Is Marriage to much of a risk ?

Jim Bob Scratcher

Me personally can never see myself tying the knot. How about you good folks of after after hours ?

9or10

Jim Bob Scratcher wrote: »

Me personally can never see myself tying the knot. How about you good folks of after after hours ?

People talk about romance and shoite, but marriage is really just an each way bet on who changes the others diapers.

How else will you afford the home carer when you get old?

The_Valeyard

Everything's a risk. Especially playing that boardgame,





















Mousetrap

Barry Badrinath

Quantify "risk".

Ulysses Gaze

9or10 wrote: »

People talk about romance and shoite, but marriage is really just an each way bet on who changes the others diapers.

How else will you afford the home carer when you get old?

Murder-Suicide Pact would solve that problem.

:pac::D

Ted111

Senor Fancy Pants wrote: »

Quantify "risk".

12.

CINCLANTFLT

Ted111 wrote: »

12.

20% and rising...

Cee-Jay-Cee

I was the same as you OP, I was a committed lifelong single person and even when going out with girls who I really liked, as soon as they even hinted at anything more permanent, I was out of there. But then I met a girl that I didn't want to lose, we got married and have two beautiful little girls. Yeah it may have been a risk but it was worth it and I wouldn't change my life for anything now.

baldbear

Too

Oodoov

Don't ever go swinging OP that's all im saying.

Jim Bob Scratcher

baldbear wrote: »

Too

Anything else to contribute ? you grammar nazi!

Ayuntamiento

Marriage is the best thing I ever did. I'm incredibly happy that I get to spend the rest of my life with this incredible person. Maybe I got lucky though.

stimpson

There's only two reasons to get married. For love and for money.


Just make sure you do it the right way round.

Jim Bob Scratcher

Ayuntamiento wrote: »

Marriage is the best thing I ever did. I'm incredibly happy that I get to spend the rest of my life with this incredible person. Maybe I got lucky though.

What if it all go's tits up in a few years time ?

Jim Bob Scratcher

Jim Bob Scratcher wrote: »

What if it all go's tits up in a few years time ?

This is a very real possibility. Married or not married the relationship can still run in to difficulty and both can still decide to part ways.
For me marriage is something I rarely think about. When I do it's a bit "yeah maybe I would" or "no I'm good"

I do wonder what it must feel like to be with the same person for years and years. That's an awful lot of sexual positions to keep things interesting.

Ayuntamiento

Jim Bob Scratcher wrote: »

What if it all go's tits up in a few years time ?

Even if that did happen, I wouldn't regret one second of our marriage. It has brought me so much happiness.
I think you haven't met the right person yet. When you meet that person it's all so simple. Marriage isn't a decision that you agonise over.
The only thing that upsets me is knowing that we only have a finite amount of time together and one day we'll lose each other.

ToddyDoody

Jim Bob Scratcher wrote: »

What if it all go's tits up in a few years time ?

Were your parents married?

thunderdog

I work in risk and I also happen to getting married on sat. Marriage isn't too risky as long as you hedge

pragmatic1

Can't see myself getting married although it's a nice idea. I think that human relationships, outside of family, have time limits.

Dr Crayfish

Deleted User wrote: »

I do wonder what it must feel like to be with the same person for years and years. That's an awful lot of sexual positions to keep things interesting.

I think there's way more to it than that. When I look at my parents who've been together 40 odd years, I have so much respect for them and I think it's beautiful. They've a great life now and whatever it is they have, it works.
I don't think I was cut out for that life however! I've had a couple of scrapes with marriage but at this stage in my life it's something I'm pretty sure I'd never do again. Which makes it difficult to meet someone, it seems most girls my age are still waiting for a Prince Charming to come along for a big white wedding, which is my worst nightmare!
I still think it's worth the risk, if you and your beloved are 100% sure it's what you both want

Four Phucs Ache

I had a great single life then met a girl that knocked me for six.Couldnt believe she had any interest in me. Married her.

12 years later:

I'm now a 3rd child and the only risk there is comes in the form of me deciding whether to shove the chocolate wrappers and crisp packets under the couch or leave them on the coffee table.

Richard Hillman

It is absolutely stone wall crazy for any man to marry a woman. You are signing away most of your savings and a chunk of your future earnings just to 'secure' one woman. It makes no sense.

Dr Crayfish

Dr Crayfish wrote: »

I think there's way more to it than that. When I look at my parents who've been together 40 odd years, I have so much respect for them and I think it's beautiful. They've a great life now and whatever it is they have, it works.
I don't think I was cut out for that life however! I've had a couple of scrapes with marriage but at this stage in my life it's something I'm pretty sure I'd never do again. Which makes it difficult to meet someone, it seems most girls my age are still waiting for a Prince Charming to come along for a big white wedding, which is my worst nightmare!
I still think it's worth the risk, if you and your beloved are 100% sure it's what you both want

Of course there is. I was being a bit tongue in cheek. Like you a big white wedding is not something I want and I don't believe in Prince Charming. That's the thing, I don't believe in 'oh you haven't met the right person'. Marriage is for some people and it's not for others.

mfceiling

Richard Hillman wrote: »

It is absolutely stone wall crazy for any man to marry a woman. You are signing away most of your savings and a chunk of your future earnings just to 'secure' one woman. It makes no sense.

Not if you have fcuk all.


You can't take knickers off a bare arse.

Junkyard Tom

Have you considering using Internet Relationship Providings?

Ayuntamiento

pragmatic1 wrote: »

Can't see myself getting married although it's a nice idea. I think that human relationships, outside of family, have time limits.

But why do family relationships not have a time limit? Because you accept your family for who they are and try to love them unconditionally.
I don't see why the same idea can't be applied to marriage.

Goya

Oh I definitely believe the right person - i.e. someone they are stone mad about - can make a person previously disinterested in marriage want to carry out the ritual that will make them officially family.

I do think those who are extra set against marriage definitely have not met a person whom they are crazy about... If they do, the "I'd never ever marry - it's a risk" stuff would be out the window.

And that doesn't have to mean a white wedding either - could be just them and witnesses in a registry office.

Ursus Horribilis

Bear in mind that the co-habitation laws have changed here. Even if you never tie the knot, a lot of legal stuff kicks in after 5 years (3 if you've children). The most ominous one being property rights...

ChikiChiki

Seriously does anyone else think that staying with one person for 40+ years is not normal or is it just me. I think in the confines of marriage we should be allowed stray outside every so often. That's just my opinion.

Flimpson

Flimpson wrote: »

Oh I definitely believe the right person - i.e. someone they are stone mad about - can make a person previously disinterested in marriage want to carry out the ritual that will make them officially family.

I do think those who are extra set against marriage definitely have not met a person whom they are crazy about... If they do, the "I'd never ever marry - it's a risk" stuff would be out the window.

And that doesn't have to mean a white wedding either - could be just them and witnesses in a registry office.

Why do you assume that?

bee06

Jim Bob Scratcher wrote: »

What if it all go's tits up in a few years time ?

What if it didn't?

I'd prefer to regret the things I did rather than the things I'd wished I'd done.

For me, marriage was the obvious thing to do from a legal standpoint, a financial standpoint (tax benefits) and at the end of the day, he's the only man I've ever loved and my life would be crappy without him.

Ayuntamiento

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Of course there is. I was being a bit tongue in cheek. Like you a big white wedding is not something I want and I don't believe in Prince Charming. That's the thing, I don't believe in 'oh you haven't met the right person'. Marriage is for some people and it's not for others.

The concept of marriage is committing to love somebody, be loyal to them, support them no matter what, have fun with them, share their life adventures, celebrate their successes, console them in their failures.
What kind of person wouldn't want that in their life?

Colser

ChikiChiki wrote:

Seriously does anyone else think that staying with one person for 40+ years is not normal or is it just me. I think in the confines of marriage we should be allowed stray outside every so often. That's just my opinion.

Doesn't that defeat the point of marriage though..why marry someone if you want to stray?

I'm a total cynic where marriage/cohabiting is concerned..too easy to get into and ridiculously difficult to get out of imo.

Barry Badrinath

Ayuntamiento wrote: »

The concept of marriage is committing to love somebody, be loyal to them, support them no matter what, have fun with them, share their life adventures, celebrate their successes, console them in their failures.
What kind of person wouldn't want that in their life?

You can do that without marriage.

Temptamperu

As a pretend jedi im not allowed get married.

Tauriel

Ayuntamiento wrote: »

The concept of marriage is committing to love somebody, be loyal to them, support them no matter what, have fun with them, share their life adventures, celebrate their successes, console them in their failures.
What kind of person wouldn't want that in their life?

Someone who doesn't want to be a caregiver for the rest of their life

Ayuntamiento

Ayuntamiento wrote: »

The concept of marriage is committing to love somebody, be loyal to them, support them no matter what, have fun with them, share their life adventures, celebrate their successes, console them in their failures.
What kind of person wouldn't want that in their life?

