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Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

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Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    Hersheys wrote: »
    With the deadlines I have looming I shouldn't be on boards!!!

    Yet here we are! lol


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 175 ✭✭tosspot15


    been spending my time feeling extremely agitated and yelling at people randomly on internet boards and skype. Yep, sure is interesting.

    Also, declined a "review" appointment when my psychiatrist called me. They werent too interested in talking to me the first time and basically made a fool of me, so I dont see the point in going back. At least I have that therapy with the nurse to see.

    also CIPC never called me back, despite me leaving my name with them over a month ago. So much for a 2 week wait lol.

    whatever.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    tosspot15 wrote: »
    also CIPC never called me back, despite me leaving my name with them over a month ago. So much for a 2 week wait lol.

    whatever.

    Might be good to keep on hounding them over it. They'll have to give in eventually.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    murria wrote: »
    Call Me Jimmy

    It is just that though, a low, probably brought on by staying up all night, being sleep deprived, not going out, not connecting with others. That person in the mirror is not all that you are, that person is only a reflection of your thoughts.

    You are so kind and inspiring to all of us on here, we all care a great deal about you and want you to get well.

    Be kinder to yourself Jimmy you deserve to feel good.

    With love. xx

    +1

    CMJ,

    You are one of the kindest people on Boards, yet when it is time to be kind to yourself ? No. Please for the next week throw away that baseball bat and be kind to yourself. C'mon Man try it, one day at a time.:)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    On top of everything else I'm torturing myself here looking up people I used to hang with on Facebook and seeing their wonderful lives.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    On top of everything else I'm torturing myself here looking up people I used to hang with on Facebook and seeing their wonderful lives.

    Hugo,

    What are you doing ?

    Looking at the lives of other people on Facebook.

    They may be highlighting various events in their lives with photos etc etc.

    Honestly I don't think they are going to highlight the miserable moments in their lives too.

    Everyone has something which has caused tears, the loss of a loved one, a failed relationship, loss of a job, business failure.............the list goes on .

    So what you are looking at is the odd happy snapshot of people you know, however you don't know what is really going on in their lives at each photo session!

    Please you need to put yourself first, concentrate on your health in order that you may get your life back on track.

    Please, please take very good care of yourself, you are very important, comparing yourself with someone's Facebook page is not being fair to yourself.

    You are a very intelligent person, why are you torturing yourself? Stop it please.

    Live in the Now! Be kind to yourself.

    Best wishes:)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,891 ✭✭✭✭Hugo Stiglitz


    Thanks for the kind words Del!

    It's something I do every now and then. It's just for some people you can see them all in a crowd now. I used to be part of that and I miss it truth be told. Some people I miss individually worse and they're the ones that really hit me hard.

    Facebook is a curse sometimes! lol


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    Thanks for the kind words Del!

    It's something I do every now and then. It's just for some people you can see them all in a crowd now. I used to be part of that and I miss it truth be told. Some people I miss individually worse and they're the ones that really hit me hard.

    Facebook is a curse sometimes! lol

    No problem Hugo,

    I understand fully, I do the same and then ask myself what in the name oF God am I doing. It is like looking at old photos from school, family albums wedding albums , just another waste of time!!

    We are who we are ,and need to live in the Present !

    Yes Facebook is the curse of the modern generation LOL


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,159 ✭✭✭stinkle


    I agree Facebook is a scourge! But it's totally one-sided in so many ways... people are always going to post good news/pictures of social events but leave out the less impressive stuff.

    I took a bit of extra time off last week after the bank hol and it definitely did some good. Had a change of scenery too which was great. Woke up with mild anxiety today (possibly just Monday blues), I wasn't in a hurry to get to work, and just told myself not to sweat it that I wasn't in mad early (job is flexible and I can stay late if need be today). I've had a bad cold, neck pain all weekend and was awake all night on Saturday unrelated to the ailments. So it was helpful to tell myself that I needed rest and the world wont end if I was a bit late.

    I mentioned I was going to see my therapist in my last post. We discussed my new feelings of "being in the way" and feeling like I've upset people when I really havent. To be honest, it's not a new thing with me really when I look back, but in my current work situation it's new enough. It was great to talk it out. I applied for a heap of jobs at the weekend too. I'm still frustrated that I'm "trapped" here with no idea of where/when I'll get work. Am anxious over the stuff I need to get through over the next week or two, mainly cos I have meetings to attend and I hate being under time pressure, but am telling myself if I'm late, I'm late and to focus on the important stuff that needs to be done. Plenty of other people are late/dont attend group meetings when they've stuff on so it's not a problem really.

