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My husband is a fussy eater, I need help
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Yep! Over the last decade, I have met hundreds of French women who are treated this way by their husbands, and I've met the husbands too . It's definitely not (just) and Irish Mammy thing.Cocobeans101 wrote: »Maybe this is some sort of French thing ...
Those are almost the exact same words used by a (Bretonne) woman with whom I had a argument on this subject two weeks ago.I didn't realise it was that much of big deal, the way i am with him, i know it wasn't right the way he is acting sometimes but should we not cook for our husband? For me it is normal, it's kind of my duties
She's very "feminist" but said she'd find it difficult to get a weekend assignment done because she'd have to cook for her family when she got home from the week-long course we're doing.
When I asked her how she could defend her feminist ideals, and then go home to a husband and three teenagers who'd been off school for a week, and had another week's holiday ahead, she said it was her duty as a mother. :eek:
Anyway, I'm another hardliner in this regard: dinner is served - at the table - and anyone who says they don't like it is told to look after themselves - and that includes vistors. I don't do the typically Irish thing, though, of piling a portion of everything on everyone's plate and then saying "eat up". We've adopted the French practice of having large bowls from which everyone takes a portion to suit themselves. This means I can order the fussy eaters who say "I don't like [whatever]" to at least taste it without coming across as too mean! :pac:
BTW - if he can't leave the bathroom tidy after giving a child a bath (before coming down and cooking dinner for all of you
), I'd rate him as a lazy, pathetic fecker. My mammy raised me to be a better dad/uncle than that! 0 -
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CelticRambler wrote: »Y
Those are almost the exact same words used by a (Bretonne) woman with whom I had a argument on this subject two weeks ago.
She's very "feminist" but said she'd find it difficult to get a weekend assignment done because she'd have to cook for her family when she got home from the week-long course we're doing.
When I asked her how she could defend her feminist ideals, and then go home to a husband and three teenagers who'd been off school for a week, and had another week's holiday ahead, she said it was her duty as a mother. :eek:
Anyway, I'm another hardliner in this regard: dinner is served - at the table - and anyone who says they don't like it is told to look after themselves - and that includes vistors. I don't do the typically Irish thing, though, of piling a portion of everything on everyone's plate and then saying "eat up". We've adopted the French practice of having large bowls from which everyone takes a portion to suit themselves. This means I can order the fussy eaters who say "I don't like [whatever]" to at least taste it without coming across as too mean! :pac:
BTW - if he can't leave the bathroom tidy after giving a child a bath (before coming down and cooking dinner for all of you), I'd rate him as a lazy, pathetic fecker. My mammy raised me to be a better dad/uncle than that!
I guess that's how french people act around their husband... i'm not the only oneCheerful Spring wrote: »What did his mother feed him when he was growing up?
His mother passed away a couple of years ago, she was cooking for everyone at home. My husband told me several time, he hated what she was making, but had no choice to eat it, so that won't be helpfull0 -
We would take turns depending on who’s working later but in your case maybe it is fair that you do most of the cooking during the working week seeing as you’re already in the house. So in saying that, does he cook much at the weekend????
He does some cooking, maybe once a month, he likes cooking roast chicken, with stuffing that's really tasty the way he does it
And he likes baking rhubarb crumble
It's a pity he doesn't cook more often, it's really nice when he does itIt's roughly dinner time now I reckon.
Well OP, how did giving him a swift kick up in the bollox go?
Yep, it didn't go well...
So told him things needs to change, from now on he needs to prepare his own meal if he doesn't want to eat the same than me
He said he doesn't like food, and doesn't know anything about it, i'm the one that know all about it so i should be the one do the cooking.
