Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

What was your biggest "get me out of here!" moment in a relationship?

1910111315

Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 50 ✭✭XavierBoThang


    I think you're confused, this is the "get out of here" thread, not the "definitely a keeper" thread.


    I bet he has cauliflower older than you in his top shelf :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 346 ✭✭reason vs religion


    I'm after looking back through 600 or so posts to find out what upset you and would like to take this moment to offer an apol.....

    Doorbell, pizzas here.

    :D

    I'm laughing at how obnoxious a person you are.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,008 ✭✭✭mad m


    s4uv3 wrote: »
    Yes please do ken.
    Thank you kindly :)

    Yay.....scary story....nut job.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    What was your biggest "get me out of here!" moment in a relationship?

    I was just driving down Leeson Street tonight and I remembered another fleeting relationship long confined to the nether regions of my cerebral cortex. It's very much a 'Get her out of here relationship', though. One winter night during the glory days of the Celtic Tiger I was sitting in my car on Wilton Place in Dublin waiting for my then girlfriend to come out from her office. It was about 7pm, dark and cold, and I was expecting her to come out any minute so I left the heat and lights on. Five minutes into it and the door opens and I get ready to move off and lo and behold it's a woman I've never seen in me life. Sitting there. In the passenger seat in my car.

    Me: "Eh, excus..,"

    Her: "- Right, what can I do for you love?".

    Me: "Sorry, I'm waiting for my girlfriend to come out. What are you doing sitting in my car?"

    Her: "You want to be looked after?"

    Me (dawning slowly): "No, sorry. I'm just waiting for somebody."

    Her: "Ah here. You can't be leaving your lights on and engine running in this area. Don't be doing that again."

    Me (after she closed the door, out loud, to myself): What the fúck just happened there?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,061 ✭✭✭leggo


    During a time in my early-20's when I was only working casual hours and money was hard to come by, I got with a girl I probably wouldn't have to pass time (easy sex, I know I'm a horrible human, what are you gonna do?) I'd had enough a couple months in. The final straw was when she showed up 45 mins late for a Valentines Day date (massive pet peeve), saying she had a surprise for me, and the surprise was that she dyed her hair. Her hair looked rotten the new colour by the way. So I started plotting my way out because I knew her temperament would make that difficult.

    After a couple of aborted break-up attempts (I'm bad at finishing - well I'm better now but learned the hard way - I always ended up feeling sorry for the person and giving them one more chance), I spotted she was avoiding me and tipped off a mate that she was trying to get close to my family because then she'd think I couldn't finish it. He thought I was crazy...until he saw for himself. She came around for a family function (as my guest with other friends), avoided me like the plague, then I bumped into my little sister (7, and easily attached) later as she informed me this girl had promised her the stars and the moon. I caught my Mam after, thinking she'd naively signed off on this, and she said "(Sister) told me what you guys planned with her, I think that's wonderful." I asked did she not agree to this and she said no, I told her I knew nothing of it, the sister told me her and this girl were going off alone for a day shopping and the cinema and so on. Pulled the ex aside and explained that, while I probably couldn't have her charged, it's not THAT far off attempted kidnapping and to back off. A couple of days later I did the deed, more bluntly than I'd generally like, over the phone.

    She was tough to shake, like a bad rash. I'd take her off Facebook so she'd follow me on Twitter, that kinda thing. She got with someone I knew as revenge then would text me about how he wasn't like me at all.* I ignored texts until she called one night saying a friend of hers had died and she was having a tough time. Out of sympathy I took the call and was nice to her. Then she quickly segued into "PS I've been naked all this time...phone sex?" No, sorry, bye.

    I've got worse. That was but my first tip-toe into the crazy carnival.

    *Actually I just remembered nearly a year later she got with a new bloke and started texting telling me that she had. I wrote back eventually saying "Good. I'm happy for you." And got a reply saying "I'm happy too, happy to be getting the BEST SEX OF MY LIFE!!!!" Poor guy ended up having a kid with her while she was hammering me, and doubtless other lads from her past too, with constant attention-seeking texts. Phone companies used to make it way too difficult to block numbers.


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,092 ✭✭✭catbear


    ^^^^^

    Thank fook my awkward dating days were pre social media!!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,642 ✭✭✭MRnotlob606


    When she left me for the postman


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,286 ✭✭✭dinorebel


    When she left me for the postman

    Did the delivery take 9 months?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,130 ✭✭✭Surreptitious


    Thread resurgence!

    This was quite some years ago. I met a chap online and we kept in contact a lot. One night in December I went to a hotel that had a band playing in their function room and booked in for the night. It was a fair drive and when I got there the place was dead so I asked at reception what time the band were playing and they told me it had been cancelled. There had been no update on this so I was pretty disappointed. I was all dolled up, bit of vodka on hand and ended up sitting in the hotel bar thinking what a waste this is. The guy texted me and I told him what had happened and after a good bit he decided he was going to drive to me so I'd have a bit of company. The roads were deadly, covered in ice and I said I didn't know if it was such a good idea but if he really wanted to then he might as well.
    It took ages for him to get there and we went into the bar for a drink but they said it was too late to serve, looked for the residents bar which didn't seem to exist so we ended up going to my room. He went straight to the bathroom which didn't seem strange as he'd been driving for ages. Anyway with naught else to do we had a bit of fun. I asked him did he want to stay the night but he said he had work in about 6 hours and was going to drive all the way back. I was pretty annoyed with the guy but didn't say anything.
    It was freezing cold so I lay in bed watching TV when all of a sudden I saw that he had left a long strong sh!t stain all along the width of the clean white crisp hotel linen. I thought I'd hurl and looked everywhere for replacement sheets but there were none in the room. I literally had to sleep all night in that bed disgusted with him. It was the most turned off I'd ever been in my life.
    He texted me after asking when we were meeting again and I couldn't muster a reply. What a sh!t night that was.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,505 ✭✭✭✭DrPhilG


    The fact that he decided to take a shyte in your hotel room bog instead of finding one in the lobby before heading up for some nookie is reason enough to ditch him.

    Perhaps you should take it as a compliment that he was so keen to get back to you that he didn't bother wiping his hole?


  • Advertisement
  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    DrPhilG wrote: »
    The fact that he decided to take a shyte in your hotel room bog instead of finding one in the lobby before heading up for some nookie is reason enough to ditch him.

    Perhaps you should take it as a compliment that he was so keen to get back to you that he didn't bother wiping his hole?

    Because nothing says 'I love you' more than skid marks on the sheets


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,557 ✭✭✭mewe


    Because nothing says 'I love you' more than skid marks on the sheets


    All because the lady loved....cadburys milk tray


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,286 ✭✭✭dinorebel


    mewe wrote: »
    All because the lady loved....cadburys milk tray

    Hard or soft center?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,707 ✭✭✭flutered


    if that was his personal hygine condition on a first meet upand shag in a hotel, imagne the condition of his own scratcher


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,505 ✭✭✭✭DrPhilG


    dinorebel wrote: »
    Hard or soft center?

    Spreadable.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,375 ✭✭✭✭kunst nugget


    DrPhilG wrote: »
    Spreadable.

    Nut-ella?


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    She nipped out to the loo before the event. I wondered why. We did the deed. When I turned on the light the sheets were a lovely shade of pink.... I asked her and she admitted to taking out her tampon beforehand. Walked her home the next morning and left it at that.
    You do know that women have periods, a lot?


  • Registered Users Posts: 571 ✭✭✭Buckfast W


    You do know that women have periods, a lot?
    Eh I think the problem was that she got it all over the bed knowing that it was that time of the month and didn't even drop a btw this might happen as a courtesy :eek:


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    Buckfast W wrote: »
    You do know that women have periods, a lot?
    Eh I think the problem was that she got it all over the bed knowing that it was that time of the month and didn't even drop a btw this might happen as a courtesy :eek:

    But you do know someimes it's hard to control a lot of blood. Accidents happen. If it happened to a girl staying in my house, I would know it was an accident, I wouldn't judge her, it's a normal bodily function. I would just clean the sheets!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,070 ✭✭✭✭pq0n1ct4ve8zf5


    But you do know someimes it's hard to control a lot of blood. Accidents happen. If it happened to a girl staying in my house, I would know it was an accident, I wouldn't judge her, it's a normal bodily function. I would just clean the sheets!

    Periods are a normal bodily function but a heads up to a sexual partner is still a very reasonable expectation. She wasn't just 'staying in' his house.

