Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names] - Part II

emeldc

Tinkin off [name] and his family rip [name] taughts are with use all 💙💙💙

fathead82

Seen a post from the national lottery page saying what the jackpot is for tonight. Loads of people were commenting under it saying "liked & shared".
& Here's me like a tool paying to do it in Tesco when all I had to do was like & share it on Facebook to win.

MonkstownHoop

Underneath a photo of what I assume is a mosque in Ireland

'We're ****ed !!!! Blancastain !!! Going be much worse as the new one is the biggest in Europe'

'Der worse for stoping i tell him **** of or knock him.dwn'

'Disgusting carry out. But they are a law onto themselves'

'There is no option to shear'

chite

While it's coherent, is this advice actually recommended by medical professionals?

"Please pause for 2 minutes and read this:

1. Let’s say it’s 7.25pm and you’re going home (alone of course) after an unusually hard day on the job.
2. You’re really tired, upset and frustrated.
3 Suddenly you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to drag out into your arm and up in to your jaw. You are only about five km from the hospital nearest your home.
4. Unfortunately you don’t know if you’ll be able to make it that far.
5. You have been trained in CPR, but the guy who taught the course did not tell you how to perform it on yourself.
6. HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE? Since many people are alone when they suffer a heart attack without help, the person whose heart is beating improperly and who begins to feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness.
7. However, these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously. A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep inside the chest. A breath and a cough must be repeated about every two seconds without let-up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again.
8. Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the blood circulating. The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain normal rhythm. In this way, heart attack victims can get to a hospital.
9. Tell as many other people as possible about this. It could save their lives!!
10. A cardiologist says If everyone who gets this mail kindly sends it to 10 people, you can bet that we’ll save at least one life.
11. Rather than sending jokes, please... contribute by forwarding this mail which can save a person’s life.
12. If this message comes around you... more than once… please don’t get irritated... You should instead, be happy that you have many friends who care about you & keeps reminding you how to deal with a Heart attack.

Hold your finger down on the message and hit forward."

Hotblack Desiato

chite wrote: »

While it's coherent, is this advice actually recommended by medical professionals?

The short answer - no.

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/cough-cpr/

Yes. This crap started spreading in 1999.

AndrewJRenko

I've just come across these comments from what appears to be an Eastern European lady around the time of the abortion referendum. I put them in spoiler tags because to be honest, they are fairly grossly offensive

you are insane its impossible always a lie that it was rape i believe if they rape a guy that is against his will or a woman rape an other girl i believe that can be against the will they are in blood coz they will lie and thats why they kill the girl but if a muslim f....s a girl there is ababy gonna be and nothing wrong in making pregnant someone or trying it would never happen dry the girl has to be wet(a seven year old gets wet already same as a 6-7 yeras old guys gets hard as well especially watching porn or something) and if she was wet its not a rape and against her will but between an guy adult and a little boy its usually a rape and that is against muslim relegion i believe the same sex

pleas advice

chite wrote: »

While it's coherent, is this advice actually recommended by medical professionals?

"A cardiologist says If everyone who gets this mail kindly sends it to 10 people..."

well, there's your answer

sligojoek

AndrewJRenko wrote: »

I've just come across these comments from what appears to be an Eastern European lady around the time of the abortion referendum. I put them in spoiler tags because to be honest, they are fairly grossly offensive

you are insane its impossible always a lie that it was rape i believe if they rape a guy that is against his will or a woman rape an other girl i believe that can be against the will they are in blood coz they will lie and thats why they kill the girl but if a muslim f....s a girl there is ababy gonna be and nothing wrong in making pregnant someone or trying it would never happen dry the girl has to be wet(a seven year old gets wet already same as a 6-7 yeras old guys gets hard as well especially watching porn or something) and if she was wet its not a rape and against her will but between an guy adult and a little boy its usually a rape and that is against muslim relegion i believe the same sex

It's like one of those instruction manuals you see that have been put through Google translate.

