The Alpha Male - does he really exist?

arybvtcw0eolkf · 10-01-2018 12:07am

21Savage wrote: »

Dear GOD!
Did you slay those club *insert expletive for sexually promiscuous female* back in the day? I'm guessing you struggled with high class women though, aye?

What?.

21Savage · 10-01-2018 12:08am

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

What?.

There is a certain type of girl who goes full on primal when confronted with a guy with your stats.

NollagShona · 10-01-2018 12:08am

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

I'd tick a lot of the boxes for being alfa.. Military career, bouncer for over 20 years, Judo black belt, 6'1'' and built, biker (rarely ride less than a 1000cc).

But I can be soft as hell, for example the end of the movie 'The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas'. I was absolutely bawling and couldn't look up at the screen.

Although I'm very straight and have never had a single gay thought I'd consider myself 'gay friendly' and have always said that if I was single and met a guy who made me happy I'd like to think I'd go with that.

I do believe in Alfa males, I think I'm alfa.. Dunno, OP you recently said a photo I posted of myself was how you imagined I'd look, do I come across as alfa?.

Oh, I'm not a natural leader but I find a lot of people look to me for leadership.

[I'm 52 in March if that matters]

Call me!

21Savage · 10-01-2018 12:09am

NollagShona wrote: »

Call me!

Case in point.

Feels Good Man · 10-01-2018 12:11am

Deleted User wrote: »

Ughh please.... I think 'prize pr1ck' is a more appropriate term for that sort of mindset.

No. The IDGAF attitude is the most liberating attitude a man can have. Girl rejects you? Her loss. Made a mistake at work? So what. You think your boss got to where he is by ruminating on his mistakes?

See yourself as the man, never apologise and never back down.

NollagShona · 10-01-2018 12:12am

21Savage wrote: »

Case in point.

Not really...

NollagShona · 10-01-2018 12:14am

Feels Good Man wrote: »

No. The IDGAF attitude is the most liberating attitude a man can have. Girl rejects you? Her loss. Made a mistake at work? So what. You think your boss got to where he is by ruminating on his mistakes?

See yourself as the man, never apologise and never back down.

That’s more Scar than Mufasa tbf

Feels Good Man · 10-01-2018 12:15am

NollagShona wrote: »

That’s more Scar than Mufasa tbf

Care to elaborate?

Feels Good Man · 10-01-2018 12:20am

[QUOTE
Although I'm very straight and have never had a single gay thought I'd consider myself 'gay friendly' and have always said that if I was single and met a guy who made me happy I'd like to think I'd go with that.

[I'm 52 in March if that matters][/QUOTE]

I don't think you're as straight as you seem to think.

Feels Good Man · 10-01-2018 12:22am

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

Although I'm very straight and have never had a single gay thought I'd consider myself 'gay friendly' and have always said that if I was single and met a guy who made me happy I'd like to think I'd go with that.

[I'm 52 in March if that matters]

I don't you're as straight as you seem to think.

21Savage · 10-01-2018 12:22am

Feels Good Man wrote: »

[QUOTE
Although I'm very straight and have never had a single gay thought I'd consider myself 'gay friendly' and have always said that if I was single and met a guy who made me happy I'd like to think I'd go with that.

[I'm 52 in March if that matters]

I don't think you're as straight as you seem to think.[/QUOTE]

****ing lol'd hard. If some guy makes me laugh and smile I'd be happy to bang him hahahahhaha

10-01-2018 12:22am

Feels Good Man wrote: »

No. The IDGAF attitude is the most liberating attitude a man can have. Girl rejects you? Her loss. Made a mistake at work? So what. You think your boss got to where he is by ruminating on his mistakes?

See yourself as the man, never apologise and never back down.

I think a real man takes responsibility for their actions. However, its harder to do this is world that loves scapegoats and witchhunting.

I do agree with your sentiments about not taking rejection hard with women fair enough. No ones rejection is worth worrying about if it is an impolite one

As for the boss not ruminating on their mistakes, most of them would throw someone else under a bus while the rest would spin it to their favour

I personally think this alpha tag was created by Hollywood style writers. Its
a portrayal of obnoxious jocks with alot of physical strength but not much in terms of brains. Unfortunately though its become some sort of aspiration for the increasingly 'Americanised' society that we live in here in Ireland

arybvtcw0eolkf · 10-01-2018 12:27am

Feels Good Man wrote: »

I don't you're as straight as you seem to think.