I told him i don't know much about food either, all i do is simple stuff
I offer to look at some recipes book to give him some ideas, but he doesn't want
I asked him to swich places for a week, he will be the one doing all the cooking to see how it goes, he refused straight away saying he doesn't want to do it he hates cooking, so i told him i don't like it either, why should i be the one in charge, why not him? i'm not his maid but his equal partner, he should be the one helping with the cooking not the other way around because with the pregnacy i'm really tired all the time, so that's would be nice if he could help
He got upset (as planned) saying all i do is shouting at him, he is always the one to be blamed for everything, and he shut down, took his laptop and went on it, that was the end of the talk for him.. I kept on for a little while but he just blanked me...
And was not talking to me anymore.
So i just went off for a couple of hours, when i got home i could hear him saying to our son FINALLY from upstairs
He came down and still didn't talk to me
So i start cooking (frankfurt sausages wrap in ham, with a homemade tomato sauce made with a bechamel sauce and tomato puree and some cheese)
After i put it in the oven and told him what i prepared i asked him if would like to eat what i was eating, he answered me in a rough tone NO
I then said, that's fine, then make your own arrangement for your dinner, i'm having this.
Maybe 10 min later, he came in the kitchen asking what was in the recipe, after explanation, he said, there nothing else to eat so i don't have the choice i'll have to eat it!
And ate it, and liked it, he wouldn't admit it but he did, he got 2 servings
And we all ate at the table
It's a 1st in a long time yeahh
He was a bit jealous of my son having nuggets for his supper, but it was going to be too much for him to try this, i'll need to start little by little with him, he knows tomorrow he going to have try carrot and chicken with his pasta
So at the end, my husband is still upset at me for "forcing him" to eat and blaming him for everything, he is still really cold with, but we're getting there!0 -
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He does some cooking, maybe once a month, he likes cooking roast chicken, with stuffing that's really tasty the way he does it
And he likes baking rhubarb crumble
It's a pity he doesn't cook more often, it's really nice when he does it
Yep, it didn't go well...
So told him things needs to change, from now on he needs to prepare his own meal if he doesn't want to eat the same than me
He said he doesn't like food, and doesn't know anything about it, i'm the one that know all about it so i should be the one do the cooking.
I told him i don't know much about food either, all i do is simple stuff
I offer to look at some recipes book to give him some ideas, but he doesn't want
I asked him to swich places for a week, he will be the one doing all the cooking to see how it goes, he refused straight away saying he doesn't want to do it he hates cooking, so i told him i don't like it either, why should i be the one in charge, why not him? i'm not his maid but his equal partner, he should be the one helping with the cooking not the other way around because with the pregnacy i'm really tired all the time, so that's would be nice if he could help
He got upset (as planned) saying all i do is shouting at him, he is always the one to be blamed for everything, and he shut down, took his laptop and went on it, that was the end of the talk for him.. I kept on for a little while but he just blanked me...
And was not talking to me anymore.
So i just went off for a couple of hours, when i got home i could hear him saying to our son FINALLY from upstairs
He came down and still didn't talk to me
So i start cooking (frankfurt sausages wrap in ham, with a homemade tomato sauce made with a bechamel sauce and tomato puree and some cheese)
After i put it in the oven and told him what i prepared i asked him if would like to eat what i was eating, he answered me in a rough tone NO
I then said, that's fine, then make your own arrangement for your dinner, i'm having this.
Maybe 10 min later, he came in the kitchen asking what was in the recipe, after explanation, he said, there nothing else to eat so i don't have the choice i'll have to eat it!
And ate it, and liked it, he wouldn't admit it but he did, he got 2 servings
And we all ate at the table
It's a 1st in a long time yeahh
He was a bit jealous of my son having nuggets for his supper, but it was going to be too much for him to try this, i'll need to start little by little with him, he knows tomorrow he going to have try carrot and chicken with his pasta
So at the end, my husband is still upset at me for "forcing him" to eat and blaming him for everything, he is still really cold with, but we're getting there!
You,a pregnant woman went for a walk to clear your head and when you got back he said “finally”to your son and let you do the cooking and graced you with his presence at the dinner table?he didn’t think to take it on himself and cook?what in the actual fcuk??0 -
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