Viral Facebook video speaking out about domestic violence (Read mod note in the OP)

john why

Did anyone see the video on FB with over 550k views in a few hours? Poor girl telling how her fella whose a fitness instructor gave her a black eye in front of her kid. Fair play to her speaking out and hopefully helping others suffering from domestic violence.


Mod note:

Absolutely no identifying the man involved and no links to her facebook page. You can link to media sources that has the video in it.

Mod: Right, let's drop the whole "don't be dating scumbags/women date scumbags blah blah blah". Most people don't choose to date an abuser. And no, this isn't up for discussion.

MadYaker

In before the lock?

fleet_admiral

john why wrote: »

Did anyone see the video on FB with over 550k views in a few hours? Poor girl telling how her fella whose a fitness instructor gave her a black eye in front of her kid. Guy has a gym in santry and about four times the size of her. Fair play to her speaking out and hopefully helping others suffering from domestic violence.

True, not enough male victims of domestic violence speak out

Alexis Sanchez

Are you going to post the video?

JaMarcusHustle

john why wrote: »

Guy has a gym and about four times the size of her.

Sounds like a tiny gym tbh.

taytobreath

just saw it meself, she has a nice shiner to one of her eyes.

john why

Alexis Sanchez wrote: »

Are you going to post the video?

I'm not sure how to upload this from FB and put it up here. Any suggestions ?

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

john why wrote: »

I'm not sure how to upload this from FB and put it up here. Any suggestions ?

Give us your facebook password and I'll do it.

Alexis Sanchez

john why wrote: »

I'm not sure how to upload this from FB and put it up here. Any suggestions ?

Just copy the URL from Facebook and post it here by clicking on the Earth-shaped icon (when you hover the mouse over the icon, it says "insert link").

*Edit. Nevermind.

michael999999

Can someone post the video, so us normal people without bukeface can see it?

Slippin Jimmy

Fair ****s to her. Absolute scummer better off without him.

Dravokivich

I don't watch viral videos. Wouldn't want to catch anything off'em.

Peregrine

Opening this again. Read the warning in the OP. No links to her facebook page and no indentifying the man. You can link to other sources.

john why

Nim wrote: »

Opening this again. Read the warning in the OP. No links to her facebook page and no indentifying the man. You can link to other sources.

Thanks for opening this, it's a very important subject

eviltwin

Has the partner had a right of reply?

NachoBusiness

Yeah, fair play to her, trial by Facebook is a great idea.

Look, she knew well that everyone on her facebook account would know who she was talking about as everyone who knows her would know her boyfriend and so looks to me as if this is just revenge for the affairs. I question her motives. We don't know what happened in this altercation. We don't know if she also was violent. All she says she did wrong was throw his phone. She says: "No man has any right to put his hands on a women / to raise his hands to a woman".

No.. Nobody has the right to put their hands on anyone, regardless of gender.

If she really wants to help women that suffer abuse through domestic violence: go to the Gardai first, not Facebook.

kittycati

Is this it?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3151853/Mother-two-left-black-eye-punched-ex-lover-posts-emotional-video-domestic-violence-torture.html

c_man

eviltwin wrote: »

Has the partner had a right of reply?

I think Internet Law allows him to outline his defence on Twitter.

farmchoice

its on the daily mail online if anyone wants to see it.

steddyeddy

Right if this is real I hope she and more importantly the kid are provided shelter pronto.

pmasterson95

Yeah Facebook Justice

Specialun

Facebook court..please gather the mob...all cv's accepted

Lollipops23

I'm on her side until I'm given reason not be tbh. I did immediately think 'nobody has the right to hit anyone else' as opposed to 'no man'.


For now I think she's staying with family, so at least she has a roof over her head and some support. It took guts to tell the word what had been going on.

Lenn Brennan

The man in question has deleted all of his social media, including his business page

Drumpot

I watched it and felt for the woman and her children.

I am, at the best of times, cynical of peoples online antics and self promoting use of Facebook and twitter. In this case I don't believe it matters why the woman chose to air the abuse she received.

This woman was beaten by her partner and her children had to witness it. She felt sharing this with others in this manner would either help her or protect others. I don't see where there is room to make any sort of mockery of any part of this story/thread . . I especially don't see how anybody can say what she "should of done" unless they themselves have first hand experience of being beaten and overcoming it . .

Mr Freeze

Saw this last night, my wife was watching it on FB.

I hope she reported him to the cops too and not just posted the video. Great that she is raising awareness and all, but she should definitely report him. Sounds like it was the 3rd time he had hit her too.

rolexeagle1

Lenn Brennan wrote: »

The man in question has deleted all of his social media, including his business page

Not all of it he hasn't, there is still some youtube accounts and a business website and Google+

NachoBusiness

Holy crap, just seen on Twitter who the guy is. Ah sure ffs, now I stand over what I said ten fold.

The chap needs locking up if guilty, no question, but this is just revenge as she knows damn well going public will ruin him. Does he deserve that? To have this video on his family member's FB feed? Perhaps, but only if and when he is found guilty, not beforehand. That's what we have authorities for.

