Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

Kaching

Your Text Here wrote: »

Don't just be a statistic, there's a way out *hugs*

And a *hug* for you too Kaching.

according to my psych theres no way out and you just have to learn to deal with it . Gotta love his optimism :rolleyes:

cloud493

stupidusername wrote: »

Can you please tell me what happened when you did it? there's something about it putting me off and i just need to know what it involves.

I've seen the psych on call in an Accident and emergency. They were ok, if you feel that bad, I recommend going, don't think about it, just go.

LegacyUser

Had a couple of good weeks but now it feels like I'm back at square one.

It just seems like everything I touch is falling apart.

Kaching

I want to disappear wrote: »

Had a couple of good weeks but now it feels like I'm back at square one.

It just seems like everything I touch is falling apart.

Hug . I cant give you comforting words because I cant help myself at the minute .wish I could help

Seren_

stupidusername wrote: »

Can you please tell me what happened when you did it? there's something about it putting me off and i just need to know what it involves.

Basically the exact same as what starviewadams said. I'm going to split it into little points to make it easier to follow (if you're anything like what I'm like when I was bad, reading big chunks of stuff is impossible)

First of all you're seen by the triage nurse and get some bloods taken (that's what they do in Naas anyway, I don't know is it the same in all of them), and they have a chat for a few minutes as well to see what's up.

After that I was seen by one of the a&e doctors who asked about general health and stuff, and then after another while I saw the psychiatrist. The psych talked to me for about an hour first of all, they do a consult which involves asking questions to get a proper diagnosis (just to see if there are any other possible mental illnesses).

Then after that they asked how was I feeling and just to talk about what sort of ways the suicidal feelings were manifesting themselves, and then just generally what had been going on and stuff. I found it easier than a counselling session at that time because the psych was asking questions, so I didn't have to come up with stuff off the bat.

After that, the psychiatrist asked to speak to my friend who was with me (or they asked to be allowed ring one of them the times I was there on my own). You have to wait another little while, and then they call you back in and tell you what they think is the best thing to do e.g. a change in meds, referral to the community psych services or whatever. The nurses who work with the community psych service are usually lovely. They ring or visit every few days to make sure you're getting on okay.

There is a good bit of waiting around, so if you go, bring something to keep yourself occupied I found it a help any time I went in, and believe me I usually did not want to go in the first place. Hope that helps x

Seren_

Kaching wrote: »

according to my psych theres no way out and you just have to learn to deal with it . Gotta love his optimism :rolleyes:

Feck that Kaching, there is a way out of everything. I know you think there isn't at the minute but there is. I'm not there yet either, but all you can do is try. Be nice to yourself and try and distract yourself from the bad thoughts. Watch crap tv that you don't have to think about (I've basically seen all of Two and a Half Men due to watching it from when I was down, even though it's awful ), watch funny videos on youtube, or play some silly games (sporcle.com and mindjolt.com are two good ones).

Kaching

how dare you call 2 an a half men crap.
wish there was a magic pill

Seren_

Well I can hardly call it good Saw me through some bad times though, so do have a bit of a soft spot for it

I wish there was a magic pill too, it would make life so much easier. I also wish there was a magic study pill, so I could actually sit down and do something for my exam tomorrow

stupidusername

Thanks for all the input.

And the paragraphs, I avoid reading so much stuff on here, cause I can't face the chunks

Ok well it doesn't sound so bad. I think I have visions of not being allowed leave, or make your own decisions once you go in. Though contacting someone I know doesn't sit well with me, but at least it doesn't have to be family.

I'll just see how I go I suppose. Hopefully I'll be ok till next Thursday and hopefully then they'll come up with a solution. Ideally I'd come off my meds (and be ok), and be given a therapy appointment for some time soon. But somehow I doubt it.

Another thing though, does anybody have a real problem with admitting to feeling that bad to a doctor / psych when they ask how you've been? I couldn't admit it to my very first doctor a few years back, and if I had I'd have been in counselling by now. I hate saying it.

cloud493

stupidusername wrote: »

Thanks for all the input.

