What are the worst things you can say on a first date?

IvaBigWun · 15-07-2008 01:51PM #1

"Im an accountant"

"All the voices in my head agree that you are the one for us"

"You remind me a lot of my old girlfriend. She's not around any more, but it doesn't bother me, no really I never think about her, well not that often, I miss her, she was gorgeous"

"Oooh your top is lovely, looks great with those shoes and that necklace just sets the whole outfit right off! Where do you shop?"

"I hear you like it up the arse?"

"Let me tell you all about this internet forum I post on it's really cool right, these guys, some of them are really funny right, sometimes I say funny stuff too one of them is called Lasers Pew Pew, mad, and this one time they got into trouble with a promotions company and it might be going to court and everything and sometimes they have to ban people off it for being too rude right but it's gas and I'm on it in work the whole time and theres always jokes on it and funny pictures but serious stuff too you should try it it's kinda cool"

over to you ...

Keano · 15-07-2008 01:53PM

Mention your username.

IvaBigWun · 15-07-2008 01:54PM

Keano A Legend wrote: »

Mention your username.

Im thinking bout subscribing just to change it.

Ostrom · 15-07-2008 01:55PM

Before we proceed I am obligated to inform you that I am a registered sex offender

Adam · 15-07-2008 01:55PM

You smell just like my sister.

Steve_o · 15-07-2008 01:55PM

"So you had the beef, thats €16.... sure i'll throw in the other 20"

Date / Fail....

funk-you · 15-07-2008 01:55PM

"Yeh, the test results are back soon"

"Is that smell of piss from me or you?"

"Chloroform smells weird doesn't it"

-Funk

ntlbell · 15-07-2008 01:56PM

"Sorry I'm late, got delayed at the STD clinic.."

thelordofcheese · 15-07-2008 01:56PM

IvaBigWun wrote: »

"I hear you like it up the arse?"

Oddly enough i know a girl for whom that's true. Excluding yore ma, of course.....

anyway the worst thing would probably be

"Get in the van"

c - 13 · 15-07-2008 01:56PM

Her: So what do you do for a living ?
Me: Engineering

Usually kills it right there

Splinter · 15-07-2008 02:00PM

yeah i study in the snyper school of mating habits

IvaBigWun · 15-07-2008 02:01PM

Mirror wrote: »

You smell just like my sister.

Proper lol!

Adam · 15-07-2008 02:02PM

splinter wrote: »

yeah i study in the snyper school of mating habits

:pac:

stevecrow74 · 15-07-2008 02:02PM

hello mum!!

Sherifu · 15-07-2008 02:06PM

I don't play games like that. I'm completely single, I'm very intelligent, I'm great in bed, I make great money. Believe it or not, I'm a complete catch. I've only been single four months; I had a long distance relationship for about a year, it's very tough to maintain it like that; there's nothing wrong with me. As a matter of fact I'm one of the few men in the city that has nothing wrong with him. So I'm giving you the three o'clock deadline. If I don't hear from you by then, you lose my number — I'm erasing your number right now, so you won't be hearing back from me.

So that's it: three o'clock tomorrow, or you can just completely forget it.

Now I understand if you've got other issues, maybe you're not playing games, I don't know… maybe you were abused in childhood?…Maybe your mother has cancer, and you're going to chemo…maybe you're just a person who's extremely frightened or has an anxiety disorder, maybe you're on some medication for that…I don't know, there could be another issue that I'm not aware of. But nobody says "Call me," hands a person a business card and then doesn't return calls. It's extremely passive aggressive. You should actually look that up, passive-aggressive personality disorder. You let me know, if you've got issues, psychological issues, if you're on any sort of medication for anxiety or depression, I'm not interested. But if you're psychologically normal, and you haven't called me because there's been some horrible thing that's happened in your life that's prevented you from returning my calls, that's fine. But otherwise? Don't call me. Okay, bye.

Pompey Magnus · 15-07-2008 02:06PM

"Do you want to go for a drive up the Wicklow Mountains in my van?"

My mate said this once, it didn't go down too well for some reason.

garrincha62 · 15-07-2008 02:11PM

I'm from Meath.

Niamho! · 15-07-2008 02:13PM

c - 13 wrote: »

Her: So what do you do for a living ?
Me: Engineering

Usually kills it right there

thats coz i reckon its one of those jobs people just dont understand 100% ?? ...just me? lol. I always think "Engineering what?"

Larianne · 15-07-2008 02:14PM

Sherifu wrote: »

I don't play games like that. I'm completely single, I'm very intelligent, I'm great in bed, I make great money. Believe it or not, I'm a complete catch. I've only been single four months; I had a long distance relationship for about a year, it's very tough to maintain it like that; there's nothing wrong with me. As a matter of fact I'm one of the few men in the city that has nothing wrong with him. So I'm giving you the three o'clock deadline. If I don't hear from you by then, you lose my number — I'm erasing your number right now, so you won't be hearing back from me.

So that's it: three o'clock tomorrow, or you can just completely forget it.

Now I understand if you've got other issues, maybe you're not playing games, I don't know… maybe you were abused in childhood?…Maybe your mother has cancer, and you're going to chemo…maybe you're just a person who's extremely frightened or has an anxiety disorder, maybe you're on some medication for that…I don't know, there could be another issue that I'm not aware of. But nobody says "Call me," hands a person a business card and then doesn't return calls. It's extremely passive aggressive. You should actually look that up, passive-aggressive personality disorder. You let me know, if you've got issues, psychological issues, if you're on any sort of medication for anxiety or depression, I'm not interested. But if you're psychologically normal, and you haven't called me because there's been some horrible thing that's happened in your life that's prevented you from returning my calls, that's fine. But otherwise? Don't call me. Okay, bye.

