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Alan Partridge Superthread - Sponsored by Dettol

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    #602
    Mike Litoris
    Registered Users Posts: 6,110 ✭✭✭Mike Litoris


    ^^
    He dost venture south!


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    #603
    take everything
    Registered Users Posts: 9,805 ✭✭✭take everything


    Skid X wrote: »
    I don't think Alan Partridge gets nearly enough credit for having Joe Beesley and Cheeky Monkey on his final KMKYWAP shoe.

    He was honouring a commitment he gave in Bournemouth 15 years earlier that if he ever made it big he would give Joe and Cheeky Monkey their chance on Television.

    Very few people would have remembered that pledge and even fewer would have seen it through.

    A man of honour.





    And yet somehow when people remember that episode it tends to be for the unfortunate incident where Alan accidentally tragically shot Forbes McAllister dead with Lord Byron's duelling pistol. I mean, Alan didn't know the gun was loaded and Forbes was a complete and utter sh1t anyway.

    Was that the same episode.
    I thought that was the Christmas Special where he shot that guy.

    Anyway love the Joe Beasley bit. Jon Thomson as subversive and cringy as ever.

    Also Rebecca Front and Doon McKichan were very sexy back then.


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    #604
    Skid X
    Registered Users Posts: 21,444 ✭✭✭✭Skid X


    take everything wrote: »
    Was that the same episode.
    I thought that was the Christmas Special where he shot that guy.

    Nope

    Alan tragically accidentally shot Forbes McAllister in the final episode of KMKYWAP

    After a thorough investigation he was not charged by the Crown Prosecution Service and he went on to host the Christmas Special Knowing Me Knowing Yule, which the BBC were contractually obliged to broadcast.

    During this show Alan punched a man in a Wheelchair, and BBC Director of Programming Tony Hayers (with a Turkey).


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    #605
    fryup
    Registered Users Posts: 18,067 ✭✭✭✭fryup


    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    "please don't take my chat away from me"


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    #606
    IamtheWalrus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,075 ✭✭✭IamtheWalrus


    Watched S01E01 earlier. Classic Alan.

    I'm leaving you, you cow!


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    #607
    Welsh Megaman
    Registered Users Posts: 72,411 ✭✭✭✭Welsh Megaman


    IamtheWalrus wrote: »
    Watched S01E01 earlier. Classic Alan.

    I'm leaving you, you cow!


    Jet from Gladiators to host a millennium barn dance at Yeovil aerodrome. Properly Policed. It must not, I repeat NOT, turn into an all-night rave.


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    #608
    Big Vern
    Registered Users Posts: 602 ✭✭✭Big Vern


    Welsh Megaman wrote: »
    Jet from Gladiators to host a millennium barn dance at Yeovil aerodrome. Properly Policed. It must not, I repeat NOT, turn into an all-night rave.

    ‘Lady Shapes with Alan Partridge’. I look at the changing shape of ladies through the ages. From fat chubby ladies of the renaissance to hard-faced Cromwelling sour pusses. Right up to 20th century well-toned women like Sharon Davies and, Jet from Gladiators.


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    #609
    Ipso
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,995 ✭✭✭Ipso


    I’m going nowhere, Lynn. Literally, I’ve been on the round about for the last hour.


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    #610
    Big Vern
    Registered Users Posts: 602 ✭✭✭Big Vern


    I’ll be honest Lynn, I’m at a loose end, today. That’s why I’m err… That’s why I’m err, talking. Talking. Talk… That’s why I’m talking.


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    #611
    .red.
    Registered Users Posts: 3,350 ✭✭✭.red.


    Watership Alan might be my favourite episode of any TV series I've ever seen. I'm struggling to pick my favourite quote as there's just too many,
    It might be
    "Sorry about that. Robert a bit slow on the uptake there. Don’t know what he had for breakfast. Presumably an infected spinal column in a bap. Just making a quick joke there about how infected cattle feed can attack the central nervous system. It’s just coming up to 5:35am"
    Or
    "If you see a lovely field with a family having a picnic, and there’s a nice pond in it, you fill in the pond with concrete, you plough the family into the field, you blow up the tree, and use the leaves to make a dress for your wife who’s also your brother"
    Another good one

    "Well, listen, I’ll tell you what the point is. You have big sheds, but nobody’s allowed in, and inside these big sheds are twenty-foot high chickens. Because of all the chemicals you put in them. And these chickens are scared. They don’t know why they’re so big. They go “oh why am I so massive?” And they’re looking down on all the other little chickens, and they think they’re in an aeroplane because all the other chickens are so small… do you deny that? [Peter has left] No. His silence, I think, speaks volumes."

    But the very best is the final word when he gets the porn turned back on and remembers he's in a cast and says
    "Ohhhhhhh"


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    #612
    ligerdub
    Registered Users Posts: 2,584 ✭✭✭ligerdub


    .red. wrote: »
    Watership Alan might be my favourite episode of any TV series I've ever seen. I'm struggling to pick my favourite quote as there's just too many,
    It might be
    "Sorry about that. Robert a bit slow on the uptake there. Don’t know what he had for breakfast. Presumably an infected spinal column in a bap. Just making a quick joke there about how infected cattle feed can attack the central nervous system. It’s just coming up to 5:35am"
    Or
    "If you see a lovely field with a family having a picnic, and there’s a nice pond in it, you fill in the pond with concrete, you plough the family into the field, you blow up the tree, and use the leaves to make a dress for your wife who’s also your brother"
    Another good one

    "Well, listen, I’ll tell you what the point is. You have big sheds, but nobody’s allowed in, and inside these big sheds are twenty-foot high chickens. Because of all the chemicals you put in them. And these chickens are scared. They don’t know why they’re so big. They go “oh why am I so massive?” And they’re looking down on all the other little chickens, and they think they’re in an aeroplane because all the other chickens are so small… do you deny that? [Peter has left] No. His silence, I think, speaks volumes."