Well I'm not going to justify myself to you (whoever you are), but I've never even been curious about gay sex, but I vote YES on the gay marriage referendum because I believe in people being happy with whomever makes them feel happy.

I don't know what you're confused about tbh, I'm straight. If I was gay or even bi or curious I'd have the courage to say so.

21Savage · 10-01-2018 12:29am

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

Well I'm not going to justify myself to you (whoever you are), but I've never even been curious about gay sex, but I vote YES on the gay marriage referendum because I believe in people being happy with whomever makes them feel happy.

I don't know what you're confused about tbh, I'm straight. If I was gay or even bi or curious I'd have the courage to say so.

You implied you'd bang some lad if he made you happy.

Feels Good Man · 10-01-2018 12:30am

Deleted User wrote: »

I personally think this alpha tag was created by Hollywood style writers. Its
a portrayal of obnoxious jocks with alot of physical strength but not much in terms of brains. Unfortunately though its become some sort of aspiration for the increasingly 'Americanised' society that we live in here in Ireland

With respect I think that is a limiting belief. Imo there is a HUGE difference between being an a asshole and being an alpha. An Alpha doesn't need to bully anyone or brag about his sexual conquests. Why would he need the validation? He's not insecure.

The dickheads you're talking about are high caste betas. These are the guys who think they can jump to alphahood by being brash and obnoxious. This is your archetypal middle manager who thinks he can become top dog by harassing his staff. What he doesn't realise is his complete lack of charisma means he'll never reach the top.

The soundest men I know are alphas. These are the ones who praise you and motivate you to be your best.

arybvtcw0eolkf · 10-01-2018 12:31am

21Savage wrote: »

Dear GOD!
Did you slay those club *insert expletive for sexually promiscuous female* back in the day? I'm guessing you struggled with high class women though, aye?

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

What?.

21Savage wrote: »

There is a certain type of girl who goes full on primal when confronted with a guy with your stats.

Ok I think I get what you're trying to say. But you shouldn't objectify a lady like that, and I'm not sure how you can put a lady into a certain 'class', are you 80 years old and from a different era or something?.

Feels Good Man · 10-01-2018 12:31am

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

Well I'm not going to justify myself to you (whoever you are), but I've never even been curious about gay sex, but I vote YES on the gay marriage referendum because I believe in people being happy with whomever makes them feel happy.

I don't know what you're confused about tbh, I'm straight. If I was gay or even bi or curious I'd have the courage to say so.

Your post implies you'd have a relationship with another man if he made you happy which contradicts your 'never had a gay thought' statement.

ChunkyLover54 · 10-01-2018 12:32am

Thomas Scrawny Turf wrote: »

I can no longer distinguish the pisstakes from the earnest posts. I'm impressed by the sheer magnitude of nonsense. It has transcended ridicule.

This ^^

arybvtcw0eolkf · 10-01-2018 12:34am

21Savage wrote: »

You implied you'd bang some lad if he made you happy.

I actually didn't. But maybe you're hoping I'd 'bang' you?.

You don't have to answer that because I won't be entertaining you any further but I will allow you the last word if that's what you'd like.

Bed time, peace out.

21Savage · 10-01-2018 12:34am

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

Ok I think I get what you're trying to say. But you shouldn't objectify a lady like that, and I'm not sure how you can put a lady into a certain 'class', are you 80 years old and from a different era or something?.

Ratchet club sl..... vs high class educated well ready women. Very big difference. For example Aoibheann Ní Shuilebean(sp?) the girl Ryan Tubrudy was with(Lord knows how! Maybe because she liked his brain) vs some ratchet big titted 20 something year old who lives for the weekend and posting insta selfies of her ass.

There is a discernible difference in the quality of both women. Both are attractive to males but on a different level. High class intelligent men would opt for Aoibheann and she would be into them while the club girl just wants some 6 foor 4 tattooed bearded lad.

Rumpy Pumpy · 10-01-2018 12:35am

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

I'd tick a lot of the boxes for being alfa.. Military career, bouncer for over 20 years, Judo black belt, 6'1'' and built, biker (rarely ride less than a 1000cc).

