What was your biggest "get me out of here!" moment in a relationship?

XavierBoThang

me_right_one wrote: »

I think you're confused, this is the "get out of here" thread, not the "definitely a keeper" thread.

I bet he has cauliflower older than you in his top shelf

reason vs religion

corner of hells wrote: »

I'm after looking back through 600 or so posts to find out what upset you and would like to take this moment to offer an apol.....

Doorbell, pizzas here.

I'm laughing at how obnoxious a person you are.

mad m

s4uv3 wrote: »

Yes please do ken.
Thank you kindly

Yay.....scary story....nut job.

Train Dragon

Train Dragon wrote: »

What was your biggest "get me out of here!" moment in a relationship?

I was just driving down Leeson Street tonight and I remembered another fleeting relationship long confined to the nether regions of my cerebral cortex. It's very much a 'Get her out of here relationship', though. One winter night during the glory days of the Celtic Tiger I was sitting in my car on Wilton Place in Dublin waiting for my then girlfriend to come out from her office. It was about 7pm, dark and cold, and I was expecting her to come out any minute so I left the heat and lights on. Five minutes into it and the door opens and I get ready to move off and lo and behold it's a woman I've never seen in me life. Sitting there. In the passenger seat in my car.

Me: "Eh, excus..,"

Her: "- Right, what can I do for you love?".

Me: "Sorry, I'm waiting for my girlfriend to come out. What are you doing sitting in my car?"

Her: "You want to be looked after?"

Me (dawning slowly): "No, sorry. I'm just waiting for somebody."

Her: "Ah here. You can't be leaving your lights on and engine running in this area. Don't be doing that again."

Me (after she closed the door, out loud, to myself): What the fúck just happened there?

leggo

During a time in my early-20's when I was only working casual hours and money was hard to come by, I got with a girl I probably wouldn't have to pass time (easy sex, I know I'm a horrible human, what are you gonna do?) I'd had enough a couple months in. The final straw was when she showed up 45 mins late for a Valentines Day date (massive pet peeve), saying she had a surprise for me, and the surprise was that she dyed her hair. Her hair looked rotten the new colour by the way. So I started plotting my way out because I knew her temperament would make that difficult.

After a couple of aborted break-up attempts (I'm bad at finishing - well I'm better now but learned the hard way - I always ended up feeling sorry for the person and giving them one more chance), I spotted she was avoiding me and tipped off a mate that she was trying to get close to my family because then she'd think I couldn't finish it. He thought I was crazy...until he saw for himself. She came around for a family function (as my guest with other friends), avoided me like the plague, then I bumped into my little sister (7, and easily attached) later as she informed me this girl had promised her the stars and the moon. I caught my Mam after, thinking she'd naively signed off on this, and she said "(Sister) told me what you guys planned with her, I think that's wonderful." I asked did she not agree to this and she said no, I told her I knew nothing of it, the sister told me her and this girl were going off alone for a day shopping and the cinema and so on. Pulled the ex aside and explained that, while I probably couldn't have her charged, it's not THAT far off attempted kidnapping and to back off. A couple of days later I did the deed, more bluntly than I'd generally like, over the phone.

She was tough to shake, like a bad rash. I'd take her off Facebook so she'd follow me on Twitter, that kinda thing. She got with someone I knew as revenge then would text me about how he wasn't like me at all.* I ignored texts until she called one night saying a friend of hers had died and she was having a tough time. Out of sympathy I took the call and was nice to her. Then she quickly segued into "PS I've been naked all this time...phone sex?" No, sorry, bye.

I've got worse. That was but my first tip-toe into the crazy carnival.

*Actually I just remembered nearly a year later she got with a new bloke and started texting telling me that she had. I wrote back eventually saying "Good. I'm happy for you." And got a reply saying "I'm happy too, happy to be getting the BEST SEX OF MY LIFE!!!!" Poor guy ended up having a kid with her while she was hammering me, and doubtless other lads from her past too, with constant attention-seeking texts. Phone companies used to make it way too difficult to block numbers.

catbear

^^^^^

Thank fook my awkward dating days were pre social media!!!

MRnotlob606

When she left me for the postman

dinorebel

MRnotlob606 wrote: »

When she left me for the postman

Did the delivery take 9 months?

Surreptitious

Thread resurgence!