    But the very best is the final word when he gets the porn turned back on and remembers he's in a cast and says
    "Ohhhhhhh"

    Pretty good shout now that you mention it. I'd have the Globex Simpsons in there too.

    There's an underrated part of that episode where you see the barge approaching a bridge where farmers have congregated. Partridge is mid-spiel and has his back to them so it appears the joke is that he's oblivious to what's about to happen (which is true) but after you know what's coming you can listen to what he's saying:

    "The Norfolk Broads offer the true peace and tranquillity of the English countryside. A million miles from the urban decay of the Manchester Ship Canal, and the pot-smoking, whore-ridden waterways of Amsterdam. Indeed, disused cotton mills and legalised hardcore pornography are a million miles away from your thoughts as you negotiate the Norfolk Broads. In fact, the very fact that hardcore pornography is not on the agenda…" hit by cow.

    Marvelous.


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    #613
    Ipso
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,995 ✭✭✭Ipso


    We put two pounds of mashed up Dundee cake in there earlier, and now it's all gone. Peace of mind for those with elderly relatives, I'm sure.


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    #614
    ohnonotgmail
    Registered Users Posts: 40,354 ✭✭✭✭ohnonotgmail


    Watching the episode now where he is pitching the tv shows. Knowing M.E. knowing you.


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    #615
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    He's a mentalist.


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    #616
    .red.
    Registered Users Posts: 3,350 ✭✭✭.red.


    [Deleted User] wrote: »
    He's a mentalist.

    No thanks, I don't want to be part of your sex festival!


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    #617
    IamtheWalrus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,075 ✭✭✭IamtheWalrus


    .red. wrote: »
    No thanks, I don't want to be part of your sex festival!

    They do it on purpose lynn!


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    #618
    Mike Litoris
    Registered Users Posts: 6,110 ✭✭✭Mike Litoris


    Deleted User wrote: »
    He's a mentalist.



    He's crackers, Man!


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    #619
    Big Vern
    Registered Users Posts: 602 ✭✭✭Big Vern


    Help me someone!

    (Love when he is running away he stops to make sure to remote lock his car!!!)


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    #620
    Ipso
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,995 ✭✭✭Ipso


    This thread is making me clinically fed up.


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    #621
    Realt Dearg Sec
    Registered Users Posts: 10,863 ✭✭✭✭Realt Dearg Sec


    Ipso wrote: »
    This thread is making me clinically fed up.

    Boo hoo.


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    #622
    Ipso
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,995 ✭✭✭Ipso


    Realt Dearg Sec wrote: »
    Boo hoo.

    Why so blue, Peter.


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    #623
    Realt Dearg Sec
    Registered Users Posts: 10,863 ✭✭✭✭Realt Dearg Sec


    Ipso wrote: »
    Realt Dearg Sec wrote: »
    Boo hoo.

    Why so blue, Peter.
    Needless to say I had the last laugh, now **** off!


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    #624
    Big Vern
    Registered Users Posts: 602 ✭✭✭Big Vern


    Ipso wrote: »
    This thread is making me clinically fed up.

    This Country!


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    #625
    De Bhál
    Registered Users Posts: 2,881 ✭✭✭De Bhál


    in off the red



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    #626
    Ipso
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,995 ✭✭✭Ipso


    "I once ran over a fox, the thing was it wasn't quite dead so I had to go back and finish it off with the jack, the time is 8:52....."


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    #627
    Welsh Megaman
    Registered Users Posts: 72,411 ✭✭✭✭Welsh Megaman


    John Creedon just played ‘Melting Pot’ by Blue Mink.

    Put me in mind of this... :D


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4TsySFCY1U


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    #628
    discobeaker
    Registered Users Posts: 1,243 ✭✭✭discobeaker


    Welsh Megaman wrote: »
    John Creedon just played ‘Melting Pot’ by Blue Mink.

    Put me in mind of this... :D


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4TsySFCY1U

    It's a race of people and it's a type of food


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    #629
    Ipso
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,995 ✭✭✭Ipso


    Yeah, can I just read you something from Top Gear magazine? No, it’s alright, I’ve got it here, I’ve got it here. [Opens the magazine on the bed and reads] 'With a mere ninety break-horse-power available, progress is too leisurely to be called fast, but on the motorway in fifth gear the Megane’s slow pace really becomes a pain. Uphill runs become power-sappingly mundane, while overtaking National Express coaches can become a long, drawn-out affair.' Not my words, Carol, the words of Top Gear magazine. "


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    #630
    thecretinhop
    Registered Users Posts: 6,531 ✭✭✭thecretinhop


    partridge in your pocket on play store is awesome free as well


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    #631
    loyatemu
    Registered Users Posts: 14,885 ✭✭✭✭loyatemu


    Ipso wrote: »
    Not my words, Carol, the words of Top Gear magazine.

    this is a phrase that comes in handy surprisingly often.


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