    An opportunity has come up to get away for a few days later in the month so hopefully that will happen and is something to focus on and look forward to. I hate wishing my life away but it's the only thing helping with the feelings of being trapped


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    stinkle wrote: »
    I agree Facebook is a scourge! But it's totally one-sided in so many ways... people are always going to post good news/pictures of social events but leave out the less impressive stuff.

    I took a bit of extra time off last week after the bank hol and it definitely did some good. Had a change of scenery too which was great. Woke up with mild anxiety today (possibly just Monday blues), I wasn't in a hurry to get to work, and just told myself not to sweat it that I wasn't in mad early (job is flexible and I can stay late if need be today). I've had a bad cold, neck pain all weekend and was awake all night on Saturday unrelated to the ailments. So it was helpful to tell myself that I needed rest and the world wont end if I was a bit late.

    I mentioned I was going to see my therapist in my last post. We discussed my new feelings of "being in the way" and feeling like I've upset people when I really havent. To be honest, it's not a new thing with me really when I look back, but in my current work situation it's new enough. It was great to talk it out. I applied for a heap of jobs at the weekend too. I'm still frustrated that I'm "trapped" here with no idea of where/when I'll get work. Am anxious over the stuff I need to get through over the next week or two, mainly cos I have meetings to attend and I hate being under time pressure, but am telling myself if I'm late, I'm late and to focus on the important stuff that needs to be done. Plenty of other people are late/dont attend group meetings when they've stuff on so it's not a problem really.

    An opportunity has come up to get away for a few days later in the month so hopefully that will happen and is something to focus on and look forward to. I hate wishing my life away but it's the only thing helping with the feelings of being trapped

    Well done,You are very much in control.

    Take it all in your stride!

    Best wishes:)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,159 ✭✭✭stinkle


    thanks del, it's hard work though and it feels like things might fall apart any minute. even doing small things are a bit of a struggle, it's hard to get motivated sometimes. Really hope I hear SOMETHING regarding the job applications, even to do an interview would be great. It's getting so annoying not getting any kind of response to applications


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    stinkle wrote: »
    thanks del, it's hard work though and it feels like things might fall apart any minute. even doing small things are a bit of a struggle, it's hard to get motivated sometimes. Really hope I hear SOMETHING regarding the job applications, even to do an interview would be great. It's getting so annoying not getting any kind of response to applications

    Yes it would be great to get some interview experience. Have you had any experience of mock interviews? Perhaps your Careers Counsellor at College could assist ?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,159 ✭✭✭stinkle


    Did a skype interview a few months back which was a weird experience!! I never heard back unfortunately, would have been nice to know was the interview awful and how I can improve next time or they just went with someone else. I generally did well in interviews in the past, but it's been a few years since the last successful one and I've got loads of experience and qualifications since then so haven't a clue how ones at this level are...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    stinkle wrote: »
    Did a skype interview a few months back which was a weird experience!! I never heard back unfortunately, would have been nice to know was the interview awful and how I can improve next time or they just went with someone else. I generally did well in interviews in the past, but it's been a few years since the last successful one and I've got loads of experience and qualifications since then so haven't a clue how ones at this level are...

    It may be worthwhile brushing up the interview skills. Sometimes it is hard to know what Employers' are looking for at interview particularly in the current climate. Have you registered with agencies, I am sure they could guide you as to what HR people are looking for at interview. I appreciate you have lots of experience and qualifications, just no harm to hone in on the interview techniques. No doubt the internet may have lots of suggestions.:)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,159 ✭✭✭stinkle


    I completely agree that it's hard to know what they want! I'm applying directly to potential bosses (field is fairly informal in that way) for the most part - there's the odd one that goes thru a central HR address but not usually. Previous interview was just a chat really, it's weird in the sense that you're sitting at home and there can be slight delays via skype and it's just so unnatural really!

    Need to contact a former colleague this week about something else but I'll mention I'm looking for work and if they have any hints for interviews/applications


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    stinkle wrote: »
    I completely agree that it's hard to know what they want! I'm applying directly to potential bosses (field is fairly informal in that way) for the most part - there's the odd one that goes thru a central HR address but not usually. Previous interview was just a chat really, it's weird in the sense that you're sitting at home and there can be slight delays via skype and it's just so unnatural really!

