Sexy street harassment

Gone Drinking

I saw this video this morning:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3mWt3cjN0Y

In case you can't watch it, its a montage of a woman walking around New York silently, receiving lots of random attempted chat up lines and some sexist remarks, based purely on how well she looks (In fairness, HOT DAYUM).

The video says at the end there was 100+ instances of verbal harassment during the 10 hour experiment.. I dunno, one of the ones on video was "Hey Beautiful, have a good day", would that fall under harassment? I'd be delighted if a woman said that to me when I was walking down the road :P

In fairness, there's one creepy guy who just follows her around for five minutes, this and a few of the comments are completely not on.

So what's peoples thoughts on this? Have any men or women here ever experienced similar?

suicide_circus

Much more likely to happen in the US than here

Potatoeman

Gone Drinking wrote: »

I saw this video this morning:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3mWt3cjN0Y

In case you can't watch it, its a montage of a woman walking around New York silently, receiving lots of random attempted chat up lines and some sexist remarks, based purely on how well she looks (In fairness, HOT DAYUM).

The video says at the end there was 100+ instances of verbal harassment during the 10 hour experiment.. I dunno, one of the ones on video was "Hey Beautiful, have a good day", would that fall under harassment? I'd be delighted if a woman said that to me when I was walking down the road :P

In fairness, there's one creepy guy who just follows her around for five minutes, this and a few of the comments are completely not on.

So what's peoples thoughts on this? Has any men or women here ever experienced similar?

Give it ten years and she will be unhappy she is not getting random attention. :v

nxbyveromdwjpg

I dunno, the only ones that weren't harmless, imo (and I'm not her so take with pinch of salt..) were the two weirdos that walked alongside her for an odd amount of time.

Hi how are you.. is that really harassment?

Barely There

The kind of guys that shout out random stuff to good looking women in the street give the rest of us, who prefer a discreet perv, a bad name.

super_furry

Does that happen to women in Ireland?

Uncle Ruckus

You would swear these guys never saw a woman before in their lives.

nxbyveromdwjpg

super_furry wrote: »

Does that happen to women in Ireland?

Definitely not as much as that.

There are probably a fair percent of the people in that video would have passed some comment or other no matter who walked past too.

kylith

Gone Drinking wrote: »

The video says at the end there was 100+ instances of verbal harassment during the 10 hour experiment.. I dunno, one of the ones on video was "Hey Beautiful, have a good day", would that fall under harassment? I'd be delighted if a woman said that to me when I was walking down the road :P

In fairness, there's one creepy guy who just follows her around for five minutes, this and a few of the comments are completely not on.

So what's peoples thoughts on this? Has any men or women here ever experienced similar?

A lot of women would have experienced something like this and, after a while, even the innocuous ones are unwelcome because what it boils down to is that you can't step outside your house without people judging you on what you look like and what you wear, and feeling free to comment on that. It influences how you act and what you wear (I have clothes that I can't wear because I'm afraid of attracting comments). It's basically reducing a woman to a thing that you can say what you like about because, hey, she shouldn't have breasts if she doesn't want people to comment an them.

Last_Minute

Yeah, having a giant American Eagle on your backside doesn't draw attention to it, also 10 hours of walking and 2 minutes of footage - and this was the worse stuff.

I'm not implying this is right, it's not. But these kinda 'videos' that pop up online have to be taken with a pinch of salt. You never know whats staged and whats not. That guy following her was creepy though.

O yeah, and don't forget to donate to the Hollaback! foundation who are dedicated to ending street harrasement - how exactly are they planning on doing that now?

It reminds me of that video that was recently on the web of some guys getting refused food from random people eating in the street before getting some pizza from a homeless guy - a pizza that they gave hime for free. Yeah, theres no difference at all.

Cantremember

Let's make it illegal. Looking at people, talking to people, trying to start a conversation, trying to chat someone up? Penalties upon conviction?

Shenshen

super_furry wrote: »

Does that happen to women in Ireland?

It does.

I think what makes it so annoying and at times outright creepy is not the one guy saying "Hi sweetie, have a nice day". It's the fact that there are so many of them doing it.

And, truth be told, as a woman you tend not to think "Great, he noticed how lovely my hair looks today", you tend to think "He's talking at me, what's he going to do next? Is he watching? Will he start following me? Should I step into that shop to throw him off my trail?"

It's not nice, it's scary.
Yes, some of them probably really don't have any ulterior motives and are just trying to be nice, but how do you know which one of them is the one who will turn out to be the nutcase you need to be aware of?

Grayson

kylith wrote: »

A lot of women would have experienced something like this and, after a while, even the innocuous ones are unwelcome because what it boils down to is that you can't step outside your house without people judging you on what you look like and what you wear, and feeling free to comment on that. It influences how you act and what you wear (I have clothes that I can't wear because I'm afraid of attracting comments). It's basically reducing a woman to a thing that you can say what you like about because, hey, she shouldn't have breasts if she doesn't want people to comment an them.

