Baby screaming in restaurant

c68zapdsm5i1ru

I was in a restaurant at lunchtime yesterday with a couple of friends. A couple sitting near us had a small child in a high chair. The dad was playing a game where he hid behind a napkin and then peeped out and the baby would start shrieking with delight. This went on for about ten minutes and the screams were getting really ear piercing. Eventually a woman at a nearby table went over and said something and the father stopped but didn't look too happy about it.


One of my friends thought the woman was out of order but myself and other friend were grateful to her. Just wondering who you think was in the right? Would never have asked the dad to stop myself but the noise was really starting to get on my nerves.

whatismyname

There is no right or wrong. It's all about perspective.

SEPT 23 1989

Depends on the establishment you are eating in

JustTheOne

Go to a restaurant that doesn't allow kids if it bothers you.

Simple.

fussyonion

But people would complain if the child was bawling his head off so you can't win.
As annoying as it seems, I wouldn't say anything..the father was trying to keep the child amused and it's nice to hear a happy baby.

osarusan

Can we execute everybody in the restaurant?

Mfarr3ll

Personally I want to say the lady that approached the dad is wrong. I remember having my first child out only a few days old and he started to cry and everyone in the cafe I was in just stared, first timr mum I was so so upset I never took him out for months when I had my second child I had a conversation with my husband about the first time we took our son out and said I will not be going outside to any eateries with our second as I was so embarrassed. He then said I was wrong and if people didn't understand that babies cry it's there issue if the management approach you then it's a different story and it would be a different story if it was a restaurant at night time.

TerrorFirmer

In a place where being are paying for a service, you have some level of expectation that it will not be filled with the persistant sound of a screaming child.

30 seconds or sporadic outbursts - absolutely fine of course. 10 minutes of constant screaming/shrieking instigated like you're described - not really.

I was at the cinema before and a woman brought a baby in with her! It shrieked and screamed quite a lot, as babies tend to do naturally enough. Eventually someone complained to staff and they asked her to leave - she flew off the handle. How dare you, outrage, discrimination, etc.

doolox

I cannot stand loud intrusive noises while I am eating, especially in a restaurant where I have paid a lot to enjoy my meal. It is up to the staff and management to sort out these things though and I would not approach a noise maker on my own without first bringing it to the attention of the staff or management of the restaurant.

I once had this problem with a loud laughing crowd on a hens night out or something similar. We asked to be moved as far away as possible from them and were accommodated, lucky it was a quiet night and they could do that.

Another place I find loud and fast running children annoying is in supermarkets. I came across two little brats running and chasing and nearly collided with them, they went around the corner and straight into a shelf packer who proceeded to barrage them with a stringful of disparaging language while still staying on the right side of decency.

Delightfully, he managed to stay just inside the rules but get his message across without risking his job or conduct by resorting to foul language etc....

etoughguy

It was lunchtime so it wouldn't have bothered me in the slightest and I would have told that woman to mind her own business if it happened to me. Personally speaking it wouldn't bother me in the least but I can appreciate people who never had kids might not be as understanding

c68zapdsm5i1ru

Mfarr3ll wrote: »

Personally I want to say the lady that approached the dad is wrong. I remember having my first child out only a few days old and he started to cry and everyone in the cafe I was in just stared, first timr mum I was so so upset I never took him out for months when I had my second child I had a conversation with my husband about the first time we took our son out and said I will not be going outside to any eateries with our second as I was so embarrassed. He then said I was wrong and if people didn't understand that babies cry it's there issue if the management approach you then it's a different story and it would be a different story if it was a restaurant at night time.

I think there's a happier medium really. A baby emitting the odd wail is something you expect in a busy restaurant during the day. But long prolonged crying is a different matter and it is nice if parents take it on turns to bring the baby outside.

looksee

I think you should be able to expect to have a reasonable conversation in a restaurant. Since the father was deliberately encouraging the child to scream he was out of order.

Yesterday I was in the 'extra seating' area of a cafe and one person close to us was having a long conversation with someone on a smart phone. In order that she could look at the link image of the other person she had the conversation on speaker. It was in, maybe, Polish, so we could ignore the content of the conversation, still the jabber was more penetrating than an ordinary conversation. At the same time a woman at another table was having a conversation, also in another language, she was talking very loud, very fast and very constantly (no one else got a word in ) and it was a bit mesmerising. Not the best environment to try and have a normal conversation!

The Raptor

Babies are ok, as if they cry, at least decent parents would try to stop them. Running kids on the other hand. They should have dog leads on them.

etoughguy

looksee wrote: »

I think you should be able to expect to have a reasonable conversation in a restaurant. Since the father was deliberately encouraging the child to scream he was out of order.

Yesterday I was in the 'extra seating' area of a cafe and one person close to us was having a long conversation with someone on a smart phone. In order that she could look at the link image of the other person she had the conversation on speaker. It was in, maybe, Polish, so we could ignore the content of the conversation, still the jabber was more penetrating than an ordinary conversation. At the same time a woman at another table was having a conversation, also in another language, she was talking very loud, very fast and very constantly (no one else got a word in ) and it was a bit mesmerising. Not the best environment to try and have a normal conversation!

The correct term is playing with / entertaining his child

BettePorter

Depends on the situation. If the baby is bawling id just feel sorry for the parent. But it seems like the father was the one causing him to shriek, albeit happily. Funny a few times, but after a while ..... seriously man, we get it! Doubt i'd say anything, but i'd be throwing him daggers.

goz83

If the woman had approached me while I was entertaining my baby, I would have sternly told her where to go. How dare her. It was lunch time, not a romantic meal in a 5 star establishment. If you don't want to hear babies laughing/crying then don't go to places where they have high chairs.

That said, I would completely understand if the baby was screaming crying, which is distressing for everyone. In that case, I would leave if I had to. I'm not inconsiderate, but I won't hide away in a hole until my children are old enough to leave the nest.

Wabbit Ears

As a parent of two I have to say the father was out of order and deserved to be told off.

Some parents look at their kids with blinkers on and can be completly oblivious that their kid is not the only thing in the world. This father was generating this noise for no reason then his personal happiness at hearing the kid laugh at the expense of the other diners enjoyment of their meals.

This is not the same scenario at all like a crying or noisy kid which I am sympathetic to.

One eyed Jack

Yeah I can see where the woman was coming from alright, and the father away in their own world thinking they didn't have to be considerate of other people in the restaurant. I don't know if I'd have done the same as the woman though because it's just not something I do. There's no real right or wrong when it comes to babies, we make allowances, but adults definitely ought to know better and be aware when they're causing a disturbance.

You can't eject the father from the restaurant and leave the baby to eat their food in peace

goz83

Wabbit Ears wrote: »

As a parent of two I have to say the father was out of order and deserved to be told off.

Some parents look at their kids with blinkers on and can be completly oblivious that their kid is not the only thing in the world. This father was generating this noise for no reason then his personal happiness at hearing the kid laugh at the expense of the other diners enjoyment of their meals.

This is not the same scenario at all like a crying or noisy kid which I am sympathetic to.

As a father of 5, I would disagree with you. Entertaining a child most often prevents the crying most people cannot stand to listen to. Damage control.

AryaStark

Beatrice Inexpensive Staple wrote: »

I was in a restaurant at lunchtime yesterday with a couple of friends. A couple sitting near us had a small child in a high chair. The dad was playing a game where he hid behind a napkin and then peeped out and the baby would start shrieking with delight. This went on for about ten minutes and the screams were getting really ear piercing. Eventually a woman at a nearby table went over and said something and the father stopped but didn't look too happy about it.