    Need to contact a former colleague this week about something else but I'll mention I'm looking for work and if they have any hints for interviews/applications

    Skype and Facetime are great inventions, but there is nothing quite like having a face to face meeting:)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 650 ✭✭✭handbagmad


    hi all. just thought id say hello x
    I'm still awaiting councelling to start. Was supposed to start a few weeks back but it was cancelled on their part havent heard anything since. Still struggling but fighting through.
    I seem very tired lately and really do not want the company of others. Its such an effort to have a conversation. I really have no place to go to be on my own so I've become very good at zoning out when with others.
    Its very hard as Im sure you know to put on a front all the time.
    Im really hoping councelling happens soon. Really need help with my life.

    Hope everyone is holding up ok.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    handbagmad wrote: »
    hi all. just thought id say hello x
    I'm still awaiting councelling to start. Was supposed to start a few weeks back but it was cancelled on their part havent heard anything since. Still struggling but fighting through.
    I seem very tired lately and really do not want the company of others. Its such an effort to have a conversation. I really have no place to go to be on my own so I've become very good at zoning out when with others.
    Its very hard as Im sure you know to put on a front all the time.
    Im really hoping councelling happens soon. Really need help with my life.

    Hope everyone is holding up ok.

    Hi there,

    Follow up with the counselling people, it is important to get it underway.

    If you are looking for some space, can you get out for a walk on your own for 30 mins per day.? I know the weather has changed considerably so wrap up warm , wear a hat and some comfortable shoes.

    I often go for a walk when I need to get some space to think. A regular walking pattern can help keep some way fit and help reduce the unnatural tiredness. You will probably sleep better too.

    The main thing is to take very good care of yourself. You are worth it!
    :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 650 ✭✭✭handbagmad


    Hi there,

    Follow up with the counselling people, it is important to get it underway.

    If you are looking for some space, can you get out for a walk on your own for 30 mins per day.? I know the weather has changed considerably so wrap up warm , wear a hat and some comfortable shoes.

    I often go for a walk when I need to get some space to think. A regular walking pattern can help keep some way fit and help reduce the unnatural tiredness. You will probably sleep better too.

    The main thing is to take very good care of yourself. You are worth it!
    :)

    hi del. i try to get out for walks but have become very panicky about going outside. I have an excersize bike I try use everyday.
    I am sleeping prob too much though.
    Terrible to say but I people in general are really annoying me lately and I all I want to do is tell them all to shut up!
    If I dont hear anything about councelling by the end of the week ill follow up with GP monday.
    Have a good week all.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 4 Nickname777


    Well this is my first ever thread. I am a 16 year old M and I am from Cork. I have struggled with social anxiety since 6th class, I am not sure what started it. Basically ever since I've spent my free time just sitting at hone in front of the computer, It never really affected my emotions until recently. You see, due to this I am 16 years old with NO friends. A few months ago I met this girl online, we are a similar age and have similar interests, she suffers from social Anxiety, As pathetic as it sounds we fell in 'love'?. I know we are young and probably unsure. The only problem is that she lives in America. A few weeks ago she relapsed into depression again due to some other guy. About 2 weeks ago she started to become stressed and overwhelmed with school and life. One of the things that made this hard for her is that I live so far away. So basically she asked if we could 'take a break'. She says she is unsure but I know its probably best if we do, for her sake. She told me this yesterday but I knew this was coming for a few days.

    This will probably be easier for her since she has some friends, but me, I have nobody. I don't want my family to know unless its necessary. I feel awful, she was the ONLY friend I had.

    Although I was okay being lonely before I met her, she built my heart up and now its broken. I don't know what to do. I guess thats why I am typing here. I have done a few things over the last few days that I am not happy with (Smoking, Cutting) although these dont help. I feel like I just want to 'Quit' but I refuse to, for my families sake.

