Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Viral Facebook video speaking out about domestic violence (Read mod note in the OP)

Options
1…6791112…23

Comments

  • Options
    #242
    Dogowner55
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 149 ✭✭Dogowner55


    eviltwin wrote: »
    A protection order isn't worth the paper its printed on. If anything it can just be a red rag to a bull.

    And sicing a hate mob on you to ruin you and your business without proof where you have no way to defend yourself isn't?

    If anything if he was a violent person that a protection order legally obtained would cause them to lose their mind, what she did would be way more rage inducing .


  • Options
    #243
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Deleted User wrote: »
    And that is, of course, absolutely appropriate.

    A protection order can be obtained very quickly and ex parte, whereas an assault cases can take months to build up and will almost certainly be contested (on the basis that there are usually no witness etc.)


    When you call the guards after having someone grab you by your hair, push you to the ground and continue to bang your face repeatedly off a ceramic tiled floor until the only thing your aware of is the taste of blood in your mouth, and they tell you to wait until the following Wednesday to get a protection order, what good is a protection order then??
    If that was done to a random person on the street they'd be arrested and locked up, but when you're living with someone, it's fine because 5 days later (or however many days you are away from a court sitting) you can apply for a protection order.


  • Options
    #244
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    eviltwin wrote: »
    A protection order isn't worth the paper its printed on. If anything it can just be a red rag to a bull.

    Could you be more exact and specify what do you mean it's not worth the paper it's written on?

    It is nothing more than it sets out to be, a specific order directing the respondent to refrain from certain acts, and usually the first step in the protection order/safety order/barring order route to addressing domestic violence.

    What would you replace it with?


  • Options
    #245
    verywell
    Registered Users Posts: 427 ✭✭verywell


    frostyjacks wrote: »
    The Gardai? A victim support group? Friends? Family? A woman's shelter? Posting a video on the internet about it just seems strange to me.

    You most definitely have not been in an abusive relationship.


  • Options
    #246
    Jjiipp79
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 374 ✭✭Jjiipp79


    Beating on women is one of the single worst things you can do, saying that any abuse to man/woman/child are acts of a coward.


    I want to say this, without naming or seeing a perp how do we know this is true?
    Could be looking for her 15mins of fame!

    Believe nothing you hear and only half of what you see.


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #247
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    When you call the guards after having someone grab you by your hair, push you to the ground and continue to bang your face repeatedly off a ceramic tiled floor until the only thing your aware of is the taste of blood in your mouth, and they tell you to wait until the following Wednesday to get a protection order, what good is a protection order then??
    If that was done to a random person on the street they'd be arrested and locked up, but when you're living with someone, it's fine because 5 days later (or however many days you are away from a court sitting) you can apply for a protection order.

    There seems to be confusion about the nature of Court Orders.

    No Court purports to be the policeman in the bedroom. I mean, what use is an injunction or a conviction for assault if the party named in the order comes back with a shotgun and shoots you? Well none obviously.

    If it was done to someone on the street the accused would be detained for questioning then released, highly unlikely they would be locked up, but if so they'd just go to the High Court and get bail.

    Let's not make up the law.


  • Options
    #248
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Could you be more exact and specify what do you mean it's not worth the paper it's written on?

    It is nothing more than it sets out to be, a specific order directing the respondent to refrain from certain acts, and usually the first step in the protection order/safety order/barring order route to addressing domestic violence.

    What would you replace it with?


    You do know they're given chances with those orders too? I'm not sure which one but it can be broken twice before a person is arrested for breaking it, as far as I remember


  • Options
    #249
    suicide_circus
    Registered Users Posts: 19,802 ✭✭✭✭suicide_circus


    What's this guys name?


  • Options
    #250
    Dogowner55
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 149 ✭✭Dogowner55


    Jjiipp79 wrote: »
    Beating on women is one of the single worst things you can do

    I am sure you mean beating a person, beating a man or a woman has the same effect on the person.


  • Options
    #251
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    You do know they're given chances with those orders too? I'm not sure which one but it can be broken twice before a person is arrested for breaking it, as far as I remember

    The second time I'll request that you stop making up law as you go along.

    That's nonsense, as was your post above about people being locked up without question in assault cases.


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #252
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Deleted User wrote: »
    There seems to be confusion about the nature of Court Orders.

    No Court purports to be the policeman in the bedroom. I mean, what use is an injunction or a conviction for assault if the party named in the order comes back with a shotgun and shoots you? Well none obviously.


    And you think someone who beats the **** out of a woman on a regular basis gives a rats arse about a court order?? You think a piece of paper from a court would stop someone enclined to come back with a shot gun? Hardly. At least if they're done for assault they'd be locked up for a year or two.


  • Options
    #253
    Jjiipp79
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 374 ✭✭Jjiipp79


    Dogowner55 wrote: »
    I am sure you mean beating a person, beating a man or a woman has the same effect on the person.