    That said, I wouldn't be dumping anyone over it, she was probably on her last day and thought it'd be fine.


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭TerrorFirmer


    The point is obviously that she knew it was that time of the month but went ahead with no warning given. To be honest, there's no justifying that in terms of a infamiliar encounter. I'm not saying I'd judge a woman on it, but I certainly think it should be mentioned beforehand as a matter of courtesy.
    Because nothing says 'I love you' more than skid marks on the sheets

    I have a friend who is (well, was, he's happily attached now) a real lady killer. Conversation one day.

    Him - "You know when you're really drunk or hungover and you just couldn't be bothered to wipe your arse properly"?

    Me - ".......what? No"

    Him - "The girl I was with last night, she pulled down my pants to give me head, and even I could get the waft of it, can't even imagine what it was like for her"

    Me - ".........."

    Me - "Seen any good movies lately?"


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    Yes, periods can be very unexpected. I have at times been convinced mine was finished, and then it started up unexpectedly. I feel sorry for that girl.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,360 ✭✭✭BetsyEllen


    I have a friend who is (well, was, he's happily attached now) a real lady killer. Conversation one day.

    Him - "You know when you're really drunk or hungover and you just couldn't be bothered to wipe your arse properly"?

    Me - ".......what? No"

    Him - "The girl I was with last night, she pulled down my pants to give me head, and even I could get the waft of it, can't even imagine what it was like for her"

    Me - ".........."

    Me - "Seen any good movies lately?"

    Oh God that made me feel sick haha! Yuck

    On the period thing - yes it is a normal bodily function but it is not hard to mention that it might happen...honestly, even on the last day you just know there is a chance there could something there. I feel sorry for her but honestly, she would have known there was a chance she wasn't completely finished! Sex on the last day can always be a bit dodgy.
    I can understand why the OP was a bit put off - however not taking the relationship any further because of it was a slight over reaction!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,385 ✭✭✭RebelButtMunch


    Yes, periods can be very unexpected. I have at times been convinced mine was finished, and then it started up unexpectedly. I feel sorry for that girl.

    I dont disagree with you. In this case it wasn't unexpected.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,609 ✭✭✭blue note


    I took a girl home for a one night stand before and she didn't mention she was on her period. I went down on her and thought she tasted a bit funny but didn't say anything. I was locked in fairness. But when I went to the bathroom after and saw my face covered in period I was fairly disgusted. My tummy and sheets were covered in it too.

    If she had told me beforehand I'd have been happy to just take a bj. I didn't say anything to her. But I certainly didn't call her after either.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 939 ✭✭✭nuckeythompson


    Last girl I was seeing told me she advised by her doctor that she was going through a menopause in her thirties for some reason or other ( I still struggle to understand the menstrual cycle). She has a kid and going through a divorce. I have kids and don't want any more. She understood this too.
    Fast forward a couple of weeks, she is hammered and opens up she is trying to get pregnant with me and the above was lies. She even said she would have the baby and never tell me.......
    Eject button!
    I had to change my number after her too she was that bad, stalking me with fake pof profile etc.
    Here's the creepy bit.
    My phone kept crashing, a few months after I ejected, I gave it to a friend to fix. My phone had a spy app installed( I couldn't see it).
    He told me it was purchased online and installed manually, the date was a night I spent in hers!
    I've no idea how much info she got but it bloody scared the living **** out of me.
    I've no pof, facebook or anything. Mate showed me on gmail that she had been logging on to my email as google stores that ****.
    Pity her new victim. I haven't been with anyone else since, she really put the ****s up me


  • Registered Users Posts: 571 ✭✭✭Buckfast W


    blue note wrote: »
    I took a girl home for a one night stand before and she didn't mention she was on her period. I went down on her and thought she tasted a bit funny but didn't say anything. I was locked in fairness. But when I went to the bathroom after and saw my face covered in period I was fairly disgusted. My tummy and sheets were covered in it too.

    If she had told me beforehand I'd have been happy to just take a bj. I didn't say anything to her. But I certainly didn't call her after either.

    I had a similar experience as yours though not as graphic, a heads up would have been nice, I could have put down a towel or something. Instead I was left with a bloody sheet and a stained mattress.

