Wanker watch: Warning signs that someone is a tosser

bottlebrush

Probably mentioned here before but anybody who says 'like, omg, whatever' in every sentence. Witnessed two girls on the train today having a conversation and one was telling her story finished by 'like, omg, whatever' and her friend would answer her with her sentence finished by 'like, omg, whatever' and this went on during the whole conversation.
(incidentally I was trying to listen to the radio on my headphones and not ear-wig, but had to give up because their chat drowned out the sound!).
Maybe not tosser-ish or wanker-ish behaviour but definitely most annoying.

Wes Palmer Lee

Someone who's only gone from the locality a few months then comes back with an accent....
Drives me fckin mad that...

everlast75

People who use the phrase "oh you MUST go to.... (wherever).." and go on to tell you all the stuff that "only the locals know" as if they're the seasoned traveller who knows better.

And anyone who uses the phrase "jo-berg".... ffs

Ol' Donie

Whoever sings that whiney b*ll**** about "all your perfect imperfections" that's on in the taxi I'm in.

Grow a pair, you watery douche.

Brendan Bendar

everlast75 wrote: »

People who use the phrase "oh you MUST go to.... (wherever).." and go on to tell you all the stuff that "only the locals know" as if they're the seasoned traveller who knows better.

And anyone who uses the phrase "jo-berg".... ffs

"Jo-berg"

x43r0

Brendan Bendar wrote: »

"Jo-berg"

Short for Johannesburg I assume

Brendan Bendar

x43r0 wrote: »

Short for Johannesburg I assume

Oh right, poster must have.meant "jo-burg"

PTH2009

People who say Netflix and chill and all that bolexe

Rude women who are on girls day outs, think there all owed something the way they act , same can be said for lads on lads days out

Students who like the latest cider drinking type band eg Mumford and sons, foals, coronas etc

Internet Ham

Wes Palmer Lee wrote: »

Someone who's only gone from the locality a few months then comes back with an accent....
Drives me fckin mad that...

My brother does that. Moved outside Dublin for about six weeks and came back sounding like a traveller. What an absolute cnut he is.

Shifty11

'Pint of Guinness in an old glass'

Give it a rest

Optimalprimerib

Irishcrx wrote: »

???

How does that make someone a wanker?

I have a child , but I have plenty of friends who don't have kids and some who plan on never having them...they're very good people who are lovely to my son and far far from ****? Does wanting to do your own thing in life now make you a wanker?

From your post...I don't mean to be harsh , but that's wanker talk right there.

People who don't want kids / have a family are ****. You can't have either of you **** instead of having sex.

IamtheWalrus

People who add 'phrases of the month' to their conversations. 'Random' is popular but I've gotten over that.

'does/if that makes sense?' when they've made a very mundane point. Drives me up the wall and wanting to end the conversation.

Optimalprimerib

People with the huge beatz headphones around their neck when in the company of their friends.

Irishcrx

riclad wrote: »

Anyone who has large tatoos, on their neck or down their arm ,
eg tattoos, 12 inches or more .
either you are a gangster ,or a biker or someone who has issues ,
the larger the tattoo the smaller the brain .
A good looking person does not need lots of tatoo,s .

Hold the phone now Jimmy...

I'm not a gangster , I have rode motorcycles but not anymore , I don't have any deep underlying issues and if I have a small brain I'm doing pretty well with the field I work in and what I earn..and I also wear t-shirts in work the odd time (Horror) because I like to be judged on how good I am at my job not by whats on my arms, luckily most people where I work agree with that modern centiment.

I'm fairly good looking as well Jim , I choose to have my tatoo's because it's a personal choice , because I designed them , because I like having them. I'm not trying to impress anybody , I'm not trying to be 'hard'...grow up , Tatoo's aren't the same for everyone and it's all well and good that you don't like them but don't be so judgemental about them, it's a bit wankerish. I don't judge you Jim.

suicide_circus

Shifty11 wrote: »

'Pint of Guinness in an old glass'

Give it a rest

The problem is that the modern guinness pint classes are terrible.

x43r0

suicide_circus wrote: »

The problem is that the modern guinness pint classes are terrible.

Give it a rest :pac:

Those mothers who write articles every second week for the Journal. You are not the first woman to experience motherhood and all that goes with it. Stop being so goddamn self indulgent!!

kupus

Deleted User wrote: »

Those mothers who write articles every second week for the Journal. You are not the first woman to experience motherhood and all that goes with it. Stop being so goddamn self indulgent!!

you can change that to any parent talking about their kids, it get boring after the first sentence:pac::pac::pac:

kfallon

People who hop from bandwagon to bandwagon, rugby WC last year now they are applying for tickets to Euro 2016 despite not going to an Ireland game since, prob, Poland 2012.

"I wouldn't go out and watch that shíte if you paid me!" is usually their reaction if you ask if they are going to watch a qualifier!

gimmick

Optimalprimerib wrote: »

People with the huge beatz headphones around their neck when in the company of their friends.

I think I may have posted that months ago, but the point needs quoting and said again, Beatz are a fashion accessory worn by people who just want to be seen wearing them. They look stupid and are completely over priced.

PopePalpatine

Responding to discrimination sneeringly, like so:

Discrimination, oh noes, Discrimination :rolleyes:

Mesrine65

riclad wrote: »

Anyone who has large tatoos, on their neck or down their arm ,
eg tattoos, 12 inches or more .
either you are a gangster ,or a biker or someone who has issues ,
the larger the tattoo the smaller the brain .
A good looking person does not need lots of tatoo,s .

Who made you the authority on all this?

I'm covered in tattoos, I'm a biker, I speak 3 languages fluently & have a college degree.

I'm no MENSA candidate, but your analogy "the larger the tattoo the smaller the brain" only goes to prove that you are definately a prime candidate for this thread :P

QED...

weemcd

kfallon wrote: »

People who hop from bandwagon to bandwagon, rugby WC last year now they are applying for tickets to Euro 2016 despite not going to an Ireland game since, prob, Poland 2012.

"I wouldn't go out and watch that shíte if you paid me!" is usually their reaction if you ask if they are going to watch a qualifier!

Add Conor McGregor to that. Not a peep was ever said about MMA in this country until he came along, now everyone's an expert in all aspects of unarmed combat. Breaking the bank to go to Vegas, drape themselves in a Tricolour, act the bollix and generally make us look bad as a country.

kupus

Anybody that doesnt respect conor mcgregor for what he has done, you might not like what he does, thats fine,
but give him his dues. Hes earned it. and fully deserves it.

weemcd

kupus wrote: »

Anybody that doesnt respect conor mcgregor for what he has done, you might not like what he does, thats fine,
but give him his dues. Hes earned it. and fully deserves it.

I do completely and totally 100%, I've been watching MMA for roughly 10 years now and have been incredibly impressed with McGregor.

My point was the national bandwagon jumpers that the previous poster had also mentioned.

Birneybau

Double posters. It's very easy to delete that sh!t.

OldNotWIse

ToddyDoody wrote: »

Someone who doesn't want to have kids / a family

You can have a family without having kids. A married couple is a family. The "/" is redundant in your post.

Birneybau

Double posters. It's very easy to delete that sh1t.

peteeeed

grey tracksuit bottoms , hands down pants

kfallon

peteeeed wrote: »

grey tracksuit bottoms , hands down pants

White socks, Nike air runners and a blue Helly Hanson/North Face jacket! :rolleyes: