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Sexy street harassment
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How do you know what any of these guys' intentions are or how things might escalate? I've had such innocuous comments escalate into being followed down the street, crossing over and he crosses over while yelling crude insults at me, having to jump onto a bus to get away...I've also been cornered in a cul-de-sac by a lad who 'just wanted to talk to me'.
Not murder, not rape, but not fcuking pleasant and not something I'm willing to accept is perfectly reasonable behaviour from one stranger to another.
I said that most serial killers/rapists probably won't draw attention to themselves by initiating contact ......... although Ted Bundy would probably disagree with me!
My point being while wolf-whistles, leering and flirty comments may be unpleasant or embarrassing etc. for some women they don't generally lead to any actual physical harm ......... ie these incidences are quite harmless yet some women react in a way over-the-top dramatic fashion as to suggest that they are/were in actual danger of being murdered and raped ......... in that order!
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I said that most serial killers/rapists probably won't draw attention to themselves by initiating contact ......... although Ted Bundy would probably disagree with me!
My point being while wolf-whistles, leering and flirty comments may be unpleasant or embarrassing etc. for some women they don't generally lead to any actual physical harm ......... ie these incidences are quite harmless yet some women react in a way over-the-top dramatic fashion as to suggest that they are/were in actual danger of being murdered and raped ......... in that order!
You're right, a majority of them probably don't lead to any physical danger for the woman. Does that then mean that it's ok for us to be shouted at, leered at, accosted, intimidated, commented upon?0 -
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My point being while wolf-whistles, leering and flirty comments may be unpleasant or embarrassing etc. for some women they don't generally lead to any actual physical harm ......... ie these incidences are quite harmless yet some women react in a way over-the-top dramatic fashion as to suggest that they are/were in actual danger of being murdered and raped ......... in that order!
But we shouldn't be made to feel unpleasant or embarrassed. My dog walking route takes me on a path that's just below the motorway and sometimes cars or trucks beep at me. It's like they're trying to tell me that even by leaving the house I'm drawing unnecessary attention to myself. They get absolutely nothing out of it except making me feel like the jeans and jacket I'm wearing or the way I'm holding the dogs lead are particularly enticing and something I should change- obviously that last bit is a total over exaggeration in my case but is in fact the way someone else might feel. What is the point in doing it??0 -
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I said that most serial killers/rapists probably won't draw attention to themselves by initiating contact ......... although Ted Bundy would probably disagree with me!
My point being while wolf-whistles, leering and flirty comments may be unpleasant or embarrassing etc. for some women they don't generally lead to any actual physical harm ......... ie these incidences are quite harmless yet some women react in a way over-the-top dramatic fashion as to suggest that they are/were in actual danger of being murdered and raped ......... in that order!
They don't generally lead to any actual physical harm?
Well that's hardly reassuring, is it?I agree ........... but my original post was in response to a lady who implied that this kind of behaviour usually leads to rape/murder ........ when in fact it usually doesn't.
I myself am a father, son, brother, husband, uncle etc. so I personally would never engage in this type of behaviour and (if in the company of one my female loved ones) respond to such disrespectful behaviour equally as disrespectfully towards any "man" who offends a lady in my company.
Again, hardly reassuring, and you can't say that for a fact unless you can read people's minds, and since nobody can read other people's minds, they don't know exactly the motivations behind another person's behaviour, and so they can only judge based on their experiences, and if their experiences with strangers cat-calling them, following them, etc have been negative, then it's understandable why they might form certain conclusions.
That's not being over-dramatic, that's just being wary of their personal safety based on their experiences. I've been mugged and assaulted on the street in the past while I was waiting for the bus one morning. The last question I asked the cab driver dropping me off was "Is it safe around here?", "You'll be grand" he said. Turned out he was wrong and I should have trusted my own judgement.
Just because something is unlikely to happen, doesn't mean anyone should ever be complacent about their personal safety. After the incident I was holed up in my apartment for a week, afraid to go out in public. I still get unnerved when strangers approach me on the street. It's instinct, I have to think to try to overcome that instinct, it's not something I can easily laugh off as "but sure I know generally speaking a stranger isn't going to attack me". Those sort of statements offer no reassurance at all to a person who has been in that situation, and that IS a fact.0 -
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