    I did see the girl afterwards and she was morto. It was just one of those things. :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,015 ✭✭✭optogirl


    wow. just spotted this thread...


    anyway went out on two dates with a girl a few years back I met
    things went very well. I thought she was a lovely girl!
    on second date we landed back to hers and had a great night. best night ever

    on the third visit the condom we were using broke, unknown to both of us until after we had finished in bed
    she said 'don't worry, has happened to me plenty of times in the past, I usually just go and get the morning after pill'

    Left the next morning
    Never called her back


    I am so confused. What did she do wrong here?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,058 ✭✭✭whoopsadoodles


    optogirl wrote: »
    I am so confused. What did she do wrong here?

    She wasn't a virgin :eek:


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,015 ✭✭✭optogirl


    blue note wrote: »

    If she had told me beforehand I'd have been happy to just take a bj. .

    Very good of you :P


  • Registered Users Posts: 571 ✭✭✭Buckfast W


    She wasn't a virgin :eek:

    Something like this should sort out that Hussy :D

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5au73E60DZw


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,609 ✭✭✭blue note


    I think the problem with the condom breaking story is that she reacted like it was a common occurance. I've had one break on me in 12 years - the very first time I had sex and that was because I didn't know how to put it on right. In the 12 years since they've all worked. So why is it a common occurance for her?

    She was probably just being nice and reassuring the guy that she'd go and get the pill and it in fact was not a regular occurrence for her. But, I can understand someone thinking if condoms breaking are normal for her how blasé is she about sexual safety? And not wanting to take any risk with her again.

    People were very harsh on that poster for essentially not wanting to take any risks in sleeping with someone who he had reason to believe was not careful with protection.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭TerrorFirmer


    Maybe she has a lot of sex - be it one night stands, flings or boyfriend - and the odds of broken condom incidents are more likely. It hardly reflects on her attitude towards sexual safety unless she's somehow using her vaginal muscles to deliberately break condoms :confused:

    Condoms breaking are outside a woman's control entirely.

    I don't think there's any way around the fact that the guy who posted that was just put off by the fact that she might have a very active (though seemingly safe) sex life.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 37,314 ✭✭✭✭the_syco


    If that were true, that'd be an awfully cruel thing to highlight, wouldn't it?
    Forever alone is a meme...
    I feel sorry for that girl.
    If the room was rented, the replacement mattress would be coming out of his deposit because she didn't bother telling him what she knew had a high chance of happening.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,058 ✭✭✭whoopsadoodles


    Maybe she has a lot of sex - be it one night stands, flings or boyfriend - and the odds of broken condom incidents are more likely. It hardly reflects on her attitude towards sexual safety unless she's somehow using her vaginal muscles to deliberately break condoms :confused:

    Condoms breaking are outside a woman's control entirely.

    I don't think there's any way around the fact that the guy who posted that was just put off by the fact that she might have a very active (though seemingly safe) sex life.

    Maybe she had a jaggedy vageegee.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 4,609 ✭✭✭blue note


    Condoms breaking commonly is not normal. Generally outside of the woman's control unless she likes putting them on and doesn't know how to do it properly or is doing something during sex that is causing them to break - I don't know, she gives toothy oral sex our something. But it's definitely but normal.

    It sounds odd to me that it would regularly be happening to a girl. I can understand a guy getting spooked by that. And I certainly read it as him being spooked because a condom breaking was normal and nothing to worry about, not because she was promiscuious.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,058 ✭✭✭whoopsadoodles


    Maybe her long term ex just had a VERY BIG PENIS and used to bust out of them all the time.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,839 ✭✭✭Walter H Price


    When she told me she never wanted to get a job , after dropping out of college

    Her plan was the dole then eventually become a stay at home mum ... i was like not to my kids anyway, we'd a big row and ended it on the spot


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭TerrorFirmer


    It's entirely normal if you have a very active sex life and always use condoms, versus someone who only needs to use a condom once or twice a year. in which cases a condom breaking would be unusual/unlikely.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,609 ✭✭✭blue note


    Yes, it's possible that the ex had a horse sized wang and wasn't able to find condoms big enough. Very unlikely though. I think by far the most likely story is that she was just trying to reassure the poster and it wasn't a common occurrence for her.

    But, one possibility is that she is careless with protection and not bothered about it failing. Which would worry a lot of people.