    I guess this is me asking if anyone can tell me what to do, or not to do.
    I'm at a point where I just don't know what to do, and this whole situation is really making me depressed and I just need some guidance.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 396 ✭✭murria


    Well this is my first ever thread. I am a 16 year old M and I am from Cork. I have struggled with social anxiety since 6th class, I am not sure what started it. Basically ever since I've spent my free time just sitting at hone in front of the computer, It never really affected my emotions until recently. You see, due to this I am 16 years old with NO friends. A few months ago I met this girl online, we are a similar age and have similar interests, she suffers from social Anxiety, As pathetic as it sounds we fell in 'love'?. I know we are young and probably unsure. The only problem is that she lives in America. A few weeks ago she relapsed into depression again due to some other guy. About 2 weeks ago she started to become stressed and overwhelmed with school and life. One of the things that made this hard for her is that I live so far away. So basically she asked if we could 'take a break'. She says she is unsure but I know its probably best if we do, for her sake. She told me this yesterday but I knew this was coming for a few days.

    This will probably be easier for her since she has some friends, but me, I have nobody. I don't want my family to know unless its necessary. I feel awful, she was the ONLY friend I had.

    Although I was okay being lonely before I met her, she built my heart up and now its broken. I don't know what to do. I guess thats why I am typing here. I have done a few things over the last few days that I am not happy with (Smoking, Cutting) although these dont help. I feel like I just want to 'Quit' but I refuse to, for my families sake.

    I guess this is me asking if anyone can tell me what to do, or not to do.
    I'm at a point where I just don't know what to do, and this whole situation is really making me depressed and I just need some guidance.

    Hi

    I don't think you should try to tackle this by yourself you really need some support. The internet is great for information, but in your situation real world help will be of more benefit. If you have a good relationship with your parents ask them for help to get you some counselling or to arrange a visit with your doctor. If you can't turn to your parents, perhaps there is a trusted adult you can ask for help, for instance, another family member, school guidance counsellor, a good neighbour or family friend.

    This link has some useful information on where to get help. http://www.barnardos.ie/resources-advice/young-people/teen-help/finding-help.html

    Take care of yourself. :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 4 Nickname777


    murria wrote: »
    Hi

    I don't think you should try to tackle this by yourself you really need some support. The internet is great for information, but in your situation real world help will be of more benefit. If you have a good relationship with your parents ask them for help to get you some counselling or to arrange a visit with your doctor. If you can't turn to your parents, perhaps there is a trusted adult you can ask for help, for instance, another family member, school guidance counsellor, a good neighbour or family friend.

    This link has some useful information on where to get help. http://www.barnardos.ie/resources-advice/young-people/teen-help/finding-help.html

    Take care of yourself. :)
    Thanks mate, I never really knew my real father and my mom is like 8 months pregnant so I really don't want to stress her at the moment. I think you are right by saying I can't do this alone. I think I might try and see a councilor on my own someday or something, Thanks for the reply.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    Okay so I'm obsessing all evening about when the time comes to withdraw from my meds. How I will feel, what symptoms I'll get etc. reading horror stories on the net I know I shouldn't read these :( it's like I couldn't help myself searching. I hope I'll be okay. I'm quite wound up and anxious now. I should have left well enough alone so an evening wasted scaring myself


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 396 ✭✭murria


    Thanks mate, I never really knew my real father and my mom is like 8 months pregnant so I really don't want to stress her at the moment. I think you are right by saying I can't do this alone. I think I might try and see a councilor on my own someday or something, Thanks for the reply.

    You're very welcome. Do it sooner rather than later you'll feel a lot better if you even just speak to someone, especially if you have been keeping it to yourself for some time. You are still very young and it might change your life if you do something about it now.

    You deserve to be happy.:)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 396 ✭✭murria


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Okay so I'm obsessing all evening about when the time comes to withdraw from my meds. How I will feel, what symptoms I'll get etc. reading horror stories on the net I know I shouldn't read these :( it's like I couldn't help myself searching. I hope I'll be okay. I'm quite wound up and anxious now. I should have left well enough alone so an evening wasted scaring myself

    That's the kind of thing I do, scaring myself reading worst case scenarios on the intenet. The good news stories don't make such good reading. I'm sure your health care providers will try to make the transition as easy for you as possible and let them know your worries in advance.

    You've said it yourself, we should leave well alone (maybe its a girl thing my husband would never do that). Do you have any little techniques to help with anxiety? Maybe some minfulness meditation or a relaxation cd would help. I'm sending you a hug anyway, hope youre okay.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    murria wrote: »
    That's the kind of thing I do, scaring myself reading worst case scenarios on the intenet. The good news stories don't make such good reading. I'm sure your health care providers will try to make the transition as easy for you as possible and let them know your worries in advance.