    Maybe you should read the rest of my post!!!
    Instead of talking crap about what ppl already know


  • Options
    #254
    Dogowner55
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 149 ✭✭Dogowner55


    suicide_circus wrote: »
    What's this guys name?

    Lets keep his name off boards, if you want to join the hate mob you can find it easily online


  • Options
    #255
    eviltwin
    Registered Users Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Could you be more exact and specify what do you mean it's not worth the paper it's written on?

    It is nothing more than it sets out to be, a specific order directing the respondent to refrain from certain acts, and usually the first step in the protection order/safety order/barring order route to addressing domestic violence.

    What would you replace it with?

    It can be very effective if your partner is receptive to it, a wake up call perhaps but in the most part its a victim taking control of their life and there is nothing an abuser hates more than a victim taking back control. If your partner has been violent in the past it might make them rethink their position as with a PO the gardai now have power of arrest but usually it just moves the abuse, it doesn't stop it. So the abuser who might have been physical will now become emotionally and mentally abusive or may do things than can't be proven as violent.

    I don't know what you would replace it with, I'm not sure there is anything that it can be replaced with. I'd like to see more refuges for those who need to get away. We don't have enough refuge spaces for female victims and we have none for male victims which needs to change as a matter of urgency. There needs to be better training for gardai on domestic violence especially where its a male victim/female abuser and there needs to be better protection for those who are not covered by existing laws ie people who are dating, not living together etc


  • Options
    #256
    Dogowner55
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 149 ✭✭Dogowner55


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    And you think someone who beats the **** out of a woman on a regular basis gives a rats arse about a court order?? You think a piece of paper from a court would stop someone enclined to come back with a shot gun? Hardly. At least if they're done for assault they'd be locked up for a year or two.

    And you think an internet video to shame and ruin him with a hate mob without proof will make a person go ok now I can't go back.


  • Options
    #257
    zeffabelli
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,516 ✭✭✭zeffabelli


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    When you call the guards after having someone grab you by your hair, push you to the ground and continue to bang your face repeatedly off a ceramic tiled floor until the only thing your aware of is the taste of blood in your mouth, and they tell you to wait until the following Wednesday to get a protection order, what good is a protection order then??
    If that was done to a random person on the street they'd be arrested and locked up, but when you're living with someone, it's fine because 5 days later (or however many days you are away from a court sitting) you can apply for a protection order.
    This is not true. If the cops came to a scene like you describe there would be an immediate arrest.


  • Options
    #258
    suicide_circus
    Registered Users Posts: 19,802 ✭✭✭✭suicide_circus


    Dogowner55 wrote: »
    Lets keep his name off boards, if you want to join the hate mob you can find it easily online

    Yeah I'm just so into the auld hate mobbing right now


  • Options
    #259
    jimdublin15
    Registered Users Posts: 244 ✭✭jimdublin15


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    Because the system does jack ****. The guards will come out, and tell you to apply to court for a protection order. That's all they ever do.
    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    And you think someone who beats the **** out of a woman on a regular basis gives a rats arse about a court order?? You think a piece of paper from a court would stop someone enclined to come back with a shot gun? Hardly. At least if they're done for assault they'd be locked up for a year or two.

    Yes, the current system is failing, we need to address the system. Change is needed, funding, care and overall a better system that takes domestic abuse seriously. (Trust me, the system we have is lacking and/or broken I know this firsthand)

    However No, the answer cannot be trial by public opinions instead of facts and correct investigation by the authorities. It’s an action that does not only not benefit us but could very well make it worse for all of us and the people in the case directly involved.

    This type of action could in my view is a form of street justice,and can lead to a hate mod and "people looking for justice" taking matters into our own hands that simply cannot be condoned. The consequences of what is happening now with the media, in essence a witch_hunt started with the Facebook video could and very well may lead us down a very dangerous and slippery slope.


  • Options
    #260
    One eyed Jack
    Registered Users Posts: 23,695 ✭✭✭✭One eyed Jack


    Dogowner55 wrote: »
    Why do you believe her story with no proof and pretty much authorities saying it's not correct.


    What do you mean "no proof"? Is her account alone not evidence? Her physical appearance is more evidence. If you have some evidence which contradicts her account of events, I'm all ears.

    What do you mean by "pretty much authorities saying it's not correct"?

    Why are you so quick to ruin the mans life over what could be a vindictive partner with no proof.


    I didn't ruin his life at all? I said I had no sympathy for him now that his life is ruined by his own actions. I don't see your proof that this woman could be a vindictive partner either?
    Do you want everything to be sorted by mod rule with no proof need?


    Who's sorted anything here? This woman was ignored for long enough while her partner gave all the appearances of an upstanding member of the community. That image has now been shattered, and no harm either, and the more victims of domestic violence who are encouraged to expose their abusers, maybe the authorities and the people who want to believe she is just a vindictive woman, might start taking the issue of domestic violence seriously.