Had this been a nobody, would she be straight on to Facebook with a video?

Not a chance.

Lenn Brennan

srumball wrote: »

Not all of it he hasn't, there is still some youtube accounts and a business website and Google+

His FB and instagram is gone and these are where he was most active

mickstupp

NachoBusiness wrote: »

Not a chance.

Not a chance... Do you mean not a chance that she could possibly have any interest in using her own misfortune to highlight a very serious issue?

eviltwin

NachoBusiness wrote: »

Holy crap, just seen on Twitter who the guy is. Ah sure ffs, now I stand over what I said ten fold.

The chap needs locking up if guilty, no question, but this is just revenge as she knows damn well going public will ruin him. Does he deserve that? To have this video on his family member's FB feed? Perhaps, but only if and when he is found guilty, not beforehand. That's what we have authorities for.

Had this been a nobody, would she be straight on to Facebook with a video?

Not a chance.

I reckon to 99% of the population he is a nobody.

magma69

Video is gone viral. Video will hurt him far more than anything the guards will do.

NachoBusiness

mickstupp wrote: »

Not a chance... Do you mean not a chance that she could possibly have any interest in using her own misfortune to highlight a very serious issue?

No, if she (or anyone) wanted to do help other victims of domestic violence, they would make the video, take photos, keep them and post them on YouTube or write an article / blog about it six months down the line when it was all done with and say: 'Here's what I went through, but I did x, y and z and I got help and now I am back on my feet, you can too, don't let this happen to you, there is help available' etc.

Posting a video straight away on FB, with no mention of the authorities, helps nobody.

The Moldy Gowl

What can't we link the video directly here, but link to other sites that have it?

So, why aren't we allowed link it from Facebook?

poeticmakaveli

Terrible to see any man hit any woman and vice versa, even mental torture is as bad and worse!
But the only thing that annoys me is this "raise awareness" Everybody is raising awareness these days, we know what's right and wrong and nobody needs to see this video to learn that its wrong and you need to go to the guards and friends about this man, I think some people love the glory of it all by getting more attention than help!

Boom_Bap

Gowlasauras Rex wrote: »

What can't we link the video directly here, but link to other sites that have it?

So, why aren't we allowed link it from Facebook?

When linking to FB, you would be linking the profile of a user. We dont do that on boards.

You can link to an article that has the link embedded.

michael999999

NachoBusiness wrote: »

No, if she (or anyone) wanted to do help other victims of domestic violence, they would make the video, take photos, keep them and post them on YouTube or write an article / blog about it six months down the line when it was all done with and say: 'Here's what I went through, but I did x, y and z and I got help and now I am back on my feet, you can too, don't let this happen to you, there is help available' etc.

Posting a video straight away on FB, with no mention of the authorities, helps nobody.

How do you know him?

NachoBusiness

eviltwin wrote: »

I reckon to 99% of the population he is a nobody.

Indeed, but the video was no doubt made with the 1% in mind and to ruin the chances of that single digit ever becoming a double one.

Which is all cool if all is as she suggests and as I say, if it is, hopefully imprisonment will be his punishment, not being unfriended.

CaoimheSquee

poeticmakaveli wrote: »

Terrible to see any man hit any woman and vice versa, even mental torture is as bad and worse!
But the only thing that annoys me is this "raise awareness" Everybody is raising awareness these days, we know what's right and wrong and nobody needs to see this video to learn that its wrong and you need to go to the guards and friends about this man, I think some people love the glory of it all by getting more attention than help!

I did think that too, for a moment, everyone seems to be raising awareness about something these days. I also thought it would be better to say that no one should hit anyone, rather than being gender specific, and I would put money on it that she would agree too. One has to remember the sheer levels of emotion that would have been present within her while recording this.

However, from glancing through the comments the amount of women (literally hundreds) explaining that that they have been through the same and thanking her for posting the video took away any cynicism I may have somewhat felt. It was amazing and instantly warranted her posting of the video imho.

The fact is she has got two black eyes and her head split open while this guy has had two affairs, got another woman pregnant and mentally abused her is really worth baring in mind. If helping others gives her some extra strength to get through this too then I think she should go for it and I wish her and her kids the very best.

Fakman87

I know the guy in question. Not the nicest guy in the world but I can't help but think there was probably a better course of action for her to take, especially for her children's sake.

CaoimheSquee

NachoBusiness wrote: »

No, if she (or anyone) wanted to do help other victims of domestic violence, they would make the video, take photos, keep them and post them on YouTube or write an article / blog about it six months down the line when it was all done with and say: 'Here's what I went through, but I did x, y and z and I got help and now I am back on my feet, you can too, don't let this happen to you, there is help available' etc.

Posting a video straight away on FB, with no mention of the authorities, helps nobody.

Yes it does. It helps others come forward and talk and not feel alone.

mickstupp

NachoBusiness wrote: »

No, if she (or anyone) wanted to do help other victims of domestic violence, they would make the video, take photos, keep them and post them on YouTube or write an article / blog about it six months down the line when it was all done with and say: 'Here's what I went through, but I did x, y and z and I got help and now I am back on my feet, you can too, don't let this happen to you, there is help available' etc.

