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'I Wouldnt ride her into battle', 'Her face looks like a bag of bent euros'

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    #422
    Happyman42
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,066 ✭✭✭✭Happyman42


    keysersoze0330 wrote: »
    Few hunger related ones i've heard through the years ( sorry if already posted)

    I'd eat the balls of a low flying crow
    I'd eat the arse of a nun through a gap in a convent gate
    I'd eat the arse of a small child through the rungs of a cot

    I'd ate the leg of the lamb of God! :D

    I know somebody who missed his Christmas dinner for saying that at the table, way back when we where good little Catholics.:D


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    #423
    AeoNGriM
    Registered Users Posts: 712 ✭✭✭AeoNGriM


    Fanny like a ripped out fireplace

    Fanny like a badly packed kebab

    Face like a painters radio

    She looks like she puts her makeup on with a shotgun

    :D


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    #424
    Nothingbetter2d
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,037 ✭✭✭Nothingbetter2d


    keysersoze0330 wrote: »
    Few hunger related ones i've heard through the years ( sorry if already posted)

    I'd eat the balls of a low flying crow
    I'd eat the arse of a nun through a gap in a convent gate
    I'd eat the arse of a small child through the rungs of a cot

    i'd eat the hind legs of a scabby horse


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    #425
    Splinter
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 3,331 ✭✭✭Splinter


    admiralofthefleet wrote: »
    work/shove it up the eye of your prick/back end of your bollox

    said to someone when they ask you if you want something
    Bite the back of my sack is one i use for this to be honest


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    #426
    Jimmy Macnulty
    Registered Users Posts: 108 ✭✭Jimmy Macnulty


    Ara lick me arshe


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    #427
    Mink
    Registered Users Posts: 2,260 ✭✭✭Mink


    He's as much use as a back pocket on a vest


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    #428
    Mairzydoats
    Registered Users Posts: 71 ✭✭Mairzydoats


    Des Kelly wouldn't lay her.


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    #429
    watercarrier
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 78 ✭✭watercarrier


    face like a dog ****'in razor blades.


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    #430
    LiamSevenfold
    Registered Users Posts: 39 ✭LiamSevenfold


    Cheers to everyone who posted, There are still people with a good sense of humor out there afterall :)


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    #431
    milltown
    Registered Users Posts: 4,613 ✭✭✭milltown


    I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.
    followed by...
    I'm as full as a fat woman's shoe.

    I hope your ears turn to arseholes and sh1t on your shoulders.

    She could suck start a Harley Davidson.

    For a lady who could do with a bit of a trim "downstairs":
    I didn't know whether to ride it or wipe my feet on it.

    Similar for the underarms:
    She looked like she had Don King in a headlock.

    Sweating like a glass-blowers arse.

    As welcome as a sh1te after a shower.

    As dim as a 5 watt bulb.


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    #432
    Daveysil15
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,301 ✭✭✭Daveysil15


    As welcome as a fart in a spacesuit.

    She's a head of hair like a fat mans crotch.

    As much use as a trap door on a life boat.


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    #433
    JustAddWater
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,990 ✭✭✭JustAddWater


    She has an arse like a badly packed parachute


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    #434
    Bobby Baccala
    Registered Users Posts: 7,341 ✭✭✭Bobby Baccala


    I've seen harder men on wedding cakes.


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    #435
    ruthloss
    Closed Accounts Posts: 637 ✭✭✭ruthloss


    I worship the ground he slithers on.


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    #436
    BillyMitchel
    Registered Users Posts: 3,324 ✭✭✭BillyMitchel


    P4DDY2K11 wrote: »
    I've seen harder men on wedding cakes.

    Or to a wanna be hard man.. I've had harder ****s


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    #437
    ruthloss
    Closed Accounts Posts: 637 ✭✭✭ruthloss


    Jaazus, you'd have to carbon date her!!


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    #438
    deisebibo
    Registered Users Posts: 132 ✭✭deisebibo


    The amount of alcohol it would take for me to sleep with you would actually kill me.


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    #439
    DazMarz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,493 ✭✭✭DazMarz


    A raging horn you could hang a door off...


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    #440
    christmas2012
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,827 ✭✭✭christmas2012


    hes a face like a fvucked up potatoe


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    #441
    evillive
    Registered Users Posts: 445 ✭✭evillive


    not gonna trawl though them all, but

    a face like a melted wheelie bin

    a fanny like a wizards sleeve

    riding her would be like throwing a sausage up o'connell street


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    #442
    Slattsy
    Registered Users Posts: 15,775 ✭✭✭✭Slattsy


    He's about as useful as a c0ck flavoured lollipop.

    He's not the fizziest drink in the fridge.


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    #443
    admiralofthefleet
    Closed Accounts Posts: 15,515 ✭✭✭✭admiralofthefleet


    she's as thick as the knot on a footballers tie


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    #444
    Bluesteel7
    Registered Users Posts: 1,050 ✭✭✭Bluesteel7


    She has a fanny like a melted cheese sandwich.


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    #445
    Starscream25
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,122 ✭✭✭Starscream25


    I'd swim upstream against a river of piss just to suck the dick of the last guy who ****ed her.............oh wait, sorry wrong thread.


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    #446
    Esoteric_
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,255 ✭✭✭✭Esoteric_


    Starscream25 wrote: »
    I'd swim upstream against a river of piss just to suck the dick of the last guy who ****ed her.............oh wait, sorry wrong thread.

    jesus. :eek:


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    #447
    DazMarz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,493 ✭✭✭DazMarz


    She'd give the horn to a snowman...


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    #448
    L.Jenkins
    Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 19,240 Mod ✭✭✭✭L.Jenkins


    "Your as tight as a Camels árse in a snow storm"

    "A Sniper wouldn't take you out!"


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    #449
    AllthingsCP
    Registered Users Posts: 680 ✭✭✭AllthingsCP


    If your insulting someone that is skinny {Name is Tommy},

    Tommy the only one i know that can look through s keyhole with two eyes.

    Sure she has a fanny like the top of a well used welly boot.

    Remark about a small person. Called lol Tommy again


    Sure Tommys sueing {Shops Name} after falling off the ladder painting the curb.

    Or tommy is sueing {Shops Name} after the Welly Boots cut the arse off him.


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    #450
    AllthingsCP
    Registered Users Posts: 680 ✭✭✭AllthingsCP


    Starscream25 wrote: »
    I'd swim upstream against a river of piss just to suck the dick of the last guy who ****ed her.............oh wait, sorry wrong thread.

    lol


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    #451
    PizzamanIRL
    Registered Users Posts: 5,148 ✭✭✭PizzamanIRL


    Starscream25 wrote: »
    I'd swim upstream against a river of piss just to suck the dick of the last guy who ****ed her.............oh wait, sorry wrong thread.

    Wrong forum too. LGBT is the one for you.


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