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would you allow 5yr old son dress as girl?

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    #122
    TheZohanS
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,582 ✭✭✭✭TheZohanS


    Links234 wrote: »
    Zohan's idea of good parenting is a "kick up the hole", so he's hardly worth arguing with


    Lol, good man. ;)


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    #123
    Links234
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,944 ✭✭✭✭Links234


    Jake1 wrote: »
    Would you mind if I asked had you children? Im not trying to be a smart arse, just curious.
    If so, would you allow your son to play out in a dress? Equally if he wanted to wear a dress for his communion, like that boy in the pics earlier, would you really honestly be okay with that? Knowing the possible abuse the child would suffer?

    no, I don't have children, but I was bullied as a child and I know what it's like.

    but what really gets to me, is this kowtowing to the bully mentality. I constantly hear that in reference to gay adoption, that the child would probably be bullied. but the fault lies 100% with the bullies.

    kids get bullied over wearing glasses, do you get glasses for your child that has a sight defect, knowing the possible abuse the child would suffer? same principle.

    I think it's very wrong thinking that a child should change on account of bullies, because that just feeds into their self confidence, and if a kid is made to feel guilt and shame over their expression, interests, or things they can't help, then I think that's gonna be really damaging. I would much rather have been told to hold my head high as a kid, and not care what other people think, because that's something that I didn't learn until much later in life, and it's something pretty essential in life too. instead, I was made to feel ashamed that I wasn't like other kids, or that I wasn't into sports. I was made to feel ashamed that I was sensitive. how the hell is that good for anyone?


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    #124
    Links234
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,944 ✭✭✭✭Links234


    TheZohan wrote: »
    Lol, good man woman. ;)

    fixed it for you


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    #125
    Biggins
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭Biggins


    Links234 wrote: »
    Zohan's idea of good parenting is a "kick up the hole", so he's hardly worth arguing with
    Aaa.. bless ya, you don't really know the Zohan like we do. :pac:

    Your lucky! :D


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    #126
    TheZohanS
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,582 ✭✭✭✭TheZohanS


    Links234 wrote: »
    fixed it for you

    Weren't you born a dude?


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    #127
    Dermighty
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,748 ✭✭✭Dermighty


    Kimono-Girl wrote: »
    my 1 and a half year old daughter wears jeans and rugby jersey's as well as her girly clothes, she plays with rugby balls, Lego, and cars alongside her more girly toys, is that wrong?

    Yes. Throw her in the wood chipper before it's too late. I recommend the Craftsman 2 way 305cc.


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    #128
    XxMCRxBabyxX
    Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 7,439 Mod ✭✭✭✭XxMCRxBabyxX


    Links234 wrote: »
    first thing is that knowing the attitudes of people in after hours, I'd bet a lot of you would be up in arms about publicizing that a child is adopted, because there's a stigma that there's something wrong about being adopted and that kids might bully a child for that. instead of secrecy or shame about it, we are shown a child that is very happy and I think challenging the stigma attatched to adoptive children publically, is far better than them living with shame from it.

    Do you genuinely believe this?

    there is a huge difference between parading a young boy's (considered unusual) habit all over TV and revealing that a child is adopted. For starters there are hugely different acceptance rates between the two and also the second isn't as likely to raise mental issues in the child in future if he decides that he now likes boy clothes.

    An adopted child knows that he is adopted and will most likely come to terms with that in some way or another. To parade a child around for 'being different' is disgusting imo and could really come back to screw him up in the future.

    None of that is saying that I have a problem with the boy dressing as he wishes. Just the way the parents are trying to cash in on it rather than just let him be. Watch that video. That poor little boy looks absolutely petrified. Could you really do that to your own child?


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    #129
    Maddison
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,594 ✭✭✭Maddison


    The parents of that child deserve to get a bloody good smack on the arses. Children role play, Its a part of growing up, we have all played mammies & daddys, doctors & nurses and yes Ive been stung with the daddy role myself. My son is very much a boyish boy but if he were to try on my make up thats fine because Its only PLAY. I think most of our parents have photos of us as children that they whip out to our boyfriends/girlfriends at some stage in order to get a giggle. My family blew up phots of my brother wearing a dress for his 21st. But It was him PLAYING. The parents of that child are making a mockery of what all children do at some time or another & making what is innocent not so. Do they not realise that there are sick ****s out there that could possibly get 'kicks' out of that video?


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    #130
    RichieC
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,333 ✭✭✭RichieC


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1taC3JjIOkM


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    #131
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    azezil wrote: »
    Correct

    That sounds like you're contradicting what you just said.


    No... you took my sentence & edited it to make it seem like I was contradicting myself, but I clearly wasn't.

    I can do the same with you post.

    Watch...
    azezil wrote: »

    That sounds like you're contradicting


    No, I'm not. You're editing of my sentence only made it look that way, don't you agree?
    azezil wrote: »
    Correct - what you just said.

    Thanks, I knew you'd see it my way.


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    #132
    AckwelFoley
    Registered Users Posts: 12,556 ✭✭✭✭AckwelFoley


    My grandfather was dressed as a girl at that age - and that was nearly 100 years ago - they wanted a girl so for the first few years dressed him as one.


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    #133
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    TheZohan wrote: »
    Weren't you born a dude?


    Weren't you born under a bridge?


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    #134
    ashyle
    Registered Users Posts: 699 ✭✭✭ashyle


    It's fine for a 5 year old to dress whichever way he wants. Stage parents on the other hand... yuck


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    #135
    FatherTed
    Registered Users Posts: 2,684 ✭✭✭FatherTed


    It seems the kid or the parents don't have a problem with it.

