Online dating

B.A._Baracus

maudgonner wrote: »

Wow, not jumping to conclusions at all there, are we?

Nah, its more like you taking a clear joke, twisting it, so you can be offended. But I guess this is where you say how it wasn't a funny joke, right?

Colser

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

Nah, its more like you taking a clear joke, twisting it, so you can be offended. But I guess this is where you say how it wasn't a funny joke, right?

I thought it was funnyish:pac:

maudgonner

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

Nah, its more like you taking a clear joke, twisting it, so you can be offended. But I guess this is where you say how it wasn't a funny joke, right?

Fair enough, my sense of humour bypass obviously kicked in cause I was stuck late at work :pac:


(Deletes claim to have a good sense of humour from dating profile...)

Foxtrol

Chain Smoker wrote: »

I've been using this tinder alternative called Bumble that's pretty popular here where the woman has to message first and if she doesn't within 24 that match is cancelled. A guy can refresh one match per day if he likes, I assume to send a slight message that he does want to hear from that person in particular. It's really clever imo.

Anyways, asides from the overall design being by far the best I've encountered, it's also had the most engaging conversations by far and I suspect that has a lot to do with the extra immediate investment that comes from being the person to message rather than the one to deal with heaps of tedious openers and inappropriate ****.

Big fan of Bumble.

It is funny though that after seeing so many women with profiles on other sites stating along the lines of “Make more effort than just saying ‘Hi’ when messaging me”, that about 95% of initial messages I receive from women on Bumble are just ‘Hi’ (with maybe an emoji thrown in if they’re feeling generous). Not complaining at all though, as I’m not sure what some people expect from an initial message to a complete stranger. It’s however clearly not so easy making the first move when the shoe is on the other foot.

Foxtrol

In general I think OD is great. I believe it’s especially good for Irish dating culture, as chatting up strangers is unfortunately still seen by many as taboo unless one or both parties are drunk.

One possible downside with OD (especially in big cities) is that you nearly have too many options, meaning you can end up with the feeling that something a bit better is just one more swipe away.

Obviously better to have feast than famine but it could easily cause difficulty if one or both parties have that mindset. It can lead to people multi-dating, not giving enough time to get to know each other if there isn’t instant fireworks, and jumping ship as soon as anything goes wrong. These are all normal issues in RL dating but I feel OD intensifies them.

Alf Veedersane

Ruu wrote: »

Offline dating is where its at. Posted in my reply and waiting for a response...any day now. *watches for postman*

Send a French letter.

Makes you seem cosmopolitan.

You're welcome.

worded

For women online dating is like a huge supermarket of choice with endless
Rows of men to choose from

For guys - we get a corner shelf at LIDL

armaghlad

Rhea Rose wrote: »

Can't you select age preferences etc. on POF? Maybe you just don't fall into the age bracket she's looking for. I wouldn't take it personally.

Oh I didn't - It's just rarely I see a girl on pof who I think "wow". Aw well Maeve85 if you're reading gimme a second chance

Richard Hillman

Love tinder but wouldn't go on a date with any of them or even message them.

I just like to have a guilt-free gander at the lovely ladies. I have no interest in talking to them about themselves or telling them about myself

Richard Hillman

Richard Hillman wrote: »

Love tinder but wouldn't go on a date with any of them or even message them.

I just like to have a guilt-free gander at the lovely ladies. I have no interest in talking to them about themselves or telling them about myself

Would you not be better off looking through an Oxendales catalogue?

HiGlo

when it comes to Internet dating, I'm definitely doing it wrong!!!
I've been on POF for about 6 years now and I've never met anyone from there.... I haven't even managed to get beyond maybe 2 or 3 messages each exchanged....
I get the odd message here & there but always from guys who I, personally, don't find attractive and the guys I do fancy never message me.

Same with Tinder, I never match and on the rare occasion I do, they either unmatch or don't message me.

The natural conclusion here is....... I'm a minger.

BorneTobyWilde

Mormon girls are the best to date. They don't drink smoke or do drugs. They dress so elegantly and don't sleep with anyone before marriage. They read a lot, bake cookies and like to travel and keep fit. Its a relationship based on common interests friendships and romance. I know a girl called Jill and she is the funniest girl I know, she's clever attractive and very beautiful. She's the life of every party.
I like this more than Irish girls who love to get drunk, smoke like chimneys and sleep with different guys every week. Plus they end every sentence with '' like'' and go out on a winters night in skimpy clothing and heels they can't even walk in.
Yep give me a flat shoe mormon girl any day.

Martypants1

HiGlo wrote: »

when it comes to Internet dating, I'm definitely doing it wrong!!!
I've been on POF for about 6 years now and I've never met anyone from there.... I haven't even managed to get beyond maybe 2 or 3 messages each exchanged....
I get the odd message here & there but always from guys who I, personally, don't find attractive and the guys I do fancy never message me.

Same with Tinder, I never match and on the rare occasion I do, they either unmatch or don't message me.

The natural conclusion here is....... I'm a minger.

Not neccessarily. Could just be going for guys that are looking for girls that are hotter than you.