One of my friends thought the woman was out of order but myself and other friend were grateful to her. Just wondering who you think was in the right? Would never have asked the dad to stop myself but the noise was really starting to get on my nerves.

I would definitely think that the woman asking them to be quite was out of order. I would understand if it was at night or in the evening but not at lunch time.
I don't have kids myself but if I was out with my nephew at lunch and was asked to be quite I would be very annoyed.

Edward Hopper

It was a lunchtime, if the restaurant had an issue with the noise they could have said, fair enough, randomer off another table telling them what to do, get bent.

meeeeh

I think there is a happy medium. You try to entertain your child but you also try to be mindful of others. I would have more understanding for a baby or young child making noise than a group of drunken adults but you still try to minimise it. Anyway it more seems to me that father was showing off what a great father he is than there was any particular need to entertain the child in that way. A bit of look at me going on.

Keane2baMused

Wabbit Ears wrote: »

As a parent of two I have to say the father was out of order and deserved to be told off.

Some parents look at their kids with blinkers on and can be completly oblivious that their kid is not the only thing in the world. This father was generating this noise for no reason then his personal happiness at hearing the kid laugh at the expense of the other diners enjoyment of their meals.

This is not the same scenario at all like a crying or noisy kid which I am sympathetic to.

And also as a parent of two I think this statement is a little insane.

It was lunchtime, OP didn't say where but I doubt it was Patrick Guilbauds or Chapter One.

It's also highly unlikely the father was "generating this noise for no reason". As someone else said it was most likely damage control and he probably thought he was doing everyone else a favour by keeping the child amused and not crying.

You literally cannot win.

OP children have a right to be in eateries that are suitable. If they laugh/ cry / fart and you don't like it, it would be advisable to avoid restaurants that welcome children and families.

Galwayguy35

A screaming kid is annoying, maybe my tolerance levels are low seeing as i don't have any myself but when the parents are trying their best to calm the kid I think most people would understand.

However letting them run riot around restaurants, pubs (in the daytime) and in supermarkets just isn't on.

And it does happen.

VincePP

Most posters don't seem to have read the op.

The father was encouraging the child to shriek louder and louder - totally disrespectful to other patrons.

Most people have no issue with the normal cry of a baby or other sounds especially at lunchtime.

But for a parent to encourage the child to shriek is showing that the parent himself has very little regard to anyone else and is a selfish ignorant ahole.

osarusan

VincePP wrote: »

Most people have no issue with the normal cry of a baby

AH says No.

AryaStark

meeeeh wrote: »

I think there is a happy medium. You try to entertain your child but you also try to be mindful of others. I would have more understanding for a baby or young child making noise than a group of drunken adults but you still try to minimise it. Anyway it more seems to me that father was showing off what a great father he is than there was any particular need to entertain the child in that way. A bit of look at me going on.

Or maybe a father enjoying a bit of family time! Bit mad that you think he was showing off... I would say he was enjoying his family!

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

etoughguy wrote: »

The correct term is playing with / entertaining his child

What's wrong with what she said?

omahaid

You have to be some miserable *astard to have issue with a happy baby

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

AryaStark wrote: »

Or maybe a father enjoying a bit of family time! Bit mad that you think he was showing off... I would say he was enjoying his family!

And that's great but not at the expense of everyone else. He wants to make his baby shriek, then bring the baby outside/home. My dog knows how to bark when you say "say woof" to him. It's adorable. When we go out in public I don't sit and tell him to say woof constantly because that would make me a condescending self entitled prick

Cathy.C

Beatrice Inexpensive Staple wrote: »

The dad was playing a game where he hid behind a napkin and then peeped out and the baby would start shrieking with delight. This went on for about ten minutes and the screams were getting really ear piercing. Eventually a woman at a nearby table went over and said something and the father stopped but didn't look too happy about it.

You've misunderstood what happened.