Somebody who believes they can have that without needing to sign a piece of paper. To be honest I do understand why it's important to some people. We are all different. It's not for me to say "oh would you be bothered getting married". It's just not something I feel is necessary for me.

Edited to add that there is a huge emotional risk in committing to a relationship. If all you've ever known is heartache and loss then chances are you will be slow to open yourself up to what you describe.

pragmatic1

Ayuntamiento wrote: »

But why do family relationships not have a time limit? Because you accept your family for who they are and try to love them unconditionally.
I don't see why the same idea can't be applied to marriage.

It's the DNA. It's an animal instinct thing with family. Even nieces and nephews, I'd put myself in danger for their well being. Which logically doesn't make much sense as I have interactions with friends on a much more regular basis.

dd972

Jim Bob Scratcher wrote: »

Me personally can never see myself tying the knot. How about you good folks of after after hours ?

What OP?, are you telling us that you can't find some stranger whom you've got a stronger bond with than your parents, siblings or closet friends? This is the easiest thing to do in the world, what's wrong with you?!!!:eek:

(That was from the perspective of the married smuggo's), another poster on boards got it in one when they said that the most successful and long lasting marriages are between a couple of c**ts who form a pact for getting what they want out of life and screwing people people over.

Dr Crayfish

Ayuntamiento wrote: »

The concept of marriage is committing to love somebody, be loyal to them, support them no matter what, have fun with them, share their life adventures, celebrate their successes, console them in their failures.
What kind of person wouldn't want that in their life?

Well, me! Maybe I'll change over time, but right now, having someone all up in my grill all the time sounds like hell to me. I don't particularly need anyone, I have plenty of friends and things to keep me busy. I am content the way things are!

Temptamperu

Dr Crayfish wrote: »

Well, me! Maybe I'll change over time, but right now, having someone all up in my grill all the time sounds like hell to me. I don't particularly need anyone, I have plenty of friends and things to keep me busy. I am content the way things are!

they dont let you play video games either... Bunch of C**TS :pac:

John_Rambo

Thankfully child marriage is illegal in Ireland. You're safe for now.

Ayuntamiento

Well it works for me and I was just trying to give my perspective. I'm obviously much too smug and happy for some of the people on this thread! I can tell some of you have been badly burned before.
Do what you want as long as it makes you happy!

Pac1Man

I couldn't do the typical wedding day. All that attention would freak me out. Plus pissing away the guts of 20k for it too! Insane.

ChikiChiki

Pac1Man wrote: »

I couldn't do the typical wedding day. All that attention would freak me out. Plus pissing away the guts of 20k for it too! Insane.

Know a lad that spent 30k (some saved, some borrowed) on his wedding and she did the dirty on him 7 months later.

Pac1Man

ChikiChiki wrote: »

Know a lad that spent 30k (some saved, some borrowed) on his wedding and she did the dirty on him 7 months later.

Sweet Jesus! The borrowed bit suprises me the most about that example, whatever about spending your own money.

If I was to ever do it, it would be for the legal advantages and the process would be completed as such. Into an office, couple of witnesses, sign the document, home before lunch.

saintsaltynuts

Don't Do It.

misstearheus

This has made me wonder now if there's many out there that have only ever slept with the guy they married... Don't think I'd like that somehow. Miss out experiencing different guys big time! But I guess they mightn't see it like that if they're happy out with just one guy.

9or10

bee06 wrote: »

For me, marriage was the obvious thing to do from a legal standpoint, a financial standpoint (tax benefits) and at the end of the day, he's the only man I've ever loved and my life would be crappy without him.

Is that you Bridie? Never knew ye had a Boards a/c

Dr Crayfish

misstearheus wrote: »

This has made me wonder now if there's many out there that have only ever slept with the guy they married... Don't think I'd like that somehow. Miss out experiencing different guys big time! But I guess they mightn't see it like that if they're happy out with just one guy.

It's different now, in my parents day I think most people weren't concerned with sleeping around and trying different sexual partners. Financial stability and having kids seemed to be more important.
We're in a golden age right now of having tonnes of money and choices, at least in this part of the world. I wonder would attitudes to relationships and sex change if we became dirt poor again with little possessions or consumer culture, like it was say 60 years ago? Would people just be glad to have somebody, anybody, to take care of them and to get through their miserable existences with? Too preoccupied by day to day challenges without worrying about not having had enough sex with enough people?

ChippingSodbury

Jim Bob Scratcher wrote: »

What if it all go's tits up in a few years time ?

"Isn't it better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all"
Tennyson (I think he played for Kilkenny in the 2000's)