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Wanker watch: Warning signs that someone is a tosser

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Comments

  • #2432
    Tom_Barry
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 117 ✭✭Tom_Barry


    People that just wait until you finish speaking so that they can immediately delve into their story, without even acknowledging yours!

    Anyone that wears crocs, doesnt matter if you're a child or an OAP , if you wear crocs you're a w*nker, simple as!

    Anyone that refers to Heineken as 'Ken'


  • #2433
    Figbiscuithead
    Closed Accounts Posts: 307 ✭✭Figbiscuithead


    dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »
    Can't beat a good rant! :D
    It's just the attitude of some people, "Oh he doesn't wear a suit, he can't be much good". Yeah, Bertie only ever wore the finest of suits and anyone remember Uncle Charlie and his Charvet shirts?
    By the logic of no suit=unprofessional and suit=automatically professional, trustworthy, intelligent and qualified, Berty and Charlie were the best things to ever happen to the country. Most expensive suit=best for Ireland.
    Although a lot of lefty loonies, who wear demonstrably casual clothes would proably turn this country into a basket case that the Greek would feel sorry for, so in the end you can't judge a book by it's cover.

    Ever see a photo of Bert's (I'm calling him "Bert" now to make him even more ridiculous than he is) canary yellow suit?


  • #2434
    NufcNavan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,845 ✭✭✭NufcNavan


    Tom_Barry wrote: »

    Anyone that refers to Heineken as 'Ken'

    I thankfully have never heard of it being called that.


  • #2435
    Beastermc
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 182 ✭✭Beastermc


    NufcNavan wrote:
    I thankfully have never heard of it being called that.


    Oh I have, only a couple times. Both in Dublin. "One or two more Kens here and then we'll head in to town." Christ above.


  • #2436
    Yer Aul One
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 664 ✭✭✭Yer Aul One


    Beastermc wrote: »
    Oh I have, only a couple times. Both in Dublin. "One or two more Kens here and then we'll head in to town." Christ above.

    I have heard it being used but always ironically, think it was a joke to call it that from those Ross O'Carroll Kelly books


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  • #2437
    Beastermc
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 182 ✭✭Beastermc


    Yer Aul One wrote:
    I have heard it being used but always ironically, think it was a joke to call it that from those Ross O'Carroll Kelly books


    Well that's what I was thinking at first, (surely these guys are taking the Mick) but it was used multiple times, with straight faces. It was as if these fellas were ripped from the pages of the Ross o Carroll Kelly books.


  • #2438
    Salvation Tambourine
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 955 ✭✭✭Salvation Tambourine


    Beastermc wrote: »
    Well that's what I was thinking at first, (surely these guys are taking the Mick) but it was used multiple times, with straight faces. It was as if these fellas were ripped from the pages of the Ross o Carroll Kelly books.

    "Vitamin H" is another one used as a joke.


  • #2439
    dr.fuzzenstein
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,620 ✭✭✭✭dr.fuzzenstein


    Figbiscuithead wrote: »
    Ever see a photo of Bert's (I'm calling him "Bert" now to make him even more ridiculous than he is) canary yellow suit?

    Oh yes, I have. He probably had to dress himself on that day. :D He looked like Bananas in Pyjamas.


  • #2440
    dr.fuzzenstein
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,620 ✭✭✭✭dr.fuzzenstein


    Tom_Barry wrote: »
    People that just wait until you finish speaking so that they can immediately delve into their story, without even acknowledging yours!

    Anyone that wears crocs, doesnt matter if you're a child or an OAP , if you wear crocs you're a w*nker, simple as!

    Anyone that refers to Heineken as 'beer'

    FYP. We only have it because the Dutch don't want it.


  • #2441
    Aglomerado
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,789 ✭✭✭Aglomerado


    dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »
    FYP. We only have it because the Dutch don't want it.

    Chemicalbrau. Rotten stuff! I have a friend who turns into an asshole on the stuff. We call him "Captain Heineken" :pac:


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  • #2442
    Riverireland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 833 ✭✭✭Riverireland


    droidman123 wrote: »
    I don't know if this has been mentioned yet,but when people reply to a question putting "so" in front of their reply.its been creeping in slowly but surely with Irish people lately.cringeworthy and wankerology at its highest

    People who say, no yeah when replying to a question. Still a few around.


  • #2443
    Kev W
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,536 ✭✭✭Kev W


    People who think being disagreed with is the same thing as being censored.


  • #2444
    ChippingSodbury
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,371 ✭✭✭ChippingSodbury


    PearlJ wrote: »
    Speaking to a friend of my husband's once, who I suspected was a wanker.

    Me; 'So you're a vegetarian?
    Her; 'Oh God yeah, although I do eat veal because my favourite restaurant serves the most AMAAAZZZING veal dish'

    ...............Wanker

    So what's the proper term for a girl wanker? Surely can't be just a wanker?