The woman didn't go over to complain, she went over as she most likely thought that man was flirting with her.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WqO6vJTUOkM

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

omahaid wrote: »

You have to be some miserable *astard to have issue with a happy baby

Nothing at all wrong with a happy baby, but 10 minutes of screaming is not cute. You cannot expect strangers to be as entralled with your child and it's crying or screaming as you are

meeeeh

AryaStark wrote: »

Or maybe a father enjoying a bit of family time! Bit mad that you think he was showing off... I would say he was enjoying his family!

He can enjoy his family a bit quieter in the restaurant. Are you saying that the only place he could enjoy time with his child in that way is a restaurant. BTW I have two kids, I love when they laugh or scream of excitement, I just don't think they are a god's gift to everyone around too

Keane2baMused

LexieOnRale wrote: »

And that's great but not at the expense of everyone else. He wants to make his baby shriek, then bring the baby outside/home. My dog knows how to bark when you say "say woof" to him. It's adorable. When we go out in public I don't sit and tell him to say woof constantly because that would make me a condescending self entitled prick

Comparing a dog to a baby?

Also what expense exactly? If it offends your ears so much you don't have to be there.

I've had the misfortune of listening to obnoxious idiots sh1te on in restaurants or laugh like morons but I don't go complaining to management.

etoughguy

LexieOnRale wrote: »

What's wrong with what she said?

My mistake, clearly the parent was deliberately making the child scream, as you do. I was taking the common sense approach of assuming he was playing with his child but what was I thinking

etoughguy

LexieOnRale wrote: »

And that's great but not at the expense of everyone else. He wants to make his baby shriek, then bring the baby outside/home. My dog knows how to bark when you say "say woof" to him. It's adorable. When we go out in public I don't sit and tell him to say woof constantly because that would make me a condescending self entitled prick

Just as well you own a dog and not a child then

meeeeh

I think some people should get a bit of perspective that little kids should not always be the centre of universe. Nobody was complaining child to a dog just self centered behavior to another type of self centered behavior. It's not that hard to understand the point Lexie was making.

Keane2baMused

meeeeh wrote: »

I think some people should get a bit of perspective that little kids should not always be the centre of universe. Nobody was complaining child to a dog just self centered behavior to another type of self centered behavior.

But why is it self centred? I doubt the father was making the child shriek for the hell of it.


If the child was crying people would moan too so you just can't win evidently.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Keane2baMused wrote: »

Comparing a dog to a baby?

Also what expense exactly? If it offends your ears so much you don't have to be there.

I've had the misfortune of listening to obnoxious idiots sh1te on in restaurants or laugh like morons but I don't go complaining to management.

Hahaha it's parents like this that for years made me not want kids. Then I realised you can actually be a parent without the horrible attitude of "my kid can do what they like and if you don't like it then tough".

If YOUR child is causing a scene, then it's YOUR responsibility to deal with it. Sitting there oblivious to YOUR child screaming and roaring makes YOU a knob. Not everyone else. You seriously expect people who've paid for lunch to get up and leave if they're not mesmerised by your kids tantrums?
Get a grip

Kids cry, big deal. If a child is constantly crying, and won't stop then it's on you to get up and deal with it like a responsible adult and not put your kids behaviour on everyone else. Being a parent is a responsibility. If your child is very upset, take the child outside. If the child is running around and liable to cause an accident, bring a colouring book and make them sit down. If they're not able to sit down and behave themselves, bring them somewhere that they can run around.

It seems to be some parents attitude that they can bring their child wherever they like, their child can behave whatever way they like, it doesn't matter if everyone else's lunch is ruined, as long as you enjoy yours. Great attitude to have, well done.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

etoughguy wrote: »

Just as well you own a dog and not a child then

When I'm out and about with a child, I am mindful that everyone else is out too and deal with how the child acts accordingly.

genericguy

Yeah i tend to tell the parents of noisy kids to cop on. I didn't spunk in you/your missus and I don't want to deal with the consequences. I don't want my afternoon punctuated with the sound of your screaming brat. Actually had some geebag whinging yesterday because I quietly and politely moved to another table in a place to avoid the sound of little Chantelle screaming.