This was quite some years ago. I met a chap online and we kept in contact a lot. One night in December I went to a hotel that had a band playing in their function room and booked in for the night. It was a fair drive and when I got there the place was dead so I asked at reception what time the band were playing and they told me it had been cancelled. There had been no update on this so I was pretty disappointed. I was all dolled up, bit of vodka on hand and ended up sitting in the hotel bar thinking what a waste this is. The guy texted me and I told him what had happened and after a good bit he decided he was going to drive to me so I'd have a bit of company. The roads were deadly, covered in ice and I said I didn't know if it was such a good idea but if he really wanted to then he might as well.
It took ages for him to get there and we went into the bar for a drink but they said it was too late to serve, looked for the residents bar which didn't seem to exist so we ended up going to my room. He went straight to the bathroom which didn't seem strange as he'd been driving for ages. Anyway with naught else to do we had a bit of fun. I asked him did he want to stay the night but he said he had work in about 6 hours and was going to drive all the way back. I was pretty annoyed with the guy but didn't say anything.
It was freezing cold so I lay in bed watching TV when all of a sudden I saw that he had left a long strong sh!t stain all along the width of the clean white crisp hotel linen. I thought I'd hurl and looked everywhere for replacement sheets but there were none in the room. I literally had to sleep all night in that bed disgusted with him. It was the most turned off I'd ever been in my life.
He texted me after asking when we were meeting again and I couldn't muster a reply. What a sh!t night that was.

DrPhilG

The fact that he decided to take a shyte in your hotel room bog instead of finding one in the lobby before heading up for some nookie is reason enough to ditch him.

Perhaps you should take it as a compliment that he was so keen to get back to you that he didn't bother wiping his hole?

DrPhilG

DrPhilG wrote: »

The fact that he decided to take a shyte in your hotel room bog instead of finding one in the lobby before heading up for some nookie is reason enough to ditch him.

Perhaps you should take it as a compliment that he was so keen to get back to you that he didn't bother wiping his hole?

Because nothing says 'I love you' more than skid marks on the sheets

mewe

Deleted User wrote:

Because nothing says 'I love you' more than skid marks on the sheets

All because the lady loved....cadburys milk tray

dinorebel

mewe wrote: »

All because the lady loved....cadburys milk tray

Hard or soft center?

flutered

if that was his personal hygine condition on a first meet upand shag in a hotel, imagne the condition of his own scratcher

DrPhilG

dinorebel wrote: »

Hard or soft center?

Spreadable.

kunst nugget

DrPhilG wrote: »

Spreadable.

Nut-ella?

midlandsmissus

RebelButtMunch wrote: »

She nipped out to the loo before the event. I wondered why. We did the deed. When I turned on the light the sheets were a lovely shade of pink.... I asked her and she admitted to taking out her tampon beforehand. Walked her home the next morning and left it at that.

You do know that women have periods, a lot?

Buckfast W

midlandsmissus wrote: »

You do know that women have periods, a lot?

Eh I think the problem was that she got it all over the bed knowing that it was that time of the month and didn't even drop a btw this might happen as a courtesy :eek:

midlandsmissus

Buckfast W wrote: »

midlandsmissus wrote: »

You do know that women have periods, a lot?

Eh I think the problem was that she got it all over the bed knowing that it was that time of the month and didn't even drop a btw this might happen as a courtesy :eek:

But you do know someimes it's hard to control a lot of blood. Accidents happen. If it happened to a girl staying in my house, I would know it was an accident, I wouldn't judge her, it's a normal bodily function. I would just clean the sheets!

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

midlandsmissus wrote: »

But you do know someimes it's hard to control a lot of blood. Accidents happen. If it happened to a girl staying in my house, I would know it was an accident, I wouldn't judge her, it's a normal bodily function. I would just clean the sheets!

Periods are a normal bodily function but a heads up to a sexual partner is still a very reasonable expectation. She wasn't just 'staying in' his house.

That said, I wouldn't be dumping anyone over it, she was probably on her last day and thought it'd be fine.

TerrorFirmer

The point is obviously that she knew it was that time of the month but went ahead with no warning given. To be honest, there's no justifying that in terms of a infamiliar encounter. I'm not saying I'd judge a woman on it, but I certainly think it should be mentioned beforehand as a matter of courtesy.

Because nothing says 'I love you' more than skid marks on the sheets

I have a friend who is (well, was, he's happily attached now) a real lady killer. Conversation one day.

