), I accept it for what it is. Christ, the only female to give me any attention in the last few years (outside of friends and family) is a girl working in the local shop (where my sister worked for a while so got to talking), and we appear to share quite a few interests. But I'm 39 and she's 23. That doesn't bother me at all, but I just couldn't be arsed dealing with other people about it and am most likely inventing scenarios.

I find I have far more in common with younger people in general, because most my age are in family situations with kids. I can't relate. I don't like kids at all. And I'm not into sport, fashion, history, nature or alcohol (and everything that goes with drinking). I know I limit myself, but I'm ok with that. Here's hoping the other posters saying the 40s is where it gets good are right! Less than a year to start finding out!

Also, I think what @gameoverdude was referring to, is that while the majority would fawn over PamAn, some of us saw zero attraction aside from the Barbie doll look and mahoooosive gazungas. I was the same. No interest in PamAn, but I was fawning over Christina Ricci.

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167492#Comment_119167492

Never thought of the red head angle! Never gone out with one.

I think I was more saying, and I haven't thought this through, but the classic big boobs, blonde hair and I'm just a girl routine is not for me. Again characters in a TV series!

My fiancee a foot smaller than me and way less than half my mass, but she'd kick my arse! Love it.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167532#Comment_119167532

Yeah that makes sense, far more interesting me thinks

Ha big things come in small packages as they say

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167520#Comment_119167520

Interesting.

Correct me if my interpretation of your post is wrong please. Women are sexual beings as well?

They don't want to leg over as well? To me and I'm just speaking for myself is that casual sex is a bit like masturbation with a bit more visual and tactial toppings.

gary550

I'm mid 20's, single and don't think that is changing any time soon.

Not sure what is it but I just don't have any interest in getting to know women my own age. Going to sound like I'm generalising but most in my experience they are all generic and boring and all seem to be living from the same script, doing the same things, dressing the same way and full of the same sh*te. The average looking ones think they are models, the good looking ones seem to come with issues that aren't worth even trying to contend with (along with a constant stream of attention from lads hornier and better looking and probably more biologically gifted than me). The genuine ones are mostly all taken 😂.

Relationships nowadays also seem to be disposable reels to show others on social media, no deeper meaning in a vast majority. Not just me who seems to think it either, I was only talking to a mate about it last week and he was mentioning the same stuff as me and he'd be a lot more active in actually pursuing women than me.

I'd rather build my businesses and work on my own stuff than complicate my life at the minute. Time is a major issue now too for me which I suppose plays a part.

I never actually thought I'd say it but the most attractive, settled and decent women I've met lately are in their mid/late 30's which is a problem cause a lot of them are looking for men their own age. Most have kiddos aswell which is eh... "baggage". I'd probably want a mini me or two at some point aswell so meeting a woman with 2 kids already and me creating two kids with her means I'll have to get a people carrier to haul them all around - I'd rather my mode of transport be a bike with an anal plug for a saddle than a people carrier, it's just not my gig.

Then again I could be just an un-self-aware ugly b*stard either but hey ho, I'll never know.

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167548#Comment_119167548

Love your username.

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167529#Comment_119167529

Please quote me. I'd like your post to be seen to me so I can rely and not miss it.

Again, what are the 3 things you are proud of yourself about (no feckin negatives in your next post!)

Oh, I can certainly tell you what I'm not happy about about myself. But quid pro quo clarrise!

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167568#Comment_119167568

Ha thanks😆

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167520#Comment_119167520

Mate, I am male 32 and married for 6 years and in a relationship now for 15 years. But what you said:  "A key that opens many locks is a master key, a lock that's opened by many keys is just a shītty lock".......... Come on, that is just weird and creepy.

Women can like sex, women aren't some lock that you own or something. There is not one thing wrong with a single woman sleeping around and having some fun if that is what she wishes. You are talking like you were born in the 1940s or something 😂

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167601#Comment_119167601

I can Google stuff to help you with that pissy part.

Liberty_Bear

I am in a similar position to the OP but from a gay POV. Ive loved sleeping around the last couple of years but its become empty. Feels lonely at the best of time (dont get me wrong my right hand saves the day all the time) however there are very few people who appear to want to know each other . Im a hugley social creature, maybe Im a bit intimidating as I am always out and about and being a big guy and probably appearing gergarious puts people off! Humans these days are a commodity. I can go online now and get the ride no questions asked, if I want something more profound...well thats the golden goose and the golden egg! The lonliness if a pox..(is that monkey pox?)

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167567#Comment_119167567

I think the best thing you can do is predominantly focus on you and your career/businesses. Wish I had that sense in my 20s though instead of prioritising college/career, I was too busy distracted by men. The right woman will come along if and when the time is right,a lot of that is unfortunately out of your control.

gameoverdude

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167628#Comment_119167628

Please correct me, there is a lot sexual stuff here, but you wish for complete unadulterated trust in a future relationship?

gary550

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119167611#Comment_119167611

The second bit is a bit of an enigma, nothing wrong with women liking sex and having lots of it but for a lot of lads it does have some distortion on desirability.

I'll give my example - I know this girl from years ago who is reasonably good looking and a decent ish person. I also know she got a train ran on her by like 12 lads one night at a house party 😂 everytime I see her it's the first thing that comes to my mind and literally kills any desirability you could have for her.