    You've said it yourself, we should leave well alone (maybe its a girl thing my husband would never do that). Do you have any little techniques to help with anxiety? Maybe some minfulness meditation or a relaxation cd would help. I'm sending you a hug anyway, hope youre okay.

    Yeah I don't know why I do it, you do it too so at least I'm not alone :)
    I'm going to make a promise to myself From this moment on to stop the research into withdrawel symptoms, relapsing etc and just go with the flow because I'm only winding myself up looking at the negatives. Thanks for your reply Murria x


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Okay so I'm obsessing all evening about when the time comes to withdraw from my meds. How I will feel, what symptoms I'll get etc. reading horror stories on the net I know I shouldn't read these :( it's like I couldn't help myself searching. I hope I'll be okay. I'm quite wound up and anxious now. I should have left well enough alone so an evening wasted scaring myself

    How long is a piece of string?

    Stop !

    Please relax and take good care of yourself

    Best Regards
    :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    How long is a piece of string?

    Stop !

    Please relax and take good care of yourself

    Best Regards
    :)

    Yes I know you are right I do need to relax and stop torturing myself with what ifs and all that rubbish,

    Thanks del


  • Registered Users Posts: 64 ✭✭Totalelf


    Nickname 777, please do not feel you are alone. There are plenty of people out there to be friends with. Please contact teen agencies dealing with isolation and depression or the Samaritans, pieta house or any of the other agencies. Please believe you are special and unique, and just because you don't have a huge circle of friends, it doesn't mean you are less of a person, just rather more choosy about your friends. I am an extremely shy person with very few friends but I get by with fairly ok acquaintances. I wish you all the best in the future and please confide in your parents if you can and if not, please keep posting here, where you are amongst friends. Xx


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,159 ✭✭✭stinkle


    Am really bad today, was stressed yesterday and had to encounter problematic work people. Nothing bad happened but there's a bad atmosphere that I feel I am only feeding into. I need to face these people again today and am dreading it. I was hoping to get up early and get stuff done early but that didn't happen and I'm feeling guilty. Keep telling myself that it worked out ok though. Going round in circles in my brain and feeling awful for having a beer last night cos my stomachs in bits and have a stress headache. Will hopefully be able to leave early, fingers crossed. This is the first day in ages that I've needed to do my breathing


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 396 ✭✭murria


    stinkle wrote: »
    Am really bad today, was stressed yesterday and had to encounter problematic work people. Nothing bad happened but there's a bad atmosphere that I feel I am only feeding into. I need to face these people again today and am dreading it. I was hoping to get up early and get stuff done early but that didn't happen and I'm feeling guilty. Keep telling myself that it worked out ok though. Going round in circles in my brain and feeling awful for having a beer last night cos my stomachs in bits and have a stress headache. Will hopefully be able to leave early, fingers crossed. This is the first day in ages that I've needed to do my breathing

    Hi Stinkle,

    The thing about techniques like breathing or tapping is that they are so useful for exactly times like this. Do your breathing, go look at yourself in the mirror and smile at yourself. Now let it pass and let go of it. The important part of your post is the bit in bold, nothing happened and you are okay. It's not all your fault.

    A colleague annoyed me this morning and instead of dealing with it I did the old passive aggressive thing. I logged in here and saw your post and realised what I was doing. I have had a little tap and I'm now laughing at myself.

    So come on Stinkle, it's Friday, no work tomorrow, let's make a decision now to make the rest of today better and do something nice over the weekend. Smiles on faces (even if we have to fake it):)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    Have first session of psychology today with a new person. Bit nervous but hoping it goes okay. Don't like opening up to strangers and not sure what to even talk about?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,308 ✭✭✭Hersheys


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Have first session of psychology today with a new person. Bit nervous but hoping it goes okay. Don't like opening up to strangers and not sure what to even talk about?
    They will lead the session.

    Best of luck xx


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    Hersheys wrote: »
    They will lead the session.

    Best of luck xx

    Thanks it went well. He helped me understand stuff even after the first session which was an assessment. I told him my fears of being sick again and also fears of withdrawing from meds when the time comes. He really helped my look at these fears from an outside perspective. When I was coming out it just so happens my psychiatrist was there and she asked how I'm getting on. She really put my mind at ease too. Have to say I've some great professionals working with me I'm lucky.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,159 ✭✭✭stinkle


    murria wrote: »
    Hi Stinkle,

    The thing about techniques like breathing or tapping is that they are so useful for exactly times like this. Do your breathing, go look at yourself in the mirror and smile at yourself. Now let it pass and let go of it. The important part of your post is the bit in bold, nothing happened and you are okay. It's not all your fault.

