What women like in men...

Lucifer MorningStar

Any woman who judges a man on what shoes (brand) he's wearing either has to be a stuck up snot or a gold digger, a person you should stay well clear off imo.

The Wild Bunch

I'm a hetrosexual bloke but I would say that shoes thing is spot.

Decent shoes, a nice belt and a classy watch are pre-requisites

Penny Tration

Wishiwasa Littlebitaller wrote: »

Interesting female take on things here:

As a scruffy biker type, who has had shoulder length hair off and on for over two decades or more, I know from experience that whenever I had my hair recently styled, wore a suit or was dressing to impress in general (for a job interview, a wedding etc) I got a thousand times more attention from women. It really was and is, like night and day, compared to when I just wore casual jeans, boots and was unshaven.

Even just walking towards women on a footpath, their body language is so much different when they find you aesthetically pleasing, than if they don't, or at least it is in my experience. Of course, some women prefer the scruffy look on guys, the pubs I drink in are full of them but by and large, and aside from the physical attributes already discussed in the OP, I find that the above article is spot on about what some of the other things women find visually attractive in men.

In fairness, that's not solely a female thing. I certainly get more attention from men when I'm dressed up, than when I'm in my usual skinny jeans and top, with no make up.

I met my bf through work. He didn't notice me at all in my work uniform (slacks and a baggy hoodie because they gave me one 3 sizes too big). One day, I was training new staff, so had to dress differently. I wore a pencil skirt, a nice blouse, styled my hair and put make up on. THAT'S when he noticed me. People of both genders will notice you more when you dress well.

As for the list - load of crap, for me anyway. I've never noticed shoes, I think watches are unnecessary, and I don't care how the person greets me. I notice their smile, their accent and their height (the height thing is because I find it funny that I'm always looking up to speak to men).

Legs.Eleven

Lucifer MorningStar wrote: »

Any woman who judges a man on what shoes (brand) he's wearing either has to be a stuck up snot or a gold digger, a person you should stay well clear off imo.

I wouldn't judge the brand as I wouldn't know anything about brands and wouldn't care but subconsciously I might like down at their feet.

Tbh, I have an aversion to very groomed men, so when looking at a man, I might be giving them the up and down without even thinking (don't we all?) and part of that would be to see if he's dressed casually (my preference) or not.



There's a place between scruffy and very groomed. I don't like a man so scruffy where you're unsure whether the guy has had a shower that day or not. Hygiene would obviously be very important to me. I saw a very good-looking man on the metro the other day who looked alternativey (my cup of tea) but his hair was so greasy it was matted to his neck and it completely turned me off him.

I like unshaven men, I like hairy men, I like men who wear casual clothes (trousers, t-shirts and runners) but I don't feel attracted to a man where I'm second guessing whether or not he's cleaned himself recently.

Smart, groomed men do absolutely nothing at all for me and I've always liked 'em rugged and manly.

Legs.Eleven

Oh and I think long hair is quite niche. Not all women are going to go for that (not a fan personally) but there is a middle ground between that and groomed. I suppose it depends on the kind of woman you're looking to attract as well.

OnTheCouch

Well yes, globally speaking, like will attract like.

If a man is not particularly interested in his appearance and/or fashion, he more than likely won't end up going out with a girl for whom style is everything.

It doesn't always work like this mind you. My ex-girlfriend (even though she never said it explicitly) always seemed to be much happier when I dressed up in casual clothes as opposed to formal, for instance in a suit. And her style was quite feminine really.

I remember also for a job a good few years back now where during the week we always wore suits and on one occasion we exceptionally met at the weekend to discuss one or two urgent matters, but we could wear what we wanted as we weren't meeting clients. I was dressed casually and everyone remarked how more relaxed and confident I looked.

Now whether it is something about me and suits - although I would find this strange, or sometimes people don't always follow the obvious pattern of being attracted to a partner with a similar interest in grooming.

Lucifer MorningStar

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

Oh and I think long hair is quite niche. Not all women are going to go for that (not a fan personally) but there is a middle ground between that and groomed. I suppose it depends on the kind of woman you're looking to attract as well.

I have long non greasy hair, call me :pac:

Mr_Spaceman

Why on earth have I just opened a thread entitled "What women like in men"?

My head is wrecked.

snaphook

Brogues for Bro's aiiiiight!

Pug160

A lot of younger girls really seem to be going for the rebellious look at the moment. Beards seem to be the new addition to that look. The problem is that certain looks only suit certain people. A lot of men would be far better off looking after their skin by regularly shaving/exfoliating etc, rather than trying to copy these models in magazines who are sporting beards. Everybody is free to do what they want, but that's just my opinion on the matter.

I'm saying all of this as a fellow man, btw.

Pawwed Rig

Pug160 wrote: »

A lot of younger girls really seem to be going for the rebellious look at the moment. Beards seem to be the new addition to that look.

I had to read that a couple of times before I figured out what you meant :pac:
I had visions of Austria and eurovision

Hide behind the post

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

I had to read that a couple of times before I figured out what you meant :pac:
I had visions of Austria and eurovision

Facial hair trends go in cycles...currently its in and see more of it

Jack Skellington

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

I had to read that a couple of times before I figured out what you meant :pac:
I had visions of Austria and eurovision

Hide behind the post wrote: »

Facial hair trends go in cycles...currently its in and see more of it

Woah I really hope not

tigger123

Lucifer MorningStar wrote: »

Any woman who judges a man on what shoes (brand) he's wearing either has to be a stuck up snot or a gold digger, a person you should stay well clear off imo.

While the price of your shoes shouldn't necessarily be important, the style of them and how well kept they are is, and a lot of women will find beat up shoes a bit of a turn off, but not all I guess. I've heard women in the past say that a guy will instantly become more attractive if she notices he's wearing Converse for example.

In my experience it's far more than just the "gold digger" type who will size you up by what you're wearing. (And you only get one chance to make a first impression!)

Playboy

tigger123 wrote: »

While the price of your shoes shouldn't necessarily be important, the style of them and how well kept they are is, and a lot of women will find beat up shoes a bit of a turn off, but not all I guess. I've heard women in the past say that a guy will instantly become more attractive if she notices he's wearing Converse for example.

In my experience it's far more than just the "gold digger" type who will size you up by what you're wearing. (And you only get one chance to make a first impression!)

Converse really? Hate the things and usually they are scruffy when I see them on people as they are worn to death!

Mike747

Playboy wrote: »

Converse really? Hate the things and usually they are scruffy when I see them on people as they are worn to death!

They're awful. If you're over the age of 18 and still wearing converse you need to take a long hard look at yourself.

jaja321

Mike747 wrote: »

They're awful. If you're over the age of 18 and still wearing converse you need to take a long hard look at yourself.

Ah come on, that's a bit harsh! I think they can look great.

D'Agger

Mike747 wrote: »

They're awful. If you're over the age of 18 and still wearing converse you need to take a long hard look at yourself.

I think you're incredibly incorrect. I know plenty of people who wear cons and certainly don't need to take a look at themselves anyway, cons are shoes, they're not some sort of measurement of a persons moral fibre, while admittedly you can make observations about people based on how they present themselves, including their shoes.

Mike747

D'Agger wrote: »

I think you're incredibly incorrect. I know plenty of people who wear cons and certainly don't need to take a look at themselves anyway, cons are shoes, they're not some sort of measurement of a persons moral fibre, while admittedly you can make observations about people based on how they present themselves, including their shoes.

They're shoes for teenagers. If you're a grown man and still wear them you're going to look ridiculous.

entropi

Mike747 wrote: »

They're shoes for teenagers. If you're a grown man and still wear them you're going to look ridiculous.

I have more than one pair. If I look ridiculous wearing them in your eyes, then so be it. I won't lose any sleep over it.

It has been said to me before that a good pair of shoes and a good mattress are the two things you will need most in your life. So for buying some shoes, they might as well look decent too. Having the right pair will look presentable and make a bit of an impression I reckon.

newport2

tigger123 wrote: »

While the price of your shoes shouldn't necessarily be important, the style of them and how well kept they are is, and a lot of women will find beat up shoes a bit of a turn off, but not all I guess. I've heard women in the past say that a guy will instantly become more attractive if she notices he's wearing Converse for example.

In my experience it's far more than just the "gold digger" type who will size you up by what you're wearing. (And you only get one chance to make a first impression!)

Should we judge women by their shoes too? I don't expect that would go down too well.

"Sorry miss, you seem very nice, but I just can't stand patent leather shoes. Yuck, what a turn-off." !

On a more serious note, I'm quite into shoes, but not all men are. I certainly don't think how a man keeps his shoes is a reflection on himself. I think it's a rather populist myth that has caught on.

D'Agger

Mike747 wrote: »

They're shoes for teenagers. If you're a grown man and still wear them you're going to look ridiculous.

Decided who exactly? They're shoes, anybody, of any age can wear shoes. You deem them ridiculous, fair enough, but it's hardly definitive across the board

D'Agger

newport2 wrote: »

On a more serious note, I'm quite into shoes, but not all men are. I certainly don't think how a man keeps his shoes is a reflection on himself. I think it's a rather populist myth that has caught on.

You can draw from them the same way you can draw on how somebody keeps their other items of clothing or posessions - scruffy shoes? Might be a bit messy, polished, gleaming shoes - this person takes care of his posessions or may be tidy, again, it's one thing out of a number of things that may

I don't think anybody was leaning towards being able to see into somebodys soul via their shoes and make a judgement on that person, but it's an indicator imo

tigger123

Playboy wrote: »

Converse really? Hate the things and usually they are scruffy when I see them on people as they are worn to death!

