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Not Animally - The Off Topic Thread
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23-01-2009 5:24pm#1
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Paper stickies - like the post-its? they remind me of work
I know it's a non animally thread, but I wanted to post these and there's nowhere really suitable in the forum. I just got them today and both brought a tear to my eye (altough admittedly it's very easy to make me cry!)A man and his dog were walking along a road. The
man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was
dead.
He remembered dying, and that the dog
walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them.
After a while, they came to a high, white stone
wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of
a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight.
When he was standing before it he saw a
magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the
street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked
toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side.
When he was close enough, he called out, 'Excuse
me, where are we?'
'This is Heaven, sir,' the man answered.
'Wow! Would you happen to have some water?' the
man asked.
'Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some
ice water brought right up.'
The man gestured, and the gate began to open.
'Can my friend,' gesturing toward his dog,
'come in, too?' the traveller asked.
'I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets.'
The man thought a moment and then turned back
toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog.
After another long walk, and at the top of
another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that
looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence.
As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside,
leaning against a tree and reading a book.
'Excuse me!' he called to the man. 'Do you have
any water?'
'Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on
in.'
'How about my friend here?' the traveller gestured
to the dog.
'There should be a bowl by the pump.'
They went through the gate, and sure enough, there
was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it.
The traveller filled the water bowl and took a
long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog.
When they were full, he and the dog
walked back toward the man who was standing by the
tree.
'What do you call this place?' the traveller
asked.
'This is Heaven,' he answered.
'Well, that's confusing,' the traveller said.
'The man down the road said that was Heaven, too.'
'Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and
pearly gates? Nope. That's hell.'
'Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name
like that?'
'No, we're just happy that they screen out the
folks who would leave their best friends behind.'
And the other one - I got this from someone who used to post here a lot.
Pets Ten Commandments1. My life is likely to last 10-15 years. Any separation from you is likely to be painful.
2. Give me time to understand what you want of me.
3. Place your trust in me. It is crucial for my well-being.
4. Don't be angry with me for long and don't lock me up as punishment. You have your work, your friends, your entertainment, but I have only you.
5. Talk to me. Even if I don't understand your words, I do understand your voice when speaking to me.
6. Be aware that however you treat me, I will never forget it.
7. Before you hit me, before you strike me, remember that I could hurt you, and yet, I choose not to bite you.
8. Before you scold me for being lazy or uncooperative, ask yourself if something might be bothering me. Perhaps I'm not getting the right food, I have been in the sun too long, or my heart might be getting old or weak.
9. Please take care of me when I grow old. You too, will grow old.
10. On the ultimate difficult journey, go with me please. Never say you can't bear to watch. Don't make me face this alone. Everything is easier for me if you are there, because I love you so.0 -
Cold weather means warm hugsWeathers crap--but I want snow!!!!!!!!
We have a new rep starting with us on monday who lost his job, he was in the motor trade too. Apparently it's down 75% on last year. Fingers crossed you manage to hang in there.Job--Im in the motor trade--Shhhhhhh!!!
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It was touch and go for me for a few weeks there, but we won a project only yesterday that will keep me in work over the summer at least. Until we got the call confirming the job I was just waiting to be given my notice.0 -
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Join Date:Posts: 10286
helena.ryan wrote: »Cold weather means warm hugs
I think I forget what a hug is(never mind anything else
Baby hasnt slept in 12 weeks or more--Were both living like zombies!!0 -
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Join Date:Posts: 10286
helena.ryan wrote: »You have my sympathies, the pup woke me at 6am and I've been wrecked all day
Oh 6 am would be heaven.Its usually between 2 and 3.0 -
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Right, I'm going to answer these in an attempt to be a bit serious and introduce myself to everyone.
Whats your favourite flavour ice-cream?
Ben and Jerry's Karamel Sutra
Hasn't the weather been terrible?
Wicked. It's depressing at this stage.
Can you believe its nearly the end of January?
Feels like it should be the end of March the way it's dragging.
Do you still have a job?
Just about
Aren't the Obama girls awful cute?