    A colleague annoyed me this morning and instead of dealing with it I did the old passive aggressive thing. I logged in here and saw your post and realised what I was doing. I have had a little tap and I'm now laughing at myself.

    So come on Stinkle, it's Friday, no work tomorrow, let's make a decision now to make the rest of today better and do something nice over the weekend. Smiles on faces (even if we have to fake it):)

    thanks so much for the support, I read i earlier but couldnt reply and it helped a lot. Glad to have helped your situation too! I've been avoiding my stressful work situation a lot, which is great, but the odd time when I have to deal with these people is magnified so I stress.

    Really didnt have the energy to put a brave face on it today but did ok! I'm the type of person that if someone has upset me or if I know they cant be trusted then I get very cold around them. Not rude, but I just find it hard to be chirpy when I've been hurt, and can't even look them in the eye. I guess its a defence mechanism, though it sounds childish of me. I managed to be pleasant around the difficult people (just talking about weather etc) and felt better for my efforts. Maybe I'm getting more mature! In fairness, I also had a lot built up in my head too, it was probably never going to be as bad as I had assumed either.

    Got to meet with lots of decent people too which gave me a lift and made it easier to deal with the others. Then after speaking with a friend about all the stuff I have to do a lightbulb went off in my head and I just decided to postpone the stuff that can be postponed. Just talking out loud was brilliant! I was trying to cram a lot into next week - the reason for that is that I'm actually desperate to wind down before the time comes to leave the job, but every week it's like more and more things get added to the list; so I was planning an ambitious week to get lots finished, but was dreading it too.

    Am back in the "nice" environment now having tea and a cake as a reward for doing ok. Treated myself to a taxi earlier when I managed to escape and it felt good speeding away. Postponing stuff now means I have more free time this weekend and will try to meet some supportive friends later tonight (as now I wont be working late!). Things actually turned out ok, and I'm so grateful for the help and support.

    One little blip was a stupid email I got regarding some work my colleague often leaves till the last minute/isnt very conscientious about, which causes problems for other people. They were being called on it by someone senior and I have an awful feeling that they'll try to push the blame onto me somehow or dramatise it to make me look bad, now that someone else is on their case. It's in the back of my mind all day but I'm trying to put into action the stuff the therapist has recommended, i.e. it nothing will probably happen, and if it does it can be dealt with then, no point in worrying over something you have no control over.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 396 ✭✭murria


    Glad you made it through the day Stinkle. I'm not sure if you realise, but you always seem to reason everything out as you're writing and by the time you've posted it sounds like you have a grip on things. Thank God things rarely turn out like we imagine.

    My colleague popped in to ask me for some advice later this morning, and then left me a Wispa bar to thank me!! One of us got the wrong end of the stick and I think it might have been me. :o

    Enjoy your weekend.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,835 ✭✭✭✭cloud493


    Have been doing worse than usual over the past couple of weeks. Hoped it'd pass, but it hasn't. Not a great feeling.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4 Nickname777


    Totalelf wrote: »
    Nickname 777, please do not feel you are alone. There are plenty of people out there to be friends with. Please contact teen agencies dealing with isolation and depression or the Samaritans, pieta house or any of the other agencies. Please believe you are special and unique, and just because you don't have a huge circle of friends, it doesn't mean you are less of a person, just rather more choosy about your friends. I am an extremely shy person with very few friends but I get by with fairly ok acquaintances. I wish you all the best in the future and please confide in your parents if you can and if not, please keep posting here, where you are amongst friends. Xx

    Thanks for the message, it helps me feel better, I am not as depressed as I was that day but I fell I need to do something to stop it happening again, thank you for your kind words of support. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 396 ✭✭murria


    cloud493 wrote: »
    Have been doing worse than usual over the past couple of weeks. Hoped it'd pass, but it hasn't. Not a great feeling.

    That's a pain Cloud. Maybe it's also got to do with being out of routine, like mid-term and then back to regular hours this week. Hang in there and give things a chance to settle down for a bit. Ask for help if you need it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    cloud493 wrote: »
    Have been doing worse than usual over the past couple of weeks. Hoped it'd pass, but it hasn't. Not a great feeling.

