Cheapskategate aka How Not To Host Your Wedding

Aineoil · 03-08-2014 9:03pm

Paddy Cow wrote: »

I
I feel sorry for the family. It had been speculated that maybe the apple didn't fall far from the tree but given the reaction of her family, this is not the case. It sounds like they only got wind of the deception at the last minute and were mortified/outraged. Someone said that family should stand by you no matter what and I think that was what the bride was banking on. To be honest, that is a crock. The whole point of family is that you respect them and can rely on them but don't take them for granted. If you take the p!ss, you only have yourself to blame if they flush you down the toilet.

I agree with you. If something is wrong it's just wrong. You can't expect your family to stand behind something that is just plainly wrong.

Pinkycharm · 03-08-2014 9:11pm

My weekend is now complete. Before I started teaching I used work with a wedding planner- oh my god if she ever saw this thread she would freak. Its crazy.

she could have had a lovely cheap wedding with her family included but just having karaoke and cake just sounds so wrong.

WDIC you are a saint for what you put up with and I think I can 100% say if you are EVER asked to be a bridesmaid again, it will be 1000 times better than what you have experienced.

You definitely need a night away to celebrate that being over and I would definitely have thrown the dress, the hair clip, the shoes and the bride in to the rubbish.

People will always get what they deserve---who knows---the marriage might not last that long, she might get a round 2

oblivious · 03-08-2014 9:12pm

Thank you for the update, I bet there was and is some phone calls going around today

Aineoil · 03-08-2014 9:14pm

Paddy Cow wrote: »

The bride and groom will have to live with the fallout of this wedding for many years to come and I have absolutely no sympathy for them. I get the feeling from their behaviour in the lead up to and during the wedding that they don't feel like they have done anything wrong. I feel sorry for any kids they have who will be born into their family mess

I had had the same thoughts. It's not the best way to start married life......alienating your family and "friends".

I wonder about the groom too? Did he just not care or was he complicite?

salmocab · 03-08-2014 9:17pm

WDIC thank you. You miss are my hero. Ring Hollywood there is a movie in this.

martinn123 · 03-08-2014 9:18pm

My first post here, but I have been following since the start.

This was not a wedding, it was a shake down.

Invite 200 people to a reception, with zero outlay, and collect the envelopes.

I have to admire the OP for sticking with it so long, especially after being abandoned in the Car Park, I would have bailed out a week ago.

So 200 people were invited to " donate " looks like only 80 took the bait.

The Bridezillas Family recognised the scam, and pulled out.

Expect to see the B&G on a Ryanair Flight tomorrow, opening the envelopes.

Deserves, to go viral, via Facebook, Twitter, etc,

Someone will post a name, by tomorrow. ( not. On Boards ) but elsewhere.

rainbowtrout · 03-08-2014 9:21pm

salmocab wrote: »

WDIC thank you. You miss are my hero. Ring Hollywood there is a movie in this.

It needs a Hollywood ending. This was more Apocalypse Now.

Having said that, it was a very successful movie.

xzanti · 03-08-2014 9:28pm

Feel like I just found out who shot JR

That was quite a ride

Dodd · 03-08-2014 9:34pm

martinn123 wrote: »

My first post here, but I have been following since the start.

This was not a wedding, it was a shake down.

Invite 200 people to a reception, with zero outlay, and collect the envelopes.

I have to admire the OP for sticking with it so long, especially after being abandoned in the Car Park, I would have bailed out a week ago.

So 200 people were invited to " donate " looks like only 80 took the bait.

The Bridezillas Family recognised the scam, and pulled out.

Expect to see the B&G on a Ryanair Flight tomorrow, opening the envelopes.

Deserves, to go viral, via Facebook, Twitter, etc,

Someone will post a name, by tomorrow. ( not. On Boards ) but elsewhere.

They opened the envelopes at the dinner in front of guests.:(

Aineoil · 03-08-2014 9:35pm

In fairness I want to thank Wdic for this post. It's not easy being a bridesmaid. I have 4 sisters.

Slutmonkey57b · 03-08-2014 9:37pm

What a horrendous couple of shysters!

The bride's family bailed out when they found out what was going on... did the groom's? If not, and given the OP didn't think her friend was like this, it seems the groom is possibly the source of this thieving cheapskate behaviour?

What a horrible day.

Arbiter of Good Taste · 03-08-2014 9:39pm

Thanks for the update WDIC and thanks to Toots for reopening the thread.

A lot of posters have already said what I want to, so I won't repeat. Just want to add that the bride and groom sound like borderline sociopaths.

frag420 · 03-08-2014 9:39pm

Just had to check i didn't accidentally click into the TV forum and was reading a synopsis of this weeks Eastenders!!:D

fineso.mom · 03-08-2014 9:41pm

The one saving grace of the day ....there were cupcakes!

FreshKnickers · 03-08-2014 9:43pm

I would like to add my thanks to whatdoicare for being good enough to come back to let us all know the outcome and Toots* for overseeing the madness from Day 1.

Shocking altogether. Leaving your bridesmaids and groomsmen, people who have given up their time and money to support you, stranded in a field while the two of you swan off in a car is indefensible!

Opening envelopes, taking money out and buying themselves more drink? While everyone else has paid for their own meals?! I'm imagining she didn't even bother reading the cards, just slit the envelopes and tipped 'em sideways.

And they had a band, so they can afford to hire a band but not afford dinner for, how many was it in the end? 8/10 people? And even a couple of platters of bar food?

All that's left is to hope the bride and groom are very happy together because they just might find themselves with only each other to look at for a long time.

rainbowtrout · 03-08-2014 9:43pm

Slutmonkey57b wrote: »

What a horrendous couple of shysters!