    It's other people who have a problem with it. Maybe they should look at themselves and their own issues.


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    #136
    Micky Dolenz
    Registered Users Posts: 44,080 ✭✭✭✭Micky Dolenz


    Any more flaming = Bans.


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    #137
    ashyle
    Registered Users Posts: 699 ✭✭✭ashyle


    Food for thought. kids are kids.


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    #138
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    Conor D wrote: »
    @starbelgrade
    @Mussolini

    My statement is what it is. Regardless of Hemmingway's suicide he was regarded as one of the greatest journalists of all time before moving into writing novels where he was regarded equally in high regard. Dito Nicholson in acting.

    Both made a name for themselves as womanisers.

    I am not saying either means 'success' however I am addressing the 2 main concerns people may have regarding putting a boy in girls clothes:

    1 Will this mean the boy will be homosexual
    2 Will this mean the boy may not succeed because of confusion

    PLEASE NOTE:

    I DID NOT SAY there is anything wrong with being homosexual or with not reaching your potential.

    I DID SAY what we wear as kids doesn't amount to a hill of beans

    Hemingway was an alcoholic, a wife-beater, a liar and a fraud. He suffered greatly with depression, anxiety and paranoia. He spent the last year of his life convinced the CIA were after him. Numerous members of his family killed themselves.


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    #139
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    Is it important to explain to the kids what the clothes mean? Sure the kid may think of them as just clothes, later in life he may be pissed at the folks for letting him make a fool of himself.


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    #140
    Jane Eyre
    Registered Users Posts: 127 ✭✭Jane Eyre


    There's nothing wrong with a five year old dressing up as a girl. Would anyone object if he wanted to dress up as a gorilla? Honest to God, my son wore his Spiderman costume every day for three months. I had to wash it while he was asleep.
    Dressing up is part of growing up. And if he's ten and still wants to dress as a girl, maybe then its time to explain that its unusual (not abnormal) but he will have figured it out by then.
    Let the kid be a kid I say!


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    #141
    stripysocks85
    Registered Users Posts: 1,877 ✭✭✭stripysocks85


    I teach 4/5 year olds.

    A boy in my class raves about Friday being 'Costume Day' and informs me of his princess costume and such. Same boy took a doll to school one day to play with.

    His mother was a little concerned and said she's trying to wean him out of it.

    I told her that she need not have any huge concerns - he's only 5! Boys [and girls!] at that age look to pretend, to engage in fantasy play, and the make believe. Whilst I don't think parading him around and labelling him as 'Princess Boy' or whatever is appropriate, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a 5 year old boy dressing up in girls clothing.

    5 year old girls often put their Mammy's high heels on and wear lipstick - is this wrong?

    Young children adore play and make believe. Let them be children.

    I've heard some boys in my class say 'Oh no pink is a girls colour!' - Where do they get such silly nonsense?! Clearly at home such stereotypes like 'blue is a boys colour/skirts are for girls' are encouraged at home, when really, there shouldn't be such a huge emphasis.


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    #142
    stovelid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    If there was some way I could exploit it for commercial gain: yes.


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    #143
    Tesco Massacre
    Registered Users Posts: 814 ✭✭✭Tesco Massacre


    Allow it? I'd encourage it.


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    #144
    WindSock
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,239 ✭✭✭✭WindSock


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    Is it important to explain to the kids what the clothes mean? Sure the kid may think of them as just clothes, later in life he may be pissed at the folks for letting him make a fool of himself.


    Why is it foolish to wear these clothes?


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    #145
    Iwasfrozen
    Registered Users Posts: 16,250 ✭✭✭✭Iwasfrozen


    Tesco Massacre wrote: »
    Allow it? I'd encourage it.
    ?


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    #146
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    WindSock wrote: »
    Why is it foolish to wear these clothes?
    Cause he would be laughed at.

    If he doesen't cop that the clothes are girls clothes and just thinks of all clothes as the same, when he eventually cops on he may be pissed.

    "Why did you let me wear girls clothes ffs?"


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    #147
    WindSock
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,239 ✭✭✭✭WindSock


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    Cause he would be laughed at.

    If he doesen't cop that the clothes are girls clothes and just thinks of all clothes as the same, when he eventually cops on he may be pissed.

    "Why did you let me wear girls clothes ffs?"

    What if he were more pissed because he wasn't allowed wear them?


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    #148
    Wolfe Tone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,670 ✭✭✭✭Wolfe Tone


    WindSock wrote: »
    What if he were more pissed because he wasn't allowed wear them?
    Thats why I am saying to teach the kid the difference, then let him decide


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    #149
    coffee_cake
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Politics Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 81,310 CMod ✭✭✭✭coffee_cake


    I think the kid would be more embarrassed in the 'god I was on tv as a kid, cringe' way than anything else. Or 'what the hell was up with that perm??' kind of way.


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    #150
    WindSock
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,239 ✭✭✭✭WindSock


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    Thats why I am saying to teach the kid the difference, then let him decide

    Why should there be a difference?


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    #151
    Iwasfrozen
    Registered Users Posts: 16,250 ✭✭✭✭Iwasfrozen


    MUSSOLINI wrote: »
    Thats why I am saying to teach the kid the difference, then let him decide
    Why in the name of God would you allow a five year old child to decide what type of clothes to wear? Children at that age don't have any sense.


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