    Hope it passes for you soon cloud. Hang on in there and we are all here for you .


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  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional West Moderators Posts: 60,721 Mod ✭✭✭✭Gremlinertia


    Heading home later from a few days in england. It's been a relaxing time, small waves of panic about coming back now but that's how it is i guess.

    Haven't been on here much, hope you are all still battling ahead.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,159 ✭✭✭stinkle


    murria wrote: »
    Glad you made it through the day Stinkle. I'm not sure if you realise, but you always seem to reason everything out as you're writing and by the time you've posted it sounds like you have a grip on things. Thank God things rarely turn out like we imagine.

    My colleague popped in to ask me for some advice later this morning, and then left me a Wispa bar to thank me!! One of us got the wrong end of the stick and I think it might have been me. :o

    Enjoy your weekend.

    weekend was good, caught up on sleep and relaxed a lot. I felt a bit weird yesterday cos I felt I hadn;t "achieved" anything with my weekend and was having the Sunday evening blues. Told myself that I needed that relax time and there was no reason to feel that way. Sometimes I volunteer on weekends but had already done some helping out earlier in the week so maybe that's why I felt strange.

    Just thought I'd highlight the bit in bold above - it's a huge compliment actually but also helpful! Writing like that is therapeutic for me, but also is a bonus in my line of work. Getting stuff written focuses the mind a bit and helps me think of solutions a bit quicker. For me anyway, if I dont write stuff down it doesnt get done, but I only apply that to my work schedule but am thinking of incorporating it into normal life - eg bit of exercise, plan proper meals, spread out boring chores etc, to take the edge off feeling overwhelmed all the time.

    Work has been grand today, I woke with a bit of dread but no need really, other than my usual stress of hating havng to ask for help. I might need to stay a bit later but don't mind too much as there's an interesting job with my name written all over it. Am throwing myself into job hunting, am sick of feeling trapped here but that's what it is. If I quit without somewhere to go we have no money; all I can do is wait out my contract and at least be eligible for dole, or hope that something new comes my way before that happens.

    I hope MOnday isn't too bad for everyone. I dropped my keys earlier and was really cheered (and mortified!) after a kind stranger chased after me with them. Had music on so couldnt hear if they were shouting at me or not :o just had a feeling it was going to be a good day, and so far, so good.


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional West Moderators Posts: 60,721 Mod ✭✭✭✭Gremlinertia


    Back and in work in less than 24 hours. Back to earth with a bang.. :( Oh well, shields up, march on..


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,159 ✭✭✭stinkle


    Hopefully the thoughts of work are worse than the reality, and the few days away did you good


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    Found out that my mother in law told all her family (sisters and brothers) about my 3 month depression this year and me being in hospital. She also told her neighbour. So annoyed :(. It's a private matter and she should never have done this.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Found out that my mother in law told all her family (sisters and brothers) about my 3 month depression this year and me being in hospital. She also told her neighbour. So annoyed :(. It's a private matter and she should never have done this.

    You are quite correct, it is a personal, private matter.

    Don't let it upset you , instead continue to look after yourself. Don't get sidetracked worrying about other people and what they may or may not think.

    Be kind to yourself.:)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    You are quite correct, it is a personal, private matter.

    Don't let it upset you , instead continue to look after yourself. Don't get sidetracked worrying about other people and what they may or may not think.

    Be kind to yourself.:)

    Thanks, nothing I can do about it now anyway. It's something I would never ever do to somebody.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,958 ✭✭✭delthedriver


    lukesmom wrote: »
    Thanks, nothing I can do about it now anyway. It's something I would never ever do to somebody.

    Mother-in-law, who would be without one! Take her off your Xmas card list !

    LOL :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 15,676 ✭✭✭✭herisson


    I got such good news today but i literally cant be happy because of another thing that has been nagging me and nagging me. Im so down because of this and i cant stop crying. Its easy for people to say i need to focus on the positive but the negative just has such a strong hold on me that i cant get rid of it.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,400 ✭✭✭lukesmom


    I got such good news today but i literally cant be happy because of another thing that has been nagging me and nagging me. Im so down because of this and i cant stop crying. Its easy for people to say i need to focus on the positive but the negative just has such a strong hold on me that i cant get rid of it.

    Hi is there anybody you can speak to about this thing nagging you? Family or a friend? To get it off your chest might help a bit.


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