JCX BXC

fathead82 wrote: »

Seen a post from the national lottery page saying what the jackpot is for tonight. Loads of people were commenting under it saying "liked & shared".
& Here's me like a tool paying to do it in Tesco when all I had to do was like & share it on Facebook to win.

Looked it up and sure enough you're right.

I'm speechless that people are really that retarded.

Plopsu

sligojoek wrote: »

It's like one of those instruction manuals you see that have been put through Google translate.

Much better if you DON'T understand what she's trying to say.

tea and coffee

I am truly saddened that anyone could believe that.

DublinHun72

The Crowman wrote: »

Ye want to catch d real pushers put instead of vandalising innocent people ye tramps

Vandalising innocent people?

PlaneSpeeking

DublinHun72 wrote: »

Vandalising innocent people?

Tagging pensioners is now a thing ???

Plopsu

PlaneSpeeking wrote: »

Tagging pensioners is now a thing ???

Paint splattered grannies everywhere.

DublinHun72

fathead82 wrote: »

Seen a post from the national lottery page saying what the jackpot is for tonight. Loads of people were commenting under it saying "liked & shared".
& Here's me like a tool paying to do it in Tesco when all I had to do was like & share it on Facebook to win.

People do that all the time !
I run a couple of Instagram pages for business and often under the photo of the product people say "liked and shared" when it's clearly NOT a competition.

demanufactured

"Day r all snakes out dere...no good men any more....ass long ass I have me 3 kids and me house I'm happy been single"....



Followed by....



U ok hun?



Followed by...



Yeh...all men are pricks...all I want is a gud father for me kids....

Guy:Incognito

I'd love to slag her for using been instead if being but I feel I'd upset a lot of users here that do the same.

So I won't

demanufactured

Guy:Incognito wrote: »

I'd love to slag her for using been instead if being but I feel I'd upset a lot of users here that do the same.

So I won't

Drives me up the wall.

El Weirdo

demanufactured wrote: »

Drives me up the wall.

Ditto.

marcbrophy

Guy:Incognito wrote: »

I'd love to slag her for using been instead if being but I feel I'd upset a lot of users here that do the same.

So I won't

You're a nice Human bean Guy

It wasnt me123

Guy:Incognito wrote: »

I'd love to slag her for using been instead if being but I feel I'd upset a lot of users here that do the same.

So I won't

Am I so immune to the bad spelling, grammar and just sentence composition that I didn't even notice been instead of being!

pc7

on the 18th ders a protest outside lenster house every 1 needs to be hear!! SHARE

PlaneSpeeking

pc7 wrote: »

on the 18th ders a protest outside lenster house every 1 needs to be hear!! SHARE

I so hope it's a plea to Richard Bruton for more education.

BattleCorp

pc7 wrote: »

on the 18th ders a protest outside lenster house every 1 needs to be hear!! SHARE

I object to the fact that whoever wrote the above statement is more than likely classified as the same species as myself.

PlaneSpeeking

BattleCorp wrote: »

I object to the fact that whoever wrote the above statement is more than likely classified as the same species as myself.

Distantly perhaps - several evolutionary steps behind you I would say!

BattleCorp

PlaneSpeeking wrote: »

Distantly perhaps - several evolutionary steps behind you I would say!

I'd be checking whoever wrote that to see if they have opposable thumbs.

PlaneSpeeking

BattleCorp wrote: »

I'd be checking whoever wrote that to see if they have opposable thumbs.

Unlikely but the missing link is still to be found so ....!

Plopsu

Guy:Incognito wrote: »

I'd love to slag her for using been instead if being but I feel I'd upset a lot of users here that do the same.

So I won't

There entitled to use they're own grammar if they want.

Mena Mitty

'3 peace sweet for sale very gud Consion'

Big Nasty

Plopsu wrote: »

There entitled to use they're own grammar if they want.

I'd say they're aware of all their entitlements already. :pac: