Embarrasing Moments In Shops

wonderfullife

I THOUGHT my local Spar had one of those coin machines. Behind the counter. Where you can bring in 10 euro of coppers, they fire it into the machine and hand ya a tenner. Seemed simple. Emptied the piggy bank, counted out a tenner in crap, put it into a nice little bank pouch, marked €10 on the front, got to the counter and said "can i change that please?" and proceded to ask for 20 cigarettes. At which point a queue already forming behind me. Girl behind the counter says "you're going to have to empty that and seperate it as it's done by weight and there's 5 cents and 2 cents mixed together there".

Ended up having to go over to a ledge beside the counter and seperate a tenners worth of 1 cent, 2 cents and 5 cents with everybody looking at me with that look of "maybe i should give him change he might be homeless"! In future the change is staying where it belongs, all over the floor and in jeans pockets! MORTO

The Royal Scam

I posted this before in the "whats the most retarded thing..." thread before

was aged about 10 and in nutgrove sc and checking a new fancy cycling cap (like the ones sean kelly used to wear ) they had, it was real slick and low profile.
I struggled to put that b@stard on for 10 mins until the shop owner came over and told me it was a saddle cover

say_who_now?

The Royal Scam wrote: »

I posted this before in the "whats the most retarded thing..." thread before

was aged about 10 and in nutgrove sc and checking a new fancy cycling cap (like the ones sean kelly used to wear ) they had, it was real slick and low profile.
I struggled to put that b@stard on for 10 mins until the shop owner came over and told me it was a saddle cover

OHHH FÚCK, I have to stop reading this thread before I cough up a lung! :pac:

mauzo

The Royal Scam wrote: »

I posted this before in the "whats the most retarded thing..." thread before

was aged about 10 and in nutgrove sc and checking a new fancy cycling cap (like the ones sean kelly used to wear ) they had, it was real slick and low profile.
I struggled to put that b@stard on for 10 mins until the shop owner came over and told me it was a saddle cover

The 1st time I read that I peed a little!

Still has the same effect the 2nd time

gavmcg92

My mate was in HMV in Dundrum looking at CDs. There was a postcard/book stand behind him. He backed up into what he thought was the stand, quickly swung his hand behind him to try and catch it and stop it from falling... long story short, he grabbed a middle aged woman's private parts who was leaning over him to try and get at a CD above him.

Ehrmantraut

I have a knack for getting flustered and mixing up my phrases when greeting shopkeeps. Instead of "how's it going?" or "how ya doing?" I'll ask "how's it doing?"

mauzo

Ehrmantraut wrote: »

I have a knack for getting flustered and mixing up my phrases when greeting shopkeeps. Instead of "how's it going?" or "how ya doing?" I'll ask "how's it doing?"

Im a bit like that. Ill walk up to the counter and they'll say 'hi there' and ill go 'yeah grand thanks you?'

Was sitting in a takeaway waiting for someone in the queue a few years back. Middle aged man comes to the door with his son who I guessed was about maybe six years of age. The father stops at the door and gives some money to the child, sending him up to order the food (dunno, teaching him to interact with the rest of the world I suppose).

Anyway, the boy gets to the counter and reels off what the dad's just told him to repeat. This place sells almost entirely chicken, except they seem to be out of what he's been told to ask for. The girl at the counter is leaning over explaining this, but the kid's only five or six and hasn't a notion of what she's on about. He's looking back at the father with a confused expression, so the girl serving, who's completely flat chested, roars across the shop to the dad "I don't have any breasts!"

Needless to say the words had barely left her mouth before she realised what she just said. The dad nearly wet himself, the rest of the shop nearly choked, and the poor young one looked like she wanted the ground to open up and swallow her.

the groutch

castletownman wrote: »

I parked my "boy-racer" car outside the local shop once. Went in just to buy something and the daggers I was getting from the shop keeper were unreal. Now what I was wearing what could be deemed as "scumbag" attire (I was just home from work and slipped into a tracksuit for comfort), but I felt offended.

Joke's on him though because as the shopkeeper followed me out the door making sure I wasn't shoplifting his precious store, apparently some old lady in the shop at the same time fleeced his till!

what was that ad for?

Popsy

My first embarassing story happened a few summers ago in Dunnes grocery in Blanchardstown. I was wearing a strapless maxi dress and while pushing the trolley I felt something tugging on my dress. My dress was wrapping around the wheel of the trolley but I managed to stop it before I had 'an incident'. Off I went laughing to myself and being very careful with my trolley when I felt another tug. Someone had walked close by me with their trolley and caught my dress, by the time I realised what was going on the dress was down under my boobs exposing my lovely strapless bra while I'm running after the lady asking her to stop pushing her trolley. I still cringe thinking about that one.

Second one, would be my Dad bringing me into a shoe shop for a pair of runners when I was about twelve. Dad asked the guy how much the runners were and I think he said 30 pound. My Dad then decided to haggle with the man offering him a tenner for the runners, he even involved me, telling the man I'd be bullied if I didnt get them and to look at my sad face. He got the runners for 20 pound in the end.

Thatsfootball

the groutch wrote: »

what was that ad for?

FBD I think!

Martyn1989

Myself, my gf and a few friends where at a 24 hour garage hatch after a few cans when we where teenagers, after being served I turned and walked up to the person a few paces behind me as I absentmindedly struggled to stuff my belongings into my pocket. Thinking this was my gf I stood right infront of 'her' and looked up to kiss her, turned out to be some taxi driver with one of those big red knobbly noses. I got the fright of my life.

thror

Not me but,

Two female friends of mine were out clothes shopping when we were in college and had been getting a bit giddy throughout the day after having a couple of pints with their lunch.

Girl A, let's call her Mary goes in to try something on in the changing rooms, Girl B, let's call her Dolly follows her in a few minutes later to see how she's getting on.

Dolly opens up the cubicle door which Mary left ajar and sees her bent over in her knickers picking something up off the floor. Given the giddy mood they are both in, Dolly decides it would be fun to shout "HOWYA NOW?!?!" at the top of her voice and gives Mary an almighty stingy slap on the arse. Mary spins around...

and it's not Mary at all, it's some random middle aged woman standing there in her bra and knickers having just been screamed at and slapped on the arse by a complete stranger.

Dolly and Mary (as soon as she hears what had happened) skedaddle.

girlonfire

thror wrote: »

Not me but,

Two female friends of mine were out clothes shopping when we were in college and had been getting a bit giddy throughout the day after having a couple of pints with their lunch.

Girl A, let's call her Mary goes in to try something on in the changing rooms, Girl B, let's call her Dolly follows her in a few minutes later to see how she's getting on.

Dolly opens up the cubicle door which Mary left ajar and sees her bent over in her knickers picking something up off the floor. Given the giddy mood they are both in, Dolly decides it would be fun to shout "HOWYA NOW?!?!" at the top of her voice and gives Mary an almighty stingy slap on the arse. Mary spins around...

and it's not Mary at all, it's some random middle aged woman standing there in her bra and knickers having just been screamed at and slapped on the arse by a complete stranger.

Dolly and Mary (as soon as she hears what had happened) skedaddle.

Absolutely hilarious:D

bbam

Years ago I brought my daughter then three into the library to choose a book or two, small town place so not big at all.
We were both going about our business checking out the books. She was about two isles away when I heard her break wind, followed at the top of her voice by "it's ok daddy, just windies but no poos".

There were about six people in the place including two librarians and we all fell about laughing. I was scarlet though.

Plazaman

Went into a chemist to buy haemaroid cream. So I thought OK, not a big challenge, and shouldn't be a particularly embarrasing thing to ask for, it's a common ailment for a lot of people. Unfortunatley my brain thought other wise and I got a dose of the dyslexic stutters..

"Can I get a tube of Perper...Pepperslation H.....Perspiration...."

All of a sudden I see the shelf where the Preparation H is and beside it is Anusol, same stuff and will be easier to say.....

"Actually I take a..an.. arseandall... arseuhaul...assanol."

It was probably only a couple of seconds of spluttering but seemed like a week and my head was about to explode with how red it was getting. Thankfully through my spit fit, the girl knows what I want comes back with the box in a bag and the rest of transaction was done in silence.

As I was going out the door she says "Mind yourself crossing the street love" in that sweet voice you use for kids which had since led me to believe she probably assumed I was "special".

ShadowHearth

So me and misses were walking pass maplins and I sow a battery charger in there. So we walked in and I was having a look at that thing. A very helpful member of staff came over and said: how are you!! I looked at him and said: good, you? So would this fully charge battery or what's the story? Fella looked at me confused and then started answering my questions as any salesman. I thanked him and we walked away. I picked up some other item and then we went to the till.
While we waiting misses said:
-what's wrong with you?
-nothing, why?
-do you feel okay?
-yeah, why?
- well that was James we were just talking to...
-who? James? ...... Oh****!!!!!!

That was a buddy I haven't seen few years!!!! I felt so crapy and embarrassed !!!! I just did not remembered him at all! I dropped everything and went back to apologise!!! Had a good laugh, and spend talking good half an hour with him after. Got his number and all.

Dub Ste

Not embarrassing,but I loved it.
I was making a curry one weekend and had to go into town to get all the bits and bobs I needed.
Got into the Asian supermarket and was getting the stuff I needed,when the moment I was waiting for arrived.

I know this is childish,purile,and totally junevile,but I'd been waiting for it since I'd gotten out of bed that morning.

Stood in the aisle in the shop looking helpless,the assistant came over and asked if she could help,and I said...........

I can't find your ghee anywhere,can you show me where you keep your ghee.

It was my moment of glory,shame it was only me there ....:D

cgc5483

As a young fella I was sent to the supermarket to pick up a cut of meat for the dinner. Having done this several times before it should have been a pretty easy job except of course the shop was after been done up so nothing was where it was supposed to be. After 5 mins of searching I decided to ask one of the assistants where was "the pig in the bag" assumming that was what everyone called it and not just my family. After he stopped laughing the assistant brought me over to his friend and made me repeat to him what i wanted. Cue another minute of giggles ......

Genghiz Cohen

ShadowHearth wrote: »

Got his number and all.

:eek::P:D:pac:

ShadowHearth

Genghiz Cohen wrote: »

:eek::P:D:pac:

A Jaysus!!!! Give me some slack, will ya!!!!

Genghiz Cohen

ShadowHearth wrote: »

A Jaysus!!!! Give me some 'slack', will ya!!!!

Call up your friend, I'm sure he'll oblige.

razor425

In Centra about 6 months ago, getting some food to cure a hangover for myself and a few of the lads. Had picked up a few bits and pieces and decided I wanted some chicken fillets. Went to the counter asked for 2 chicken fillets from the nice big breasted assistant. She replied are these 2 ok(she picked up the first 2 she saw) Me in my hungover state replied, no can I have the 2 biggest breasts you have please. Cue the rest of the lads roaring out laughing. Didnt realise what I had said til I had left the shop.

Blitzkrieger

Does it count if you're on the other side of the counter?

As a spotty 19 year old working in a take away I once asked an attractive 17 year old in a low cut top if she "..wants salt and vinegar on tits".

Thankfully I don't think she noticed my Freudian slip, but my co-worker nearly choked trying not to laugh.

Sykk

Also not me!

Anyway my mother was having a fight with her other half while they were in shopping. She left him and walked down the fruit lane by herself and picked a grape or two and started munching away, a store employee saw her and said "Excuse me ma'am, you're not allowed eat the grapes".. To his shock the sweet looking little 60 year old lady responded "Would you ever fúck off!"

Glad I wasn't there

Lima Golf

I was in New Look one day shopping with my sister. They had a few rails set up in the middle of the shop floor with underwear, which was on sale. So my sister and I are standing looking through the stuff on the rail when I find something that I like (little black and pink number!) hold it out towards her and say "what do you think of these" I get no reply from her so I look up to see some strange woman beside me going "erm..ya...they're nice" rather than explain the whole my sister was standing where you are now story I just went "em....thanks"

stealinhorses

I was in Tower Records a few years ago, buying a CD or something. Normally, when I go up to the till I say "thanks" and "hi", etc., but sometimes I just nod and don't say anything to the cashier. That was the day when I didn't say anything, I didn't have my earphones in or anything, I just quietly walked up to the till, gave the product to the cashier, paid him, got my change, took the CD, looked at him, nodded with appreciation and walked towards the exit.
Just as I was about to step outside I heard someone absolutely scream at the top of their voice: "YOU COULD AT LEAST SAY THANK YOU!!!". I turned around in shock and saw the cashier staring at me with the most violent expression I've ever seen someone looking at me with. Obviously he was having a bad day and I was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back, but as I froze and looked back at him I realised the whole store went completely quiet. You could cut the tension with a knife as everyone waited to see what was going to happen. I felt like I was in a movie, having an argument with my wife in public or something, I just looked at the cashier in horror, half-murmured "thank you" in a broken voice and left agonisingly embarrassed despite not having done anything terrible.

I felt bad afterwards though, he was a nice guy.

Mr Keek

Ehrmantraut wrote: »

I have a knack for getting flustered and mixing up my phrases when greeting shopkeeps. Instead of "how's it going?" or "how ya doing?" I'll ask "how's it doing?"

I bet my house house, you've also said, 'Thanks you'

Posted this before, but feck it.

In the Centra at the corner of Moore St and Parnell St in (Dublin) town, queuing at the deli for a roll. Junkie-type bloke in front of me is next up but refuses being served by the black girl making the sambos. In fact, he insists that the white bloke who's restocking the lettuce etc. is the one that will serve him.

The poor black girl is a bit stunned and says, "What did you say?" He replies, "I said, i don't want you going NEAR me roll, i want him to make it". By this stage, most of the shop is deathly silent and staring over wondering whats gonna happen next, including the big black security guard.

The white bloke behind the counter notices that something is up, so turns and asks what the story is. The junkie says, "I want a ham and cheese roll, no butter, but i want you to make it. Not her". The deli-guy says "why?", and your man replies:

"Cos she's ****e at making rolls"!!! The whole place lets out a collective sigh of relief, and i couldn't help but think that it was US who were the one's being discriminatory, as every one of us expected him to be some sort of racist

Lady Chatterton

My most embarrassing moment in a shop :o:o