Why do you own them? Not being argumentative, I'm just wondering why? Stupid impulse buys like the bright green velvet jacket I own? (yes, i was sober)

I like it when I'm walking along the street and exchange smiles. It's the mildest of flirting. I do think open comments can be a bit much.

Cupcake_Crisis

Remember the video of the builders shouting lovely, life affirming stuff at women walking down the street? That was lovely.

LeBash

kylith wrote: »

A lot of women would have experienced something like this and, after a while, even the innocuous ones are unwelcome because what it boils down to is that you can't step outside your house without people judging you on what you look like and what you wear, and feeling free to comment on that. It influences how you act and what you wear (I have clothes that I can't wear because I'm afraid of attracting comments). It's basically reducing a woman to a thing that you can say what you like about because, hey, she shouldn't have breasts if she doesn't want people to comment an them.

So Irish women wear tight fitting clothes and a lot of skin on show because in December its comfortable and not to attract attention?

Egginacup

Oh FFS!!!

So "Hey beautiful, have a great day!" is fucking harassment now??

Friggin' American prudes.

Osmosis Jones

Shenshen wrote: »

It does.

I think what makes it so annoying and at times outright creepy is not the one guy saying "Hi sweetie, have a nice day". It's the fact that there are so many of them doing it.

And, truth be told, as a woman you tend not to think "Great, he noticed how lovely my hair looks today", you tend to think "He's talking at me, what's he going to do next? Is he watching? Will he start following me? Should I step into that shop to throw him off my trail?"

It's not nice, it's scary.
Yes, some of them probably really don't have any ulterior motives and are just trying to be nice, but how do you know which one of them is the one who will turn out to be the nutcase you need to be aware of?

Of course a woman should be allowed to walk down the street without feeling harassed, but surely a man should be allowed to make a nice remark without being judged as some sort of pervert or worse.

kylith

Grayson wrote: »

Why do you own them? Not being argumentative, I'm just wondering why? Stupid impulse buys like the bright green velvet jacket I own? (yes, i was sober)

Impulse buys, or something that I thought looked ok but isn't (sometimes it's not until you have it on properly at home that you find that it's lower cut than you thought), or even things that you think are fine, but you keep getting comments when you wear it out.

Rightwing

kylith wrote: »

A lot of women would have experienced something like this and, after a while, even the innocuous ones are unwelcome because what it boils down to is that you can't step outside your house without people judging you on what you look like and what you wear, and feeling free to comment on that. It influences how you act and what you wear (I have clothes that I can't wear because I'm afraid of attracting comments). It's basically reducing a woman to a thing that you can say what you like about because, hey, she shouldn't have breasts if she doesn't want people to comment an them.

Nonsense.

Dr. Lollington

I'd safely assume most good looking woman, if not all woman, have experienced it to some extent in Ireland. I know I have.

I've had cars beeping their horns at me and men shouting out the window. It's usually just harmless stuff 'heya gorgeous' but it's still humiliating. I know men always think they'd love it if women were shouting heya handsome at them in the street but it doesn't work that way for woman. Sometimes it's playful and I brush it off, but other times it can be quite intimidating or just plain disgusting!

I was living in Brixton in London recently and I couldn't leave the house without being harassed. That was properly scary at times. I'd go across the street to buy some milk and have men hissing at me and saying things like 'heyyy white girl, shake it for me'. I used to find it funny telling my boyfriend some of things I heard afterwards but at the time it was pretty frightening!!

I was in New York when I was 17 and I got loads of hassle there too. I remember one man in particular saying to me 'hey baby, your skin is so white, your body is so pure'. Shudder!!!

biko

Done two years ago in Belgium too
http://www.theguardian.com/world/2012/aug/03/belgium-film-street-harassment-sofie-peeters

Tabnabs

Osmosis Jones wrote: »

Of course a woman should be allowed to walk down the street without feeling harassed, but surely a man should be allowed to make a nice remark without being judged as some sort of pervert or worse.

maybe you could think it, and give the other person the right not to have your opinions on them shared without their assent?

Penny Tration

Are some women really freaked out by men passing comments, to the point where they won't wear certain clothes?!

I'm female, and tbh, I couldn't give a monkeys.

I wear whatever i feel like wearing. If it attracts comment, whatever. If it doesn't, whatever.

I'd never be careful how I dress so as to avoid comment from men. I don't see the big deal. If they call you beautiful, say thanks. If they're creepy, tell them to fcuk off.

kylith

LeBash wrote: »

So Irish women wear tight fitting clothes and a lot of skin on show because in December its comfortable and not to attract attention?