I plan to open a restaurant and set kids portions at €250 a head.

Dirty Dingus McGee

omahaid wrote: »

You have to be some miserable *astard to have issue with a happy baby

Some people want a bit of peace and quiet at lunch and not have to listen to a child shrieking (whether it's in delight or not).

I despise people talking loudly on their phones for ages in public as well.A small bit of noise for a minute is understandable if it's going on for a good while it's completely disrespectful to other people.

People shouldn't have to suffer because someone else has a child.

One eyed Jack

Keane2baMused wrote: »

But why is it self centred? I doubt the father was making the child shriek for the hell of it.


If the child was crying people would moan too so you just can't win evidently.

But that appears to be exactly what he was doing? I don't expect a baby to know any better, but a fully grown adult? Yes, I do expect them to know better and be more considerate of other people in the restaurant.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

etoughguy wrote: »

My mistake, clearly the parent was deliberately making the child scream, as you do. I was taking the common sense approach of assuming he was playing with his child but what was I thinking

Doesn't matter what he was doing. His actions was making the child scream. Doesn't matter if he was playing, or joking, or being serious, the end result was a screaming child.

Speedwell

When the nebby woman is out with her cackling girlfriends having too much wine and making the rafters shake in a nice restaurant where I'm trying to eat a peaceful dinner, is it OK for me to go over and tell them to shut their jackal yaps?

One eyed Jack

Speedwell wrote: »

When the nebby woman is out with her cackling girlfriends having too much wine and making the rafters shake where I'm trying to eat a peaceful dinner, is it OK for me to go over and tell them to shut their jackal yaps?

Yes?

padd b1975

Wabbit Ears wrote: »

As a parent of two I have to say the father was out of order and deserved to be told off.

Some parents look at their kids with blinkers on and can be completly oblivious that their kid is not the only thing in the world. This father was generating this noise for no reason then his personal happiness at hearing the kid laugh at the expense of the other diners enjoyment of their meals.

This is not the same scenario at all like a crying or noisy kid which I am sympathetic to.

Yep.

"Look at me everyone, I'm an amazing parent!"

meeeeh

Keane2baMused wrote: »

But why is it self centred? I doubt the father was making the child shriek for the hell of it.


If the child was crying people would moan too so you just can't win evidently.

I never thought playing peekaboo with a napkin is the only way to entertain a child. Yes sometimes you can't avoid them get loud but usually we managed to entertain them in quieter ways or take them out for a little bit. Lunches with kids are often not that enjoyable for parents because you have to take care of your kid and make sure the others can enjoy their time too. But parenthood doesn't absolve you of responsibility to be mindful of others.

darkestlord

I think as you get older you tend to not care what others think. I would have kindly told madame to mind ones business or one will be drowning in her spaghetti. Fcuk them

andekwarhola

It's can be kind of annoying to hear if it's constant but I just tune out. It's just a child.

It's not really any more annoying than ambient restaurant noise like overloud drunk conversation, laughter; talking on phones etc that often is deemed acceptable- often by the very same people that just get worked up at the mere sight of kids in these situations.

Noise happens in social, public places. Deal with it.

AryaStark

meeeeh wrote: »

He can enjoy his family a bit quieter in the restaurant. Are you saying that the only place he could enjoy time with his child in that way is a restaurant. BTW I have two kids, I love when they laugh or scream of excitement, I just don't think they are a god's gift to everyone around too

Or you can move to a quite bit of the restaurant .. why should he leave. It is daytime and kids are allowed to be out and make noise ... its life.

What really annoys me when I am out during the day is people in restaurants who are drinking and getting drunk and loud.
When that happens I Finnish my meal and leave. As it is annoying me I am the one who leaves ...