Martypants1

BorneTobyWilde wrote: »

Mormon girls are the best to date. They don't drink smoke or do drugs. They dress so elegantly and don't sleep with anyone before marriage. They read a lot, bake cookies and like to travel and keep fit. Its a relationship based on common interests friendships and romance. I know a girl called Jill and she is the funniest girl I know, she's clever attractive and very beautiful. She's the life of every party.
I like this more than Irish girls who love to get drunk, smoke like chimneys and sleep with different guys every week. Plus they end every sentence with '' like'' and go out on a winters night in skimpy clothing and heels they can't even walk in.
Yep give me a flat shoe mormon girl any day.

Foreign girls have been the nicest dates I've gone on with. Like they are 50/50 in the meeting. Irish girls sometimes have this vibe that you are there to impress them, like being on Dragons Den.

BorneTobyWilde

HiGlo wrote: »

when it comes to Internet dating, I'm definitely doing it wrong!!!
I've been on POF for about 6 years now and I've never met anyone from there.... I haven't even managed to get beyond maybe 2 or 3 messages each exchanged....
I get the odd message here & there but always from guys who I, personally, don't find attractive and the guys I do fancy never message me.

Same with Tinder, I never match and on the rare occasion I do, they either unmatch or don't message me.

The natural conclusion here is....... I'm a minger.

I knew at that point you were a girl before I read the rest. Guys on pof last for months before accounts are deleted. They delete male accounts on going to keep it fresh. More guys than girls on there.
That's why POF is no good . I had an account was deleted by them. Opened another deleted by them within 24 hours. And I've never said boo to a goose. Too polite if anything.

maudgonner

Deleted User wrote: »

Would you not be better off looking through an Oxendales catalogue?

Or Damart maybe, thermal vests might be his turn-on?

(Is Damart still a thing, I wonder?)

HiGlo

HiGlo wrote: »

when it comes to Internet dating, I'm definitely doing it wrong!!!
I've been on POF for about 6 years now and I've never met anyone from there.... I haven't even managed to get beyond maybe 2 or 3 messages each exchanged....
I get the odd message here & there but always from guys who I, personally, don't find attractive and the guys I do fancy never message me.

Same with Tinder, I never match and on the rare occasion I do, they either unmatch or don't message me.

The natural conclusion here is....... I'm a minger.

No you're not.

Maybe your profile needs a bit of work. It's also a good idea to message first rather than waiting on the guy to do it.

Debtocracy

Debtocracy wrote: »

This is why online dating doesn’t work in the vast majority of cases: So take a girl who is 5/10. Because all men look like rapists online and because of female hypergamy, she will only talk with an 8/10 guy or above (only 20% of guys are rated above average attractiveness online).

So the 8/10 guy and 5/10 girl get talking and go on a date. While the 8/10 guy is happy to get a date, he is probably not going to consider the girl as relationship material (he’d rather an 8/10 girl but she won’t talk to him). As such, his main motivation is to have sex with this girl rather than form any meaningful relationship. The 5/10 girl therefore concludes that all men are pigs and that there’s no good men out there, with the average nice guy barely registering on her radar (by ‘nice guy’ she means attractive, tall, wealthy nice guy).

This phenomena of female hypergamy is becoming more prevalent in general. There’s articles aplenty these days about how there’s no good men left, with women even attributing gender population discrepancies and higher proportions of gay men to account for the lack of good men. Interestingly, the main reason women attribute freezing their ovaries is not because of career progression, but because they cannot find a suitable partner. At the same time, men are increasing their standards for commitment and marriage so the mathematics are getting even worse – the amount of single people is increasing rapidly across the Western World and no amount of online dating apps can stem the tide.

Anyone else read this post along to dramatic music ? :pac:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mL5oHQoY-3o

Chain Smoker

Foxtrol wrote: »

Big fan of Bumble.

It is funny though that after seeing so many women with profiles on other sites stating along the lines of “Make more effort than just saying ‘Hi’ when messaging me”, that about 95% of initial messages I receive from women on Bumble are just ‘Hi’ (with maybe an emoji thrown in if they’re feeling generous). Not complaining at all though, as I’m not sure what some people expect from an initial message to a complete stranger. It’s however clearly not so easy making the first move when the shoe is on the other foot.

Ah but then you get to reflect it with "Hi, how are you?" and then they've no choice but to think of words! Muhahaha!

Shenshen

Aidan Holland wrote: »

I think dating in general these days for men is hard now I'm all for equal rights equal pay, job opportunities,free abortions and everything equal for woman But I think feminists have created this cloud of suspicion around men I mean according to them we are all potential rapists. In my opinion the rise of radical feminisem is down to single mums now look if your in the unfortunate situation that the father of your kid or kids doesn't pay child maintenance or plays no part in your children lives that's sad but please stop blaming or harbouring a hatred for all men just because you had a bad experience

So you think dating was easier before women started demanding the same rights and privileges as men? Back in the day when a man and woman who weren't related could not be alone in a room without the woman's reputation being ruined? Really?

via4

Born to be wild I'm Irish and when I tell guys I don't smoke drink or sleep with random ppl online they think it's weird that I don't!

