I don't know where we're going, but I know where I am (part 10)

Purple Mountain

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Tldr...dodgy box.😂

You better watch out for the lesbians in prison.
Unless you're due a walk on the other side of the road.

Samsgirl

Sephiroth_dude wrote: »

*Slides bowl over to sam*

:pac:

Gotta be quicker with the bowl.. nom, nom, nom...

I says

Fingers, haven’t smelled them since my teenage disco years :):)

I says

I says wrote: »

Fingers, haven’t smelled them since my teenage disco years :):)

Bejaysus!!

Sephiroth_dude

Samsgirl wrote: »

Gotta be quicker with the bowl.. nom, nom, nom...

kowloon

Got asked by a woman what I would consider dark humour, said I wouldn't be too keen on rape jokes and she called me a misogynist and switched off her messaging. It shouldn't bother me what a stranger on the internet thinks but it really does. Was mentioning a topic that crosses the line for me be misogynist in itself? Where did I screw up?

Leg End Reject

kowloon wrote: »

Got asked by a woman what I would consider dark humour, said I wouldn't be too keen on rape jokes and she called me a misogynist and switched off her messaging. It shouldn't bother me what a stranger on the internet thinks but it really does. Was mentioning a topic that crosses the line for me be misogynist in itself? Where did I screw up?

You're walking a tight line mentioning rape jokes, rape is naturally an emotive topic.

I'm incredibly unpc, but I know to tone my humour down in certain situations. If you're chatting to potential dates you're better off steering clear of potentially controversial topics. If you're asked that question again be vague and say it depends on the situation and how well you know the people involved, but that generally you're not overly controversial.

Tone and context can be easily misconstrued via text so it's always best to err on the side of caution.

Having said that my impression of you is that you do have a dark sense of humour, so this lady may not have been for you. At least you're not wasting time and getting your hopes up.

Have you thought any more about a trip to Wales? Getting each other's humour through text is a promising start!

Purple Mountain

kowloon wrote: »

Got asked by a woman what I would consider dark humour, said I wouldn't be too keen on rape jokes and she called me a misogynist and switched off her messaging. It shouldn't bother me what a stranger on the internet thinks but it really does. Was mentioning a topic that crosses the line for me be misogynist in itself? Where did I screw up?

I'm confuddled.. Surely if you were a misogynist then you'd be cracking the rape jokes?
She sounds like hard work, delete and move on.
Online dating sounds like a mine field.

kowloon

Purple Mountain wrote: »

I'm confuddled.. Surely if you were a misogynist then you'd be cracking the rape jokes?
She sounds like hard work, delete and move on.
Online dating sounds like a mine field.

I don't get it myself.
I initially gave a reply saying I generally don't offend anyone and that I wouldn't look to. I said humour is also something you tailor to the person.
Actual exchange:

Her: Right, so are you planning on answering the question or just intellectualising and thus avoiding it? I'm aware humour is subjective, hence why I specifically asked what constitutes dark humour to you.

Me: I'm so in a corner right now. I think I wouldn't be too keen on the likes of rape jokes, that would cross the line I think.

I hate the idea that someone thinks I'm like that and leaves me unable to reply.

Leg End Reject

kowloon wrote: »

I don't get it myself.
I initially gave a reply saying I generally don't offend anyone and that I wouldn't look to. I said humour is also something you tailor to the person.
Actual exchange:

Right, so are you planning on answering the question or just intellectualising and thus avoiding it? I'm aware humour is subjective, hence why I specifically asked what constitutes dark humour to you.

I'm so in a corner right now. I think I wouldn't be too keen on the likes of rape jokes, that would cross the line I think.

I hate the idea that someone thinks I'm like that and leaves me unable to reply.

Yeah, she was a melter looking to get you to offend her.

I wouldn't waste any more time worrying about it.

If it's hard work before you actually meet, it's not going to get better.

Gremlinertia

Jeez, that one was looking for a fight feels like..

Purple Mountain

Bring back the discos and the awkward shouting over music and trying to lip read at the bar

Purple Mountain

BTW.. Her style of conversation comes across as trying to sound interesting, intelligent etc.
There's nothing wrong with those qualities but it's a bit stuffy for an online chit chat with a newbie.

Leg End Reject

Purple Mountain wrote: »

Bring back the discos and the awkward shouting over music and trying to lip read at the bar

The slow set! It was a lot easier then, all you had to do was shuffle around in a circle and wear the face of each other. They were always there the next night too.

kowloon

She seemed really interesting from her bio. Maybe I'm a little easily disturbed but having anyone believe I purposely wanted to offend them is something I don't like. Although being a ****ty communicator and judge of people's reactions did land me in this thread, so I definitely do it.

Am I on the spectrum or something?

Purple Mountain

You're over thinking it.
Go to bed and start again tomorrow.
Good night night owls.

Gremlinertia

I second Purple, as hard as it is, just wasn't for you. Online dating is horrible in that you 'meet up' with a larger number of people so the number of rejections and mismatches is higher

Leg End Reject

kowloon wrote: »

She seemed really interesting from her bio. Maybe I'm a little easily disturbed but having anyone believe I purposely wanted to offend them is something I don't like. Although being a ****ty communicator and judge of people's reactions did land me in this thread, so I definitely do it.

Am I on the spectrum or something?

It's the internet, you can't use it as a barometer of your social skills.

I don't think you've offended people here and I don't think most of us are awful people.

I've never tried online dating sites but I've read a lot of posts like yours about them. Maybe hold off until life returns to normal and get out and about? Join clubs, group activities and the like. If it's making you doubt yourself and affecting your self esteem it won't end well.

She was a bit much Kowloon!

Anywho.. speaking of fingering...

I just got up to get some water and noticed I'd left the big clothes horse/airer contraption up so for some reason I decided to dismantle it but I was clearly too sleepy for such a gigantic endeavor because I managed to get my finger trapped. The more I tried to open it back up, the further I closed it down and my finger was getting properly squashed! Of course I started panicking as the pain intensified and that made things much worse and somehow, someway I kept folding it further in on itself and my finger.

Well obviously I lived to tell the tale but my finger has a big ol indent on it and is throbbing and I probably won't be able to get back to sleep for some time. I should just join the circus, I'm a bumbling clown!!

I have no clue what you're like in real life Kowloon, but I can tell you the problem in that exchange was hers not yours. Don't waste another thought on it.

Leg End Reject

That's a different take on fingering, Buile! If it's throbbing (oooh matron!) keep it elevated.

kowloon

I was in bed ready to clock off and was just checking messages. Going to read for a bit and try to not let this bother me so much. Thanks for the advice.

Leg End Reject

Leaba time for me is long overdue, you'll have to mind the place Grem.

Gremlinertia

Five hours patrol, lovely :rolleyes:

Gremlinertia

Sentry shift over, it's sunny, what to do?.

Mike Hough

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Sentry shift over, it's sunny, what to do?.

Pints?

Gremlinertia

Mike Hough wrote: »

Pints?

Maybe later on.. First couch and a ponder..

smurfjed

Nespresso on the balcony with the mutt hiding inside the air conditioned room. My favourite time of the day.

Ted_YNWA

Deskside, procrastinating is strong today.

Phoenix32

So tomorrow is moving day.....most stuff done but still some bits to do.

Wondering if I left my invisibility cloak on.

@Kowloon, it seems to me that woman was quite abrasive and was looking to be offended. I don't see how finding rape jokes dark humour is misogynistic. You'd be better off steering well clear of her anyway, she sounds like a head wrecker.