I can't comment on why people may choose to wear what they wear. However I'm sure that you'll agree that there is a vast difference between a woman wearing skimpy clothing when out for the night, and a woman such as the one in the video who wasn't wearing anything that remarkable.

Rightwing wrote: »

Nonsense.

How so?

Rightwing

Dr. Lollington wrote: »

I'd safely assume most good looking woman, if not all woman, have experienced it to some extent in Ireland. I know I have.

I've had cars beeping their horns at me and men shouting out the window. It's usually just harmless stuff 'heya gorgeous' but it's still humiliating. I know men always think they'd love it if women were shouting heya handsome at them in the street but it doesn't work that way for woman. Sometimes it's playful and I brush it off, but other times it can be quite intimidating or just plain disgusting!

I was living in Brixton in London recently and I couldn't leave the house without being harassed. That was properly scary at times. I'd go across the street to buy some milk and have men hissing at me and saying things like 'heyyy white girl, shake it for me'. I used to find it funny telling my boyfriend some of things I heard afterwards but at the time it was pretty frightening!!

I was in New York when I was 17 and I got loads of hassle there too. I remember one man in particular saying to me 'hey baby, your skin is so white, your body is so pure'. Shudder!!!

Were they black racists having a pop at whites? Getting their own back eh ?

Dyr

Does she want to bring back slavery?

Duggy747

Those 2 guys following her were slimy bastards, alright.

Penny Tration

LeBash wrote: »

So Irish women wear tight fitting clothes and a lot of skin on show because in December its comfortable and not to attract attention?

I wear tight clothes because they're comfortable to me, as that's what I'm used to wearing. Also because I look like a heifer in baggy clothes.

Showing off skin isn't a comfort thing, but I don't see how tight clothing isn't a comfort choice.

Osmosis Jones

Tabnabs wrote: »

maybe you could think it, and give the other person the right not to have your opinions on them shared without their assent?

I wouldn't think it as imparting my opinion so much as giving a harmless (or what I would consider harmless) compliment.

Obviously some comments can be too extreme.

nxbyveromdwjpg

biko wrote: »

Done two years ago in Belgium too
http://www.theguardian.com/world/2012/aug/03/belgium-film-street-harassment-sofie-peeters

That one escalated quickly

Dr. Lollington

No, I don't think it had anything to with race in Brixton really. The majority of people there are black to be fair but there's a fair clatter of white people there now too.

it's just men hanging around on Brixton hill drinking cans of cheap p*ss. They probably mean no harm and are just bored or they find it funny. It never really bothered me but one time a gang of about four men started walking in front of me and circling me. That was scary and taking it too far.

i think that's what it comes down to. No women is gonna mind a man saying' Hey sexy. have a good day'. You might even be flattered. It's just knowing where to draw the line between the messers and the genuine weirdos who could actually harm you. There's an underlying fear that's been instilled in woman to be on your guard in case you're dragged down a lane-way and raped! Sad but true.

biko

I was in old Jerusalem and for the first time in my life men were giving me compliments as I was passing by and wanting to stop and chat.
"Hey goodlooking", "Come over here" etc etc

I'm a guy, 19yo at the time.
It ****ing freaked me out.

I've nothing but compassion for the women who has to hear this **** daily.

Rightwing

biko wrote: »

I was in old Jerusalem and for the first time in my life men were giving me compliments as I was passing by and wanting to stop and chat.
"Hey goodlooking", "Come over here" etc etc

I'm a guy, 19yo at the time.
It ****ing freaked me out.

I've nothing but compassion for the women who has to hear this **** daily.

But if you were a homosexual, you may have been chuffed ?

Ave Sodalis

green_screen wrote: »

I wear tight clothes because they're comfortable to me, as that's what I'm used to wearing. Also because I look like a heifer in baggy clothes.

Showing off skin isn't a comfort thing, but I don't see how tight clothing isn't a comfort choice.

Yup, only jeans that I can afford to buy are the long legged skinny jeans out of Pennies because ordinary jeans dont fit me and I could spend a fortune on one pair of jeans in another shop that do fit (long legs and size 6/8).
As for the comments, I don't know of it's just good looking women. I've had people beep at me and even shout stuff and I wouldn't be the best looking girl in the world. The most annoying one though was "cheer up, you'd look a lot better if you smiled" from some random lad in a shop once. Was not impressed....

kylith

biko wrote: »

I was in old Jerusalem and for the first time in my life men were giving me compliments as I was passing by and wanting to stop and chat.
"Hey goodlooking", "Come over here" etc etc

I'm a guy, 19yo at the time.
It ****ing freaked me out.

I've nothing but compassion for the women who has to hear this **** daily.

Think how it'd feel if it started at about age 16 and went on into your 30s, and you'd had being wary of men drilled into you for years*.