Posting a video straight away on FB, with no mention of the authorities, helps nobody.

Helps nobody... except for all the people that it helps, who might not have had the bravery to stand up and get out of bad situations otherwise.

You have no idea the effect it will have but you're dismissing the possibility out of hand. You've also dismissed any positive motive she may have had, i.e. raising awareness (yes poeticmakaveli, that phrase is clearly an indicator of insincerity), by saying she wouldn't have done it if the man in question wasn't well known, whoever the hell he is. You say 'if she wanted to help other victims of domestic violence', clearly implying you don't think she does want to help other victims of domestic violence, because she's not following what you deem to be the logical, rational, process.

NachoBusiness wrote: »

Indeed, but the video was no doubt made with the 1% in mind and to ruin the chances of that single digit ever becoming a double one.

You seem so sure. When did she tell you this was her motive?

eviltwin

NachoBusiness wrote: »

Indeed, but the video was no doubt made with the 1% in mind and to ruin the chances of that single digit ever becoming a double one.

Which is all cool if all is as she suggests and as I say, if it is, hopefully imprisonment will be his punishment, not being unfriended.

The thing is there is not much that gardai can do. He will at most get a night in the cells if that.

anncoates

Sorry, but I sort of agree with the people feeling disquiet about using social media as a kangaroo court before seeking actual justice through the law.

I've zero sympathy for any prick that beats somebody obviously and it's human to be glad that they will be outed and punished in the harshest way and that the victim can feel some empowerment.

I can also see why a woman would rightly fear that the law may not adequately serve her in this regard.

For all that, even when social media is used as a summary court to destroy somebody;s life 'in the right', it's still irrevocably ushering in a time where it's commonplace to use the same media to destroy lives purely for lolz or spite without consequence.

fullstop

eviltwin wrote: »

I reckon to 99% of the population he is a nobody.

Yeah, never heard of him. Was expecting him to be one of those reality tv z-list celebrities.

padd b1975

c_man wrote: »

I think Internet Law allows him to outline his defence on Twitter.

All Tweets must start with 'Some people..........':cool:

darkdubh

So is this guy "famous"?All I know about him is he was on some RTE reality show.Is he some sort of sporting figure?(not asking anyone to name him)

janja

She was on the Adrian Kennedy show on 98fm this morning if anyone wants to listen back.

Mightydrumming

5,555,102 views already between private page and business page. What a job she done, I can only imagine the amount of courage it took for her to post the video. I'm sure he will get his comupins! Big hard man will get a knock or two in the coming months. Atleast she's safe and away from him and she has a good business behind her.

NachoBusiness

eviltwin wrote: »

The thing is there is not much that gardai can do. He will at most get a night in the cells if that.

Oh I appreciate that to a degree, and it shouldn't be, and like I say, if that is the case, cool, no bother. I wouldn't say for a second that he doesn't deserve to lose his reputation and means of earning a living as a result of this, of course he should, if all is as she suggests and I hope then that it does go on to negatively effect his earning potential.

However, I just don't believe that she posted the video for the reasons she is claiming.

mickstupp wrote: »

Helps nobody... except for all the people that it helps, who might not have had the bravery to stand up and get out of bad situations otherwise.

I have already conceded that victims of domestic violence (both men and women) have role to play in that regard and so making the point doesn't retort anything that I have said.

You have no idea the effect it will have but you're dismissing the possibility out of hand. You've also dismissed any positive motive she may have had, i.e. raising awareness (yes poeticmakaveli, that phrase is clearly an indicator of insincerity), by saying she wouldn't have done it if the man in question wasn't well known, whoever the hell he is. You say 'if she wanted to help other victims of domestic violence', clearly implying you don't think she does want to help other victims of domestic violence, because she's not following what you deem to be the logical, rational, process.

You seem so sure. When did she tell you this was her motive?

She didn't, obviously. She posted a video publicly. I watched it. Now I'm commenting on it.

In that video she made many claims about this man: that he had affairs, that he got another woman pregnant, that he won't be around for his kids anymore and that their children (7 months and 18 months) will know that their daddy hit their mammy. Why will they know this? Why do we need to know about the affairs? The video (posted on her FB page where I am sure all their friends and family would see) just seems like a laundry list of his sins and all done under the guise of alerting women to domestic abuse. I simply don't buy it.

As I said earlier: there is a time and a place to release videos and pictures of your injuries to the public and that is when your effort at seeking justice through the correct avenues have been exhausted and you have some real advice to give women and what it is that they need to do should they unfortunately find themselves in similar circumstances.

bucketybuck

Posting videos to the lynch mob on Facebook and doing radio interviews are not the correct way to handle being the victim of a crime. It wouldn't be the first time baying mobs went after somebody despite not having all the details and the damage done can be not insignificant.

Vigilante justice is no justice at all, especially when fueled by the "U OK BABE" brigade.