  • Options
    #261
    Streetwalker
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,906 ✭✭✭Streetwalker


    suicide_circus wrote: »
    What's this guys name?

    Don't think you can say it on here but it's all over facebook and twitter. The guy is a grade A arsehole according to a lot of people who know him. Hope it destroys his life only the very cowardly and pathetic beat on a woman.


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #262
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Deleted User wrote: »
    The second time I'll request that you stop making up law as you go along.

    That's nonsense, as was your post above about people being locked up without question in assault cases.


    When a GBH case goes in front of a judge, the defendant isn't going to walk away with a slap on the wrist. And I would advise you to actually check the facts, in that with one of those orders there's no arrest when it's broken the first time


  • Options
    #263
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    zeffabelli wrote: »
    This is not true. If the cops came to a scene like you describe there would be an immediate arrest.


    No, there wasn't an immediate arrest.


  • Options
    #264
    eviltwin
    Registered Users Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    zeffabelli wrote: »
    This is not true. If the cops came to a scene like you describe there would be an immediate arrest.

    Do me a favour. Go volunteer at a refuge or a domestic violence helpline for a few hours and talk to victims about what response they have had from gardai. Go talk to a Amen about the way their callers are treated when they contact gardai. You might be surprised at how little they do sometimes.


  • Options
    #265
    brooke 2
    Registered Users Posts: 5,472 ✭✭✭brooke 2


    NachoBusiness wrote: »
    At the 8m37sec mark pf the interview wither Adrian asks her did she ever hit him and her answer began with very oddly as if she was being cagey with her answer tbf:

    Adrian: "Did you ever hit him?"

    Emma: "At times, yeah, pushing and eh yeah we would be, pushing each other and eh heavy, heavy with each other, yeah... but I never slapped him across the face, never punched him the face, nothing like that".

    She also mentioned that she was tiny compared to him.


  • Options
    #266
    frostyjacks
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,951 ✭✭✭frostyjacks


    Posting this sort of stuff on Facebook trivialises what should be a serious issue. If she was genuinely aggrieved by her ex, she should have gone down the proper channels. When people start taking the law into their own hands, society will start to come apart at the seams.


  • Options
    #267
    strelok
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,162 ✭✭✭strelok


    brooke 2 wrote: »
    She also mentioned that she was tiny compared to him.

    i'm a lot smaller than him too, i'd still expect a slap if I was attacking him and would get no sympathy at all if I was punched and it came out later that 'yeah Id push him around and hit him, but i never went for that face. that's just not on'


  • Options
    #268
    LollipopJimmy
    Registered Users Posts: 5,440 ✭✭✭LollipopJimmy


    brooke 2 wrote: »
    She also mentioned that she was tiny compared to him.

    That absolutely does not make it ok for a woman to hit a man.
    My gf at the time was a lot smaller than me and she did serious damage to me.
    It's not ok for a man to hit a woman. But it's also not ok and just as bad for a woman to hit a man


  • Options
    #269
    jimdublin15
    Registered Users Posts: 244 ✭✭jimdublin15


    brooke 2 wrote: »
    She also mentioned that she was tiny compared to him.

    Oh right, I see so as she was tiny it was okay for her to be violent ?

    With thinking like this, it's no wonder men don't report abuse.


  • Options
    #270
    mickstupp
    Registered Users Posts: 1,764 ✭✭✭mickstupp


    Dogowner55 wrote: »
    Lets keep his name off boards, if you want to join the hate mob you can find it easily online
    Yes, you're right, I agree. The only hate mob allowed around here is against the woman who dared speak out, and we know her name already because she gave it to us, so let's try and discredit her to bits.

    That about sum up your position?
    Dogowner55 wrote: »
    And you think an internet video to shame and ruin him with a hate mob without proof will make a person go ok now I can't go back.
    You keep spouting this bull**** and haven't yet provided any evidence that this was her intention. It's like you're saying it over and over and over again, in the hope that if you say it often enough people will believe you. You're claiming you know her intentions and you do not, unless she herself told you. Did she tell you? I only ask because in the video she stated very explicitly that her intentions were entirely not what you say they were.

    Now, if, as a result of her video, a hate mob as you call it started up and went after this guy, that doesn't actually mean she posted a video for that reason. The outcome of an event doesn't have to be the same as the intention behind it. I mean... you do realise that, don't you??? I assume you must...


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #271
    brooke 2
    Registered Users Posts: 5,472 ✭✭✭brooke 2


    Dogowner55 wrote: »
    Minor means it's not as she says and therfore sicing a hate mod on him so he cannot defend himself is an very disgraceful thing she did.

    Assualt isn't minor so her story doesn't addup

    If the authorities described that assault as 'minor', I would not blame her for reacting as she did!! I would be apopleptic if it happened to me!!


This discussion has been closed.
Advertisement