Hard to handle life right now.

steddyeddy

My deepest condolences Bear. I wish you and your wife a better hand than you have been dealt now

volchitsa

All my sympathy Bear. And, though it may not feel like it now, it will get better.
But first give yourselves the time and space it takes to get through this.

(You don't have to answer this if you don't feel like it, but I'm wondering how your work have been about everything recently? Have they been understanding about it or not?)

mansize

My deepest sympathies to you and your family. My sister miscarried on New Year's Eve a few years back after telling us all the wonderful news at Xmas dinner earlier that month. I'm aware of the harshness of the time but cannot fathom how difficult it must be for your family

Hope you get through it with the strength and support of those arround you

cbyrd

My sincere sympathies to you and your family Bear, there but for the Grace of God...
Take care of yourselves. xx

Glass fused light

Bear1, so sorry to hear about you and your wife's loss.

I know that you will be offered support but the attached pdf's are for reference.
Booklet: You are not alone
It's witten for people coping after a suicide death but pages 12 & 13 "Suggestions for the bereaved" are imo worth sticking up on the fridge.
And Directory of Bereavement Support Services 2016

robarmstrong

So sorry to hear about your loss mate. Myself and the missus only suffered a miscarriage a few weeks ago, first she lost her father, her waters broke and we were told that our little Robbie wasn't going to make it through the night.

He lasted three days before his little heart stopped beating. I know how powerless and helpless it feels but let me tell you something, it brings you closer, it's a horrible thing to say but it'll make you stronger and closer as a couple. I hope you have happy and healthy children and wish nothing but the best for you and your other half.

If you need anything give me a shout via PM, I know how you're feeling because to be honest I feel the same but I'm trying my best to keep strong and stay strong for myself and herself.

jennyhayes123

Sending love to you and your wife x x

indioblack

Just came upon this thread.
I feel sorrow for your loss.
I hope the posts here from everyone offer some comfort.

indioblack

Just came upon this thread.
I feel sorrow for your loss.
I hope the posts here from everyone offer some comfort.

volchitsa

robarmstrong wrote: »

So sorry to hear about your loss mate. Myself and the missus only suffered a miscarriage a few weeks ago, first she lost her father, her waters broke and we were told that our little Robbie wasn't going to make it through the night.

He lasted three days before his little heart stopped beating. I know how powerless and helpless it feels but let me tell you something, it brings you closer, it's a horrible thing to say but it'll make you stronger and closer as a couple. I hope you have happy and healthy children and wish nothing but the best for you and your other half.

If you need anything give me a shout via PM, I know how you're feeling because to be honest I feel the same but I'm trying my best to keep strong and stay strong for myself and herself.

I just wanted to send you my sympathies and best wishes as well, robarmstrong.

Stheno

volchitsa wrote: »

I just wanted to send you my sympathies and best wishes as well, robarmstrong.

And mine to both bear and Rob and their families.

Thoughts for you all

Stheno

volchitsa wrote: »

I just wanted to send you my sympathies and best wishes as well, robarmstrong.

And mine to both bear and Rob and their families.

Thoughts for you all

JohnRock

I'm sorry to hear about your situation and I hope things get better for you and your family.

Delphinium

So sorry to see this news. There will always be a part of your heart and mind which will hold this baby close and an empty feeling which will fade but never disappear. Accept the loss of the future your family might have had and give yourselves plenty of time to mourn your loss. Be kind to yourselves and support each other.

Specialun

So sorry to hear the news bear. I cannot understand what you or mrs bear are going through. To all you're just an anonymous poster in cyberspace but i can 100% guarantee there are posters here that are willing to help and tell you their story. God bless you bear family

bear1

Thank you everyone and I'm sending minibear ano Robarmstrong my best for your losses as well. I feel your pain.
On Friday the baby had its labour induced.. I can't describe how that felt nor will I.
I wish it upon no one.
My wife luckily suffered no pain afterwards apart from emotional pain so I'm grateful at least for that.
The baby turned out to be a boy which as a father made me feel worse so it gave me a big kick to find that out.
We've decided to name him Jack and as tomorrow we are collecting the body for burial I decided to buy him a toy as it's the only gift his father will give him.
Bought him a toy ferrari and wrote a little note on it which will be placed in the coffin.
Bought a second identical one which I'll keep with me.
Things are hard but we have our moments of course and I know this week will be the worst of our lives.
Here's to hope.

Bear, I'm so sorry for all you've suffered. Look after each other, and yourself.

I'll be thinking of you this week.

idnkph

Sorry for your troubles OP. I have someone close to me that went through something similar. It's totally devastating but it gets easier. You will learn how to cope with this.I Wish you and yours all the best for the future.

yermandan

ah man. RIP little Jack. So much love to you and your wife during this bro.

gifted

Reading posts like this makes me realise what is important. My deepest sympathies to you both.

Xaracatz

Oh bear1 - I'm so sorry.

I read your first post a while ago, but I didn't follow the thread as it's a little close to my heart. I was thinking about you though, and then saw your post on another thread where you said what happened.

I've read through now and you've been amazing in your posts and there are a lot of people here who care. Like you said, this week will be the worst, but it will get better, and better. I promise you.

Wishing you and your wife and your children - and your future children(!) all the very best - and a virtual hug.

cbyrd

Rest in peace little Jack,

minibear

bear1 I am so sorry.

For as long as necessary you need to just focus on your little family now. Do whatever it takes to get through the coming days and months. Christmas will be difficult and you might wonder about "celebrating" it this year. Personally I went ahead and decorated the house as much as ever. It somehow brought me a sense of peace. You might like to buy a special little bauble for the tree, to remember Jack. I do this each year. What a lovely idea of buying the sports car.

I know things are so brutally raw for you now and you are probably just getting through each day but I promise you that the pain will get easier to bear.

If there are any follow up appointments at the hospital or at a health centre you might want to arrange to be seen as quickly as possible. Rather than having to sit surrounded by mothers and babies because I remember I couldn't even look at a little baby for a long time.it just broke my heart. Also, when we had to go to register our sons death I rang ahead and we were seen quickly and dealt with efficiently, with sympathy and understanding. Don't forget to look up A Little Lifetime parents forum, you will be made very welcome there.

minibear

mansize

RIP Jack Bear

pure.conya

RIP Jack

MrJones1973

i just came across this thread. My heart goes out to you. The only comfort is that even when in the womb the child was loved. And you will continue to cherish the memory of his life.

Summer wind

Hi Bear1 I'm sitting here in my kitchen thinking of you and your wife and family at little baby Jacks funeral today. I'm so sorry to hear that your beautiful little baby Jack has died. Life can be so cruel and I'm so sorry for all you and your wife have been through. May little baby Jack Rest In Peace.

Lisha

RIP Jack.

To you and your wife and family Bear all I can offer you is my best wishes and I wish you peace.

It is a very tough loss to get through. Family members suffered such a loss (of twins at 22weeks in pregnancy) someyears ago. As a family we try and mention those babies names as easily as we do all our nieces and nephews.
My own children were born after those boys and yet they know their names and they know how much those boys meant to all of us in the family.

I once heard someone ask the mother how she got though it and her reply simply was 'when you are in hell all you can do is keep going'

I wish you peace Bear and please be kind to yourself.

Every best wish.

Four Phucs Ache

Thinking of you and yours.

RIP little Jack bear.

My deepest sympathies to you and your wife Bear, and to all of you who have experienced the loss of your baby.

Rest in Peace baby Jack xx