Yes. But I'm a terrible cynic so when Barack and Michelle were dancing the other night, all I could think was "wow, great PR machine"
Do you find coffee makes you thirsty?
No. I find it very filling. I think that's because I like my coffee milky and sweet.
I like paper stickies, do you like paper stickies?
Not really. I think they encourage waste of paper because nobody ever takes up all of the page or writes on the back.
Have you ever found a key that didn't belong to you but you discovered opened something you owned?
Nope
Daddy or chips?
Daddy. He's the best
Can I ad another few?
Yes, go ahead.
What hobbies do you have besides your pets?
I read a lot and love the interwebs
What music do you like?
80s and Johnny Cash
How important is it for you that your partner, or potential partners love animals too?
Very. My husband likes animals- could trust someone who didn't.
What is the most amazing experience you ever had?
Don't know. Hope I haven't reached it already.
What are you most proud of?
My relationship with my family. Feeling ashamed of my insipidness at the moment, though!0 -
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OK, had a good sleep and its a lovely sunny morning so I can now reveal my answers...:D
Ice-cream: Cookies & Cream, or Baileys, or Vanilla & Fudge or... (actually if its ice-cream its all good! I've discovered its actually impossible to be unhappy if you are eating ice-cream.)
Weather: Well, I've had a few nice walks in the crispy, cold sunshine, so its just about tolerable.
Believing its end of January: Scary!
Job: Yes, phew!
Cuteness: very! Aw! But their Daddy is awful cute too!
Coffee: It makes me thirsty, hyper and hungry - but I LOVE it! And it has to be real coffee - none of this instant nonsense.
Paper stickies: Yes, post-its. Why did I call them paper stickies? The best thing is to get the multicoloured pack and make nice patterns on your desk.:P And then you look really busy and important too.
Keys: No. But I keep collecting found keys just in case one day one of them unlocks something amazing.
Daddy or chips: Um, chips. Sorry, Da.
Hobbies: Writing stories I never finish, volunteering, walking, going out for coffee, baking cakes & bread.
Music: Mixed taste - have the ipod on shuffle all the time.
Animal loving partner: Essential. Although one of my friends has told me there is no way I'll ever find a man now that I have cats. Single woman with cats = run, run away as fast as you can!:rolleyes:
Amazing experience: Once I was on holiday in Fiji, and met up with some marine biologists and one day they came running past me shouting "Come on! Quick!". So I jumped into their boat with them and we caught up with a pod of pilot wales they were observing and we went swimming with them!!!
Coming eye-to-eye with a baby whale is unforgettable!
Proud of: I can't think of something in particular. Oh - starting the off-topic animally thread. 0 -
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I wish puppies and kittens would stay puppies and kittens for longer than they do!
Well, last night I was watching The Dark Knight - so violent! :rolleyes: And I DID NOT like the way Batman was beating up those poor Rotties!
I am immediately turned off any book or film that has any kind of cruelty or unkindness to animals! Except Wonderboys! I love that film even if they did shoot the dog!
I'm not sure why Batman was talking like he had just eating a bowlful of crushed glass though.
Anyway - any recommendations for what should be next on my DVD list? I'm not really into action movies, but anything else is OK!0 -
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We've been living in our house for 2 years and every time we get a film, we both realise that we have not watched one good one since we moved in!
Over the weekend though we watched pineapple express. It's just an amazingly stupid film but had us laughing the whole way through! Just don't watch it if you want anything serious or lovey dovey!
Oh I enjoyed Garfield too
or any of the shrek films. 0 -
We watched Hot Fuzz over the weekend. Would definitely recommend it- though it was nothing like I thought it would be.
After reading so much about the Korean horror A Tale Of Two Sisters on here and IMDB, I bought it on Amazon and watched it last weekend. Hated it. Was so disappointed. Not scary at all. 0 -
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No it wasn't expected, I was given 2 weeks notice but he just let me go there and then, which was nice. Just not enough work out there at the minute. It's ok, I've a few bits and pieces to keep me going hopefully.
George is going nowhere as he costs nothing to keep. Hopefully I'll be able to hold onto the fish, they do cost a bomb though. 0 -
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Morning peeps, Loving the thread...