Him - "You know when you're really drunk or hungover and you just couldn't be bothered to wipe your arse properly"?

Me - ".......what? No"

Him - "The girl I was with last night, she pulled down my pants to give me head, and even I could get the waft of it, can't even imagine what it was like for her"

Me - ".........."

Me - "Seen any good movies lately?"

midlandsmissus

Yes, periods can be very unexpected. I have at times been convinced mine was finished, and then it started up unexpectedly. I feel sorry for that girl.

BetsyEllen

TerrorFirmer wrote: »

I have a friend who is (well, was, he's happily attached now) a real lady killer. Conversation one day.

Him - "You know when you're really drunk or hungover and you just couldn't be bothered to wipe your arse properly"?

Me - ".......what? No"

Him - "The girl I was with last night, she pulled down my pants to give me head, and even I could get the waft of it, can't even imagine what it was like for her"

Me - ".........."

Me - "Seen any good movies lately?"

Oh God that made me feel sick haha! Yuck

On the period thing - yes it is a normal bodily function but it is not hard to mention that it might happen...honestly, even on the last day you just know there is a chance there could something there. I feel sorry for her but honestly, she would have known there was a chance she wasn't completely finished! Sex on the last day can always be a bit dodgy.
I can understand why the OP was a bit put off - however not taking the relationship any further because of it was a slight over reaction!

RebelButtMunch

midlandsmissus wrote: »

Yes, periods can be very unexpected. I have at times been convinced mine was finished, and then it started up unexpectedly. I feel sorry for that girl.

I dont disagree with you. In this case it wasn't unexpected.

blue note

I took a girl home for a one night stand before and she didn't mention she was on her period. I went down on her and thought she tasted a bit funny but didn't say anything. I was locked in fairness. But when I went to the bathroom after and saw my face covered in period I was fairly disgusted. My tummy and sheets were covered in it too.

If she had told me beforehand I'd have been happy to just take a bj. I didn't say anything to her. But I certainly didn't call her after either.

nuckeythompson

Last girl I was seeing told me she advised by her doctor that she was going through a menopause in her thirties for some reason or other ( I still struggle to understand the menstrual cycle). She has a kid and going through a divorce. I have kids and don't want any more. She understood this too.
Fast forward a couple of weeks, she is hammered and opens up she is trying to get pregnant with me and the above was lies. She even said she would have the baby and never tell me.......
Eject button!
I had to change my number after her too she was that bad, stalking me with fake pof profile etc.
Here's the creepy bit.
My phone kept crashing, a few months after I ejected, I gave it to a friend to fix. My phone had a spy app installed( I couldn't see it).
He told me it was purchased online and installed manually, the date was a night I spent in hers!
I've no idea how much info she got but it bloody scared the living **** out of me.
I've no pof, facebook or anything. Mate showed me on gmail that she had been logging on to my email as google stores that ****.
Pity her new victim. I haven't been with anyone else since, she really put the ****s up me

Buckfast W

blue note wrote: »

I took a girl home for a one night stand before and she didn't mention she was on her period. I went down on her and thought she tasted a bit funny but didn't say anything. I was locked in fairness. But when I went to the bathroom after and saw my face covered in period I was fairly disgusted. My tummy and sheets were covered in it too.

If she had told me beforehand I'd have been happy to just take a bj. I didn't say anything to her. But I certainly didn't call her after either.

I had a similar experience as yours though not as graphic, a heads up would have been nice, I could have put down a towel or something. Instead I was left with a bloody sheet and a stained mattress.

I did see the girl afterwards and she was morto. It was just one of those things. :pac:

optogirl

beggars_bush wrote: »

wow. just spotted this thread...


anyway went out on two dates with a girl a few years back I met
things went very well. I thought she was a lovely girl!
on second date we landed back to hers and had a great night. best night ever

on the third visit the condom we were using broke, unknown to both of us until after we had finished in bed
she said 'don't worry, has happened to me plenty of times in the past, I usually just go and get the morning after pill'

Left the next morning
Never called her back

I am so confused. What did she do wrong here?

whoopsadoodles

optogirl wrote: »

I am so confused. What did she do wrong here?

She wasn't a virgin :eek:

optogirl

blue note wrote: »

If she had told me beforehand I'd have been happy to just take a bj. .

Very good of you :P