The bride's family bailed out when they found out what was going on... did the groom's? If not, and given the OP didn't think her friend was like this, it seems the groom is possibly the source of this thieving cheapskate behaviour?

What a horrible day.

WDIC said the groom stayed with his brother the night before the wedding so presumably he went.

I also think on the original thread she said the other bridesmaid was the groom' sister in law, I'm guessing this guys wife, she was the one that 'forgot' her purse at the hen.

No other family were mentioned. There were only 8 at the civil ceremony so it's not likely much of his family were there either.

There's definitely a pair of them in it.

athtrasna · 03-08-2014 9:46pm

I take it that's the last time you saw/see the Bride WDIC. She took taking the proverbial to an unimaginable level.

I had a friend, nowhere near as bad as that but someone who was always taking. I was trying to explain what she's like to someone and they described the people in our lives as drains and radiators. We need to lose the drains and keep the radiators close.

Well done you for not telling her what you think of her, doubt I could be so dignified. If I knew you I'd buy you a very large drink. You more than deserve it!

Flippyfloppy · 03-08-2014 9:48pm

rainbowtrout wrote: »

WDIC said the groom stayed with his brother the night before the wedding so presumably he went.

I also think on the original thread she said the other bridesmaid was the groom' sister in law, I'm guessing this guys wife, she was the one that 'forgot' her purse at the hen.

No other family were mentioned. There were only 8 at the civil ceremony so it's not likely much of his family were there either.

There's definitely a pair of them in it.

Of course there's a pair of them in it!

Who here just makes huge decisions like this without their OH?!

martinn123 · 03-08-2014 9:51pm

frag420 wrote: »

Just had to check i didn't accidentally click into the TV forum and was reading a synopsis of this weeks Eastenders!!:D

fineso.mom wrote:

The one saving grace of the day ....

......is that I just sold the screenplay to Eastenders.....yippee...

CaraMay · 03-08-2014 9:53pm

I think it's all very sad really. The bride and groom seem well matched though and don't appear to care about anyone else.

Stheno · 03-08-2014 9:54pm

I actually think it's a very sad outcome.

The bride had little or no family with her on the day, I remember when I got married, how much I cherished my Dad walking me in that day, and how chuffed he was, he got very emotional.

That's just one aspect, but on the whole it sounds like a thoroughly miserable day, abandoned by ones family due to utter stupidity.

03-08-2014 9:54pm

I'd be tempted to put the hairclip in an envelope, knock on her door, hand it to her and tell her never to treat me like that again, and that she'd let herself and her whole family down with her shabby behaviour.

It is the opposite of the sort of graceful, generous and warm celebration that a wedding should be.

Tigger99 · 03-08-2014 9:56pm

Am I the only one who's boyfriend was very curious as to why I was obsessed by the weddings forum and this story :pac:

I spent the weekend hoping that there would be an update, think he was getting curious himself!

CaraMay · 03-08-2014 9:58pm

Candie wrote: »

I'd be tempted to put the hairclip in an envelope, knock on her door, hand it to her and tell her never to treat me like that again, and that she'd let herself and her whole family down with her shabby behaviour.

It is the opposite of the sort of graceful, generous and warm celebration that a wedding should be.

I have to agree - they /she should be told how upsetting and vile their behaviour was both towards family and guests.

Fred Swanson · 03-08-2014 10:00pm

This post has been deleted.

03-08-2014 10:01pm

CaraMay wrote: »

I have to agree - they /she should be told how upsetting and vile their behaviour was both towards family and guests.

I genuinely understand her family refusing to be bullied by convention into going along with what amounts to a con. She wanted maximum financial return with as little outlay as possible, regardless of who grasping it made her look or who was out of pocket.

The sheer shamelessness of it all is outrageous.

lazeedaisy · 03-08-2014 10:04pm

Thanks for posting the update.

It seems there are people out there who really think the world owes them, and every time I come across them, I always think it will come back on them, it never does.

Wdic respect for how you reacted, I know your other half must be very proud of you, well done.

As for the couple, if this does go viral, they will be so proud and rake in the money from the movie, and think its great.

Her parents must be feeling rather crap over how their darling daughter tried to pull the wool over their eyes, and what should have been a celebration has now turned into a family saga.

It's unfair to say apples never fall far from trees, or that families should stick together. Some people just are like that.

As for the couple, they got married, lost what friends they had and now have to try to build the rift between her parents anyway. Not an envious position to be in, but it's down to their own actions not anyone else.

They sound well suited, I can only hope that for them, the marriage works out and if there are kids at a later date, the grandparents will be there,

spygirl · 03-08-2014 10:06pm

I feel so sorry for her family and friends. As well as being outraged by the behavior they must have been mortified. Terribly sad all round. Really not sure what I expected the ending to be to this story. WDIC...you went above and beyond and thank you for posting the update.

Fred Swanson · 03-08-2014 10:06pm

This post has been deleted.

FouxDaFaFa · 03-08-2014 10:10pm

The first few sentences of your update, I was tempted to feel sorry for them but it just kept getting worse and worse.

You have the patience of a saint, WDIC. Actually no, you have class and tact. Which is something the Bride and Groom lack.

They sound quite childish, are they very young? The opening of the cards at the table is like something at a kid's birthday party.

As bad as there not being food at the reception was, I think the worst thing was stranding you and the other bridesmaid after the photos. It would be bad enough if they were like "make your own way" but to not even tell you and just let you stand there, waiting? It's rare you hear of people being so self-involved.

You are well rid of them, WDIC and I'm only sorry you had to waste this much time and money on them.

Cheapskategate aka How Not To Host Your Wedding

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