Ben Gadot

Sorry for the (mini) bump?

Online dating is ok, I think the key is that if you do click with someone that you strike quickly. Don't spend weeks or christ, months, chatting to each other online. That just raises the expectation in both your heads to a ridiculous level and by the time you both meet, there could be real disappointment on both sides.

Anyway, I joined Tinder in January, got a few matches and got on well with a few.....but is it just me or does there seem to be a fair level of drunk people on it? The weird messages at 3am....the matches that unmatch sharpish....and then there's the poor souls who are too nice to unmatch, but only send (non weird) messages you after midnight. It's not for the weak of heart I know, just seems for time wastey on their own behalf?

Then there's the outright crazies who list their oh so reasonable demands in their profile blurb, always good for a laugh. :pac:

Mister Vain

Martypants1 wrote: »

Foreign girls have been the nicest dates I've gone on with. Like they are 50/50 in the meeting. Irish girls sometimes have this vibe that you are there to impress them, like being on Dragons Den.

I've noticed this too tbh. I also think its very difficult to express an interest in an Irish person without coming across too forward. With the foreign girls you can be more direct. "I like you, wanna go on a date?"

I've seen a lot of guys in the workplace who fancied a particular girl, but rather than ask her out they'd wait until the organised night out and only approach her after they've had a few.

via4

I joined tinder for the laugh initially then after a while being a typical girl I started getting my hopes up when a few of them were showering me with compliments etc. Us girls we can't help it we think oh is it my turn now to meet someone nice but then they go quiet haha....I agree Ben Gadot talking for weeks or months sure that's like having a penpal.
I only got one guy message late at night after our last conversation we decided not to contact each other because he was emigrating and I was looking for a man so it was pointless chatting. Then I get a message late at night I just said here listen this is a bit silly for you to text me. Haha yes the ones that unmatch straight away I think they just get a buzz out of getting a match but don't want you to message them ha.
Oh yes some ppl are really funny and original on their profiles it's a laugh alright!
I'm not sure about the drunk ppl but most guys I talk to there lives revolve around drink and they think I'm weird that I don't drink I might have one or two if I'm out but I don't base my social life around it.
Any ways I deleted tinder for now no doubt il venture back again in a few months only to see the same faces on it ha

Discodog

I would suggest that the girls who have been on a site for years change re register. Seeing that a girl has been on a site for years would totally put me off.

Internet dating can clearly become addictive. Maybe they think that the next one will be the one. Dating sites allow people to be so specific. Everything now is so visual. If you meet a girl socially your personality gets a chance but it's hard to convey it online.

Foxtrol

Discodog wrote: »

I would suggest that the girls who have been on a site for years change re register. Seeing that a girl has been on a site for years would totally put me off.

Internet dating can clearly become addictive. Maybe they think that the next one will be the one. Dating sites allow people to be so specific. Everything now is so visual. If you meet a girl socially your personality gets a chance but it's hard to convey it online.

Would you really walk up to a stranger in the real world to start a conversation in the hopes of going on a date if you didn't find them attractive?

IMO even the more visual dating sites like tinder are less 'visual' than dating in the real world. At least on the likes of tinder you can have amusing/interesting photos or bio where as if you're in a bar you're just a person in a crowd.

Lyaiera

My efforts with online dating.

Him: Hello
Me: Hi
H: How is your night
M: Ah shur grand, editing photos for a project I'm working on.
H: Where do you live
M: Cork (while thinking, "It's listed in my ****ing profile.")
H: Where in Cork
M: The city centre
H: Where in the city centre

*block*

or...

H: Having a good night?
M: Yeah, grand, I've been busy writing. How about you?
H: Lookin for sum fun?

*Block*

or...

H: Hi, what do you take photos of?
*I check his profile, he lives in Atlanta, or Frankfurt, or Brighton, or Morroco... *sigh**

armaghlad

Lyaiera wrote: »

My efforts with online dating.

Him: Hello
Me: Hi
H: How is your night
M: Ah shur grand, editing photos for a project I'm working on.
H: Where do you live
M: Cork (while thinking, "It's listed in my ****ing profile.")
H: Where in Cork
M: The city centre
H: Where in the city centre

*block*

or...

H: Having a good night?
M: Yeah, grand, I've been busy writing. How about you?
H: Lookin for sum fun?

*Block*

or...

H: Hi, what do you take photos of?
*I check his profile, he lives in Atlanta, or Frankfurt, or Brighton, or Morroco... *sigh**

Mine:

*tumbleweed*

New Message!

Her: Hi
Me: *notices distinct lack of profile pic*

*BLOCK*

Lyaiera

armaghlad wrote: »

Mine:

*tumbleweed*

New Message!

Her: Hi
Me: *notices distinct lack of profile pic*

*BLOCK*

No profile pic, and no profile filled out. No details about you in any way. But you still expect people to be responsive to you! /o\

Martypants1

Online dating would be so much easier for men and women if women laid out what they are interested in on their profile?

Like I don't be looking for anything serious but I have messaged women who say they are looking for a relationship and turns out they are interested in non serious too.

If I see people who say "Don't message if you're looking for casual etc", then I don't waste my time.