What's the etiquette here??

tgdaly · 13-12-2020 11:37am

7,000 posts lads well done, 70% of the way to a part 2 thread

Bullocks · 13-12-2020 11:44am

tgdaly wrote: »

7,000 posts lads well done, 70% of the way to a part 2 thread

There will be a second thread , just like poo you can't stop it coming!

Lewis_Benson · 13-12-2020 11:48am

tgdaly wrote: »

7,000 posts lads well done, 70% of the way to a part 2 thread

There's always garuntee of a 'Number 2" with this thread.

fuerte1976 · 13-12-2020 12:51pm

Pity J Flash isn't around to see it fester and stew it's way to chapter 2..

tgdaly · 13-12-2020 2:54pm

fuerte1976 wrote: »

Pity J Flash isn't around to see it fester and stew it's way to chapter 2..

Maybe we should incorporate J Flash into the title of th next thread "Toilet Etiquette Part 2: The JohnnyFlash memorial thread"

Lewis_Benson · 13-12-2020 8:40pm

fuerte1976 wrote: »

Pity J Flash isn't around to see it fester and stew it's way to chapter 2..

Oh he's around alright...

Hector Savage · 14-12-2020 12:00pm

Pintman Paddy Losty wrote: »

The **** obviously had first hand experience of it. Must have worked for the state or at least a semi state. My guess is he was a general operative working for Bord na Mona or summat like that.

Do you work for Bord na Mona ?

Hector Savage · 14-12-2020 12:03pm

Deleted User wrote: »

A trend has emerged at work lately among the younger lads, when the traps are all occupied they stand in line outside the cubicles like they were in a nightclub. I myself would just leave and let whoever was in there finish up in peace and come back when the coast (and fent) is clear. There's nothing worse than crapping under pressure.
I believe this is a breach of etiquette, what do the esteemed members of this thread think?

Christ, such an awkward thing to do too, I blame social media and phones, peoples social skills just aren;t developed anymore ..

EmmetSpiceland · 14-12-2020 12:12pm

tgdaly wrote: »

Maybe we should incorporate J Flash into the title of th next thread "Toilet Etiquette Part 2: The JohnnyFlash memorial thread"

Should arrange a 21-flush salute.

Sardonicat · 14-12-2020 12:19pm

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

Should arrange a 21-flush salute.

What about a 21 toot salute?

14-12-2020 12:23pm

Hector Savage wrote: »

Christ, such an awkward thing to do too, I blame social media and phones, peoples social skills just aren;t developed anymore ..

Probably weren't wearing socks either

fuerte1976 · 14-12-2020 2:04pm

Lewis_Benson wrote: »

Oh he's around alright...

I don't doubt he is...

Speaking of 'deceased', there's something dead inside me this day...

Dual wheels · 14-12-2020 11:54pm

Had a couple of bananas this evening out of convenience japers they went through me

Bullocks · 15-12-2020 8:16am

Dual wheels wrote: »

Had a couple of bananas this evening out of convenience japers they went through me

I thought bananas usually went slow through the bends?

15-12-2020 8:23am

Bullocks wrote: »

I thought bananas usually went slow through the bends?

Bananas/pears the yin/yang of bowel movements.

That chap must have been in desperate straights if they went through. Or else they were rotten

Brendan Bendar · 15-12-2020 10:00am

MikeOxsgreen wrote: »

Bananas/pears the yin/yang of bowel movements.

That chap must have been in desperate straights if they went through. Or else they were rotten

Well used to rotten or ‘blown’ produce yourself Oxgreen.

Fair auld ‘ coating’ of bag brie and muzzle mites on the back of the ‘EezyFitt’ Dockers.

Whites Laundry rejected them back in the lockdown and called in pest control in haz gear.

I’ll use this post to issue a general warning about Xmas Pud, tends to bind the midden and make it difficult to discharge, so a few pears before bed and she should fly out like burst bag of cheap cat food around 0600 hrs.

15-12-2020 10:36am

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

Well used to rotten or ‘blown’ produce yourself Oxgreen.