* Yes, of course all men are not rapists, but it can be the case that girls are taught to be wary of all strange men because you never know.

anncoates

Egginacup wrote: »

Oh FFS!!!

So "Hey beautiful, have a great day!" is fucking harassment now??

Friggin' American prudes.

I think it's the sheer monotonous regularity of it that would irritate, going by that video.

Not really sure how you would - as suggested - legislate against it though. It would surely be next to impossible to do.

Grayson

Dr. Lollington wrote: »

I'd safely assume most good looking woman, if not all woman, have experienced it to some extent in Ireland. I know I have.

I've had cars beeping their horns at me and men shouting out the window. It's usually just harmless stuff 'heya gorgeous' but it's still humiliating. I know men always think they'd love it if women were shouting heya handsome at them in the street but it doesn't work that way for woman. Sometimes it's playful and I brush it off, but other times it can be quite intimidating or just plain disgusting!

Only because it doesn't happen much therefore when it does it's flattering. If it happened all the time the novelty would wear thin an the compliment wouldn't mean as much.

danslevent

I actually started a thread about this in the Ladies Lounge recently:

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=90944861

marcbrophy

Great, so girls are taught that men will rape them the minute they have been given any bit of attention from them.

FFS!

Stay classy society :pac:

biko

Rightwing wrote: »

But if you were a homosexual, you may have been chuffed ?

I don't know, I'm not a homosexual.
But I'll go out on a limb here and say no.

eviltwin

LeBash wrote: »

So Irish women wear tight fitting clothes and a lot of skin on show because in December its comfortable and not to attract attention?

Funny how I saw a lot of guys walking around topless during the summer and still didn't feel the need to shout comments at them. Let people wear what they want. Its not an invitation to shout at them.

AndonHandon

If you get a look and a smile, it's okay to say "hey", but think "you will be naked in my bed by sunset".

the_monkey

OK the two guys walking alongside her was harassment sure - but "hey beautiful" ???
which were the vast majority of the comments -
thats harrasment ???... more aggressive feminism BULLSHÍT...

suicide_circus

eviltwin wrote: »

Funny how I saw a lot of guys walking around topless during the summer and still didn't feel the need to shout comments at them. Let people wear what they want. Its not an invitation to shout at them.

Men are more visually triggered when it comes to arousal, nothing new there, it's why straight single women often wear revealing clothing on a night out, fake hair, pushup bras, heels to make the bum more prominent, makeup, tan etc - visual impact.

*waits to be told that women dress that way for themselves and it has nothing, conscious or subconscious, to do with men*

anncoates

the_monkey wrote: »

OK the two guys walking alongside her was harassment sure - but "hey beautiful" ???
which were the vast majority of the comments -
thats harrasment ???... more aggressive feminism BULLSHÍT...

Some of the weird passive tone comments are actually the creepier ones.

Pat Mustard

kylith wrote: »

you can't step outside your house without people judging you on what you look like and what you wear, and feeling free to comment on that. It influences how you act and what you wear (I have clothes that I can't wear because I'm afraid of attracting comments).

I know exactly what you mean. I can't go anywhere in my fitted 'IRA undefeated army' t-shirt without lingering stares and catcalls.

I just feel that people are undressing me with their eyes.

eviltwin

suicide_circus wrote: »

Men are more visually triggered when it comes to arousal, nothing new there, it's why straight single women often wear revealing clothing on a night out, fake hair, pushup bras, heels to make the bum more prominent, makeup, tan etc - visual impact.

*waits to be told that women dress that way for themselves and it has nothing, conscious or subconscious, to do with men*

There is nothing wrong with looking, we all do that. Its the next step, the shouting out of something, why is it some people are able to restrain themselves and others can't. Just keep it to yourself.

Nerdlingr

Is winking at someone sexual harrassment now as well?

biko

the_monkey wrote: »

OK the two guys walking alongside her was harassment sure - but "hey beautiful" ???
which were the vast majority of the comments -
thats harrasment ???... more aggressive feminism BULLSHÍT...

I suppose if you hear it 20 times a day it kinda loses its appeal...

I don't know if it's harassment per se, but it appears it's not welcome.

Chunners

Yeah it does happen a bit but Irish guys aren't that bad, they usually only do it if they are in a group and it's more a "Hey whats the story?" type comment than anything sinister. Nigerian guys are the worst IMO, to them "No" doesn't mean "No", "No" means "Lets negotiate". These are the ones who will follow you, grab your arm or stand in front of you to try stop you walking away. I find them to be creepy, intimidating ****ers myself because once they start they don't stop and if you aren't close to a shop or somewhere you can duck into to get away it can be pretty scary.

anncoates

suicide_circus wrote: »

Men are more visually triggered when it comes to arousal, nothing new there

We're talking about adult humans here with a supposed modicum of restraint. Not chimps or dogs in heat.