  • #2445
    JustShon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭JustShon


    Kev W wrote: »
    People who think being disagreed with is the same thing as being censored.

    But you're oppressing them and removing their right to free speech!


  • #2446
    Kev W
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,536 ✭✭✭Kev W


    ChippingSodbury wrote: »
    So what's the proper term for a girl wanker? Surely can't be just a wanker?

    Why not?


  • #2447
    EagererBeaver
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,760 ✭✭✭EagererBeaver


    ChippingSodbury wrote: »
    So what's the proper term for a girl wanker? Surely can't be just a wanker?

    At the risk of being extremely crude, a fingerer? Or a bean flicker?


  • #2448
    OldNotWIse
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,468 ✭✭✭✭OldNotWIse


    People who think something that is unfavourable to them is automatically discrimination. It's not! You have to fit into one of a number of discrete groups in order to make this claim and just because you don't like a decision does not mean you've been discriminated against!


  • #2449
    con___manx1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,659 ✭✭✭con___manx1


    People who take stuff to test out with a view to buy and then have to be chased down for money.


  • #2450
    JustShon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭JustShon


    OldNotWIse wrote: »
    People who think something that is unfavourable to them is automatically discrimination. It's not! You have to fit into one of a number of discrete groups in order to make this claim and just because you don't like a decision does not mean you've been discriminated against!

    God yes. See this all the time in the work problems forum. "My boss is mean to me, it's discrimination!" Not unless your boss is being mean to you on the basis of your skin colour, religion, gender identity, nationality, religion or membership of the traveling community it's not!


  • #2451
    The_fever
    Closed Accounts Posts: 139 ✭✭The_fever


    If they wear a helly Hanson jacket , that is a sure sign


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  • #2452
    Kev W
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,536 ✭✭✭Kev W


    The_fever wrote: »
    If they wear a helly Hanson jacket , that is a sure sign

    I had to Google that, it just looks like a jacket. Not my style, but nothing special. What am I missing?


  • #2453
    sebcity
    Closed Accounts Posts: 546 ✭✭✭sebcity


    con___manx1 wrote: »
    People who take stuff to test out with a view to buy and then have to be chased down for money.
    JustShon wrote: »
    God yes. See this all the time in the work problems forum. "My boss is mean to me, it's discrimination!" Not unless your boss is being mean to you on the basis of your skin colour, religion, gender identity, nationality, religion or membership of the traveling community it's not!

    It implies they sail?!


  • #2454
    CptMackey
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,791 ✭✭✭CptMackey


    kfallon wrote: »
    Jaysus, you really hate suits, don't you??? :pac:

    I hate the bloody things. Have to wear them to work and look professional. Yuck. Straight into t shirt n combats/jeans/shorts etc once I'm in the door. People I work with think people with tattoos are dicks or gangsters or that they will regret it. Lol


  • #2455
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    The_fever wrote: »
    If they wear a helly Hanson jacket , that is a sure sign

    If someone wears what's considered to be a regular jacket then they're a wanker?


  • #2456
    kfallon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,775 ✭✭✭✭kfallon


    CptMackey wrote: »
    I hate the bloody things. Have to wear them to work and look professional. Yuck. Straight into t shirt n combats/jeans/shorts etc once I'm in the door. People I work with think people with tattoos are dicks or gangsters or that they will regret it. Lol

    I have to look professional too in work, shirt and pants. Never, ever wear a full suit cos I hate them.

    Often I find that people like to mask their stupidity by wearing the full suit to work. Makes them look 'good' but in reality they spend 8 hours at their desk praying nobody will ask them anything cos they have the brains of a retarded budgie!


  • #2457
    kfallon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,775 ✭✭✭✭kfallon


    smash wrote: »
    If someone wears what's considered to be a regular jacket then they're a wanker?

    To be fair the blue HH jackets have now become part of the grey trackie ends, white socks and hand down the jocks gang!


  • #2458
    JustShon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭JustShon


    sebcity wrote: »
    It implies they sail?!

    I have no idea what you're on about.


  • #2459
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    kfallon wrote: »
    To be fair the blue HH jackets have now become part of the grey trackie ends, white socks and hand down the jocks gang!

    Can't say I've seen this myself. The type you describe are more so the type of people who shop in superdry or Jack & Jones.


  • #2460
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,396 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    EagererBeaver wrote: »
    At the risk of being extremely crude, a fingerer? Or a bean flicker?

    "Gusset typist"


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  • #2461
    kfallon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,775 ✭✭✭✭kfallon


    smash wrote: »
    Can't say I've seen this myself. The type you describe are more so the type of people who shop in superdry or Jack & Jones.

    Helly Hanson, SuperDry, North Face....as long as it's a blue raincoat with a hood then you are in business.....the skanger business!


This discussion has been closed.
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