But I can be soft as hell, for example the end of the movie 'The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas'. I was absolutely bawling and couldn't look up at the screen.

Although I'm very straight and have never had a single gay thought I'd consider myself 'gay friendly' and have always said that if I was single and met a guy who made me happy I'd like to think I'd go with that.

I do believe in Alfa males, I think I'm alfa.. Dunno, OP you recently said a photo I posted of myself was how you imagined I'd look, do I come across as alfa?.

Oh, I'm not a natural leader but I find a lot of people look to me for leadership.

[I'm 52 in March if that matters]

No offence amigo, but if you’re standing outside a door in a Schott jacket then you ain’t no alpha. A meathead, maybe. If you owned the nightclub then you might be alpha.

Pintman Paddy Losty · 10-01-2018 12:46am

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

I actually didn't. But maybe you're hoping I'd 'bang' you?.

You don't have to answer that because I won't be entertaining you any further but I will allow you the last word if that's what you'd like.

Bed time, peace out.

Massive whiff of repressed homosexuality from this and your previous post.

Bragging about judo, bouncing and being a biker. Just head off to the boiler room and let off all those years of pent up confusion.

10-01-2018 12:58am

Feels Good Man wrote: »

With respect I think that is a limiting belief. Imo there is a HUGE difference between being an a asshole and being an alpha. An Alpha doesn't need to bully anyone or brag about his sexual conquests. Why would he need the validation? He's not insecure.

The dickheads you're talking about are high caste betas. These are the guys who think they can jump to alphahood by being brash and obnoxious. This is your archetypal middle manager who thinks he can become top dog by harassing his staff. What he doesn't realise is his complete lack of charisma means he'll never reach the top.

The soundest men I know are alphas. These are the ones who praise you and motivate you to be your best.

Yeah i think the better term for that would be decency. Alpha is some conjured up American term by some click bait con artist who watches too many movies.

There is one fair philosophy to live life by. Treat others as you would wish to be treated. I dont believe in any set 'winning' formula or mindset. Theres just you, your common sense, the rest of the world, and luck

Billy86 · 10-01-2018 4:34am

21Savage wrote: »

Fatima Damaged Beehive wrote: »

Ok I think I get what you're trying to say. But you shouldn't objectify a lady like that, and I'm not sure how you can put a lady into a certain 'class', are you 80 years old and from a different era or something?.

Ratchet club sl..... vs high class educated well ready women. Very big difference. For example Aoibheann Ní Shuilebean(sp?) the girl Ryan Tubrudy was with(Lord knows how! Maybe because she liked his brain) vs some ratchet big titted 20 something year old who lives for the weekend and posting insta selfies of her ass.

There is a discernible difference in the quality of both women. Both are attractive to males but on a different level. High class intelligent men would opt for Aoibheann and she would be into them while the club girl just wants some 6 foor 4 tattooed bearded lad.

Well, if you've not actually been a wind up for the last few days, you should print this post of yours and read it back a few times. Maybe do it up in such a way that it looks like something you read online, ask women you know what they think of it (of course hiding that they're your own words), get some indirect feedback.

Sad truth is, you appear to have no idea how women think or what they are, mainly because you seem to view them more or less as one of a tiny handful of hive minds. Yo, nor I or anyone here (I would think!), have any idea what that woman is like either in the bedroom nor just generally in her everyday life out of the public eye.

Years back I was in Australia and knew some girls that were back paging, mainly German, who worked as strippers I nthe kings Cross area. Regularly they'd get chatted up by the johnny bravo muscle heads that frequented (and with Aussies being tall on average, many were well over 6ft), and rarely did they even entertain it... not because of how they looked but because they were so big on their bro culture which kings Cross is the absolute worst for, and because they never really provided any mental stimulation. Though some of them did meet big ripped Aussie lads outside the workplace (once or twice in it too, but rarely) who were really lovely, interesting characters.

In fact all of them were students on a gap year, studying anything from standard arts or marketing stuff, all the way up to biochemistry and engineering. That in and of itself completely disproves your frankly bizarre theories, as I'm still friends with many of them on Facebook and they're mainly highly paid, professional women in extremely qualified and technical fields, earning what would look to be pretty serious money going by their gas, cars, etc.