They can look really well when they're clean and taken care of. Plus, there's tonnes of different styles and colours. And you can wear them with everything; suits, chinos, jeans, (any style) trousers, shorts etc. They're stylish and cool.

Mike747 wrote: »

They're shoes for teenagers. If you're a grown man and still wear them you're going to look ridiculous.

What do you think are acceptable shoes for an adult?

D'Agger wrote: »

You can draw from them the same way you can draw on how somebody keeps their other items of clothing or posessions - scruffy shoes? Might be a bit messy, polished, gleaming shoes - this person takes care of his posessions or may be tidy, again, it's one thing out of a number of things that may

I don't think anybody was leaning towards being able to see into somebodys soul via their shoes and make a judgement on that person, but it's an indicator imo

Exactly. We all make snap judgments everyday about people the minute we meet them, and if your unkempt or badly dressed that's the message you're presenting to people/women when you meet them for the first time.

I wouldn't date a woman who wore a beat up pair of trainers on a night out, and most women I know wouldn't date a man wearing something similar.

In my experience the shoes you're wearing matter, and women pay attention to it. But that doesn't mean they have to be expensive.

newport2

D'Agger wrote: »

You can draw from them the same way you can draw on how somebody keeps their other items of clothing or posessions - scruffy shoes? Might be a bit messy, polished, gleaming shoes - this person takes care of his posessions or may be tidy, again, it's one thing out of a number of things that may

I don't think anybody was leaning towards being able to see into somebodys soul via their shoes and make a judgement on that person, but it's an indicator imo

Or:

scruffy shoes -> easy going, laid back,
gleaming polished shoes -> poser, loves himself.




Anyway, agree with all you say (and Tigger123's comment).
I wasn't that serious about my comment. Suits me fine if women judge men by shoes, because I'll come up trumps.

Mike747

tigger123 wrote: »

They can look really well when they're clean and taken care of. Plus, there's tonnes of different styles and colours. And you can wear them with everything; suits, chinos, jeans, (any style) trousers, shorts etc. They're stylish and cool.



What do you think are acceptable shoes for an adult?



Exactly. We all make snap judgments everyday about people the minute we meet them, and if your unkempt or badly dressed that's the message you're presenting to people/women when you meet them for the first time.

I wouldn't date a woman who wore a beat up pair of trainers on a night out, and most women I know wouldn't date a man wearing something similar.

In my experience the shoes you're wearing matter, and women pay attention to it. But that doesn't mean they have to be expensive.

Any decent pair of leather shoes. Sorry, but if I see a grown man wearing converse I just think he's an overgrown teenager.

jaja321

Mike747 wrote: »

Any decent pair of leather shoes. Sorry, but if I see a grown man wearing converse I just think he's an overgrown teenager.

Luckily you aren't trying to date him then! :-) For me leather shoes can be nice, if they're a nice style. Black leather shoes with blue jeans for example would make me run a mile. I happen to like converse. It's about taste in style and everyone has different tastes in style.

ongarboy

Mike747 wrote: »

Any decent pair of leather shoes. Sorry, but if I see a grown man wearing converse I just think he's an overgrown teenager.

I would find that quite a narrow minded, judgemental view tbh!

I wear Vans (not too dissimilar from Converse) and I'm not too far away from the 40 mark and it's the pair of shoes I get the most compliments from. I've a pair of BT black leather office shoes that are the most expensive I've ever bought and while I really like them, I don't think anyone has ever passed comment on them.

In fact any of the clothes I wear ( that a lot of 20 somethings would wear but still would not look out of place on 30/40 somethings) are always the clothes that people will most compliment me on. My more expensive, neater, shall we say age appropriate clothing that I also wear never generate comments.

ragnarl

what women like in men, - looks, money and status

kiffer

ragnarl wrote: »

what women like in men, - looks, money and status

No, you've got that backwards... It's status, money, looks...
Look these are plusses in everyone's book.
all other things being equal more money, better looks, higher status, they appeal to everyone.

If you could date someone who was witty and charming, or witty and charming and loaded... moneybags would probably be the better choice...

Wit and sense of humour are tricky ones... we tend to think more highly of people we are attracted to.
So a good looking fellow gets more laughs from the same joke, told in the same way...

I know I've made excuses for terrible behaviour by attractive women, "nah, she's not a bitch it's totally a joke the way she rags on pretending to be really racist... no, no she's actually supernice"
Oh wait, I was wrong, how did I miss that? [Edit:may be a slight exaggeration]

We just see attractive people in the best light.
Female friend of mine said something similar about money... "it's not that the money is attractive, it's that the fact he's rich makes you see him I a different light".

We're all blinded by something.