Fair auld ‘ coating’ of bag brie and muzzle mites on the back of the ‘EezyFitt’ Dockers.

Whites Laundry rejected them back in the lockdown and called in pest control in haz gear.

I’ll use this post to issue a general warning about Xmas Pud, tends to bind the midden and make it difficult to discharge, so a few pears before bed and she should fly out like burst bag of cheap cat food around 0600 hrs.

Always keep a blackening banana in the fruit bowl for those post 20oz T-bones, rather than having to shove in some crap vegetables to ease it along.

Pudding can be very sticky all right coming around the final furlong before the home straight. Lash in the brandy and whiskey into a bowl.Toss the raisins and mixed peel in the bin, and enjoy.

Hotblack Desiato · 15-12-2020 12:16pm

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

I’ll use this post to issue a general warning about Xmas Pud, tends to bind the midden and make it difficult to discharge, so a few pears before bed and she should fly out like burst bag of cheap cat food around 0600 hrs.

That's a bit of a problem if you don't wake up until 0700.

But yes, very important to keep things moving along during the next two weeks or so, increased food intake can lead to great distress otherwise. I don't know how non-stout drinkers cope tbh.

Purple Mountain · 15-12-2020 12:47pm

Gael23 wrote: »

How does a man deal with bits of Spaghetti that get stuck in the trapdoor?

Vermox.

Dual wheels · 15-12-2020 8:10pm

MikeOxsgreen wrote: »

Bananas/pears the yin/yang of bowel movements.

That chap must have been in desperate straights if they went through. Or else they were rotten

Ah they were fairly rotten alright

Nevin Parsnipp · 16-12-2020 12:35pm

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

Well used to rotten or ‘blown’ produce yourself Oxgreen.

Fair auld ‘ coating’ of bag brie and muzzle mites on the back of the ‘EezyFitt’ Dockers.

Whites Laundry rejected them back in the lockdown and called in pest control in haz gear.

I’ll use this post to issue a general warning about Xmas Pud, tends to bind the midden and make it difficult to discharge, so a few pears before bed and she should fly out like burst bag of cheap cat food around 0600 hrs.

The beur from Whites brought them home for a deep clean and left them steeping near the chow trough.

Nevin Parsnipp · 16-12-2020 12:36pm

Brendan Bendar · 16-12-2020 1:21pm

Nevin Parsnipp wrote: »

Excellent post Nevin.......your best yet in my opinion

Clear as your last arse-wad

Dual wheels · 16-12-2020 2:04pm

Toilets will get some respite this Christmas

Lewis_Benson · 16-12-2020 9:21pm

Going for a chicken Tikka kebab just now, and a bag of chips, garlic nan, and a few cans to wash it down.
I'll report on the movement in the morning.

16-12-2020 9:29pm

Lewis_Benson wrote: »

Going for a chicken Tikka kebab just now, and a bag of chips, garlic nan, and a few cans to wash it down.
I'll report on the movement in the morning.

Doubt you'll have to wait till then.

Gael23 · 16-12-2020 10:11pm

Been having frequent small movements all day, nothing spectacular being flushed into Ringsend

Lewis_Benson · 16-12-2020 11:44pm

MikeOxsgreen wrote: »

Doubt you'll have to wait till then.

You could be right....

16-12-2020 11:53pm

Lewis_Benson wrote: »

You could be right....

You in trouble?

Brendan Bendar · 17-12-2020 9:27am

Gael23 wrote: »

Been having frequent small movements all day, nothing spectacular being flushed into Ringsend

Just as well, the lads in the shït farm will be full of Porter and bacon from the nearest ‘cavvery’ by mid morning.

Bang of porter and cabbage set off the Fcuking ‘stench hooter’ at the incinerator and the Sandymount ladies were holding perfumed lace hankies to their noses.

Filthy kernts.

gerrybbadd · 17-12-2020 12:21pm

Ah lads, the house is stink of rotten eggs this morning. The entire structure seems to be permeated by the smell.

Made a grand bit of chilli last night, jazzed it up nicely, topping it off with diced raw onion, cheese and crumbled crunchy bacon. Couple cans of Diet Coke along with it, and a feed of rice.