Its the same if there's a hot girl in a coffee shop or whatnot you want to ask out. I feel much more comfortable talking to women with the view to getting their numbers outside nightclub settings anyway, since I've a slight hearing problem that makes loud music entirely drown out the conversation around me.

About 2yrs ago I managed to get a Brazilian girls number in this situation even though we worked in Toronto's financial district where many people were on multiples of what I made and hit the gym non stop. She got asked for her number 3+ times daily by lunch time... I was the only one who succeeded and we had a short term fling. She told me I got her number because I didn't ask until about my 15th time in there, and because before that point she found me funny and interesting to talk to.

By the way I'm about 5'10 (maybe 5'9), thin but not in great shape, was not dressed half as sharp as these lads in the suits worth upwards of a thousand dollars, usually was dressed for warmth more than looking good because of the Canadian winter, have a thing called dyspraxia that basically causes me to forget what I'm talking about mid sentence repeatedly, and have that beautiful wet-pastry complexion so many of us Irish do. In short, she felt comfortable around me, in giving me her number, and in going out for coffee since I made a proper effort to get to know her rather than gawking at her very Brazilian arse and looking to get a date immediately. It wasn't because I'm built like The Rock with Ryan Goslings face superglued on top and a million euro bank account.

If you're unsatisfied with where you are, you need to stop point blank ignoring advise given by others, you need to stop looking for excuses about it being everyone else's fault but yours, and you need to find out what women think of your attitude and approach towards them so you can make an active effort to improve on them.

Someone mentioned the DGAF attitude above and I'd agree (but always be warm and pleasant!). I used to stress so much about women and got nowhere from it, now if i like someone I'll typically get to know them better and build a rapport, then ask for their number when they feel comfortable. If they say no, I don't stress and just let them know they're great fun, look fantastic, it's no big deal (because if you've got to know them they usually are extremely apologetic/awkward about saying no), and wish them well. Sometimes that's even got them to change their mind, crazily! But more importantly, it keeps me in a good mindframe and feeling positive about the whole thing which roll nicely into dealing with the next woman I might be interested in. Easier sad than done maybe but don't focus on the final destination n and instead just look to have fun with them on the way, even if it doesn't go anywhere. Women are people, and people like having fun.

As another example, my current girlfriend once turned down a professional major league baseball player for the Baltimore orioles. I got to smooching her on the night I met her, largely because half the place was trying to chat her up constantly and I was just talking random ****e with her for my own entertainment which kept her laughing. It didn't even fully dawn on me at first how attractive she is, which surely helped here.

It's really very, very similar to sales. You're too busy focusing on the product you think they'll see (height, build, clothes, income) to notice that people like to buy off people they like and trust when they feel comfortable, and that while everyone loves to buy, almost nobody likes to be sold to.

You also need to learn to be more secure in yourself, and where you have insecurities, to make fun of them. If you think she picked up on an insecurity, use that for some self depricating. When something like my dyspraxia (which also makes it impossible to dance at all, no matter how drunk I am I lose all confidence on a dance floor) becomes noticeable I don't so much laugh it off as use it to make fin of myself. Most women (people generally actually) like that trait in others since it shows they don't take themselves too seriously and eviscerated concerns about this guy chatting them up being arrogant, narcissistic etc.

Often times people respond in kind too, leaving you later on the night teasing a "HB10" if we're going all in on the red pill pua lingo sh*te, about the chubby ankles she had as a teenager while shes mocking you back about being so fecking malcoordinated that you've gone and stepper on her toes numerous times while awkwardly bumping into people. Meanwhile, the lads done up to the nines and taking themselves hyper seriously while they're "on the hunt" and trying all their learned "tricks" and crap have stopped giggling to themselves about my chances, and are wondering wtf is going on. And it's not only about making her comfortable by the way, that kind of carry on also makes ME feel so so much more comfortable in HER company.

Tldr: you've a lot to learn but you've got to be willing to learn it, you need to take yourself less seriously by the sounds of things, and you need to stop blaming women for these stereotyped caricatures you have of them.

arybvtcw0eolkf · 10-01-2018 10:13am

Billy86 wrote: »

Tldr: you've a lot to learn but you've got to be willing to learn it, you need to take yourself less seriously by the sounds of things, and you need to stop blaming women for these stereotyped caricatures you have of them.