Hi Rory so sorry to hear about the job loss. Fingers x'd and everything else that something comes up for you soon.
Hellrazer am in the motor trade too, was touch and go there for the first week or so as to whether id still have a job but its tipping over slowly but surely so hopefully i can hold on until March (going on Maternity Leave)...
Months are dragging in aaarrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh 0 -
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I'm feeling very sorry for myself I had minor surgery yesterday. So I'm a bit sore. Then when i got up this morning the pup had dragged half the garden into my kitchen. Then he spent the day looking fo attention. Not his fault, but I just didn't have the energy!
Now I was just informed that my OH will not be back until very late tonight, so I have to try muster up the energy to bring him for a walk. I could cry. 0 -
Poor you!
Well, I'm worrying because my friends cat I'm minding has not come home for the last 2 nights! :eek: He is a "free range" cat so I didn't want to constrain him once I started looking after him, but I'm sorry now! I hope he comes home tonight or I'll have to start with the posters etc. (Sorry that was a bit animally, but its not worth starting a thread about!)0 -
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Yea - I'm at his house - but this is a long term thing. I've been there months now, and he has stayed out for a night once or twice before. All the neighbours adore him though because he is big and fluffy, so it could be he has just gone visiting. I'll knock on a few doors tonight if he isn't home for his tea. Hopefully, it'll be fine.
Hopefully, you'll be fine too! Could you let your puppy have a run around a garden or something instead if you aren't feeling too well? I'm sure one skipped walk won't be a problem for him! 0 -
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Just a rant....
Hey all, well im over 7 mnths pregnant, feeling very fat and heavy in that region, brought my dog for a walk yesterday and I honestly cant do it anymore, was doubled over with cramps. He is only 7 months aswell and full of beans. Also another problem of mine is he does be out the back till i get home (3pm or so) and my gawd he does be filthy, Ive never cleaned and scrubbed my floors so much since i moved in, am doing the "grab him before he gets in and wipe his paws" but its trying.
I feel for ya helena, at least im still fairly mobile but it can get very frustrating for you and your lil fella.
My partner doesnt get home till after 7pm or so every night so am stuck doing this till then every day. I do be drained. Rant over just needed to get that off my chest, he is a loveable lil fecker otherwise............ 0 -
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LOL - isn't is funny how our off-topic thread has become very on-topic! Will we be infracted?
I was thinking the same myself
Most conversations I have these days revolve around the pup anyway. I work from home so, some days, the only person I'll see is my husband and it's a case of "what havoc has she caused today?"
Has anyone any weekend plans?0 -
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Well considering I look like the bride of frankinstien ATM I can't leave the house.Has anyone any weekend plans? My OH is playing a gig in town tonight and I would so love to be there and am pretty peed off that I can't.
Then tomorrow there's some sort of UFC thing on and he was heading off to watch it in a friends house. I had a friend coming to keep me company (read: give me sympathy) but something came up and now she can't so I ended up buying setanta sports so he could watch it here, rather than me spend another evening alone. And somehow I ended up roping myself into cooking a shepards pie for a few fellas who are coming over.
No idea how that happened. And the worse thing is, my painkillers make me a bit nauseous and I've said I'll make it with real meat.
And poor puppy hasn't had a walk yesterday or today and he's being so good despite the energy he must have and I feel so guilty.
/end rant - everything always seems worse when you feel sick.0 -
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Been thinking of him. Any updates?
Aw - thanks so much for caring! But its bad news - still no sign of him anywhere. I've done everything I can think of but not a peep!
One neighbour told me something v. worrying - she said another neighbour was annoyed by cats walking on his wall, and he threatened to "get rid" of any he could get his hands on. She said he'd do it too. I know its only hearsay so I'm really hoping whatever happened, it wasn't this.
I just wish she had told me before! If I'd known he felt that way I would have done something to keep Alfie away from him. But who knows?
Maybe Alfie has found a nicer home where he is being handfed prawns by the bucketload and having his belly rubbed at hourly intervals!:D0 -
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