    It's interesting that everyone is attacking the poster over this. I can't help but think if the genders were reversed that no-one would question a girl who ran from a guy who regularly had condoms break on him. I'd certainly be suspicious of that anyway.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,481 ✭✭✭robbiezero


    blue note wrote: »
    Condoms breaking commonly is not normal. Generally outside of the woman's control unless she likes putting them on and doesn't know how to do it properly or is doing something during sex that is causing them to break - I don't know, she gives toothy oral sex our something. But it's definitely but normal.

    It sounds odd to me that it would regularly be happening to a girl. I can understand a guy getting spooked by that. And I certainly read it as him being spooked because a condom breaking was normal and nothing to worry about, not because she was promiscuious.

    So what if he was spooked because of that?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭TerrorFirmer


    blue note wrote: »
    But, one possibility is that she is careless with protection and not bothered about it failing. Which would worry a lot of people.

    How does that make any sense? The condom breaks, neither notices, but she's the one who's somehow careless with protection and not bothered?


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,609 ✭✭✭blue note


    If he was spooked because she was promiscuous he should kick himself in the nuts because he'd just slept with someone on the second date and shouldn't have such double standards. but it didn't read like that was what happened in my opinion.

    I think people just jumped on the chance to be outraged at someone slut shaming a woman and didn't actually think about whether he actually was or not.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,713 ✭✭✭✭osarusan


    The whole thing was discussed when they originally made the post 2 months ago, and they responded:
    nope
    I just wasn't quite sure that I wanted to be going out someone quite as promiscuous as she seemed to be.

    she was excellent in bed though, to be fair.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,077 ✭✭✭✭GBX


    I've spent the morning reading this whole thread ... all I can say is wow! I have sat in shock, spewed coffee on a few occasions. Thanks folks for going through all of this. Great reading/entertainment!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 681 ✭✭✭Mr. FoggPatches


    Periods are a normal bodily function but a heads up to a sexual partner is still a very reasonable expectation. She wasn't just 'staying in' his house.

    That said, I wouldn't be dumping anyone over it, she was probably on her last day and thought it'd be fine.
    Nothing kills the mood more than a quick 'heads up' in the midst of a passionate clinch.
    That said, I wouldn't have been bothered by it at all.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,609 ✭✭✭blue note


    How does that make any sense? The condom breaks, neither notices, but she's the one who's somehow careless with protection and not bothered?

    Because she made out like it was a regular occurrence. It can happen to anyone a few times, but for it to be a regular occurrence someone is doing something wrong. If it was a past partner, you'd expect they'd have figured it out and not had it happen commonly. If it was a few different partners than it sounds very odd that so many of them would have such difficulty putting one on. So she's the common denominator and maybe she's doing something wrong? Maybe wearing a sharp ring in bed or something, or pulling on it too hard or something? I don't know, I can't really think why they'd break regularly.

    And for most people you'd be fairly worried after that happens - but from the post she didn't seem overly bothered. I can see why that would concern someone.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,070 ✭✭✭✭pq0n1ct4ve8zf5


    blue note wrote: »
    Yes, it's possible that the ex had a horse sized wang and wasn't able to find condoms big enough. Very unlikely though. I think by far the most likely story is that she was just trying to reassure the poster and it wasn't a common occurrence for her.

    But, one possibility is that she is careless with protection and not bothered about it failing. Which would worry a lot of people.

    It's interesting that everyone is attacking the poster over this. I can't help but think if the genders were reversed that no-one would question a girl who ran from a guy who regularly had condoms break on him. I'd certainly be suspicious of that anyway.

    You're making a far bigger deal of it than anyone else is tbh. There were a couple of what I thought were clearly light hearted comments and then an out of nowhere accusation that 'everyone is attacking the poster'.

    If I had a penny for every thread I've seen ruined on here because someone just can't help but opine on a completely hypothetical made up if-the-genders-were-reversed situation I'd be rich


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,609 ✭✭✭blue note


    osarusan wrote: »
    The whole thing was discussed when they originally made the post 2 months ago, and they responded:

    Haha :D I clearly gave the guy too much credit! :D:D Turns out he's just a bit of a kn0b!


  • Moderators, Music Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,734 Mod ✭✭✭✭Boom_Bap


    Can we move past this dude with the massive shlong and the breaking condom now please.


  • Advertisement
Advertisement