You gave him way more of your time than I was going to.

He's obviously on a wind up, and a teen with years of learning ahead of him or maybe dropped on his head when he was a baby.

Billy86 · 10-01-2018 10:38am

Well on top of all my other personal f*** ups I've learned to not get in the way of things is the fact I've had mild insomnia since I was in primary school, hence my occasional biblical length 3am boards posts!

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5 · 10-01-2018 12:27pm

I'd imagine he is at least slightly on a wind up but that's the thing, it's not too much of an exaggeration of views people actually hold. Even if broadbro mc ratchetface there ignores it I think it's no harm that the views are seen to be challenged. I don't think the post from the young guy worried about his height a few pages back was a wind up like.

It's funny, the other night I was out with four men and I was watching the group dynamics because of this thread. Was anyone the "natural leader" that the others deferred to and so on. Nope, just four normal men enjoying each other's company and mine. Able to talk about women as if they're people and not fúckable cars that you need a set of cheatcodes for (which probably explains why the 3 straight ones were coupled up). Able to interact with people without having to put body language and tone of voice on manual. One of them was about 5'7" and another 6'3" and they swapped funny stories about people trying to fight them, and slagged each a bit.

I'm sure there'll be "just a bunch of betas" posts in response to this but Jesus they're happier people than the people insisting on the existence of alphas and explaining in great and contradictory detail what alpha means and what women are like.

Wibbs · 10-01-2018 1:11pm

Stella Stocky Watt wrote: »

just four normal men enjoying each other's company and mine. Able to talk about women as if they're people and not fúckable cars that you need a set of cheatcodes for (which probably explains why the 3 straight ones were coupled up). Able to interact with people without having to put body language and tone of voice on manual.

Yep, but that's the issue that is sometimes missed EB. This pickup red pill stuff is mostly aimed and marketed at men who don't have those skills. Men who for whatever reason missed out on the usual adolescent learning process of normal human interactions. So they hit the adult world not really knowing the language. Some of these men would be on the autistic spectrum, but many wouldn't it would just be a developmental stage they missed.

The latter I would say is easier to miss out on these days. The "loner" kid at school can be "gregarious" in the online/gaming/social media environment, but that doesn't translate. Especially with Women™ who can be seen as nearly another species. And they can't understand why they can't get "lucky" the way Paddy Hardshaw down the road can. After all they're nice guys(and probably are).

Added to that is this kind of chap is more likely to be the binary analytical type, so can understand if that is applied to women. A set of rules to follow and if you get them right. An If, Then, Else command for attraction. That's where all the Alpha/beta/gamma/delta/sarging/sets/negs/DHV/Hook etc jargon stuff hails from. It's near programming code. Ditto with all the "game" models, with a set of adaptable steps.

In essence EB this stuff isn't aimed at those guys you know. It's aimed at guys you may not have in your life at all. The invisible men. And if you do/did know them you'd probably give them the well meaning and heartfelt advice of "just be yourself". Which they know is a nonsense, because they are being themselves and it's not working.

Cue the snake oil peddlers on the interwebs, who promise them they can get that babe in the club/street and here's how.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5 · 10-01-2018 1:34pm

I've got seven thousand posts here Wibbs, trust me I've met and known the kind of guys you're talking about

I had to laugh earlier when yer man argued that my friends have girlfriends because they're probably GAA players, I've always knocked around with the freaks n geeks.

Apart from that, agree with everything you said there. The whole thing is so exploitative.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 10-01-2018 2:26pm

I do think they exist and I think sometimes the ones you meet (in real life) can be some of the nicest and uncomplicated men. I'm too suspicious of self proclaimed nice guys. I've known too many "nice guys" who have been anything but underneath, insecure and needy and nasty if they're not getting their own way.

I like guys who know their own mind, knows what they want from life, strong and confident, bit of a prick on the outside but quite soft and kind on the inside. I don't want to have to hold any mans hand going through life, reassuring him constantly and feeding into a neediness.

The Alpha Male - does he really exist?

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