The brown angels were blowing the trumpet all night under the duvet. The dog seemed desperate to get out into the fresh air this morning, so I knew the nasal assault was getting too much for him. He could probably hear the music from upstairs as well, and i'm sure, if it's possible in canines, he had a feeling of impending doom.

I'm not long back from dropping off the load there now, and i've not seen anything like it in a while. The only thing I can compare it with, is a perfectly tempered dose of melted chocolate, perhaps that one might use for a cake or "rice Krispie buns". However, as I had the phone with me for entertainment purposes, and i was there a while, it sat in the bottom of the bowl for an extended period prior to flushing. The expulsion actually had a skin on it. Or perhaps it had some form of it's own physics, clinging together to form a surface tension. I'd like to see Hawking explain that! (bit tough seeing as he's dead - maybe the other buck, DeGrasse Tyson?

Nevin Parsnipp · 17-12-2020 3:42pm

Nevin Parsnipp wrote: »

Nevin Parsnipp · 17-12-2020 3:48pm

gerrybbadd wrote: »

Ah lads, the house is stink of rotten eggs this morning. The entire structure seems to be permeated by the smell.

Made a grand bit of chilli last night, jazzed it up nicely, topping it off with diced raw onion, cheese and crumbled crunchy bacon. Couple cans of Diet Coke along with it, and a feed of rice.

The brown angels were blowing the trumpet all night under the duvet. The dog seemed desperate to get out into the fresh air this morning, so I knew the nasal assault was getting too much for him. He could probably hear the music from upstairs as well, and i'm sure, if it's possible in canines, he had a feeling of impending doom.

I'm not long back from dropping off the load there now, and i've not seen anything like it in a while. The only thing I can compare it with, is a perfectly tempered dose of melted chocolate, perhaps that one might use for a cake or "rice Krispie buns". However, as I had the phone with me for entertainment purposes, and i was there a while, it sat in the bottom of the bowl for an extended period prior to flushing. The expulsion actually had a skin on it. Or perhaps it had some form of it's own physics, clinging together to form a surface tension. I'd like to see Hawking explain that! (bit tough seeing as he's dead - maybe the other buck, DeGrasse Tyson?

U seem a bit surprised that the house would have a bad smell ?

Don't know why - given that "Ar$e Burst" that you described . !!

You need to look at your diet Bud.......

EmmetSpiceland · 17-12-2020 4:03pm

Nevin Parsnipp wrote: »

You’ve been trying to “embed” twitter links, among other things, into your posts. And you’ve done it in other threads too.

Just makes you look like an amateur, N. Sort it out, yeah?

Brendan Bendar · 17-12-2020 4:17pm

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

You’ve been trying to “embed” twitter links, among other things, into your posts. And you’ve done it in other threads too.

Just makes you look like an amateur, N. Sort it out, yeah?

Has the PC hooked up to the ‘Labbadoors’ Hole and feedin the the Fcukker with blown pork mince hoping to generate enough power to run the device.

Needs to let it ‘settle’ for another three or four days.... like wait till the white lads start a bit of a stir.

Simples.

KarlMarks · 17-12-2020 4:21pm

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

Has the PC hooked up to the ‘Labbadoors’ Hole and feedin the the Fcukker with blown pork mince hoping to generate enough power to run the device.

Needs to let it ‘settle’ for another three or four days.... like wait till the white lads start a bit of a stir.

Simples.

Shut the phuq up you stupid fat kunt.

Brendan Bendar · 17-12-2020 4:29pm

KarlMarks wrote: »

Shut the phuq up you stupid fat kunt.

:eek:

Da fuuuhrke !!!!

Someone must have dipped his knob in this lads soup.

I’m all broke up here....

EmmetSpiceland · 17-12-2020 4:38pm

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

Has the PC hooked up to the ‘Labbadoors’ Hole and feedin the the Fcukker with blown pork mince hoping to generate enough power to run the device.

Needs to let it ‘settle’ for another three or four days.... like wait till the white lads start a bit of a stir.