I heard that guy on the radio as well. Freako!

BubbleWrap85 · 15-07-2008 02:16PM

Well if the date isn't going to well women could always say:

"How many babies would you like?"
"These are the names I've already picked out: _________"
"No I can't come out Tuesday I've to help Daddy milk the cows"
"My last boyfriend never wanted to put it up there"
"What's a blowjob?"

That'd surely turn into a worst kind of date for yer man! :P

Claire121 · 15-07-2008 02:17PM

"Don't you ever wear skirts? My ex used to wear these knee length floaty skirts, it looked really hot."

Still with him 18 months later :rolleyes:

Blitzkrieger · 15-07-2008 02:21PM

How about "My mam died on Tuesday" followed by "I'm kind of sad, but she was sick for a long time".

God help me that was a cringe-worthy night......

pwd · 15-07-2008 02:21PM

eh most girls would like being complimented about their clothes.
Dumbest things I've had said to me are "I'm engaged by the way", "I have a boyfriend but I think I'll dump him and go out with you", and that I look like ronan keating - Wow I'm so complimented you think I look like a smug closet case cheers. Oh and "one of your friends is gay" and refusing to tell me which one. Of course I guessed wrongly and spent ages trying to get one of my non-gay friends to come out to me before finding out who it actually was. The non-gay guy in question was inhibited and unsure of himself and me dropping loads of hints that I thought he was gay probably did nothing good for his confidence doh.
Haven't said too much dumb stuff myself (I'd be more likely to be just dumb in the literal sense) though I did get a dirty look one time for suggesting someone took their top off in the park when they said it was too hot. (It was a single piece top apparently but it looked like a jumper over a blouse).
And I did unsettle my gf a bit when I tried to take her for a walk down the pier in dun laoghaire in the dark on our second date

. (No thanks mr possible serial killer lets stay away from the empty dark alleys for the moment huh)

LouOB · 15-07-2008 02:21PM

'I have a nick name called the clit crusher'

The Bollox · 15-07-2008 02:22PM

you: "would you like me to give you a motorboat?"

her: "what's a motorboat"

and the rest writes itself

BubbleWrap85 · 15-07-2008 02:23PM

pwd wrote: »

eh most girls would like being complimented about their clothes.
Dumbest things I've had said to me are "I'm engaged by the way", "I have a boyfriend but I think I'll dump him and go out with you", and that I look like ronan keating - Wow I'm so complimented you think I look like a smug closet case cheers. Oh and "one of your friends is gay" and refusing to tell me which one. Of course I guessed wrongly and spent ages trying to get one of my non-gay friends to come out to me before finding out who it actually was. The non-gay guy in question was inhibited and unsure of himself and me dropping loads of hints that I thought he was gay probably did nothing good for his confidence doh.
Haven't said too much dumb stuff myself (I'd be more likely to be just dumb in the literal sense) though I did get a dirty look one time for suggesting someone took their top off in the park when they said it was too hot. (It was a single piece top apparently but it looked like a jumper over a blouse).
And I did unsettle my gf a bit when I tried to take her for a walk down the pier in dun laoghaire in the dark on our second date . (No thanks mr possible serial killer lets stay away from the empty dark alleys for the moment huh)

Lol I also think "I don't believe in sex before marriage" would be a pretty good one...........or "I don't believe in shaving my legs/underarms/bikini line. I like the natural look".

Toto Wolfcastle · 15-07-2008 02:23PM

I have a friend who, after a second date, is wondering if the guy will mind if she goes travelling next May. I told not to ask him!

So basically, making plans for 10 months in advance that early is a big no-no!

taidghbaby · 15-07-2008 02:26PM

dont you have a younger, better looking sister??

15-07-2008 02:27PM

"You're a farmer right?"

"You remind me so much of my mother"

"You really hoovered that food into ya there"

"Just wait here a second I'm bursting for a ****e" (while walking on the beach)

IvaBigWun · 15-07-2008 02:28PM

"Are ye ridin' or wha?"

"Wanna go halfs on a b@stard?"

Adam · 15-07-2008 02:29PM

Sherifu wrote: »

I don't play games like that. I'm completely single, I'm very intelligent, I'm great in bed, I make great money. Believe it or not, I'm a complete catch. I've only been single four months; I had a long distance relationship for about a year, it's very tough to maintain it like that; there's nothing wrong with me. As a matter of fact I'm one of the few men in the city that has nothing wrong with him. So I'm giving you the three o'clock deadline. If I don't hear from you by then, you lose my number — I'm erasing your number right now, so you won't be hearing back from me.

So that's it: three o'clock tomorrow, or you can just completely forget it.

Now I understand if you've got other issues, maybe you're not playing games, I don't know… maybe you were abused in childhood?…Maybe your mother has cancer, and you're going to chemo…maybe you're just a person who's extremely frightened or has an anxiety disorder, maybe you're on some medication for that…I don't know, there could be another issue that I'm not aware of. But nobody says "Call me," hands a person a business card and then doesn't return calls. It's extremely passive aggressive. You should actually look that up, passive-aggressive personality disorder. You let me know, if you've got issues, psychological issues, if you're on any sort of medication for anxiety or depression, I'm not interested. But if you're psychologically normal, and you haven't called me because there's been some horrible thing that's happened in your life that's prevented you from returning my calls, that's fine. But otherwise? Don't call me. Okay, bye.

How wonderfully abnormal. Great work that guy.

What are the worst things you can say on a first date?

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