And the paragraphs, I avoid reading so much stuff on here, cause I can't face the chunks

Ok well it doesn't sound so bad. I think I have visions of not being allowed leave, or make your own decisions once you go in. Though contacting someone I know doesn't sit well with me, but at least it doesn't have to be family.

I'll just see how I go I suppose. Hopefully I'll be ok till next Thursday and hopefully then they'll come up with a solution. Ideally I'd come off my meds (and be ok), and be given a therapy appointment for some time soon. But somehow I doubt it.

Another thing though, does anybody have a real problem with admitting to feeling that bad to a doctor / psych when they ask how you've been? I couldn't admit it to my very first doctor a few years back, and if I had I'd have been in counselling by now. I hate saying it.

When I was there It was easy as pie And yeah, I get that. When they ask I just say 'yeah its alright'

Kaching

stupidusername wrote: »

Another thing though, does anybody have a real problem with admitting to feeling that bad to a doctor / psych when they ask how you've been? I couldn't admit it to my very first doctor a few years back, and if I had I'd have been in counselling by now. I hate saying it.

At first is was a pride thing with me . Now I just dont want to say it because I always get the feeling that when I say it now they half expect it and are mentally rolling their eyes at me

girlonfire

I'm at my wits end here:(
I'm in a constant state of anxiety. I feel sick to my stomach sitting here. I feel totally overwhelmed by different things happening in my life at the moment. I've got exams coming up in the next few days and I've tried and tried to study and the concentration just isn't there. I feel completely on edge. I haven't slept during the night for about two weeks now so I'm just sleeping for a few hours here and there throughout the day.
I am so ****ing sick of this.

starviewadams

Could you go to your doc and explain to him/her about your problems sleeping?I know when I don't get proper sleep I feel even worse then usual.

neemish

I've had depression/anxiety for a LONG time, and still have good/bad/completely s%&t days.

For years, it seemed like there was no hope. all my GP could offer me was a shoulder to cry on and the assurance that "there's a key to this somewhere, we just have to find it"

and do you know what, she was right. Baby steps all the way but there are better days.

I've been working with a psychotherapist for about six years now, I'm with my current one for three years.
I was in hospital twice last year, once for a twelve week "stretch" and had to change meds a couple of times, but my life is actually improving.

The biggest thing I've learned is about asking for help. Ringing people to make an emergency appt if I need it, or just saying "I'm suicidal today". I still hate myself, i still think of harming myself, i still have problems. But I'm less afraid of being "locked up" or if people will think I'm mad. Feck it, if I need help I'm going to get it.

So what I would say is go to A and E, go into hospital, find some one you can really talk to. We are not just statistics, we are people and we deserve better than a line at the end of a news bulletin saying "there were no suspicious circumstances"

cloud493

I just feel absolutely dreadful at the moment but I hate going to the doctor and asking for more anti depressants.

girlonfire

starviewadams wrote: »

Could you go to your doc and explain to him/her about your problems sleeping?I know when I don't get proper sleep I feel even worse then usual.

Thanks starview. Yeah, I suppose I should do that. I find it very hard to sleep without sleeping tablets but I don't want to be taking them all the time either you know?
So now, I'm at home alone drinking instead of studying. Very sensible of me. I just want to escape so badly.

stupidusername

will you at least be able to sleep tonight, after the drinking?

girlonfire

cloud493 wrote: »

I just feel absolutely dreadful at the moment but I hate going to the doctor and asking for more anti depressants.

I totally understand not wanting to go in asking but you have to do what's best for you at the moment. Taking things through with your gp might be helpful too. It's really **** when you're so low. I'm there myself at the moment, but I'd urge you to reach out - to someone you trust.
Hope it lifts a bit soon,x

girlonfire

stupidusername wrote: »

will you at least be able to sleep tonight, after the drinking?