Simples.

I was going to “suggest” maybe a ECDL course for seniors, down at the community centre. I guess they’ll all have moved online.

‘Computing for Coffin Dodgers’, might even see a few familiar faces from the parochial house in attendance. They mightn’t recognise him unless he drops a pen, or some such.

Hector Savage · 17-12-2020 6:02pm

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

:eek:

Da fuuuhrke !!!!

Someone must have dipped his knob in this lads soup.

I’m all broke up here....

I reckon this lad got more than a neptunes kiss the last time he deposited a kilo of yobble into the public jax in the phoenix park.

Probably slipped in some shight on the way out too - got it on his hands .... no soap there either.

Nothing to it but get it all over the steering wheel of the 1996 Ford escort.

Brendan Bendar · 17-12-2020 6:15pm

Hector Savage wrote: »

I reckon this lad got more than a neptunes kiss the last time he deposited a kilo of yobble into the public jax in the phoenix park.

Probably slipped in some shight on the way out too - got it on his hands .... no soap there either.

Nothing to it but get it all over the steering wheel of the 1996 Ford escort.

Could have ‘dhropped the kex’ there at the Army grounds and got a dart of a scabby wand.

Has all the appearance of that, can’t think what else it could be.

We’ll let bygones be bygones.

Slideways · 17-12-2020 8:14pm

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

Could have ‘dhropped the kex’ there at the Army grounds and got a dart of a scabby wand.

Has all the appearance of that, can’t think what else it could be.

We’ll let bygones be bygones.

A certain former member of Dáil Éireann liked going for walks up that way

Brendan Bendar · 17-12-2020 9:59pm

Slideways wrote: »

A certain former member of Dáil Éireann liked going for walks up that way

Labour lad was he?

Slideways · 18-12-2020 1:31am

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

Labour lad was he?

That’s the buchaill. Into long country walks, pastel colours, flower arranging and hanging around public toilets making a nuisance of himself

Hotblack Desiato · 18-12-2020 11:50am

It was Dublin's first "park and ride" facility. Alan Dukes was caught there with his bit on the side once too

Nevin Parsnipp · 18-12-2020 5:15pm

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

I was going to “suggest” maybe a ECDL course for seniors, down at the community centre. I guess they’ll all have moved online.

‘Computing for Coffin Dodgers’, might even see a few familiar faces from the parochial house in attendance. They mightn’t recognise him unless he drops a pen, or some such.

A rather sour post aimed at one of the most respected posters in these parts ....won't be forgotten ..so it won't ..

Just sayin....

Brendan Bendar · 18-12-2020 5:38pm

Hotblack Desiato wrote: »

It was Dublin's first "park and ride" facility. Alan Dukes was caught there with his bit on the side once too

Eh... didn’t know that dusty dreary lad could could work up a bit of ‘box batther’ up on a lass.

Very surprised.

18-12-2020 5:57pm

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

Eh... didn’t know that dusty dreary lad could could work up a bit of ‘box batther’ up on a lass.

Very surprised.

He used to have the neighbours smoking after pleasuring one of his strumpets.
Hence the nickname

Brendan Bendar · 18-12-2020 8:17pm

MikeOxsgreen wrote: »

He used to have the neighbours smoking after pleasuring one of his strumpets.
Hence the nickname

Nickname?

What nickname?

Shuffle legs?

18-12-2020 8:20pm

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

Nickname?

What nickname?

Shuffle legs?

Smokey IIRC

EmmetSpiceland · 18-12-2020 8:36pm

Nevin Parsnipp wrote: »

A rather sour post aimed at one of the most respected posters in these parts ....won't be forgotten ..so it won't ..

Just sayin....

Was nothing personal, N.

When it comes to twitter links, or any non-image links, you just paste it firstly to the post. When you embed the link using the image icon or putting the IMG “tags” around it the site thinks you’re posting an image so the post appears blank.

Most of us caught on to these things quite early in our “time” on the site, but that’s ok, we all learn at different speeds.

Maybe write it down there on one of your circles of paper.

What's the etiquette here??

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