I hope so. Even just a few hours would be great.
How are you feeling today? Do you think you'll be okay until Thursday? I suppose it's probably best to take it on a day to day basis.

cloud493

girlonfire wrote: »

I totally understand not wanting to go in asking but you have to do what's best for you at the moment. Taking things through with your gp might be helpful too. It's really **** when you're so low. I'm there myself at the moment, but I'd urge you to reach out - to someone you trust.
Hope it lifts a bit soon,x

Thanks I'l try at least

stupidusername

The drink might help but it may not be good sleep.here's hoping it is.

I'm doin ok today thanks. My life has become about each day as it comes unfortunately.right now thursday seems like a lifetime away,in between i'll be up and down so many times.but I feel generally better than I was before Christmas. I think the extra bad mood may have been part of the side effect of upping my dose. I've a feeling though that i'll get nowhere in terms of a decision about my meds with the psych. But I may at least be put further up the list for talk therapy. We'll just have to see

girlonfire

I think taking each day(each hour) as it comes is the only way to get through the tough periods. It's ridiculous how long you have to wait for talk therapy but hopefully the psych will help move that along a bit.

cloud493

10 months without self harm... Just trying to cling to that.

Seren_

cloud493 wrote: »

10 months without self harm... Just trying to cling to that.

That's brilliant, well done x

It's ridiculous how long people have to wait to see a counsellor/psychologist etc through the HSE. I was really lucky in that I was at college when I got sick first, so I could access all of those services quickly enough (there still is a huge waiting list, but you usually get seen within a few weeks the first time) and for free It's very unfair, everyone should have the same opportunity.

Kaching

girlonfire wrote: »

I think taking each day(each hour) as it comes is the only way to get through the tough periods. It's ridiculous how long you have to wait for talk therapy but hopefully the psych will help move that along a bit.

least your psych cares enough about you to try move it along mine says 6-9 months waiting list . Deal with it

Temaz

I feel bad about feeling good in this thread:P

Being serious though, I was in hell a few months back both depression and anxiety wise. I was at rock bottom and thought life was not worth living.

Now a few months on with the right meds I am back on form.

So, everyone who feels like they are in hell now and see no way out, hold on!!

I am living evidence that things do get better!!

DeVore

Yeah, I'm in a great place at the moment. I've been kinda unwilling to share that because I dont want it to come across as "weeee, I'm doing great everything is wonderful in *my* life..." but then I also thought "jesus if we only ever post when we are down, thats not exactly something to bring anyone some hope, is it".

Since starting that thread on AH I've been working hard internally and seem to have made some serious progress in a few areas. Getting a big, completely out of the blue, hug from my dad at Xmas was a big boost too. You should have seen him scurry out of the room immediately so he didnt have to deal with the emotional element face to face but I know that took a lot for him and left me knocked out!

I'm spinning up and heading to the surface and its good. I broke out of the rut, kicked the hobgoblin[1] in the balls and I'm moving in the right direction.

I hope you can all read this the way I want you to. This is whats in store for you if you want it and work for it cos its not easy but you know what, its not as hard as the Hobgoblin would like you to think.

DeV
[1]The hobgoblin is what I thought of my depression when I was a lad, I didnt know what it was but I also worked out it wasnt part of *me*. I imagine it as a nasty little fecker whispering in my ear and running me down. He doesnt want you to get treatment cos it kills him so of course he's going to tell you its not worth it. Kick him in the balls.

thrilledskinny

I'd like to add to the feeling good stories.... there is hope ;-)

Have been feeling really good lately....

even having had to come down my meds really quickly due to medical reasons.....

am so thrilled not to have sunk back into a black hole....

dont feel like going to bed all the time either yipee ;-)

only one hurdle and thats work ;-(

and an inability to wake up or get up early !!!

Seren_

Well to counterbalance all the happy posts (good job guys, hope I can be there someday too), I feel like absolute sh1t today.

Princess Peach

I had a pretty great year in 2011 mood wise. No long spells of feeling down

Starting back in college now so counseling is free again! I still have issues I need to sort out and that are affecting my life but just couldn't afford the €50 I was paying per hour for my great counselor last year.

So gonna take every advantage of it this year while I'm studying!